This is the end. Thank you for all the reviews, follows and favs for the story! I appreciated the feedback so much, especially since I'm at a learning curve for this whole writing thing and anything really got me to improve (hopefully).

This is the longest chapter I think I've ever posted. I think it's lacking something and if you guys have any suggestions, I'm open to re-writing parts of this to make it better.

I hope you guys enjoy reading it. I'm not sure if there's going to be an epilogue yet. I have exams lined up for the next two weeks. But I'll try (if you guys think it's necessary).

Mistakes on this are all mine. See Chapter 1 for disclaimer.

Happy reading!

Chapter 12

Natasha was going crazy being locked up in the tower on R&R. She hated not being able to go out and work out "light excises" they told her. While her lungs were almost completely healed, the doctors didn't want to risk anything. Which mean no sparring, no running... hell she wasn't even allowed to walk for more than a mile.

Her coping methods relied on either a long work out session or a couple of bottles of vodka until she was well and over what was bothering her.

Pepper had ensured that she was monitored by Jarvis and since she was still on meds, no alcohol was to be consumed while in the house. And yes, while she is one of the greatest assassins in the world and could kill a man with her pinky finger, she wasn't stupid enough to cross one Virginia "Pepper" Potts.

Speaking of Pepper, Natasha paused in her steps to go up on the rooftop. It was Sunday morning and the tradition in the team, like movie night, was to have breakfast every first Sunday of the month. The tradition started mostly because it was the one day that Pepper let herself have an actual day off of work when the rest of the days she would tell them that they're taking a break, when in reality she had a few webcam conferences to do, at least.

The elevator opened and Natasha stepped out to the busy clamor of the team in the dining area.

"Morning Natasha," Pepper greeted her as she walked into the dining room. She took her usual seat at the table with a smile on her face.

"Good morning Pepper," Natasha greeted.

"How are you feeling today?"

"I hate being stuck in here and not being able to do anything. I'm glad to be here though. But I should be asking you how you're feeling."

Pepper chuckled at that. She hasn't even told Tony for fear that something might happen, or that Tony would make a baby Iron Man suit, but she had to tell someone and since Natasha was the one who found her crying in the bathroom on the common floor that day with a pregnancy test with her hand, Pepper figured that the secret was out.

"I think... I think I might tell him today," Pepper told her. "Clint and I worked out a plan of how I'm going to tell Tony. I'm pretty excited."

"Clint knows?" Natasha asked surprised that Pepper would tell Clint. Besides, Clint hasn't been in the Tower in a while. He was still busy cleaning up the mess that she had made with the Winter Soldier. Once she was placed in therapy, which Clint had attended with her, in order to find the memories that Natalia - under the Winter Soldier's programming - had done, Clint had made it a point to undo all of what the man had set in plan.

One of them was to find the specialized explosives in every corner of the hellicarrier and any base which Natasha had been to in the year that the Winter Soldier had been back. It was a tedious job and last she heard, Clint had volunteered for it.

"He came back three days ago," Pepper informed Natasha with a slight frown. "He's cooking this morning's breakfast."

Natasha nodded, pushing the hurt in the back of her mind. She shouldn't be feeling like that. It didn't matter that she, in her crazed state, had told Clint that she loved him and he didn't respond. It didn't matter that he never even brought up the subject again even after he was done with his pseudo interrogation, brushed it off like she commonly said things like that. It didn't matter that it took her almost dying and the death of her first love that made her realize that she does love Clint. As an adult; knowing his imperfections and weaknesses, she loved him.

It didn't matter that he didn't love her back.

Or it shouldn't, but it did.

There was a loud noise, a glass shattering,

then shouting from the men in the living room that made her and Pepper raise their eyebrows looking at the direction where the noise had come from.

"Anthony Stark!" Pepper bellowed from her seat.

"It wasn't me!" Tony exclaimed from the living room.

"You better get over here, now, Tony."

"Red! You came out of your web!" Tony exclaimed walking into the room with a smile on his face heading straight for Pepper and dropping a kiss on her forehead.

Natasha watched as the two interacted. Where Pepper was berating Tony for doing something or another and Tony looking like a little boy as he apologized to Pepper. She watched as Pepper forgave Tony rolling her eyes as Tony promised to never ever do it again, both knowing that he would.

She stood up from her seat and walked to the direction of her teammates to check the damage of whatever had happened, but also to get away from the two lovebirds who reminded her of what she couldn't have.

"Lady Natasha!" Thor greeted her. He was back from Asgard for a few weeks because it was Jane's birthday. Since Earth days were exponentially faster than Asgardian days, he was able to spend more time on Earth than he had first anticipated without causing an uprising in Asgard.

"Hi Thor," Natasha greeted him with a smile.

"How are you healing?" Bruce asked Natasha. Like Tony had mentioned, she hadn't been out of her floor to see the others.

"Good," Natasha replied with a small smile.

Bruce's eyes focused on her. "How are you holding up?"

Holding up?

Her face must have shown her hint of confusion.

"I know what it is like to love someone so...unjust," Thor stated talking about Loki. "I am just happy my brother has chosen to seek help. I am sorry about your loss."

Natasha nodded her head, speechless. She hasn't even thought of Bucky in the last couple of days. The person who invaded her mind and made her want to go to the gym to punch the living daylight out of a punching bag was Clint Barton and his nonchalant attitude that he's taken with her.

Natasha met Steve's eyes from across the room. He's been quieter than usual since his resurrection to Captain America after Bucky had injected the anti-serum in his system.

"You doing alright Cap?"

"I'm gettin there," Steve answered her. "Thank you for asking."

Natasha stood there awkwardly as Thor went back into being mesmerized by the magical box, Steve went back to his Sudoku and Bruce went back to science. She contemplated going up to her room or the rooftop for a moment but she found herself in the kitchen door watching as Clint flipped the chocolate chip pancake - because the team would not let him make anything else - in tune with some 80s rock song. She leaned against the door to watch him move around the kitchen. He was a great cook, and looked right at home in any kitchen she had ever seen him in whether it was surrounded by old pots and pans in a small cottage in the woods or Starks' state of the art kitchen complete with every utensil and kitchen tool he could ever want.

Clint turned to the plate and placed the pancakes there when he noticed the red at the corner of his eye.

"Hey Natasha," Clint greeted her with a smile. "How have you been?"

"Good," Natasha replied curtly. "How was your mission?"

"Broke in my new partner," Clint stated, "it was good."

"New partner?"

"Well uhm, since you were assigned to be partners with the - since we weren't partners anymore, Hill got Bobbi to come back and be my partner."

Oh, Bobbi.

"That's... good," Natasha replied with a tight smile. Bobbi, as all of SHIELD knew, was Clint's wife at some point. The thought of them being partner together, working long hours of surveillance on the rooftops made Natasha's heart clench. Her chances with Clint were getting small and smaller. "How is Bobbi?"

"Bobbi's Bobbi," Clint replied evasively.

"Right uhm," Natasha mumbled. "Glad you're back."

Clint turned to face her as he dished out another pancake on the sixth plate. He always made enough for them to have six pancakes each. Clint looked at Natasha and sensed her sadness. "Natasha, I'm sorry."

Natasha turned around from the door to face him. She could feel the bile rising in her throat. "You don't have anything to apologize for, Clint. You don't feel that way for me, I'm learning to accept it."

Clint's eyebrows were knitted in confusion as he walked to her side putting down the spatula, wiping his hands on his apron that read "I'm the Boss... at least in the Kitchen." She had given him that apron once a long time ago.

"What are you talking about Natasha?" Clint asked as he approached her walking into her personal space.

"I... I told you that I..." Natasha paused taking in a shaky breath. She didn't want to have to say it again. She felt stupid enough for saying it the first time and now it was like he was cornering her to say it again.

"That you loved him," Clint finished for her. "I don't know what you were getting at before, if you're talking about being my partner. It wasn't my decision to get Bobbi as my partner."

"Clint -"

"You knew that I had feelings for you. Before all of this started, before Barnes ever laid his sorry ass up here and found you again. I'm not sorry I killed him. I'm sorry I took your once chance at being happy away from you. If I could make it up to you somehow I would, but I'm not going to apologize for killing him. Not after what he had done to Steve. Not after what he had done to you."

Natasha shook her head. "When I was getting medevac'd... When I looked at you and I told you that I loved you... you think I was... what? Hallucinating?"

"I know you loved him, Natasha. You said so yourself when we were in Hong Kong," Clint replied. "I know you were talking to him before you passed out in 'Nam. You don't have to explain; I got it a long time ago. I just didn't want to acknowledge it, not until I had a choice."

Natasha shook her head, "I love you Clint."

"No, Natasha," Clint protested shaking his head grabbing her face between his hands forcing her to look at him. "You don't love me. You don't get to do this, not when I'm almost out of your web. I refuse to get spun back in."

She looked at him bewildered. He thought she was just playing him? How could he think that after all they've been through and after her profession of love?

"Look, I'm grateful. For what you did when you jumped in front of that bullet for me. But you don't have to pretend, not with me," Clint stepped away from her and to the cooling pancakes. "You should probably go get the guys to the table. Breakfast is ready."

Natasha nodded at him before walking to the door.

"Clint?"

"Not now, Natasha," Clint stated. "We've said all we needed to. We should stop while we can still be friends."

The team was gathered at breakfast and enjoyed Clint's pancakes as they usually do with the assortment of syrups and toppings that Clint had cut up and placed on the table.

"Friend Clint," Thor started as he chewed on a folded up pancake. Natasha may not have eaten six pancakes but Thor takes the rest of the four skillet sized pancakes that she doesn't eat.

"Yeah, buddy?"

"Where is Lady Natalie? I have not seen her in a long time."

The attention of everyone at the table snapped to Clint. Until the mission with Natasha, each Avenger had seen Clint with his new blonde girlfriend frequently. Though they all knew that it was in part done to get back at Natasha, the team had thought that Clint was actually moving on.

"She's uh... we decided to go our separate ways," Clint stated stuffing a pancake in his mouth and reverting his attention elsewhere besides meeting his teammates eyes.

"That is unfortunate," Thor replied patting the smaller man on his shoulder. "Perhaps there is someone in the universe better suited for you."

The table's eyes snapped to Natasha who continued chewing on her pancake, trying to suppress the anger that bubbled in her. She knew that Thor didn't mean to single her out like that, but regardless of what he meant to do, the attention of the table was now on her and Clint.

"Nah, I'm gonna pass," Clint stated meeting Thor's eye and clapping his hand on the bigger man's shoulder before turning his attention to his pancake.

"You do not want to have a spouse? A family?" Thor questioned his friend. He was still trying to understand Midguardian society. In Asgard, it was required for people to be married and have a family. There were very little people who were an exception to that rule.

"Not in the cards for me, buddy."

"I wouldn't give up hope," Tony stated, the team not missing his side glance to Natasha. "I mean if I can get this beautiful woman to finally admit her love for me, you can too - I mean who wouldn't fall for me thought."

Pepper rolled her eyes, "You're still not forgiven for breaking the vase."

"But moooom," Tony whined. And just like that, breakfast was all jabs and teasing not directed at the two assassins.

Natasha walked around the common area kitchen looking for something to do. It had become somewhat of a habit since being stuck at the Tower with nothing else to do. She learned how to bake, and although it was only Thor who ate whatever she produced out of the oven, it made her feel accomplished. She was getting better at cooking meals as well that the Avengers were letting her cook dinner the night after to demonstrate what she learned in her past time.

In reality, Natasha was just trying. She was trying to be the woman that she thought Clint deserved, the one he wanted. She always figured he would want someone to cook for him, an American who would laugh at his jokes and listen to the twang of country songs that she found irritating. She was trying anything to make herself feel better. But at the end of the day, it seemed that Clint wasn't paying attention to what she did.

"Hey Red! What you doin' up?" Tony Stark walked in the kitchen, Led Zepplin t-shirt and all.

"Should ask you the same thing," Natasha replied taking out a bowl, flour, eggs and sugar from the cupboard and placing it on the table. Tony just sat at the stool and watched. "I'm going to try this… 'Better than Sex' cake recipe I saw online the other day."

Tony chuckled. "You're turning into a regular Martha Stewart in the kitchen… except she actually knew how to cook. And besides, you not getting any, Red? I'm sure you can walk down the street and have your pickings. Men fall all over your feet."

Natasha shot him a glare before taking out the measuring cups and placing her Stark Pad on the stand to read the recipe. She started at the recipe longer than necessary trying to bottle in the emotions inside of her.

You're getting weak, Natalia. She heard Bucky's voice in her head. When did she become someone who felt ashamed. Someone who can get a stranger in the street to fall in love with her, but once they knew her, the real her… Well.

Natasha shook her head from her thoughts and focused back on the eerily silent man before her.

"Pepper having late night cravings?"

Tony shot her a look and shook his head. "Thank God, no. I think it's too early for that."

"Too excited to sleep then?"

Tony nodded his head. "I'm gonna be a dad."

Natasha smiled at him. "You are. You scared you're gonna fuck it up, Stark?"

He shrugged before tentatively nodding his head. "I wanna be a better dad than my dad was. I mean really that's not setting the bar real high, but I wanna be there for him you know?"

It was her turn to shrug as she cracked a few eggs in the bowl. "I don't."

"Right, you never had parents, did you?"

"I must have, once."

"Is that why you don't know how to do the whole feelings thing?" Tony asked her, resting his chin against his hands. "I mean the last guy you loved was killed by the guy you tried to kill… Man if I have a daughter, remind me to not let her grow up to be like you."

Natasha knew Tony didn't mean it offensively. That it was true, nobody should grow up like her. Forced to kill at age ten and taught a million different ways to kill, seduce and maim a person. It was true that she had a specific skill set that set her apart from the rest of the population, that the media had labeled "cool," but if given the choice, Natasha Romanoff would have wished to grow up like the rest of the world.

Maybe then she would have a chance.

He looked at her as if he was studying her. Like she was another experiment of his in the lab. It irked her.

"Why did you do it?" Tony asked her.

"Do what?"

"Poison the vent system in Clint's garage," he clarified watching her every move. She stalled as she hit the egg on the edge of the bowl before cracking it completely, shells and all inside the bowl. She slammed her hand against the counter, gathered the bowl and dumped the contents in the trash determined to start all over.

"C'mon, Red. Just between you and me," Tony badgered. "You hate him that much? Hate that he made you into this… human being with feelings? C'mon."

Natasha shook her head and muttered, "I didn't know."

"What?"

"When Bucky reprogrammed me, I have no recollection of what I did, or what I was doing," she replied. "Natalia Romanova's memories aren't stored where Natasha Romanoff's memories are stored. The Red Room they… I don't know. They did things and I didn't… I wouldn't kill Clint. I would die before I would let anything happen to him."

"You love him," Tony stated simply. He was looking at Natasha like he figured out the secret that would explain and prove Quantum Physics – which the man probably has but refuses to share to the world.

"It doesn't matter," she replied, going back to the ritual of breaking the eggs into the bowl.

"That man is head over heels in love with you. It's not that complicated. You two should be together."

Natasha shook her head chuckling a little. For a genius, Stark could be so stupid. It was complicated. The thing with her and Clint. Complicated because they were partners, because he knew her inside out, because they both work for SHIELD and while there are ways around fraternization rules (agents can marry, not date each other), it still wasn't worth the risk. And oh, the one fact that complicated everything.

He doesn't feel the same.

"It's not that simple."

"It is, only if you make it."

"What is with you and all this deep wisdom tonight?" she asked him. This Stark she could handle. He was mellower, understanding even. It was a refreshing change from the egotistic, masochist who she had worked for almost four years ago.

"I'm trying to practice being a dad," he replied shooting her a grin. "I figured, who better to practice on than the girl who never had parents. That way you don't really have high standards or expectations. Kids never know what great parenting is until they grow up, you know? When they start comparing their lives to the kids around them," Tony paused, a wistful look on his face that she didn't think she would ever see on him. "When those kids talk about their lives, their parents … I want my kid to have the best life. The best parents. Best everything. I know Pepper's gonna be the best mom. I just want to be the best dad."

Natasha smiled at him, turning to the bowl in front of her and whisking the contents together.

"As your pseudo –father of the night. I'm gonna give you fatherly advice."

She groaned.

"Tell him."

"Tell who, what?"

"Tell Barton you love him."

"He won't believe me."

"It doesn't matter," he stated. "Keep telling him until he does."

Natasha looked at him wearily. "How would you know?"

"I know why you started baking. Why you stocked up on Tim McGraw, Johnny Cash, AC/DC and Queen… I know why he broke up with Natalie – that blonde high school teacher. I watched the footage from 'Nam. I know."

Tony stood up from his chair. "I gotta go down to the lab and grab something for Pep. Wish me luck… wait I won't need it. Woman's head over heels for me."

Natasha shook her head.

"I mean who wouldn't be?" he smirked as he left and headed towards the elevator.

It was past four in the morning when Natasha was able to gather her courage and decide which route to take in her life. She found Clint at the rooftop overlooking New York City.

"Hey, Natasha," Clint greeted her when he sensed her presence in the room. Regardless of how quiet her footfalls were, he always knew where she was.

Удачи!

To both of us.

Natasha hesitated at the door before making up her mind and standing at the edge of the small square rooftop next to Clint.

Clint watched Natasha's face lit up by the New York City lights.

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm sorry about... that you think... whatever I made you think..." Natasha paused to gather her thoughts. She let out a breath before continuing. "I know you don't- won't- believe me, and you don't have to. I just wanted to set the record straight."

Clint started at her as she stopped talking and looked at the people below her.

"I love you," Natasha stated. "I know I was confused, and I know I've never showed it but I do."

Clint took her hand and pulled her down to sit next to him. She leaned against him, a position they were familiar with.

"I know I'm too late," Natasha whispered to her neck. "I just wanted to let you know, it's you. It's always been you. I've just been... I didn't know the difference, and when Bucky showed up I was just... I was confused. I get it now; I'm just… I'm sorry I'm too late. "

Clint looked down at her, lifting her face at level to his. He gave her a grin, the one she loved with a twinkle in his eyes.

Then Clint's lips touched hers, and it was as if the past few months - Bucky appearing, Vietnam, the reprogramming - didn't happen. That her past as Natalia Romanova, cold blooded killer, the greatest operative the Red Room has created was gone.

In that moment, Natasha felt like Natasha.

Thanks for reading! I hope you guys enjoyed the story!

Like I said, not sure if an epilogue is in store with my schedule for the next couple of weeks, but if you guys deem it necessary I'll try to squeeze in writing one!

Comments and Criticisms, welcome!