I had this idea today, and decided to put it on paper.

Oneshot. Summary: Navi gives Link some advice that is more useless than usual...

"Navi!" Link shouted between grunts. "For the love of Din, tell me how to kill this thing!"

The boy was battling a fierce creature he had never seen before. But Navi had seen it in one place, and after recalling it, answered.

"Hey, first hold down your Z button!" she shouted. The boy stopped for a moment to look at his tunic.

"My clothes don't have buttons!" Link yelled back.

Navi gasped as the monster growled and reared back.

"Move the Analog Stick forward and press A! Then hold down Z and quickly press B!"

"Move Anna-what?"

The monster lunged out at Link.

"Watch out! Press R!" Navi shrieked.

Link cried out as he got bitten by the monster. Navi looked at Link's heart containers at the top of the screen.

"Listen, it's okay! You only lost 2 hearts!" she said encouragingly.

"What are you talking about?" Link said, bashing the creature with his shield.

"Look, Link, there's no time for playing with it! Hold down L and A, and finish it!"

"Look, Navi, your advice is worth less than dirt! Din's Fire!" He summoned the last of his magic, and fire erupted around him. The monster shrieked and disappeared into smoke, leaving behind a few green rupees.

"Navi, I don't get you," Link said, shaking his head as he shoved the rupees in his wallet. "Maybe I should've asked the Great Deku Tree for a more helpful fairy, like Saria's. Do us all a favor, and go to the dark side and give Ganondorf some of that advice!"

Navi's wings drooped. "But Link, I was only-"

"You were only trying to help? Right."

"No! I was only reading what the book said!"

Link stopped. "What book has all those crazy ideas in it?"

Navi mumbled something incomprehensible.

"What?" said Link.

"I found it from the Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time Video Game Strategy Guide."

Link, don't be mean!

This is really, really stupid. Hope it entertained you for the 30 seconds it took to read!