Title: Swimming Pools

Warning: G!P, child molestation

Song by: Kendrick Lamar, Swimming Pools

Authors note: it's not extremely graphic, but if you don't like the storyline don't read. If your going to leave a review please be respectful.

Swimming Pools

We all have 'that' Uncle, he's cool, fun, give you candy after mom says no, wrestles, gives horse back rides. Yeah he's 'that' Uncle. He's also 'that' Uncle you shouldn't be left alone with. And that's the biggest mistake Maribel and David made.

Your parents had to work and your older brother Carlos was away with the neighbors on a fishing trip. You loved Uncle Ray, he was the coolest guy in the world; second to your dad.

He sits little you on his lap and flicks on the cartoons, you watch Rugrats, Doug and Hey Arnold for hours. You have lunch, ice cream, wrestle, play video games and eat loads of candy. Then you accidentally wets your pants running to the bathroom. Uncle Ray tells you it's okay, and places you in the tub.

He leaves you alone until you scream out 'finished'. Uncle Ray always told you, you were his favorite because you were 'special' since you were the only girl in her family born with a penis, that's why you were 'special'.

You were in your bedroom getting dressed when he walked in, he helped you lotion, and put on her clean clothes. You two go downstairs and continued playing, you fall asleep on the couch, when you wake your laying in your bed and Uncle Ray is stroking your hair softly.

"You know your my favorite girl in the world?"

You wrapped your little chubby arms around his uncles neck and kiss his cheek. Uncle Ray climbs into bed with you and tells you something.

"Santana this is going to be our 'special time'" he called it "So you can't tell anyone, we don't want them to be mad because they didn't get a special time. Okay?"

You nod your head and close your eyes as tight as you can when Uncle Ray touches you in your private areas. It felt like a life time before the pain was over. Uncle Ray kissed your head when he was finished and made you pinky promise you wouldn't tell.

Pour up, drank, head shot, drank
Sit down, drank, stand up, drank
Pass out, drank, wake up, drank
Faded, drank, faded, drank

Your eight when your dad finds you in the bathroom crying one night he becomes worried.

"What's wrong?" he asked "What are you scared of?" you say nothing. David huffs "Baby, I can't help you if you keep things from me." you stay quiet and he "I still love you. Even though you won't tell papi what's wrong." he kisses your head and leaves.

Uncle Ray comes over and babysits you everyday for the next three weeks and you continue having your 'special time'. Only nights you can get away is when Carlos let's you sleep with him, and that stops after a few nights because you kept wetting his bed. Those three nights were the only nights you didn't have to endure the pain, the betrayal, the hurt, the discomfort, the violation.

For your tenth birthday your parents throw you a huge party. You have a moon bounce, face painting, clowns, horse-back riding, it's everything you could imagine. All of your friends from school come over, you beg Quinn and Kurt to stay the night and eventually they do. You sit up with them and talk about everything good in the world, rainbows, sunshines, shooting stars, middle school, cute boys and girls. Tonights the only night you feel free, tonight you don't feel like a victim in your own home.

Some people like the way it feels
Some people wanna kill their sorrows
Some people wanna fit in with the popular
That was my was my problem
I was in a dark room

Summer before ninth grade you pray and ask God to send you an angel. The next morning you see the Uhal truck across the street, it's a huge family there's four daughters and son and a fat cat. You watch outside the window as they unpack. The blonde with the blue eyes catch your eye. You smile at her and wave and she waves back. For two days you spied on the girl.

When Uncle Ray comes over your in the yard playing with Brittany. She's really touchy-feel-y something you have to get used too. Brittany hugs you goodbye and you see your uncle through the corner of your eye, he's not happy.

That night he bends you over and tears you a new one. You can barely sit for a week. Your mother notice somethings wrong when you start wetting the bed again, when it first started wetting yourself you were five after the first night you and Uncle Ray had 'special time'.

"Santana, are you having nightmares again?" your mother ask "Your father is really worried. I am too." she hands you the clean sheets and you storm off.

You go in your room and you find the bottle under your bed, you put it to your lips and you don't put it down again till it's empty.

The freedom is granted as soon as the damage of vodka arrives
This is how you capitalize
This is parental advice

October of freshman year you ask Brittany to be your girlfriend, she's say yes and you two start spending a lot of time together. You can see your uncle doesn't like that. Brittany is your angel she understands you, she loves you, she keeps you safe.

"Santana," she whispers "Do you ever think about sex?"

Your heart starts to pound you know what sex is but the only kind of sex you've ever had is the kind you were forced too. "I only think about sex with you." that's true, you think about everything with Brittany. "Do you want to have sex?"

Brittany blushes and it makes you blush too.

"Of course I want to have sex I just don't know when." she pauses "I only want to have sex with you. Well I want us to be each others first."

You wrap your arms around her tighter. You wish Brittany could have been your first everything, but you prayed for this blessing a few years to late. Just like most nights you go home and you pull a bottle for either the closet, under your bed, the dirty clothes hamper, your dresser or your sports duffle.

Why you babysittin' 2 or 3 shots?
I'ma show you how to turn it up a notch
First you get a pool full of liquor, and you dive in it
Pool full of liquor, and you dive in it

You and Brittany have to make a big decision, wether it will make or break your relationship.

"So I was thinking..." she sang "That on Friday we should you know..." she paused "After the game."

Friday was you're one year anniversary. You guys had been getting hot and heavy for the past few months, over the summer you guys nearly had sex but you chickened out and suggested that you guys wait.

Uncle Ray hasn't been around in a few weeks, it makes you happy. Your finally living without fear. Things got worse when Carlos left for college, it happened more often, and was more violent. You were older, bigger, stronger, smarter and wiser; but on the inside you were still that little five year old girl, who had pinky promised you wouldn't tell.

You win your first varsity football game, and it feels great. You take picture for the newspaper talk to a few reporters, your happy. Your even happier when Brittany kisses you.

You've been in Brittany's room a billion times before, but tonight it feels like unfamiliar territory. You stare at her and she stares back, you laugh and she laughs, she kisses you and you kiss back, she undressed you, you undress her, she holds you, you hold her.

In this moment you feel love. You feel different, only form of sex you've ever none is 'special time'. The skin pressed against yours is soft and smooth. Brittany's lips are stuck between her teeth because she wants you in her so bad.

When you enter her she holds you tighter her nails dig into your skin and lips attach to yours. Your movements are sloppy at first, but soon you find a rhythm, the white headboard bangs against the wall every time you thrust inside her. She kisses all over your face, she holds you tight, her heels dig into your waist and her moans fill your ear.

"Harder." she moans "Please, go harder."

For a moment your not sure if you can go harder. You'd never think anyone would want to be hurt during sex. Your lips are attached to her neck while her head is thrown back deep into the pillows.

"Santana" she whines "Please, you feel so good inside of me." she say words you couldn't have imagined saying during 'special time'.

Brittany whips the sweat of your head and pushes your hair back. She smiles at you. "I love you." she says

"I love you too." you say.

You sit with your head on her chest for a few hours longer. You notice she's falling asleep. "Brittany, I have to go." she nods her head, you love the sleepy smile she's got on her face "I love you."

You gather your things and walk across the street. Your house is quiet, your parents are sleep, your brothers room is empty, you still like to mess with his things even though you know you shouldn't. All that fear that was once instilled in your heart, is gone when your with Brittany. When you walk into your room it grabs you and swallows you whole.

You go over to your closet and put your things away. You see the Jack Daniels bottle, it's talking to you it's saying things it shouldn't be. Your not listening to it, now it's screaming at you.

Okay, now open your mind up and listen to me
I'm your conscience, if you don't hear me you'll be history
I know that you're nauseous right now
And I'm hopin' to lead you to victory
If you take another on down
I'ma drown in this poison abusin' my limit
I think that I'm feelin' the vibe
I see the love in her eyes, I see the feelin'
The freedom is granted as soon as the damage of vodka arrive

You take the bottles and the other ones hidden all around your room and you empty them in the bathroom sink. You don't want to be a victim anymore you don't want to hurt anymore.

You sit up all night, and fall asleep once the sun starts to rise. You smell coffee and you know your father is up. You smell food and you know your mom is up also. Your feet touch the floor and it feels new, you feel different this was one of the first nights you'd gone to sleep sober since your fourteenth birthday.

After eleven years you finally decide to let this secret go. After all the pinky promises, and cartoon watching, horse back riding, ice cream eating and candy sneaking, you finally decide it's time to break this promise and set yourself free.

You walk downstairs and your moms siting at the table and your dad is across from her, he's drinking his coffee and your mom is reading the newspaper, she cuts out your article and smiles at you. You pull out a chair and you sit. Your dad looks at you funny, because you never spend Saturday's home your normally with Brittany. You fold your hands in your lap and you smile.

"Mom, dad..." you begin.

Pour up, drank, head shot, drank
Sit down, drank, stand up, drank
Pass out, drank, wake up, drank
Faded, drank, faded, drank

I've never really written a story like this before. I enjoyed writing it. I feel like there's someone in the world who can relate to this, maybe not the exact storyline but they may know what it feels like to be a victim of something.

I enjoyed writing this story.

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Luv Neko