A/N: Unbetated sorry for any mistakes. Thank you for all the comments. News on Alison will be revealed later on in the story. Stiles is actually studying more than one course but that will be revealed later. And as to Scott taking all the blame, well Stiles does have a larger part to play in their friendship ending. But that's all Spoilers.

It wasn't like he liked the kid; in fact Derek felt nothing for the 23 year old human male that had saved his life so many times that it actually hurt a little. In Derek's mind Stiles was foolish and childish and so full of pain he wanted to wrap him in something soft and tell him to stay inside. Stiles was fragile but in a human way, sure his bones could break and Derek was fully aware that Stiles had been hurt badly. There was something else though, something deep down below the layers of his skin and bone, below the muscles. Something inside Stiles that made Derek himself want to be better. That of course was years ago and those feelings had long since vanished, or so he thought.

Now he was standing outside of a rundown motel trying not to look too suspicious as he waited for Stiles to return. Naturally Derek had beaten him to it, and it wasn't just for the fact that he was a werewolf no he suspected that Stiles would be out for some time. He was correct of course; it was sometime around 9 at night that the younger human returned still looking worn and shaken. The werewolf wasn't really sure what had happened all those years ago all he knew was that Stiles had been injured and left shortly after. While his curiosity had eaten at him like a maggot eats at rotten food he had let everything be. Scott's personal business was not of his concern; at least it hadn't been back then. Now he wished he had picked at that spot and gone and asked what happened, maybe then Stiles would have stayed or at least parted on good terms with his friends.

Derek wasn't going to lie to himself, at the time Stiles hadn't really been his friend heck he wondered if any of them had been his friend. Now however was a different story: his pack was more than that now, they where his family. To say that Derek matured would be an understatement he did more than grow up, he took responsibility for his actions. Which is what he was trying to do now. So okay he wasn't really taking responsibility for anything he had done since you know he had nothing to do with what had happened but tomorrow was an important day and he would damned if anything screwed his plans up. it was hard enough making deals and getting outside werewolves to join let alone ones that seemed as shifting and alone as the ones that he was meeting tomorrow morning.

With a sigh, that actually sounded more like a groan but there was no one around to listen so the werewolf was more than happy to tell himself it was a sigh, he shifted off the side of the wall and walked towards the room. Inside he heard Stiles moving about cursing to himself, his erratic heart like a drum in his ears. Oh how he wanted to calm that heart, not in a calm-his-heart-forever kill kind of way, just settle him. It was strange for Derek. The unwanted emotions he wasn't aware he had, since when had he become protective over Stiles? The man had been gone for years and Derek wasn't exactly one to exchange emails and keep in touch.

Still he needed to know what had happened if not for his own damn curiosity then to help the pack tomorrow when they would be jumpy. The last thing he needed was his pack to be on an emotional rollercoaster when he was about to add 2 more members to it.

The knock on the door was quiet and quick, nothing that suggested he was angry. Still he was surprised when Stiles pulled the door open with such force he expected the younger man to charge at him like some bull. Taking a step back Derek held up his hands and gave a small smile. Yes Derek Hale did smile.

"I only come in peace"

The other male looked surprised but not so shocked, more like he was expecting someone else. Then his face twisted into something else that Derek was unable to read.

"I would say no but even I know that wouldn't stop you" Letting out a sigh Stiles stepped aside motioning for Derek to enter.

The face that Stiles was pulling made it clear to the werewolf that he didn't really want him there. He was unsure if it was just him or people in general, though curious he did nothing to voice his thoughts. Instead he took four long steps into the small motel room arms still up like he was defending himself. In fasciations he watched as Stiles closed the door and pulled the chain across before moving to the window, it was then that Derek noticed how the room was set up and the small can in Stiles's hand.

"No one followed me if that's what you are worried about, and I'm not here to harm you. Just to talk... you still talk right?

Stiles only sighed tossing the small can onto the table and watching it roll right near the edge. If he had to guess Derek would assume that the can was filled with Wolfsbane but he didn't really want to rest his theory. Instead he lowered his hands slowly stuffing them into the pockets of his coat and mindlessly fiddling with the keys in his right pocket.

"Yes I still talk, clearly as there are words coming out of my mouth. Though I assume when you say talk you mean discussing and by that I assume you mean long winded talks about feelings and what not... yes I still talk"

The corner of Derek's lips twitched happy to see that Stiles was still somewhat the same as he was before. Knowing it was his turn to talk Derek moved to sit in one of only two chairs removing his hands from his pockets to rest on his legs. For a second he contemplated going about his task in another way, maybe tricking the younger man. However Stiles was far too smart for that so instead Derek decided to hit the nail head on so to speak.

"I need- want to know what happened years ago"

"No" Was all Stiles said before moving to the bed across from Derek his eyes somewhat cold which made the werewolf pull back. He was used to seeing Stiles sad, happy, determined, and sometimes he had this annoying look in his eyes. Never had he seen the younger man look so cold and withdrawn. Yet another reason he wanted to protect him.

"Listen. Tomorrow we have new pack members joining and the last thing I need is my own pack nervous and going through some emotional stress... I know you don't want to but I think it's for the best if you get it of your chest"

Leaning back in his chair his green eyes hooked onto the boy the same way a worm is hooked onto a well hook. He watched the emotions dance across the boy's face and it was obvious that Stiles was having some inner war with himself.

"I thought Scott would have told you or someone else"

"Scott didn't tell me anything and I never asked... not until now that is"

Running a hand through his hair Stiles shifted on the bed obviously not comfortable with where the conversation was going. Derek wasn't surprised; he had refused to talk about his family for years after the fire. He could only imagine what Stiles was going through.

When he did speak however Derek was frozen in his spot his blood running cold.

"Do... do you know what it feels like to die. I mean actually die, all black and numbness. Do you?" His brown eyes met his and Derek was faintly aware that he was holding his own breath.

"No" he whispered but it came out more as a choke.

"I do, I know the feeling pretty well. Died 3 times actually"