Nothing.

That's all I can feel right now. Well, if you can even call that a feeling.

I don't even feel numb anymore. That sailed right out of the fucking door when Mr. Captain America himself said that he fucking hated my guts because I wasn't my father.

The fuck right?

I don't blame him. I really can't because I hate myself to and if there's one thing I hate in this world (besides myself), it's a hypocrite.

He's always been my hero. Funny, Iron Man's hero is Captain America. Ironic to say the least. You have complete and total mirror opposites trying to work together on the same team. Captain America is the symbol of patriotism and everything good in the world. Everybody loves him and it's near impossible to think of him as anything less than the savior of the planet. Then you have Iron Man is a person who is supposedly self-centered, a genius, and a generally snobby rich guy who loves the public eye.

But that's only part of the story.

Captain America is really just a jerk who thinks the world should go back to the way it was back in the 1940s. He doesn't respect or like anything he doesn't understand and practically refuses anything to do with technology. And he hates his best friend's son. Yep, you would think that he would like him, but apparently Tony is just so different from Howard that he shouldn't exist. That's who Steve Rogers is.

Iron Man is really just a man named Tony Stark. He's always felt that he was worthless and that anyone could do a better job in his place. He feels like shit most of the time. He has more self-destructive tendencies than the American flag has stars.

And he's a cutter.

Well, I'm a cutter, if I want to make this a more personal story.

I'm generally very good at hiding it.

Wearing gloves up to my elbows every time Bruce comes into the lab. Making sure to only wear long sleeves when I spar with Natasha. Keep wristbands on whenever I'm doing something with Clint. Making sure my arms are away from Thor as much as possible. And just flat out avoiding Rogers.

But sometimes, not even that can hide everything.

We're not part of the Avengers for nothing.

They notice the little things, like winces when I bend my wrist the wrong way. Or when I flinch away from one of their casual touches. How I can't always withstand a blow from one of them when I'm sparring.

Like I said, they're sharp. They pick up on these things.

But they don't know.

And they've never asked.

Why? That's really the only question that I've never been able to answer.

And it stabs me right in the chest like a mother-fucker and hurts like a bitch after it's gone.

They claim that they are my friends, but they never ask how I am. Or why I'm depressed.

Or anything really.

Well, now I'm done.

This is it and wow did I do a shitty job with my suicide note. Well, I'm definitely not one to make speeches, much less write a letter to whomever will find my poor, dilapidated body after I'm dead. Blame my own social shortcomings.

Not that I'll care after a few minutes.

Well…

Later,

Tony Stark

P.S. Cap, yes, I'm blaming you for a whole lot of shit. Just don't forget to share the blame with my parents.

…

"Tony." Natasha sobbed into Clint's shoulder after listening to Steve read the note they found in Tony's room.

And if Nat was sobbing, Clint was seething with rage. "This is all your fault, asshat!" He yelled at Steve, "If you had just told him that he wasn't a complete and total fucking failure, Tony might still be here right now!"

Steve was just staring at the arc reactor as it lay on Tony's desk, right in front of him. He didn't respond, couldn't for the most part. He just stared at the thing that had been responsible for the death of one of his teammates. And it was a death he could have easily prevented.

…

Here lies Tony Stark

Known to most of the world as the savior of the planet

As Iron Man

But known to a select few

The ones who he held close to his heart

As the man called Tony

A Genius, Billionaire, Playboy, and Philanthropist

…

A/N: Bloody hell, that was a really crappy story. Sorry if you expected better. I mean I swear I was writing this on crank or something.

I apologize,

Love,

Tainted Fated Demise