Liz sighed, rather dramatically, and dropped her shopping bags with a veritable clunk. "I seem to have come at a bad time, would you like me to return later?"

"Oh, for shit's sake yes." Ciel said point blank, already ushering her out the door.

"Too bad!" Liz took advantage of Ciel's closeness to press her lips to his in an unnecessarily (and just plain unnecessary) sloppy kiss.

Ciel resisted the urge to bleach his mouth (which he was now physically able to do without months of hospital recovery time and a severely damaged taste bud system) and instead settled for darting over to Sebastian and began rubbing his mouth furiously all over the side of Sebastian's arm.

Sebastian was too busy registering his disgust at what was happening and had already happened (eeeeew, girl cooties!) to try and shake Ciel off his arm.

"See, Ciel, that's exactly what you were missing by not kissing Lizzy every day of your... 'happily' married life." Liz grinned, and started digging through her shopping bags for God knows what next torture. A genuine reproduction of the meals Lizzy would have cooked?

"Please, please... no more!" Ciel said, still gagging a little on his own (and a little of Liz's) spit.

Liz looked up at him, a bit confused. "Huh? Oh, nothing more about Lizzy today. We-eell, that is, nothing but the bare basics. We need to talk about some things. I can't technically ruin Sebastian's life anymore because he really doesn't have one – see, he was stupid enough to forget it" - insert evil look at Sebastian, which is responded to with the expression translation of complete and utter speechlessness - "so now I just have to get his memories back and then destroy his life."

"But he was about to eat my soul!" Ciel wailed. He wasn't usually this whiny, he knew, somewhere deep inside. But... he was tired. So, so tired. And he hurt. He hurt like something was eating him from the inside, ripping him to shreds over and over as fast as he could heal for them to eat him again. He didn't taste that fucking good, did he?

Liz frowned, a little taken aback. She had been so busy scheming that she hadn't noticed Ciel's demand of Sebastian when she entered. "Well, too bad. He can eat it after he remembers everything. It won't hurt him at all if he eats you and he isn't in love with you."

Ciel blanked.

Then he exploded, as he tended to do when faced with something true that he: A. was simply not prepared emotionally/physically to deal with or B. did not like.

Of course, if this had been a literal explosion, the story might have ended here, or even become far more interesting as Liz and Sebastian were left to figure out what the hell to do with themselves as they stayed in the living room of a long-ago condemned building's penthouse, covered in bits of flesh and bone and the occasional strand of hair that had once constituted Ciel Phantomhive.

However, despite that rather graphic description featured above, Ciel only exploded figuratively. "He doesn't love me! I'd know if he did, because he's such a perverted sex monster that he couldn't possibly dress me and undress me and give me baths without trying to rape me at least every other time, not to mention that time I was high and he just -"

Ciel cut himself short.

Liz wiggled her eyebrows. "Oooh, so even the great Earl Phantomhive has his vices."

"I am not a depraved drug add-"

Liz hushed Ciel, waving a finger in front of his lips threateningly. How, it was threatening, when he could bite it off with enough force to break his own jaw at the same time, he could not understand. But it was. "I believe we've heard enough out of you."

Sebastian coughed slightly. "For the record, I'm not a perverted sex monster."

That you remember. Ciel thought, rolling his eyes in Sebastian's general direction as he thought it as loudly as he could.

Yeah, well, YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE! a voice screamed in Ciel's head so loudly he thought it was God for a moment.

The smirk on Sebastian's face was just begging for corporal punishment.

But before Ciel could go slap Sebby (even at demon speed, yes) Liz was dumping things out of her bag and everyone in the room was entranced, even the person that nobody knew was there. (Shh.)

It looked like... like Liz was dumping out the makings of a romantic picnic onto the floor. Tall scented candles, matches, a red silk cloth, lube, edible – edible panties, and... the items just kept going, from depraved sexual toys to romantic.

"Uh, Liz, not that I don't like you and everything but-" Ciel said in a slightly strangled voice.

Liz snorted. "You're kidding me, right?" She hocked a ring box at Sebastian, who caught it with a slightly amused expression on his face. He opened it, and a slight 'wow' expression spread across his face. She snorted again. "And that ring there is kidding you. It's costume jewelry. Still cost me a pretty piece of credit though. Good thing it's returnable..."

Liz swept all the items aside and considered the chains bolted into the floor that she herself had been chained to just recently. "Those could come in handy, in theory, but... I somehow doubt it. Hey, Sebastian, could old rusty chains hold that grim reaper that mind fucked you?"

Sebastian, who had figured out what Liz was doing a while ago, shook his head. Liz sighed. She glanced up at Ciel's baffled face and sighed again. "Okay, so here's what we're gonna do. It's rather simple when you think about it. We're going to use the power of Sebastian's true name to summon Grell here, and we'll hold him with a magical circle made out of demon and death god repelling shit. Usually not much repels a death god, but there are... ways."

"Wait." said Ciel, who was getting a headache for the first time in what felt like forever. He was, well was supposedly, smarter than her. How was he not understanding this? "How is invoking Sebastian's true name going to bring Grell?"

Liz sighed. Again again. "Grell consumed quite a bit of Sebastian's Cinematic Record. A Cinematic Record is not just your memories, it's tied up very closely with your soul. So when Grell got Sebastian's Cinematic Record, he also got a lot of his soul as well. Sebastian probably has less of a soul than he did even before." Liz flashed a smile at Sebastian, as if to say, 'no offense'. "I know it might be difficult to grasp the concept of demons having souls, but most demons began as humans. The demons who didn't don't even have the need to consume souls, really, it's more like a hobby."

Ciel gripped his forehead. Ow...

"A demon, for whatever reason, with their demon powers and shit inherit a really long and complicated and unusually hard to pronounce name. Since you inherit supernatural forces of darkness or whatever, you should also inherit a couple of weaknesses, I suppose. Like the fact that you get a name that, if anyone discovers it, can yank you around for eternity."

"Wait. Wait, wait, wait." Ciel said, grasping the pulse in his temples. Was he seriously getting a migraine? "Why don't I know mine?"

"It probably comes when you actually start eating souls and acting like an actual demon instead of sitting around in your jammies all day with ridiculously long hair watching TV." Liz contemplated.

Ciel opened his mouth to argue, but no good retort came to mind, so he shut his cake hole.

Somewhere behind him, Sebastian snickered.

"So, how are we gonna do this?" Ciel said, trying to ignore the growing paranoia that someone was in the room. Well, lots of people were in the room. Just, someone that – oh, you know what his paranoia is referring to.

Liz grinned. "That's the fun part. We make it look like Sebastian enjoyed being raped the first time so much that he set up a sex picnic for Grell..." She whipped up the huge red cloth. "While under this red cloth is a magic circle, much like a force field in those super old Star Wars movies, that won't even let oxygen get through."

Ciel blinked. Impressive. "I think the force fields in Star Wars let oxygen through. Sometimes."

Liz frowned at him. "I'm not going to argue about fictional physics with you when I have such a fucking brilliant plan. Now, lets set to drawing the black magic and holy symbols on the floor."

"Holy symbols?" Ciel questioned.

"Duh." Liz said, grabbing plain white chalk off the floor from where it had been dumped with the other, less innocent items. "We need black magic to call him, but holy symbols to trap him. Not all of life is as white and black as your church and Queen would have you believe."

Ciel grimaced, the image of his parents, 'together' for eternity flashing through his head as he answered. "If there is one thing I know, it is that the Queen is often far closer to black than the white the church would have us believe."

AN: Hola~ yes, this did take me forever to put out, I do realize that. But I think I may be able to wrap it up in one or two more chapters and finally work on something else. I put out a one shot Vampire Knight that was sort of stupid... * rolls eyes at self * but I was bored and trying to write something at least. And that was when the ideas for this chapter clicked in my head.

I got permission from the wonderful ~yaoichia of deviantart to use her art for my cover photo of this story. I am so honored to have such a wonderful artist allow me to use her work.