"She always fucking does this," I muttered to myself as I thought of why I was there. I was sitting alone in her room waiting for her to get home from her date with Lindsey for the third time this week. She always left me waiting up for her. Every fucking time. The worst part was, she was with HER. The one person who was stopping me from being with the love of my life. Tegan kept saying that she would break up with her soon, but soon never seemed to come soon enough.

As soon as I heard the clicking of the door with a giggly goodbye, I became enraged. I could see why it was hard to break up- they were together for a long time after all- but she said she loved me. She was in love with me. Not her. It pissed me off to hear her having a good time with my competition while I was sitting alone in absolute misery. Sure, I got to be with Tegan sometimes in private, but I was tired of being her dirty little secret. Tegan was fucking mine. No more sharing.

"Hey Sar-"

"Shut the fuck up," I interrupted her. I had finally lost my patience.

"Sara, I was just gonna say I love you."

"I said shut your fucking mouth!" I approached her, months of seething rage bubbling up to the surface. It was finally going to come out, and it was going to come out now.

"But-"

Before she could utter one more syllable, I pinned her against the wall with great force. I was breathing heavily and I could feel our chests pressing together every time I tried to inhale as much air as I could. Deciding that I really did not care anymore, I began to vent my frustrations without any sense of control at all.

"Just fuck you, Tegan. FUCK YOU. I love you. You love me. Why the fuck can't you just break up with her already? You say that you're mine, but you still sleep with her! She's the one who gets to love you openly and call you her girlfriend. She's the one who gets you in person whenever she wants. And she's the one who gets to make love to you. I have to use Skype to even see you nowadays! I love you so much Tegan, but I can't take this anymore. You're killing me from the inside out. Make your fucking choice now. The rant is over. I can't do this anymore. Fucking choose."

I knew I was being irrational and ridiculous, but I couldn't stop myself. It was now or never. I lifted one of my thighs between her legs and pushed inwards. I could feel her tense, and then relax into me, but that was not what I wanted. I needed to move on one way or the other.

"S-Sara, I need time to think. I don't know what to do."

"Yeah, you've been saying that for seven months now. I'm done. Choose."

"I don't even get five minutes to collect my thoughts? Sara, I love you, but please. Just give me a sec here."

I didn't let her respond. In fact, I didn't let her do anything after that. I made the choice for her. If she wasn't going to do this the easy way, I'd make it clear to her the only way I knew how. I would take her. She had been mine emotionally for a long time, but tonight she would be mine for real.

I repeated one more "Fuck you, Tegan."

With those simple words, I began to let myself go for the first time. No more half-assed attempts at being calm. I started to unbutton her shirt, no doubt bought in the presence of HER. Tegan was dressing herself to please HER. Fuck HER. I ripped the remaining buttons from the fabric, not caring that I ruined an expensive shirt. I heard Tegan gasp a couple of times, but I liked it more than I should have. Sure it was hot, but I was happy that she was scared. I was scared all the fucking time because of her.

I continued my welcome assault of her body, roughly kissing up and around her neck. She shifted her body, but I knew she wasn't resisting. She wanted me as badly as I wanted her. She just apparently needed a kick in the ass to get things going. After I finished bruising her neck with my kisses, I unhooked her bra and threw it across the room. I looked at her directly in the eye, probably with a disturbingly possessive look on my face.

"Mine," I said looking at her chest. She looked at me with slight confusion. Seriously, Tegan? I didn't mean your boobs, you horndog. I put my hand to her chest making myself more clear, feeling her rapidly beating heart.

"Mine," I repeated with a snarl.

I suddenly brought my lips to hers in a dominating kiss. I'd show her who she belonged with. We were meant to be together. Fuck everybody else. I showed her as best I could, forcing my tongue in, but putting as much love as I could into it. I was mad but I still loved her. I still had to be somewhat tender. She softened me up. She was my Tegan.

After I was satisfied with her desperate moaning, I slapped her across the cheek. It wasn't too hard, but it had a purpose.

"Who do you belong to?" I asked her.

"You," she quietly groaned. I needed more.

"Who the fuck do you want to be with?"

"You."

"WHO, TEGAN?!" I needed to hear it with more certainty in her voice.

"You, Sara. I'm in love with you."

"Christ, was that so hard? Now show me."

To my delight, she quickly removed her pants and pulled my t-shirt over my head. I wasn't going to let her take control, but I did like her initiative. I grabbed her by the tie she was still wearing around her neck and dragged her to the bed. With her sprawled awkwardly in front of me, I pointed to her underwear. She removed them immediately, understanding my signal.

"Good," I said to her. "Now touch yourself. Say my name and touch yourself."

She looked at me hesitantly but she knew that I meant business. One stern gaze her way, and she obeyed. I watched her as I slowly took off my own clothes. She seemed to do a goddamn good job with herself and was distracting me. I almost tripped over my pyjamas when she made a particularly delicious sound, but I managed to stay upright. Regaining my composure, I moved forward and straddled her. She was lightly panting and her eyes were black. As I thought, she did do a fucking good job.

Convinced that I had made myself clear by now, I let myself be a bit softer with her. I tenderly kissed her lips and swept her bangs out of her face. She was so gorgeous. I never understood why she faked narcissism to deflect the compliment when people called her hot. She really was. Her bone structure mixed with the dim lighting casted the most beautiful shadows on her toned body. I never really paid attention to how muscular her body had become. Clearly, her arms were more defined, but this was the first time I got a good look at the rest of her.

She noticed that I stopped to stare and I detected a faint blush across her cheeks. God, I loved her. That didn't mean I was going to hold back though. I bit her nipples, loving every squeak she made when I went too hard. With her head laid back and her eyes closed, I slapped her boobs a couple of times to catch her attention. When she looked me in the eye, I continued. I needed her to know that it was me she was with.

Wasting no more time, I slid my hand down between our entangled legs and started rubbing. I felt her hips jerk forward, so I increased the pressure. I smacked my hips against hers to gain even more momentum. I decided to kiss along her upper body and rub my free hand across her shoulders to feel as much of her as I possibly could. She was starting to get restless under me. It was taking way too much energy to keep myself balanced over her as I fingered her relentlessly.

Sensing her need, I lowered myself, kissing along her abdomen. I would sometimes suck unnecessarily hard so that I could mark her as mine. She apparently really liked it when I licked right above her pubic bone so I did so freely. I would scratch along the same area, soothing the pain with my tongue afterwards. She didn't seem to mind. I could smell how ready she was to have me finish her off, but I wanted to tease her. She fucking teased me for months. Even if it was only for two minutes, I wanted her to be the one to beg for me.

"Sara, please."

"Please what? Tegan, you need to tell me."

"Please. Touch me, please."

"Why should I? Do you choose me then?"

"Yes Sara, please!"

"Fine then."

Hearing those words lifted the weight of the world off of my shoulders. Of course I'd never tell Tegan that, but it was a huge relief. Even if she was desperate. She chose me. That was all I needed.

I swiftly brought my mouth down to taste her, nipping at the skin around my target. My nails dug into her ass to bring her closer to my face. I had a feeling that she'd taste good, but I had no idea it'd be so delicious. It felt weird to describe it that way, but it was true. I could run my tongue along her for ages and never tire of it. With every gasp that came from her mouth, I was spurred on further. I made sure to lick her thoroughly, leaving no stone unturned. I wanted her to remember me everywhere. Feel me everywhere. Be mine completely.

Adding a couple of fingers to the mix, I started to prepare her for release. I roughly thrusted into her, making sure that she would not forget this in the morning. She met my every movement to feel as much as she could. Her moans shortened with her breath and her body was shaking beneath my touch. I loved to hear my name spoken by her. It was a common enough name, but she made it special.

I felt her hands tangle in my hair and pull hard. I guessed that she was finally done with the teasing. I sped up and violently fucked her with all of my might. My nails scratched along her back as my grip slid downwards. She seemed to like it, so I dug in deeper. I took note of what an impressive bottom she was. She could definitely take a lot more pain than I could. Maybe I just needed the right incentive.

She let out a loud grunt and then sucked in as much air as she could. Her body began to tense and clench, and then she met her release. The look on her face made me tear up a bit. I finally had my Tegan. She was in ecstasy because of me. As she experienced bliss, I gently kissed around her mouth until she was able to kiss back. Things soon started to get heated again so I grabbed her wandering hands and brought them to rest on my shoulders.

"No," I said. "It's about you. My Sasa. Mine."

She smiled at me with genuine love shining though, without guilt for the first time. I was done being jealous and she knew it. It made us both happy. We were free to cuddle without carefully monitoring where our hands were placed. I rested my arm across her waist and pulled her close to me. I could tell she wasn't kidding when she shared her love of spooning with the world. She was a pro. I didn't mind it as much as I had previously let on.

Looking back on our first night together makes me warmly smile at how far we've come as a couple. Unfortunately, Tegan has to stay late due to a collaboration project she's working on, but it's our third anniversary tonight and I plan to propose. I know we can't really get married, but she's a sucker for a romantic gesture. I never thought I'd want to marry anyone after my relationship with Emy failed so miserably, so the fact that I even want to try with Tegan means a lot to me.

Leaving my beautifully set up spread, I hide in our bedroom closet, waiting for her arrival. I can't wait to see her read the card and jump into my arms. She can't say no to her favourite photo of us, three dozen red roses, a non-conventional, very "Tegan" ring, with a plain white card to do the deed. Tegan is such a hopeless romantic. It's cute, but the sappiness the she gets out of me often embarrasses me. Using the word that has become her term of affection, I simply wrote: "Mine. Prove it?"