Disclaimer: Don't own, but all hail Joss Whedon
This was supposed to be my moment.
The one where I was finally the one to succeed. The one where father would be proud of me, not that bumbling buffoon Thor.
But of course not.
Because my oh so perfect brother had to join the Avengers and help to defeat me and my army of Chitauri soldiers. My plans, my hopes, my dreams, oh how I wish they meant something to someone other than me. That someone cared enough to come and ask me how I was, instead of laughing in my face when something went wrong.
Is it wrong to ask for any little show of affection? A pat on the head. A hand on my shoulder. A kind word here and there instead of the almost constant ridicule and verbal abuse.
Father, why?
Why didn't you just love me as much as you loved Thor? You told me not to act like a child, but what if it's a father I need. I've never needed the All-Father. I just needed my father. Someone to pick me up when I fell down, someone to give help when I needed it.
Was I so embarrassing you had to publically rant at?
Was I so pathetic, you felt you had to make me an outcast?
When did I stop being good enough?
Or was I ever good enough to begin with?
I don't think I know anymore.
All of these thoughts crossed my mind as I sat in my cell, pondering my fate. Would father really cut off my tongue this time? Would he take away my magick? Would he send me into the deepest pits of hell?
Would he, would he, would he?
All of a sudden, the door to the room holding my cage slammed open and revealed the entire Avengers team, including Nick Fury and a man who was supposed to be dead. I'd supposedly killed him myself.
"Hello, Loki." Thor said sadly, the only one who seemed to be willing to actually acknowledge my presence at all.
"Thor." I rasped voice hoarse with disuse.
"Brother you sound and look terrible." He gaped taking in my full appearance as I stood to unfold my long body.
"Thank you for that wondrous compliment, dear Thor." I snarled, turning to face away from the fools that locked me up in here in the first place.
"Loki, it's time for you to be shipped back to Asgard." Fury said, glancing at me as if my very being was cause enough to irritate him.
"Is it? Why, I must've lost track of the time." I rolled my eyes, still not turning back round to face them.
"We'll be waiting. Stark, you get to get the bloody prisoner ready for transport." He ordered, before all except the Ironman left the room.
"So, you are my new keeper, Stark?" I asked quietly.
"Apparently." He said, shrugging as I turned to face him, "Actually, I asked to be." He just stared at me, his dark brown eyes boring into my own green ones.
"Why?" I asked, taken aback by his answer.
"Because I wanted the chance to ask you something." He said quietly, eyes dropping and darting around to look at anything other than me as he shifted from side to side.
"Proceed." I responded, cocking an eyebrow in curiosity. The human did indeed have me intrigued, for very few actually requested a straight answer from the God of Lies and Trickery.
"I wanted to know why you were living such a pathetic lie." He quietly stated.
I sucked in a quick breath. The question itself seemed to knock the breath out of me as I jolted in surprise. "What?" I croaked, my eyes widening.
"You're not only lying to us, to your brother, and to your father, but to yourself and I wanted to know why." He said, seeming almost as uncomfortable as I felt.
"And what makes you think that I'm lying to all of you?" I snarled, daring the Ironman to answer back.
"Well, for one thing, your reaction when I brought it up and the second, well, I guess I just saw some of myself in you." He said, turning away.
We stood in silence for several uncomfortable moments as I tried to come up with a suitable answer. As I could come up with none, I simply did not speak. However, in the almost solid silence, my thoughts drifted back to my parents and my brother and all of the reasons that I wanted acceptance in the first place. "I just wanted to please my father." I said quietly, not realizing I'd spoken aloud.
"Really?" Stark asked, taken aback.
"Yes, every time that the pressure got to be too much, I just wanted someone to tell me that I was still important. That I wasn't a complete failure. But, nothing I did was ever enough for him and I just couldn't take it anymore." I said, revisiting my reasons for the first time in years.
"And you found that negative attention was better than no attention at all." He reasoned.
"Mmm." I hummed in agreement.
We stood in silence for a few minutes more and as soon as he opened his mouth to say something, the intercom crackled into life, "Stark, what the hell is taking so long?" Fury demanded angrily.
"Sorry, just bringing him up now." He called back and the intercom clicked off.
"Look, if it makes you feel any better, I went through the same thing with my father. I couldn't stand it anymore, so I just left for college." He said as he approached with that horrid muzzle in his hand.
I merely eyed it and he realized what I was looking at before shrugging in apology. "Look, I'm sorry that it had to end this way for you. I know what that feels like to be unable to talk and it's no fun." He sighed sympathetically.
I merely nodded as the muzzle was slid into place.
Half an hour later, I was on my way home.
Half a day later, I was on my knees in front of my father awaiting his final verdict.
Two days later, I stood with my head held high in front of a hall of people determined to watch the cause of so much trouble be executed before their very eyes.
Two minutes later, I heard the snap as my neck was broken and not allowed to heal.
One minute later, I saw Thor crying and pleading with my father for the umpteenth time to allow me to live to save me before he regretted it later.
Twenty seconds later, my father said no.
Then, I knew nothing at all