AN: Quick note on Mjölnir, here. Because Thor, as we know it, didn't actually happen, Mjölnir hasn't been enchanted with the worthiness deal. Otherwise, carry on.

The dining hall was no place for animals. Least of all, those the size of young horses. Of course, the problem with letting a rule go broken once meant that it stayed broken thereafter.

Loki sat at a table with Alv and Vali, entertaining one another with embellished tales and uncouth jokes. On Loki's right sat Viðar, occasionally tugging on Loki's sleeve and holding up a bit of meat from his plate. Barely pausing at all, Loki turned to blow a puff of cool air onto whatever Viðar had this time deemed too hot to eat. Other times, Loki would pick up something from his own plate and hold it in his mouth, inviting Fenrir to leap forward and snatch it away. Loki laughed at the game, as did his friends, but every time those finger-length fangs were bared, Odin feared the worst.

Odin waited for Loki to slip away from the group and followed after him, meeting him on the terrace that overlooked the bridge to the Bifröst.

"Loki," he said, announcing his presence before getting too close.

Loki turned, and even under the harsh light of the evening suns, he still looked like a boy. He grew no beard on his chin, and even in his Æsir appearance, it was plain his face had not taken any of the harder features of Jötun men. Loki had not noticeably aged in recent years. Standing in the sunset, harshly lit with his alien wolf at his side, Odin wondered if he'd ever really considered the ramifications of his act of kindness long ago.

"Yes?" Loki asked finally.

Fenrir sat at his feet, and without thinking about it, Loki reached out to scratch the side of his face. Odin eyed the wolf warily before he spoke again, reminding himself that it was his son he'd come to speak with, and not an enemy general.

"Midwinter was your twenty-second nameday," Odin said, as if the information had somehow passed Loki by.

"Yes," Loki agreed. "I seem to have a new one each year."

Any other time, Odin might have found Loki's remark humorous, but this time, it only irritated him.

"You have not yet taken your Rite—" Odin said.

"Nor do I plan to," said Loki, cutting him off curtly. "It's an Æsir tradition. I am not Æsir, as I know you're aware."

"You may not be Æsir, but you are Asgardian, and a prince of this realm," Odin said, Forgetting all about the wolf at Loki's side. "You have responsibilities and I will not allow you to ignore them further."

Loki began to voice just how little he cared, but stopped himself short. He had at least learned that lesson. He knew he was not too old for Odin to drag him out of the palace by his hair again. But he would not lose this. He knew there was more than one way out of this absurd custom, even if he hadn't thought of it yet.

"At least let me say my goodbyes," he said with resignation. "Thor wasn't given the chance to do so properly and it plagued me. Let me spare him that."

Odin considered it and nodded. "You have three days," he said. "Not a minute longer."

Before Loki had another chance to renegotiate, Odin left him. Loki watched him leave, and then looked down at Fenrir. Fenrir licked his hand and Loki scratched his ear in return.

"I'll think of something," he said, stroking the wolf's face again. "We're not going anywhere."

Loki stayed all night in his chambers, scheming and pacing silently. Odin was going to make him take Sjálfsmynd come Hel or high water. Surely, there must have been some way to get out of it. Some way to convince Odin to change his mind. He was already a man, in age. Why should he need to prove such things?

Or perhaps, Loki thought. Perhaps there were ways to prove that fact without the year spent in exile. How difficult could it be, truly?

He found Thor at breakfast with Sif on his knee and Fandral boasting loudly about some new deed or another. As Loki neared the table, he and Fandral ignored one another in the name of courtesy.

"Brother," Loki said, sitting close to Thor. "I was thinking of making a trip to Utgard today. Perhaps you would care to join me."

Thor looked at Sif, and then back to Loki. "What brings this on?" he asked. "I thought you preferred to travel alone."

Loki scowled at him. "Father is making me take Sjálfsmynd," he said, annoyed. "I thought we might go somewhere first, before we find ourselves both too occupied to do so again."

He cast a sideways glance to Sif, ready for a biting remark from her. He was almost startled when instead, the remark came from his other side.

"I thought you would have done that already," Fandral said.

Loki glared at him. Fandral answered it with a shrug.

"As often as you're away. I thought it must have happened by now, is all," Fandral reasoned. He looked back and forth from Loki and Thor, as if he might find whatever answer he was looking for written on their faces.

"What do you say?" asked Thor suddenly.

Confused, Loki looked back to him, only to find the question was directed at Sif.

Now, Sif cast a cautious glance to Loki. She knew she was not invited on this trip, and through the years, they had both made good on their pledge to avoid one another's company whenever possible. But it was clear that Thor wanted her to go along. She thought perhaps he might have grown suspicious of the rumours that circulated through the court. Baseless though they were, she knew; Loki was far too distant and disinterested in everything to have designs for the throne.

She looked at him, trying to gauge his thoughts in this. All she could see was Thor's eagerness to have her along.

"I should need to change first," she said, getting to her feet. "I shall only be a few minutes."

Fandral watched her leave before reaching for his ale. "I'm ready whenever."

Loki resisted the urge to grit his teeth at Fandral inviting himself along as well. He had not intended to bring an audience to Jötunheimr.

"I need to see to Fenrir for the day, and then I will meet you in the stables," he said evenly.

He left the dining hall as quickly as he could without running. Fenrir had already been fed and given to the boy Loki employed to mind him during the day, but Loki had to get away from Thor before his anger got the best of him. Sif was not invited. Fandral was not invited. And yet, they were both apparently going with. Loki needed to calm himself before returning to their company.

As he rounded a corner, he came to Volstagg and Hogun, on their way to breakfast. Volstagg was laughing at some unheard joke, but Hogun seemed to have neither heard nor cared.

"Friends," Loki greeted with a false smile. And then an idea struck him. "Thor and I are organising a short trip to Utgard. You should come."

"And skip breakfast?" asked Volstagg.

"Surely we can eat there," Loki said. "My brother's probably waiting already. I was just on my way to meet him now."

Volstagg found the offer irritating, as whichever option he chose, he'd miss out sorely on the other. He looked over to Hogun and the two exchanged shrugs.

"Might as well," Volstagg decided. "You don't have plans, do you?"

Hogun shook his head.

Grinning widely, Loki gestured in the direction of the stables, back the way the other two had come.

"Then let us not waste a moment longer," he said.

They made quick time to the stables, where the others three already waited with their horses. Loki's horse was dressed as well, but the inclusion of the other two delayed their departure all the same. Volstagg and Hogun quickly dressed their horses for the short ride to the Bifröst while Loki took his mount and considered the changes to his plans.

"We'd better be careful," Fandral quipped, taking his own mount and moving his horse to stand beside Thor. "They may mistake us for a war party."

"Don't try to seduce any of their women, and we should be fine," Volstagg volleyed back.

He and Hogun were soon saddled and the six of them were off, out the great golden gates of Asgard's palace and across the rainbow bridge to Heimdall's observatory. Heimdall stood in his place as always, guarding the Bifröst and watching over Yggdrasil for trouble.

"You are not dressed warmly enough," he said without preamble, as the group dismounted their horses and approached.

Loki was in no mood for the tedious mental sparring with Heimdall. He was not surprised to find that the gate keeper knew of their intentions, but he was irritated at the delay all the same.

"Heimdall, let us pass," Thor demanded before Loki even had the chance to say anything.

"What business have you in Jötunheimr?" Heimdall asked, shifting his gaze just enough to make it plain that the question was directed at Loki, and Loki alone.

Thor either didn't notice, or didn't care, and once again spoke first. "Our business is our own," he said. "We are the sons of Odin, and we need not share our plans with anyone. Let us pass."

Heimdall gave the impression of glaring at the lot of them before stepping aside to grant access to the observatory.

"What's the matter?" asked Volstagg as he walked past Loki. "Silver tongue turn to lead?"

Loki glared at him, moving slowly to join the rest inside.

"Remember where the Bifröst takes you," Heimdall warned. "It is easy to get lost on Jötunheimr, and even I cannot dictate where it lands."

"Loki goes to Jötunheimr all the time," Fandral said confidently. "Surely the Bifröst can't be that difficult to find."

"I have never sent him there before," Heimdall said from behind them.

Loki rolled his eyes as the others sent nervous glances between one another, wordlessly questioning Heimdall's meaning. Suddenly, Heimdall drove his sword to the hilt into the pedestal and the group were all pulled forward off their feet and flung into the vastness of space with only a thin beam of light to guide their journey. It was all over in only a few seconds, the silence of Ginnungagap now a ferocious roaring all around them, and then silence again. They landed on the frozen tundra beyond Utgard's walls, surrounded by a new silence; a silence only occasionally broken by the creaking of ice or the shifting of a far-off glacier. Fandral and Sif both stumbled to regain their footing as they landed, Volstagg remained steady on his feet. Even Hogun barely swayed as he surveyed the landscape around them.

Utgard stood in the distance, far enough away not to be touched by the Bifröst, but close enough that an Asgardian would not freeze before reaching her gates. Even from the distance, Utgard was a mass of icy spires that rose toward the black sky above. They seemed almost to glow in the never-ending night; a towering beacon in a stark and unforgiving realm.

"Watch out for eagles," Loki warned as he took the lead. "They like to pick things up and take them."

Even he cast a wary eye toward the stars, imagining he might be able to hear one screaming high above them. A flapping noise behind him stopped Loki in his tracks. Fighting the urge to hide in a hole in the ice, he spun round, seeing Fandral donning his cloak in the snow. Glaring at Fandral's puzzled look, Loki turned to lead the way once more.

"I remember the eagles during the war," Volstagg said. "We never could figure out how to give those men a proper burial."

Loki glared back at him, but said nothing.

They walked quickly across the hard, salty ice, reaching Utgard's gates in little time. Upon reaching the city, it was plain that the splendour seen from the Bifröst site had been nothing more than an illusion. Many of the towers and spires crumbled in neglect, and the streets were bare, save the debris from whatever fell from above.

"There is no-one here," Hogun declared warily. He and Fandral both moved closer to Sif, but she stepped ahead of them quickly.

Loki ignored all of them. "This place once looked like Asgard," he said, craning his neck to look at the top of the nearest tower.

"You should have seen it," Volstagg agreed. "All of Asgard's beauty, frozen in ice."

"I would have liked to," Loki said.

"We should not be here," Hogun said all the same.

"Why are we here?" asked Sif.

Loki broke into a grin and turned to face the others. "To have a bit of fun, of course."

He disappeared into a dark hole in the wall, leaving the others with little choice but to follow after him. What seemed like no more than a crack in the wall opened up into a small, but high room, with a single occupant guarding its single door. The guard was large even by Jötun standards. He stood at least ten feet tall and had arms as big around as tree trunks. But what the younger half of the party were staring at was the man's horns, high on his brow and blue like the rest of him, fading to black at the tips. They weren't like a ram's or a goat's horns, but smooth, with a distorted S-shaped curve to them, sweeping back and then coming to point forward again. At the sight of him, Fandral and Hogun book took wary steps back, unconsciously moving to put themselves tween the guard and Sif.

The guard acted as if he hadn't even seen them, however. He turned his bored gaze to Loki instead.

"What are you doing here, Trickster?" he asked.

Loki smiled up at him without fear or apprehension. "Why, Gangr. We're here to spend silver. What else does a person do here?" he asked.

Gangr rolled his eyes and pounded his fist on the opaque ice door, commanding it to open.

"Stay away from the rooms, or I'll throw you out myself," he warned.

Loki bowed sarcastically to Gangr and walked through the door. Loki and Thor seemed unfazed by his presence, but Even Volstagg cast him a wary glance as he passed the towering man.

"What rooms were those?" Fandral asked as Loki led them into a large mead hall that seemed to be carved out of a single large stone wall.

Like everything on Jötunheimr, the building had been formed from the very realm itself. Utgard sat in a deep, narrow valley, bordered on three sides by high mountains. They were not skilled craftsmen, like the dwarfs of Niðavellir, but they had ways of using the very ice they commanded to carve out large caverns and halls from the mountains. It was a technology long lost to them, along with the Casket and most of their army during the last great war.

Now, with the city's population dwindling and the mountain crumbling around them, once-abandoned spaces within the city became re-purposed. What was once the house of a nobleman was now full of hard furniture and rough furs, all abused and barely holding together after years of serving what remained of Laufey's army. What had once been painstakingly polished wooden sofas and beds, imported from beyond Jötunheimr's borders, now splintered and cracked, sitting incongruously against still battered and beaten stone tables and benches.

The hall itself was not as cold as several of the Asgardians thought it should have been. If anything, the air was thick and cloying as any mead hall on Asgard.

"Lovely girls here," Loki said to Fandral. "But they don't give private shows, no matter how much you offer."

No sooner had Loki spoken, several dozen men — younger men, by their size — jumped to their feet and rushed to the Asgardians by the door. Wishing desperately that they had brought weapons on this journey, all but Thor and Loki readied themselves for a melee. Though Thor had Mjölnir at his side, he didn't raise it. Instead, he shook his head fondly.

The mob descended upon Loki, who made no effort at all to defend himself, and instead only laughed as he was jostled about by a small army of men larger in every way than he was.

"Yes, I should have known," he said, reaching into one of his hidden pockets and pulling forth a small, brown parcel. "I have lemon drops and peanut butter cups. Who wants what?"

The area evolved into a barely-controlled chaos as men of all ages began to shove their way close enough to part with a silver piece in exchange for one of the strangely sweet little morsels Loki brought to their realm.

"What's this, then?" Volstagg asked curiously, torn between edging away and getting closer to see what Loki was handing out.

Thor laughed and shook his head. "Loki likes uncontrollable mobs," he said. "He likes uncontrollable mobs of children most, but drunken soldiers and hunters are close enough, I suppose."

Fandral and Sif exchanged wary looks as Thor waved the group to follow him.

"Come. Loki will catch up."

"It's amazing they don't all melt in here," Fandral grumbled to himself. "They're made of ice, I thought."

He drew wary, uncertain glances from his fellows, none sure how to respond to a statement they all knew to be false. When he felt the hot touch of skin on his neck and breath on his ear, he nearly jumped.

"Only when they choose to be," Loki reminded him firmly. He squeezed the back of Fandral's neck just enough to be uncomfortable and dropped the temperature of his hands as a brief, but sharp reminder to hold his tongue. Smiling at the rest of the group, Loki stood straight again and looked around with an open and innocent expression. "Drinks, anyone?"

Sif glared suspiciously as he placed a large tray on the table, carrying a tankard for each of them.

"Fr—Jötun mead is toxic," she said levelly. "Unless you wish us poisoned."

Loki looked positively hurt at her words. "Small beer, only. I assure you," he said. "Thor hasn't dropped dead from it yet, so I doubt very much that you will, unfortunately."

Sif glowered at him, taking a tankard in a show of spite. Volstagg, ignoring their sniping, reached eagerly for a drink of his own. "Well, then. Don't mind if I do."

Thor took one as well, and soon after Hogun and Fandral followed. Hogun made a show of sniffing at his until he was certain as he could be that he wouldn't be poisoned by it, and eventually took a cautious sip.

"I remember coming to places like this before the war," Volstagg said. "They had a better selection then, but I don't imagine Jötunheimr gets much trade these days."

"And you should see the fortune I make because of it," Loki said with a smug grin. "Which, by the way. I did promise breakfast, did I not?"

He dropped onto the table a bag made of brown paper. Curious, Volstagg picked it up and peered inside, finding a few small, paper-wrapped parcels. He took one of the larger ones and unwrapped it, finding a small, brown bowl with a flat top and ridged sides. Confident in Loki's lack of a desire to kill him, he popped the morsel into his mouth, and was immediately surprised to find it at once salty and almost unbelievably sweet. He immediately went for another one.

The crowd around them followed a certain ebb and flow as everyone seemed to keep to some schedule marked by a time which almost stood still on Jötunheimr. The sun never rose there, except for at the realm's south pole, where it never set. Still, something there marked the time, and those who lived there followed it, coming from and leaving to attend whatever their duties for the day.

Unlike the soldiers who patrolled Utgard's barren roads, the men who came to the mead hall were not so scantily clad. They dressed in furs from mammoths and polar bears, but more for adornment than for warmth. They wore their wealth for all to see, with beads of gold and precious stones and jewels sewn into the furs.

Horns were also not unique to the man who guarded the door. The hall had high ceilings to accommodate them, but even then some would still scrape and gouge the ceiling if they were not careful. Some of the men had runes and symbols carved into theirs. Others still were held off-balance by a horn broken, and still struggling to regrow to match the other.

There were some boys as well; taller than any of the Asgardians still, but clearly boys all the same. Loki took a special interest in them, watching while making it look as if his attentions were elsewhere. He made a point of not staring, and only just managed it.

"When do you get yours," Thor teased, nudging Loki with his elbow.

"Hush," said Loki quietly. "They think me Æsir. I prefer to keep it that way."

Thor snorted. "That's a first."

"Shut up," Loki spat back.

"Uh, lads," Fandral said quickly, cutting in. "Company."

Loki looked up to where the others were staring, and brightened immediately. He'd expected a tediously long wait, so seeing the one on whom his entire scheme was hinged approach the table was enough to make him forget to be annoyed with Thor. He was taller than most of the other Jötun men in the hall, with horns that bore the scars of being broken and cracked in several places each. As he stomped toward their table, his ruby gaze was focused directly at Loki.

"What are you doing here, Trickster?" the Jötun asked angrily. "I thought I told you not to show your pale little face around here again."

Loki smiled at him, ignoring everyone else's nervousness.

"I'll bet you ten silver pieces you change your mind on that," Loki said, pouring the coins out onto the table.

"Fine. You can stay. Ha! I win!" As he collected the coins, realisation of what he had lost dawned on him. "You little snake!"

"Manners, Thrymr," Loki said sweetly. "You'll frighten my friends."

Thrymr turned his attention to the others, sizing up the lot of them. His gaze lingered on Sif for a few moments to long, rising her ire, but she tried not to show her discomfort lest it only encourage him. Thor noticed Thrymr's gaze as well and straightened his back, for the first time since their arrival showing anything other than open acceptance for Jötunheimr and her people.

Thrymr scoffed at what he saw and turned his attention back to Loki.

"Your friends are just as pathetic as you are," he said.

Thor leapt to his feet, brandishing Mjölnir menacingly. "You dare insult me?" he demanded. "The son of Odin?"

Thrymr grinned widely, showing up sharp, jagged teeth as he laughed. He stepped closer, invading Thor's space with his massive bulk.

"What are you going to do about it, little Æsir?" he asked. "I could crush you and your friends now, but what would the sport be in it?"

His gaze fell once more to Sif, and suddenly Loki began to feel his plan fraying at the edges. If he wasn't careful, it would fall apart completely. Thor, enraged by the insult, stepped forward so quickly Fandral and Volstagg barely had time to hold him back.

"The only sport to be had will be me knocking the teeth from your skull," Thor insisted.

Thrymr laughed again, as one would to indulge a small child making play at war.

"Thor, not now," Loki insisted quietly. He turned his attention back to address Thrymr. "We came here to spend silver, nothing more. We have no quarrel with you. Do we, Brother?"

He jabbed an elbow to Thor's ribs at the last word, but Thor paid him no mind.

Thrymr smiled wolfishly, and Loki wasn't sure if he should be pleased or not. The Jötnar had their honour, and while Thor hadn't outright insulted it, he was still dangerously close to doing so.

"Then let us spend it," Thrymr said. He dropped a leather purse onto the table, just out of Loki's reach. "Best me, and it's yours."

Thor eyed the purse, and even without counting its contents, knew it contained more than he had brought with him to Jötunheimr.

"I will match it," he said all the same.

"Show me," Thrymr insisted.

Thor couldn't, and he faltered for a moment, not wanting to back out. "You have my word," he said. "As the son of Odin, I—"

Thrymr laughed again, exaggeratedly loud so all in the mead hall might have heard it. "Your word is no good here! Your father is a murderer and a thief. I will not wager on your word." He leered at Sif again, and this time Loki knew his plan was falling apart.

"You will wager with what you have," Thrymr said. "If I win, you will give me a wife."

"Thor, no," Loki insisted, grabbing Thor's arm to try to pull him back. "You can't do this. You don't know what you're doing. This is madness."

Thor shook himself free, elbowing Loki aside. "Know your place, Brother," he said. He looked back to Thrymr and nodded. "I accept."

Thrymr grinned even wider than before and turned away. "The Æsir princess has challenged me!" he called to the room.

While Thor seethed and raised Mjölnir again, the hall around them erupted into chaos as a large space was cleared out, all tables and benches pushed aside. Biting his thumbnail, Loki watched all of this in silence. He had never planned for this, for Thor to actually challenge Thrymr in this way. Clearly, Thor's bull-headedness was not a force to be underestimated. Loki would have to think fast if he wished to avoid disaster now.

"There are rules here," Loki said suddenly, hoping to at least put off disaster a bit longer. "Rules you must obey or else forfeit. No weapons, and no help. This is a test of strength between the two of you, and you alone."

Thor glared at him. "You tell me this now?" he demanded.

"You didn't let me speak," Loki hissed back.

Thor raised his fist to strike Loki, but Volstagg stayed it. Loki glared back at both of them, almost wishing Thor would strike him and give reason for Loki to abandon him to his fate.

"Might he perhaps back out?" Fandral asked hopefully.

Loki shook his head. "No. It would be considered forfeit and Thor would have to make good on his wager."

Several wary glances were thrown in Sif's direction, where she stood stiffly, glaring daggers at Thor. Had she been capable of casting magic, Loki thought Thor might have been struck dead right there.

"Well, there's nothing that can be done now," Volstagg said, easing Thor's arm down. "We can only learn from it for next time, and have to win this time."

Still glaring at Loki, Thor dropped Mjölnir to the ground and stepped into the cleared space. Thrymr attacked at once, throwing a punch like a boulder at his face. Thor dodged it, but only barely. It seemed, aside from the rules Loki spoke, there were none. Thor rushed Thrymr, who stood to one side and before Thor could wheel round, attacked from behind like a coward, grabbing Thor and making himself too cold to touch. Thor growled and scrabbled at Thrymr's arms but without a weapon, it was an unfair fight. None of Týr's lessons mentioned anything of foes capable of freezing flesh right off the bone, but Thor hadn't time to contemplate this oversight.

Thrymr seemed to go out of his way to fight unfairly. At a time when Thor almost managed to pull him into a choke hold, he was stopped by sharp teeth digging into the flesh of his arm, and a mouth as big as a Jötun's might have cleaved his arm in two if Thor didn't move away quickly. He had just enough time to wonder, as he dodged around the edge of the cleared space, if biting and clawing was a natural thing for a Jötun to do in a fight, given how quick Loki often was to use his teeth as a weapon.

All around him, Thor could hear the jeering laughter as wagers were made on the outcome of the duel. Suddenly, Thor no longer cared about a fair fight. The son of Odin would not be so openly mocked. As he backed up to a long table, he thought he could hear a shout in protest, but he ignored it. There was a large glass wine bottle behind him, and unthinking Thor picked it up and heaved it at Thrymr's face. As it connected with its target, the laughter around him turned to deafening anger. Thrymr stood still, unfazed by the blow but angry all the same.

"The Odinson forfeits," Thrymr declared to the crowd. "I am the victor!"

As the crowd began cheering for Thrymr, Thor returned to Loki's side, seething. Before he was able to voice his complaints about the match, Loki released a barrage of wild slaps to Thor's head, silencing anything he might have said.

"You stupid, stupid idiot!" Loki scolded. "What the Hel were you even thinking—"

Before his slaps could turn to punches, Volstagg and Hogun pulled him away, holding him back with all their strength. The look they shared before turning to glance to Thrymr kept Thor silent as the Jötun neared their group.

"I'll be having my prize now," Thrymr said, leering opening at Sif.

"No," Loki protested before he realised it. "Not her."

Under any other circumstance, he would have been delighted to be so completely rid of her, but somehow his plans had fallen apart before they even took off. His only regret now was that his ever-changing strategy meant having to save Sif from Thrymr's grasp.

"I was promised a wife," Thrymr said. "She'll do nicely."

"She most certainly will not," Sif snapped.

Loki gently nudged her away from Thrymr, putting himself between the two of them. "She's spoken for already," he said.

Sif looked to him, unable to discern Loki's intent and whether she should be grateful or insulted.

"I can handle this myself," she said.

Loki levelled a conflicted glance at her, clenching his jaw to keep from saying anything to make the situation any worse than it already was. Before his tongue could slip, Fandral took Sif by the arm and guided her back further still.

"Perhaps it would be wise to stand this one down," he suggested.

She glared at him, but said nothing more.

"I will return to Asgard and find a wife for you there," Thor said. "This I swear."

All jest was gone from Thrymr as he turned his sneer to Thor. "You expect me to take your word. You're as stupid as you are arrogant. I want that one. I won her, and they all saw it." He gestured to the increasingly restive crowd around them.

"Then I will stay behind," Loki volunteered quickly. "As ransom, until such time as Thor returns."

"Your word is worth even less than his," Thrymr growled. "I wouldn't trust you not to slay me while I slept."

Loki snorted before he could stop himself. "At least I have never wagered that which I had not to give."

Thrymr glared at him, finding Loki unmoved by the display. "Then I'll have this as ransom," he said. He reached down for Mjölnir where it sat on the ground and took it as if it were a mere trinket. "It will make a good door-stopper, I think."

Thor growled and Loki buried his face in his hands. As ransom, he could have left any time he wished. Mjölnir would have to be retrieved.

"Fine," Loki said tiredly.

"What?" Thor demanded. "It's not yours to give."

Behind them, Sif snorted.

"And neither is a wife yours," Loki spat back. "Or are you setting out to become a tyrant before you ever take the throne?"

There was an awkward silence as Thrymr grinned lecherously. Finally, Loki sighed.

"I'm going home," he declared. "Follow me or don't. I care not."

He left the mead hall, avoiding his own reflection in the ice around him. How his plan had failed so completely, he had no idea. How difficult should it have been to talk Thor out of another foolish plan and prove himself the proper man of the two of them? Thor could be impulsive, Loki knew, but this was a shock to even him.

He didn't even wait for the others to catch him up. Rather than returning to the Bifröst, Loki simply went home in his own way.

Loki was at his desk in his rooms when he heard the Bifröst activate. He was almost considering becoming concerned that the others might not find the Bifröst site on their own, but it seemed an unfounded worry. With them all home, he suspected Thor would be barging into his rooms at any moment to start shouting at Loki for humiliating him in front of his friends. Loki had a few choice things he wanted to shout back.

While he waited for the inevitable, Loki pored over a script, trying to determine which role he fancied auditioning for. Fluellen, he thought. He'd never been Welsh before, though he'd been to Wales and could imitate their language and inflections. When he did finally hear the door downstairs open, and heavy footsteps on the stairs, Loki ignored it. He preferred to let the fight come to him.

The one who let himself into Loki's bedchamber wasn't Thor, but Odin. He stood by the door, surveying the disorganised stacks of books and papers and piles of clothing that littered the room. It was not how a prince's chambers should have been, but twenty-two years of insistences otherwise had failed to convince Loki to at least try to keep his rooms tidy. With a tired sigh, Odin approached Loki's desk, glancing down at the printed booklet before him.

"Another order you continue to ignore, I see," Odin observed, recognising the language written on the pages.

"Your decree said only that the Bifröst is not to be opened to Midgard," Loki said, not looking up from the script. "I've not used the Bifröst to travel there for several years."

"I know what I said," Odin said. "I spoke without knowing my own son would find away to twist my words against me."

He didn't speak with anger, but with weariness, tired of having the same argument again and again.

"Was there something you needed, Father?" asked Loki innocently. "My three days are not yet up, so surely you aren't here to discuss that."

Odin's gaze narrowed at Loki.

"Your brother just returned from Jötunheimr," Odin said.

"Did he?" Loki asked distantly. "And did he tell you how he made an idiot's wager?"

Odin didn't speak for a long moment, regarding Loki thoughtfully. "He told me enough," he said finally. "Why do you do these things, Loki? Is it not enough that I took you in; gave you a home?"

Loki laughed incredulously. "For which I am grateful, but what has that to do with Thor's behaviour today? He comes home with his tail between his legs after showing off, and I'm the one to be blamed for his arrogance."

"You led him there," Odin pointed out.

"And I am not his keeper," Loki insisted. "As you so astutely pointed out last night, I am not even able to make the decisions he so poorly judged today. You can't accuse me of one thing, and then blame me for its exact opposite."

Odin sighed as he turned away. "No," he agreed. "I can't. I suppose I'm a fool to ever expect anything from you, unless it's disappointment."

Loki stared up at Odin in disbelief, speechless. "Is—Is that it?" he demanded, getting to his feet.

Odin turned back to him and shook his head. "What else would you have of me, Loki? You've given me no reason to believe otherwise."

Before Loki could respond, Odin left the room, shutting the door behind him. Loki covered his face and screamed, drowning out the sound of his father's steps on the stairs. He kicked at nothing and at everything, not even knowing where to direct his anger. How had his day go so badly? How was it that nothing went as planned? For but a brief moment, Loki thought to be grateful that Odin hadn't disowned him outright, but then he realised all the good it would have done. Loki had all but disinherited himself years before. He wasn't even able to grant Odin that satisfaction.

As he swore and kicked stacks of books and whatever else his feet could find to kick, his door opened again, but he ignored it. He didn't want a second round, and wouldn't grant that satisfaction.

"Loki, stop this," Frigga said from behind him, her voice as hard and cold as Loki had ever heard it.

Loki stilled at once and turned cautiously to face her.

"Mother," he greeted. "I was just—"

"I know what you were doing," Frigga cut him off. "And don't think I am not aware of what you've done this morning."

"I've done nothing," Loki insisted.

Almost faster than Loki could see, Frigga reached out and grabbed him by the ear, pulling him down to her eye level. A minor scuffle with Odin, he could have handled. It was even expected. But he couldn't remember the last time Frigga saw fit to discipline him. He grit his teeth, hoping she would at least make her point quickly.

"Do you think Heimdall is the only one in this realm to see what transpires in it?" Frigga demanded.

Loki breathed heavily through his nose to keep from crying out. He didn't dare answer her and risk it, but he also didn't have to.

"I know you schemed against your brother, though to what ends, I cannot fathom," Frigga continued, twisting his ear once again. "You will right this, and you will make amends."

"Yes, mother!" Loki's eyes were watering.

She let him go and lingered in his bedchamber long enough to give him a sad look. Then she turned and left, leaving Loki stunned amidst his mess of books and papers. Odin's disappointment only made Loki angry. Frigga's made him want to weep.

Sif found Loki in one of the palace's wide corridors, knocking his forehead into a pillar at a steady rhythm. Though she couldn't hear his curses, she thought she might have known what troubled him. It troubled her as well, though perhaps for different reasons. She kept her distance for a long moment, contemplating an oath she'd made years before. While completely avoiding one another's presence would have been impossible, she had honoured the agreement as well as she was able, as had he. But this was a conversation she needed to have with Loki, and Loki alone. Drawing in a deep breath, Sif steeled herself and approached him.

"Loki," she said, announcing her presence.

"Go away. I'm busy," Loki said, in time with his head striking the golden pillar.

Sif stood her ground. "Please. I would like to speak with you," she said.

Loki sighed, though he stopped pounding his head against the pillar. Looking at it, he almost hoped to see the indentations of horns where his head struck, but the gold was as flawless as ever. He rubbed a hand over his irritatingly smooth forehead.

"Then speak and be gone," he said.

Nodding, Sif dared another step closer. "I would like to thank you," she said. "For this morning. Things could have gone very badly if you hadn't spoken up when you did."

Loki snorted. "And now some other maiden is to be taken from her home and given away as a token. And you would thank me for that?"

"No," Sif admitted. She fought the urge to look away from the scornful look Loki levelled upon her. "I know your feelings toward me, and know that you did not have to speak to defend me. But you were right. It was not Thor's wager to make."

"Did that burn your tongue to admit?" Loki asked. "How difficult was it for you to think that I might be capable of such things?"

Sif hadn't expected the conversation to come easily, but she hadn't expected it to come so painfully either. It took her several moments to bite back a harsh reply before she felt it safe to speak again.

"Loki, I would ask if we could start over," she said.

He laughed suddenly, an incredulous bark that startled Sif into taking a step backwards.

"Start over?" Loki asked. "Yes, it has been rather a long time since I was ever accused of being Thor's shadow. Shall we start there? Or perhaps I can cast some harmless charm? Dökkálfar, perhaps? It would be rather amusing to watch rumours spread of how Odin keeps an orc hidden away in his court, wouldn't it?"

"Loki, please," Sif pleaded.

Loki threw his hands into the air, amazed that she could still go on as she was. "Please?" he asked. "Please what? You've hated me ever since we were children. I've only ever been happy to indulge you that fancy and return the favour. Why stop now when we're having so much fun?"

"I never hated you, Loki," Sif said evenly. "It was childish jealousy, but never hate. The only hate I held was that Thor preferred your company to mine. I regret my actions and would take them back if I could. I am ashamed to say I acted without honour."

"Honour?" Loki asked quickly, head cocked to one side, suddenly deep in thought.

"Yes, honour," said Sif. "Surely you know if it."

Loki didn't answer her. Instead, he turned to rush down the hall, leaving Sif alone where she stood.

Honour was exactly what he needed to solve Thor's problem. Thor would simply have to honour the terms of his wager. Loki let himself into Thor's rooms, pleased to find his brother sulking on the terrace. He fiddled with the bandage wrapped round his arm, ignoring Loki..

"My rooms. Quickly," Loki said, crossing the room to grab Thor and pull him along. "If we make haste, Thrymr will still be where we left him."

Thor looked eagerly to Loki. "You believe I can get Mjölnir back?" he asked.

"Or at least get you out of the terms of your idiotic wager," Loki said. "Quickly. Come along."

He let go of Thor and made quick tracks to his rooms, Thor close on his heels. Loki led Thor up to his bedchamber and threw open the wardrobe. Casting a quick glance back to Thor, Loki began to rummage through the over-stuffed wardrobe, tossing several garments aside. Finally, he found a pink gown he thought would fit and laid it out on his bed.

"Dress quickly. We haven't got much time," Loki said, going to the mirror to tidy his own appearance.

Thor looked at the gown and forced a laugh, hoping that Loki was only jesting.

"It is a lovely gown, Brother, but I do not think the colour suits me," he said.

Loki tied his hair back into a tail and looked at Thor in the mirror. "I don't have anything in red. That will have to do," he said.

Thor's smile dropped at once.

"You cannot be serious," he said flatly.

"Can and am. Now quickly."

Loki didn't wait to see if Thor would do as he said. He grabbed up his throwing knives from his desk, and one by one secreted them about his body.

"You think we'll need to fight them?" Thor asked, still frowning at the gown on Loki's bed.

"Insurance," Loki said. "If I have to tell you to dress once more, I will not help you."

Loki's words were enough to move Thor into action. He quickly undressed and squeezed himself awkwardly into the gown. A generous dose of magic from Loki, and the gown was loosened to fit him, and once it was all tied and pinned into place, Loki quickly arranged a veil over Thor's face.

"Keep your head down," Loki warned. "Don't let anyone see your face until you have that damned hammer, or you'll never have it back."

Thor scowled at the ground. "Aye," he said darkly.

Loki smiled as he adjusted the gown once more. "A pretty bride for a pretty suitor."

Before Thor could retaliate, Loki took his hand and returned to Jötunheimr. When they landed, Thor leaned heavily against Loki, damning him for his favoured mode of travel. While he grew accustomed to it, he didn't think he'd ever truly get over the sickness in his stomach that followed.

Loki had taken them directly to Utgard, only a few steps away from the mead hall. Taking Thor by the elbow, Loki guided the way back past the angry guard, offering false flattery as he grudgingly let them in. They found Thrymr still present, gloating about his victory to the crowd. He used Mjölnir as a foot rest, having apparently already grown bored with it otherwise. At the sight of it, Loki could feel Thor tense.

"Keep quiet," he warned, holding Thor back. "This will only work if you keep to your role."

Loki led Thor to Thrymr, stopping just out of his reach.

"Thrymr, as promised, I return with the agreed prize for your earlier wager with my brother," Loki said, guiding Thor to take a step closer.

Thrymr snorted. "Where is he, then? Too ashamed to show his face here again?"

Loki smiled tightly, keeping his grip on Thor. "Something like that," he said.

Thrymr raked his eyes over Thor, taking in his heavy form underneath the gown he wore. "She's big for your kind, isn't she?" he asked.

Loki held his smile. "You have no idea," he said.

After a few moments longer, Thrymr nodded. He handed Mjölnir over to Loki, too busy pulling Thor close to notice the way the weight of the hammer nearly brought Loki to the ground. As Thrymr held onto Thor, he nodded appreciatively.

"Let's get a good look at you," he said. Before he could be stopped, Thrymr lifted Thor's veil, and was met with a murderous scowl. Thrymr shouted wordlessly and threw Thor to one side.

"Is she not pretty enough?" asked Loki, still holding onto Mjölnir's handle.

Thrymr focused his attention on Loki, forgetting about Thor. As he lunged forward, Loki tried desperately to lift Mjölnir off the ground in a blind panic. Thrymr made to tackle him, but when he reached Loki, Thrymr fell straight through him as he dissolved into thin air. At that moment, those watching the scene leapt up to assist Thrymr, putting Thor and Loki at the centre of a very unfair brawl. Grinning with blood-lust, Thor took up Mjölnir, holding it threateningly above his head. But the time for threats was long over. Thrymr formed a blade of ice over his own arm and swung it at Thor. Thor blocked with his hammer, shattering the ice over Thrymr's arm. He used the distraction caused to swing again, this time slamming the hammer into the side of Thrymr's face. Thrymr stumbled back, but didn't fall, all the more angry.

As he once more attacked Thor, two more Jötnar descended upon Loki, finding their faces sliced open for their efforts. Loki held onto two of his daggers, electing to slash with them rather than throw in the close confines of the mead hall. Loki easily dodged around the larger warriors, slipping out of their reach without his magic and disappearing completely with it.

Thor was more indiscriminate with his approach, using his melee weapon to its full effect. He swung Mjölnir in large circles, taking down as many tables around him as he did those who wished to fight him. Loki armed himself with a broken plank from one of the long benches, using it as an overly-large spear. He swung and jabbed with it, keeping himself away from the large swords of ice some of the Jötnar wielded.

"I thought you hated this sort of thing!" Thor called out as he dislocated one Jötun's jaw with an uppercut swing of his hammer.

Loki swung his plank, striking one Jötun on the side of the head while he jabbed his elbow into another's throat.

"I do!" he said.

The distraction proved catastrophic for him as he found himself cornered between a high bench and Gangr. Before Loki was able to slide away, Gangr grabbed Loki's arm, burying it in his massive hand. When he didn't openly attack, it took Loki a few moments to realise what was being done. The sleeve of his heavy tunic cracked and shattered as Gangr grinned, satisfied to finally be rid of his personal thorn in his side.

From Gangr's hand, the dark blue pallor of Loki's natural skin began to spread out, slowly seeping up his arm. Loki looked up as the satisfaction on Gangr's face turned to confusion. Loki offered something like an embarrassed chuckle, confusing him further. Before the guard could regain himself, Loki headbutted him. Though he had no horns like the man who held him, his head was hard enough to shatter Gangr's nose and startle him into letting go.

Loki dared a quick look to where his glamour sluggishly took hold again, hiding his blue skin and replacing it with the pink skin of the Æsir. At another time, he would definitely have to experiment further, but this was not the time.

"Thor, we must go!" he called out, fearing what might happen if those around him found out what he had for so long kept from them.

Without giving Thor the chance to argue, Loki lunged toward Thor. As soon as he had Thor's wrist in his hand, Loki took them home. They landed in the gardens, Thor mid-swing. Mjölnir came down to the ground with a deafening roar of thunder, and before all was quiet again, he picked the hammer up again and rounded on Loki. With the gown torn and mangled, barely hanging off his waist, Loki almost laughed. If not for the murderous glare Thor gave him, Loki would have.

"Loki, what have you done?" Thor demanded.

Loki took several quick steps back. "I brought us home before you could do more damage than you've already done," he said. "I got your precious hammer back. You should be grateful."

"You humiliated me," Thor shouted. "You had me debase myself before them, and then before I could regain my honour, you have me flee like a coward."

Loki clenched his fists at his sides. "Fine," he said. "Do it your way next time. If you'll excuse me, I have an audition to make."

He turned and stalked away, pushing past Sif as she ran toward Thor. She barely had time to recover he step before he was inside the palace, disappearing behind the walls. Seeing her approach, Thor brandished Mjölnir in Loki's direction.

"Look at him run like a coward," he complained.

Sif slapped him across the face. She hadn't planned on doing so when she sought him out, but she found she felt better for it. "I am not yours to do with as you please. If ever you behave as such again—"

"Nothing came of it," Thor insisted.

Sif wanted to slap him again, but she stayed her hand. "And to whom do you owe your thanks for that?" she demanded.

Thor started to answer, but silenced himself instead. He wasn't sure what answer she was expected, and wasn't in the mood to work it out. "I am sorry, Sif," he said finally.

"I am not the only one you owe apologies," she said.

Thor studied her face for a few moments. One of the things he so liked about her was her passion, but he had never seen it so twisted like this before. Anger was unfamiliar on her, and it stung to have it directed at him. He nodded slowly, finally dropping Mjölnir to his side.

"Yes, I… I think you're right," he said.

He left her in the gardens, tracing the path up to Loki's rooms, where he was sure to find his brother sulking. That Loki had humiliated him, he was not so quick to forgive, but he did have Mjölnir back for it.

Thor found Loki's doors unlocked, which he took as a sign that he wasn't entirely unwelcome. He let himself in, climbing the stairs that led to Loki's bedchamber. He found the door ajar, but the room itself was empty. Loki's travelling bag wasn't where it was kept by the sofas, and his desk was cleared of any books or papers. Beyond that, the room looked exactly as it did when Loki brought him up here to change.

Sighing, Thor put Mjölnir down and took off the gown Loki had put him in, exchanging it instead for the tunic and breeches he'd left on the bed. He didn't think about where Loki might have gone off to. He'd left before without warning. Loki would come back, Thor told himself. He always did.

AN:

My frost giants have horns, and very particular horns. This is for reasons. I know they don't have horns in the movie, but this was never pretending to be strictly movie-canon anyway. I have done horrible things to mythology in this chapter. For that, I apologise, only not really because Marvel did horrible things to mythology first. This fic is done. I've told everything that needs to be told about Asgard and the house of Odin, so now we start to get to the real AU bits. This was only ever meant to just be a bit of exposition, but then it became a thing of its own and whoops. Be sure to keep an eye out for the next part of the series, which is tentatively titled Midgard Legends. You can author subscribe (or subscribe to the series, if reading on AO3), and I also put updates on my tumblr (zetatauri) in between posts where I complain about Hiddleston's face or something. Unlike this one, I'm not even going to try to pretend to estimate the amount of chapters. This one ran over the target by two, so clearly, my estimation of these things is a bit off. All I can say is that the next one will be as long, if not longer than this one. Thanks for reading! Thanks for your comments and favourites! I'll see you all next time!