A bit of girl time. Just because.

Chapter Three

Cindy was painting her toenails when Max got to her apartment. She had the day off work, and as it was a Saturday, had decided to spend the majority of the daylight hours primping to get ready to go out that night.

"Oh, boo, what have you got yourself into?" Max stopped mid-stride.

"I… what?" Cindy couldn't know already, could she? Had Alec told her?

"You look like you been mud-wrestling in the woods, girl. Look at your legs." Max looked down at her legs numbly, and realised that the mud and leaves had crusted there. Attractive.

"Oh." She said shortly. "You got a pair of sweats I could borrow?" Cindy raised an eyebrow.

"Original Cindy does not do sweatpants. But she does have some seriously comfy booty shorts from a sports themed party a couple months ago." Max smiled.

"Well luckily for you, I shaved my legs yesterday, so I will take up that offer." Cindy nodded and grinned at her.

"Middle drawer in the dresser in your old room." She pointed to the door with the nail polish in her hand. "I'd get 'em for you, but I ain't finished my art work here." Max laughed.

"No problem, Cin." She walked the few short paces into her old room and pushed the door half closed. It felt strange being in there, after so many months of living in TC. It had been her apartment once. Then came Kendra. Then Cindy. The whole apartment was Cindy's now, so it made sense that she had moved into Max's old room and out of her curtained section. It was barely recognisable as the Spartan quarters she had once kept.

The walls were purple. There was a big, ornate mirror over the dresser, and Max recoiled slightly at the image reflected in it. There was mud on her face and what looked like a couple of small twigs in her hair. She yanked them out and ran her fingers through the knotted locks, wincing when her hand snagged. She gently teased out the tangles, and then grabbed the grey and orange shorts that were the only remotely comfortable or athletic looking garment in the middle drawer. There were a few lycra numbers in there, but Max was pretty sure that they weren't what Cindy had in mind. Or that anyone would describe them as 'comfy'.

She ducked into the small bathroom to pull off her muddy jeans and shimmy into the shorts. She took a couple of minutes to wash her face and another couple to just stare into the bathroom mirror. She couldn't figure out what the hell she was going to say to her best friend. What does a normal girl do in this situation? What should she lead with, the engagement or the cheating? The good or the bad? What if Cindy got angry with her or refused to talk to her about it? What if it only made it all worse?

Only one way to find out.

Cindy hadn't moved from her spot when Max re-entered the living room. Max sat on the couch beside her, pulling her legs up and crossing them. Cindy looked at her quickly out of the corner of her eye, then put the bottle of polish on the coffee table and turned to face her fully.

"What is it? What's wrong, boo?" Max almost laughed. She should have known Cindy would see her discomfort before she said anything. She was still for a moment, trying to think how she could say what she wanted, no, needed, to say.

"I did a bad thing, Cin." Her best friend raised an eyebrow.

"What kind of bad thing are we talkin' here?" said Cindy, slowly. "Because with you, that could have a whole dictionary of definitions." Max considered that.

"Boy bad."

"All boys are bad, you're gonna need to be more specific." Though the words were light, Cindy wasn't smiling.

"Alec. We…" Max stared very hard at her lap. When Cindy didn't say anything, Max looked at her again. She didn't need to say more, but Cindy's face was unreadable. If she was upset, angry, judging, weirded out, hell even just a little surprised, she was being very careful not to show it. "I really need you to say something."

"You slept with Alec?"

"Yeah."

"What about… I thought you and Logan were okay?" Max reached into her jacket pocket.

"We're better than okay." She said, holding the ring out on her palm. Cindy looked from Max's face to the glittering item in her hand. Cautiously, she took it and held it up in front of her face. She gave a low whistle.

"When did this…"

"Last night." Max replied.

"And Alec…"

"Last night." Max repeated. Cindy held the ring back out to her, and Max slipped it back into her pocket.

"That's quite a mess you're in." she stated. Max nodded. She hated not being able to read Cindy's reaction. She felt adrift, not sure what to say or how to act. "I always had a feeling that you and Alec had a connection, but Boo, the timing…"

"I know." Max agreed quietly.

"Does Alec know? About the ring?"

"He does. He didn't, when it… but he does now."

"Which came first?" Max frowned. "Alec or the ring? Which was first?"

"Logan." Max admitted. She tried not to acknowledge the wave of guilt that accompanied the admission.

"Hence the bad."

"Hence the bad." She agreed. "Do you hate me?" she asked tentatively. "Do you think I'm a terrible person?" Cindy cocked her head at that and her expression softened.

"I could never hate you, and it's not my place to judge your choices." She reached out and squeezed her friend's hand. "I'm just surprised, is all. I always thought you and Logan had this big love. The two of you have fought so hard for it, for so long. I thought that he was what you wanted. That the ring you're hiding in your pocket was where the two of you were headed. That any vibes I was getting between you and Alec would always fade away when you and Logan got your happy ending."

"I didn't even realise there were vibes."

"Tension, then. Pretty boy and all." Max pushed away the images that flooded in from last night. Pretty boy didn't quite do it justice.

"What do I do now?" There was no one else in the world that Max could imagine asking that question, and Cindy squeezed her hand again.

"You love him, right? Logan?"

"Yes." Said Max, in a small voice.

"Then you gotta figure this out, Boo. Because you've never been wasteful since I knew you, and I don't think you'd throw that away unless you got some good reason in here." Cindy pressed her fist to chest, over her heart. "Or in here." She touched a finger to her temple. Max blinked, the rest of her body too frozen by the words to react.

"Then…" she took a breath before she met Cindy's eyes again, "why?" Cindy shook head and gave a small shrug, lips pressed lightly together.

"I know how sparingly you give love away, Max. And how sparingly you accept it. But I can't answer the question of why you did what you did. Just like I can't tell you who you should want to be with. But if something in you is shying away from Logan right now, you need to figure out if its outta fear or something deeper than that. Only you can know if what you and Logan have is… I don't wanna use this word, but, broken. Or if you want to save it." Max felt tears welling, and closed her eyes to try and shut them down. She felt Cindy lean in, and then her best friend's arms were around her. Familiarity. Comfort. Love she understood.

She was scared, and not because she knew she would lose everything that she'd spent so long building with Logan. Though that was there too of course. She was scared because when she peeked into the rabbit hole that was her and Alec, it wasn't a black hole to who-knew-where. It was familiar, like Cindy. It was a path that she knew too well to fear, because it was Alec for all his goodness and all his flaws.

It was a remarkably easy path for her to trace.

And besides, this wasn't a choice based on courage alone.

But she had choices, bleak as they were. Tell Logan. Risk losing everything. He might be noble about it, try to brush it off as a lapse in judgement. Nothing was insurmountable in their relationship, they'd proved that. But then she'd lose Alec, even as a friend. Even if he, too, tried to be noble about it and still wanted to stay friends. It would just be too weird for the married lady to hang out with the guy she'd cheated with, right? If she tried, the strain on her and Logan might be too much anyway.

She could tell Logan, and not let him brush it off. But then, he might not do that anyway. He had every right to feel betrayed, because she had betrayed him. He had every right to never forgive her. She still wasn't sure that she would forgive herself. And if it broke down with Logan, would she turn to Alec then? Did she even want to? Would he want her to? Would he still want her, if he thought he was her second choice?

"Fuck." Max whispered.