Needing You
The cool weight of the Millennium Puzzle rested on Yugi's outstretched palm. The boy sighed and turned back to gaze at the night sky through his bedroom window. The stars, they were so pretty tonight, but Yugi hardly noticed them. His mind was numb from thinking too much during the day.
It began innocently enough. Yugi had just graduated along with Anzu, Honda, Bakura and Jounouchi. The senior had grown in stature and maturity so that he and his yami appeared to be reflections of each other. Anzu would often jokingly compare them to the angel and devil representation of conscience, making both hikari and yami smile at the private joke. At least, they used to. During much of Yugi's last year at high school, Yami had been growing more and more distant, fading into a silent brooding figure at the back of his mind. Any attempts on his hikari's part to draw him out ended in a sigh and the click of his soul room being closed. Yugi would spend hours sitting outside in the soft shifting glow of the hallway connecting the two soul rooms, watching the colors of his thoughts make the ornate carvings of Yami's soul door come alive with dancing shadows. Finally, he slipped his Shining Friendship card underneath the door. To his relief, Yami had improved slightly after the incident but then had withdrawn even deeper into his shell. The silence between yami and aibou hardened during the last few weeks of summer as Yugi's rejection turned to anger. Finally, the anger spilled over and Yugi had forced his way into yami's soul room to demand an answer. The boy found his darker half sitting against a faded door propped in the middle of the room that seemingly led nowhere. Yami's eyes were closed and his cheeks stained with dry tears. Anger swiftly changing to concern, Yugi knelt down beside the former pharaoh.
/Yami?/
The crimson eyes flashed open. Yugi had expected to see guilt and embarrassment over showing such emotional weakness. Yami's eyes, however, were far away.
/Yami, what's wrong? Where have you been these past few months?/ "Where are you now?" Yugi whispered softly. Slowly, the crimson eyes shifted back into focus and met violet ones. Both sets shone with sadness, one tender, the other ancient.
"Yugi, aibou, hikari." Yami smiled slightly as the younger boy pulled him into a fierce hug and cried and apologized into his shoulder. The twins sat in front of the dull golden door like this until Yugi's sobs were reduced to shudders. "Yugi," Yami tried again, shifting his aibou so that crimson met violet again. "You've grown up so much. Two feet to be exact." A soft chuckle.
//You know what I mean.// Yugi nodded, slightly confused. He heard in Yami's words a feeling of finality and it scared him. Suddenly, a revelation gripped him. He's leaving. Yugi had known it all along, read it in Yami's behavior in the past few months, the familiar dreams of Egypt he had every night in which a tri-colored hair boy played among the sand and grew up to be a king. But he had refused to accept it. Now, hearing Yami's words, the finality of his leaving covered him like a velvet blanket, suffocating him and making him feel drowsy, etherized.
"Yes, I do, Yami." He knew. They both knew.
Yami slowly got up from the floor, wincing slightly as underused joints popped in protest. Yugi also stood up and noticed that the other boy was holding a golden key with the sennet eye engraved on the key head. Yami saw Yugi look curiously at the key.
"Yugi, I told you before that I could never remember my past." Yugi nodded. "A year ago, after your ordeal in the shadow realm (A/N: for another fic I'm writing, hopefully =), the goddess Isis came to me in a dream and gave me this key. She told me that it would unlock my past, the door in front of us. When I woke up, I found the key in my hand and a door in the middle of my soul room." The two stared at the door. Yugi was afraid that Yami would open it and they would be pulled in by the sands of time. Yami smiled.
"No, aibou, I was not allowed through the door. But I was allowed to see my past." With that, Yami inserted the key into the door. It swung open and a white light poured out, blinding Yugi. Feeling a light touch on his shoulder, Yugi opened his eyes and saw that they were in ancient Egypt. The airy marble hall the two were standing in was obviously the palace, decorated with luxurious cloths and golden ornaments. A slight hint of incense perfumed the air as Yugi turned towards a shout coming from the other end of the hall. He saw a much younger version of Yami (or was it himself?) rush out of the ceremony room with an ankh and a stick of incense, followed by a huffing and very mad priest that looked shockingly similar to Kaiba. Yugi stepped back as the child ran towards him and widened his eyes in surprise as the past Yami ran through him, still pursued by the enraged Kaiba.
"We are visiting the past. This is not real, only memories," Yami explained. He smiled. "Gods, I was a little devil back then. That's probably why Kaiba's obsessed with beating you, he could never catch me when I was young." Yugi chuckled at the thought of a chibi Yami smirking at a Kaiba that had no hope of finding him in the vast Egyptian palace. The scene faded.
Yugi found himself in the center of an elaborate throne room. Seated on the high throne was the Pharaoh of Egypt, Yami's father. He was administering justice to the commoners with Yami and his queen by his side. The event passed in fast forward and night quickly fell. The people had cleared the atrium, leaving the royal family alone. The young Yami's bored expression changed to one of joy as he scooted off his golden seat and pounced onto his father's lap. Slightly surprised, the pharaoh smiled indulgently as his son began to chat incessantly about his day. The current Yami, standing beside Yugi, smiled warmly at the scene.
"I loved my father. He was a strict but just ruler but more importantly, he took the time to be a father." Yami closed his eyes and relished the affection. Yugi glanced at his aibou, then back at the young Yami, who was pulling his father down from the steps towards the gardens. He felt a sense of familiarity then realized that he had seen these events before, during his dreams of Egypt. He had known seen Yami's life unfurl but could never remember them clearly in the morning. Somehow, seeing Yami's past, the past of his own past life, was comforting. He had never known a lot about his yami, and the darker side was never very talkative about his past simply because he did not remember it. Seeing Yami as a child with loving parents and a wild streak for trouble made Yugi love Yami even more. (A/N: not shouen-ai! This is strictly a brotherly/familial love). In so many ways, they were alike. One dark and one light, they were the same.
Again, the scene blurred and the two were relocated on the pinnacle of a pyramid in a small ceremonial tent. An older Yami, roughly the same age as Yugi was now, was dressed in kingly robes and adorned with golden jewelry. He wore a serious expression as an older man, Kaiba dressed in priest's robes, approached him.
"This is the ceremony in which I was crowned pharaoh," Yugi heard Yami explain softly. "My father had just died. He had tried to seal the Shadow Games but failed. He paid with his soul." The pain in the darker half's voice glowed as red as Yami's crimson eyes. Yugi watched the solemn young pharaoh receive the crown of Egypt and the traditional crook and ankh of power in an elaborate ceremony. Phalanxed by the high priests, including a grey-haired Seto Kaiba, the pharaoh walked regally down the steps of the pyramid to greet the joyous crowd gathered to celebrate the occasion. Although the air was festive, the scene was completely silent, save for the pounding footsteps of the pharaoh and the faint roar of a quickly beating heart. Yugi glanced sideways at Yami, who was watching the procession intently. He could still see the noble lines of aristocracy in his features and the confidence of his proud bearing put to rest all doubts that he was once a great ruler of Egypt. Sensing Yugi's eyes on him, the former pharaoh looked at his aibou.
"Yugi." The word seemed to destroy the sacred silence of the memory. //What do you see?//
/I've seen this memory before, in my dreams./ Yami looked slightly surprised by this. /I guess the Millennium Puzzle connects us in a lot of ways besides telepathically. But I've never seen this memory so clearly before./ Turning back to the image of the young pharaoh disappearing in the crowd, Yugi sighed. /You were so brave to continue after your father's death. That's what I identify you by, Yami: courage. You were always the brave one, the one that stood up for me in duels and protected me from danger. I could have never done the things you did./
The scene melted again and Yugi found himself in the heart of a pyramid, in the burial chamber of the pharaoh. He could see the ornate stone sarcophagus in the middle, the room aglow with the soft light of torches. A soft rustle on stone to the left; Yugi turned to see the past Yami. The pharaoh's ceremonial robes were replaced by a plain cotton skirt and he was bare of all jewelry. The traditional black kohl outlining his eyes were smudged and ran down his face, evidence of recently shed tears. The youth approached the coffin reverently and dropped to his knees, laying his head and hands down on the death mask. Quietly, he began to cry.
"I'm not always brave, Yugi." Hikari and yami turned to face each other. "When my father died, I felt lost, alone and afraid, very much like you did before you solved the Millennium Puzzle. I may seem courageous and confident, but even the most lion-hearted of us feel fear." The darker side placed a hand on his aibou's shoulder. "It is not a weakness to fear, Yugi. But you must remember that fear will only conquer you if you let it." Yugi nodded. He was still reeling from the impact of seeing Yami cry. He had always believed that his darker self was infallible in his courage, his confidence a diamond. Although he loved Yami as a brother and respected him as an elder, Yugi had always worshipped Yami as an idol. He had to admit that, as a young boy, he could not help but look to the Millennium spirit as the perfect role model. Yami had been what Yugi had always wanted to be: bold, courageous, smart, confident. For the longest time, he had desired more than anything to emulate his darker self, to become Yami. Seeing that Yami had flaws, like himself, made him seem more human, less as an ideal. Although the sight of his darker self crying brought a dull pain to his own heart, Yugi was glad that Yami had enough trust in him to reveal such a vulnerable side. The shared pain brought light and dark closer together but it also made the moment bitter. Having just discovered the full extent of Yami's character, Yugi was reminded that their time together was growing short. He willed away the tears in his eyes and smiled at his aibou. Taking Yami's hand from his shoulder, they entered the last memory hand in hand.
They were back on top of the pyramid. Instead of cornflower blue skies and smiling peasant faces, a storm swirled the dark sands of Egypt in a fury and the streets were empty of people. Squinting his eyes slightly, Yugi could make out seven figures gathered together in the middle of the ceremonial podium. He saw that they were surrounding seven golden objects: the Millennium artifacts. A faint chanting could be heard above the howling of the winds. Yugi felt Yami tense noticeably as the memory unfolded. Slowly, the dark storm grew in fury until the chanting was buried in the currents of wind. The figures each took a ceremonial dagger and slashed their wrists, spilling blood over the gold items. Suddenly, the seven figures flashed brightly, the Sennen eye engraved in light upon each of their foreheads. The light pierced the center of the storm above the pinnacle of the pyramid and the shadows broke. The storm abruptly quieted. The sand, no longer held up by the wind, fell back to the ground, revealing seven figures prone on the pyramid floor. Gently, the bodies faded, the pharaoh's body the last to disappear. The symbols of the Sennen eye on each golden item flashed briefly as all seven of the sacrificed souls were claimed in order to seal the Shadow Realm. The memory bleached white and faded. Yugi suddenly found himself staring at the dull gold of the memory door in Yami's soul room, still clutching the hand of his darker self.
"That. is how I died." Yami's voice was quiet, his crimson eyes closed. He waited until Yugi had controlled his muffled crying, then turned to his aibou, his eyes opening in a flash of sad red. Yugi dreaded the next words.
"Yugi, I love you as a friend, a son and a brother. You are my other half. I was brought here to help you but I am no longer needed." Seeing Yugi begin to protest, Yami held up his hand. "It is true. Yugi, aibou: I want to go home. But I am bound to the puzzle. I.I need you to set me free. Let my spirit go from your heart." Yami watched as Yugi put his head into his hands to stifle the sobs. It tore his hear to see his aibou crying, but he knew he had to suffer this pain. It was the last trial to prove that Yugi was ready to continue without Yami. The younger boy backed up slowly until he had reached the exit of the soul room. He left wordlessly.
Yugi had shut himself up in his room for an entire week. Anzu, Honda, Bakura, and Jounouchi had gone to visit him and he had explained Yami's decision. The game king had come out briefly to say goodbye to his friends while Yugi paced in the confines of his soul room. After the tearful farewell, Yugi re-emerged.
"I never thought he would leave," said a shocked Anzu, wiping tears from her eyes with a sleeve. The four other boys nodded.
"I.I don't want him to go," Yugi said softly.
"Yugi, we know." Anzu enveloped the boy into a comforting hug.
"Yug, we know it must be hard for ya. But ya have to understand, Yami's given so much to us already. It's time that we gave somethin' back to him. After all," Jou joked, "he's gotta be bored to death after five millennia stuck in a puzzle."
"I don't want to understand!" Yugi violently tore himself away from Anzu and slammed his hand into a wall, making his knuckles bleed. "He said he would always be there for me! But how can he if he's leaving me? Don't make me understand.please, I don't want to understand." He sank to the floor crying. Bakura timidly approached Yugi and placed an arm around his shoulders.
"Yugi, we understand this is hard for you. But Yami will never leave you. He is the other half of yourself. You might not be able to talk to him or feel his presence, but he is you and you are him. You will always remain hikari and yami." Bakura could almost feel his own yami's approval. Yami Bakura had left a while ago but the white-haired boy knew that he could never truly leave. Bakura still wandered his yami's empty soul room from time to time to taste the lingering touches of his yami's presence. He found life without a yami to be a bit lonely, but knew he had to move on, with the help of his friends. He hoped that Yugi would understand.
"But I need him. I can't be hikari without Yami. Without him. I'm nothing."
"That's not true!" Anzu exclaimed. "Yugi, you are in every way as great as Yami. You taught me the power of friendship. You taught Jou to have confidence in himself. You taught Tristan compassion. You gave Bakura strength to stand up to his fears. You don't need Yami anymore, Yugi, not in the way you think. He needs you, right now, to help him. It's time to let him go."
After his friends had left, Yugi spent the rest of the day sitting on his windowsill. The meals Sugouroku brought him remained untouched as the youth stared out the window, eyes lost in thought and Millennium puzzle resting in his hand.
How can I let him go? I need him.Yugi knew he had to face his own truth.
No, I don't need him. I just can't bear the thought of life without him. He was there when no one else was. We are two halves to a whole. But if he leaves, will I be whole without him and him whole without me?
Yami was sitting on the floor of his soul room, back leaning against the memory door, key in hand. His crimson eyes jumped open as he heard the door open and got up. Without a word, Yugi pulled his aibou into a tight hug. When they had separated, Yugi spoke.
"Yami, I'm sorry for being so selfish. I understand now that I.have to let you go." He brushed the tears from his eyes and continued. "I.I just want to say arigatou for everything. Most of all, for teaching me how to live."
"Aibou, it is you who has taught me how to live. Without you, I would have never had a second chance to learn to love." The two embraced again. "Arigatou, aibou. Ashiteru."
Yugi broke the hug first and struggled to remain composure. Taking a couple of deep breaths to calm his shakiness, he took the key from Yami's hand. He knew what to do, as if by instinct. Inserting the key into the memory door, he unlocked it. The door swung open to reveal a gentle radiance, the portal to the realm of souls.
"We will meet again, Yugi, in another life, in another time, in another form. But I'll always be with you, aibou." Smiling one last time at Yugi, Yami stepped through the door and melted into the light. I'll always be with you.
Yugi found himself on the floor of his bedroom, the key still in his hand and cheeks wet with tears. Curling around the now-cold Millennium Puzzle, he cried himself to sleep.
The late-afternoon sun reflected the gold of the puzzle into Yugi's eyes, causing him to wake up. His cheeks were puffy from crying and he felt empty. Yugi dragged himself up and sat with his back to his bed. Fresh tears were threatening to spill after he remembered last night's events. But, to his surprise, he found the strength to feel glad for Yami. He knew that Yami's soul was finally free of burden. Yugi felt that Yami had returned home.
On a burst of effort, he pushed himself off the floor and shuffled to the bathroom to splash cool water over his face. Looking up at the mirror, Yugi gasped as he saw Yami's crimson eyes staring at him in the mirror's reflection. The image smiled, then faded, leaving the reflection of a shocked violet-eyed boy.
I'll always be with you.
For the first time in a long while, Yugi smiled. He felt whole.
The cool weight of the Millennium Puzzle rested on Yugi's outstretched palm. The boy sighed and turned back to gaze at the night sky through his bedroom window. The stars, they were so pretty tonight, but Yugi hardly noticed them. His mind was numb from thinking too much during the day.
It began innocently enough. Yugi had just graduated along with Anzu, Honda, Bakura and Jounouchi. The senior had grown in stature and maturity so that he and his yami appeared to be reflections of each other. Anzu would often jokingly compare them to the angel and devil representation of conscience, making both hikari and yami smile at the private joke. At least, they used to. During much of Yugi's last year at high school, Yami had been growing more and more distant, fading into a silent brooding figure at the back of his mind. Any attempts on his hikari's part to draw him out ended in a sigh and the click of his soul room being closed. Yugi would spend hours sitting outside in the soft shifting glow of the hallway connecting the two soul rooms, watching the colors of his thoughts make the ornate carvings of Yami's soul door come alive with dancing shadows. Finally, he slipped his Shining Friendship card underneath the door. To his relief, Yami had improved slightly after the incident but then had withdrawn even deeper into his shell. The silence between yami and aibou hardened during the last few weeks of summer as Yugi's rejection turned to anger. Finally, the anger spilled over and Yugi had forced his way into yami's soul room to demand an answer. The boy found his darker half sitting against a faded door propped in the middle of the room that seemingly led nowhere. Yami's eyes were closed and his cheeks stained with dry tears. Anger swiftly changing to concern, Yugi knelt down beside the former pharaoh.
/Yami?/
The crimson eyes flashed open. Yugi had expected to see guilt and embarrassment over showing such emotional weakness. Yami's eyes, however, were far away.
/Yami, what's wrong? Where have you been these past few months?/ "Where are you now?" Yugi whispered softly. Slowly, the crimson eyes shifted back into focus and met violet ones. Both sets shone with sadness, one tender, the other ancient.
"Yugi, aibou, hikari." Yami smiled slightly as the younger boy pulled him into a fierce hug and cried and apologized into his shoulder. The twins sat in front of the dull golden door like this until Yugi's sobs were reduced to shudders. "Yugi," Yami tried again, shifting his aibou so that crimson met violet again. "You've grown up so much. Two feet to be exact." A soft chuckle.
//You know what I mean.// Yugi nodded, slightly confused. He heard in Yami's words a feeling of finality and it scared him. Suddenly, a revelation gripped him. He's leaving. Yugi had known it all along, read it in Yami's behavior in the past few months, the familiar dreams of Egypt he had every night in which a tri-colored hair boy played among the sand and grew up to be a king. But he had refused to accept it. Now, hearing Yami's words, the finality of his leaving covered him like a velvet blanket, suffocating him and making him feel drowsy, etherized.
"Yes, I do, Yami." He knew. They both knew.
Yami slowly got up from the floor, wincing slightly as underused joints popped in protest. Yugi also stood up and noticed that the other boy was holding a golden key with the sennet eye engraved on the key head. Yami saw Yugi look curiously at the key.
"Yugi, I told you before that I could never remember my past." Yugi nodded. "A year ago, after your ordeal in the shadow realm (A/N: for another fic I'm writing, hopefully =), the goddess Isis came to me in a dream and gave me this key. She told me that it would unlock my past, the door in front of us. When I woke up, I found the key in my hand and a door in the middle of my soul room." The two stared at the door. Yugi was afraid that Yami would open it and they would be pulled in by the sands of time. Yami smiled.
"No, aibou, I was not allowed through the door. But I was allowed to see my past." With that, Yami inserted the key into the door. It swung open and a white light poured out, blinding Yugi. Feeling a light touch on his shoulder, Yugi opened his eyes and saw that they were in ancient Egypt. The airy marble hall the two were standing in was obviously the palace, decorated with luxurious cloths and golden ornaments. A slight hint of incense perfumed the air as Yugi turned towards a shout coming from the other end of the hall. He saw a much younger version of Yami (or was it himself?) rush out of the ceremony room with an ankh and a stick of incense, followed by a huffing and very mad priest that looked shockingly similar to Kaiba. Yugi stepped back as the child ran towards him and widened his eyes in surprise as the past Yami ran through him, still pursued by the enraged Kaiba.
"We are visiting the past. This is not real, only memories," Yami explained. He smiled. "Gods, I was a little devil back then. That's probably why Kaiba's obsessed with beating you, he could never catch me when I was young." Yugi chuckled at the thought of a chibi Yami smirking at a Kaiba that had no hope of finding him in the vast Egyptian palace. The scene faded.
Yugi found himself in the center of an elaborate throne room. Seated on the high throne was the Pharaoh of Egypt, Yami's father. He was administering justice to the commoners with Yami and his queen by his side. The event passed in fast forward and night quickly fell. The people had cleared the atrium, leaving the royal family alone. The young Yami's bored expression changed to one of joy as he scooted off his golden seat and pounced onto his father's lap. Slightly surprised, the pharaoh smiled indulgently as his son began to chat incessantly about his day. The current Yami, standing beside Yugi, smiled warmly at the scene.
"I loved my father. He was a strict but just ruler but more importantly, he took the time to be a father." Yami closed his eyes and relished the affection. Yugi glanced at his aibou, then back at the young Yami, who was pulling his father down from the steps towards the gardens. He felt a sense of familiarity then realized that he had seen these events before, during his dreams of Egypt. He had known seen Yami's life unfurl but could never remember them clearly in the morning. Somehow, seeing Yami's past, the past of his own past life, was comforting. He had never known a lot about his yami, and the darker side was never very talkative about his past simply because he did not remember it. Seeing Yami as a child with loving parents and a wild streak for trouble made Yugi love Yami even more. (A/N: not shouen-ai! This is strictly a brotherly/familial love). In so many ways, they were alike. One dark and one light, they were the same.
Again, the scene blurred and the two were relocated on the pinnacle of a pyramid in a small ceremonial tent. An older Yami, roughly the same age as Yugi was now, was dressed in kingly robes and adorned with golden jewelry. He wore a serious expression as an older man, Kaiba dressed in priest's robes, approached him.
"This is the ceremony in which I was crowned pharaoh," Yugi heard Yami explain softly. "My father had just died. He had tried to seal the Shadow Games but failed. He paid with his soul." The pain in the darker half's voice glowed as red as Yami's crimson eyes. Yugi watched the solemn young pharaoh receive the crown of Egypt and the traditional crook and ankh of power in an elaborate ceremony. Phalanxed by the high priests, including a grey-haired Seto Kaiba, the pharaoh walked regally down the steps of the pyramid to greet the joyous crowd gathered to celebrate the occasion. Although the air was festive, the scene was completely silent, save for the pounding footsteps of the pharaoh and the faint roar of a quickly beating heart. Yugi glanced sideways at Yami, who was watching the procession intently. He could still see the noble lines of aristocracy in his features and the confidence of his proud bearing put to rest all doubts that he was once a great ruler of Egypt. Sensing Yugi's eyes on him, the former pharaoh looked at his aibou.
"Yugi." The word seemed to destroy the sacred silence of the memory. //What do you see?//
/I've seen this memory before, in my dreams./ Yami looked slightly surprised by this. /I guess the Millennium Puzzle connects us in a lot of ways besides telepathically. But I've never seen this memory so clearly before./ Turning back to the image of the young pharaoh disappearing in the crowd, Yugi sighed. /You were so brave to continue after your father's death. That's what I identify you by, Yami: courage. You were always the brave one, the one that stood up for me in duels and protected me from danger. I could have never done the things you did./
The scene melted again and Yugi found himself in the heart of a pyramid, in the burial chamber of the pharaoh. He could see the ornate stone sarcophagus in the middle, the room aglow with the soft light of torches. A soft rustle on stone to the left; Yugi turned to see the past Yami. The pharaoh's ceremonial robes were replaced by a plain cotton skirt and he was bare of all jewelry. The traditional black kohl outlining his eyes were smudged and ran down his face, evidence of recently shed tears. The youth approached the coffin reverently and dropped to his knees, laying his head and hands down on the death mask. Quietly, he began to cry.
"I'm not always brave, Yugi." Hikari and yami turned to face each other. "When my father died, I felt lost, alone and afraid, very much like you did before you solved the Millennium Puzzle. I may seem courageous and confident, but even the most lion-hearted of us feel fear." The darker side placed a hand on his aibou's shoulder. "It is not a weakness to fear, Yugi. But you must remember that fear will only conquer you if you let it." Yugi nodded. He was still reeling from the impact of seeing Yami cry. He had always believed that his darker self was infallible in his courage, his confidence a diamond. Although he loved Yami as a brother and respected him as an elder, Yugi had always worshipped Yami as an idol. He had to admit that, as a young boy, he could not help but look to the Millennium spirit as the perfect role model. Yami had been what Yugi had always wanted to be: bold, courageous, smart, confident. For the longest time, he had desired more than anything to emulate his darker self, to become Yami. Seeing that Yami had flaws, like himself, made him seem more human, less as an ideal. Although the sight of his darker self crying brought a dull pain to his own heart, Yugi was glad that Yami had enough trust in him to reveal such a vulnerable side. The shared pain brought light and dark closer together but it also made the moment bitter. Having just discovered the full extent of Yami's character, Yugi was reminded that their time together was growing short. He willed away the tears in his eyes and smiled at his aibou. Taking Yami's hand from his shoulder, they entered the last memory hand in hand.
They were back on top of the pyramid. Instead of cornflower blue skies and smiling peasant faces, a storm swirled the dark sands of Egypt in a fury and the streets were empty of people. Squinting his eyes slightly, Yugi could make out seven figures gathered together in the middle of the ceremonial podium. He saw that they were surrounding seven golden objects: the Millennium artifacts. A faint chanting could be heard above the howling of the winds. Yugi felt Yami tense noticeably as the memory unfolded. Slowly, the dark storm grew in fury until the chanting was buried in the currents of wind. The figures each took a ceremonial dagger and slashed their wrists, spilling blood over the gold items. Suddenly, the seven figures flashed brightly, the Sennen eye engraved in light upon each of their foreheads. The light pierced the center of the storm above the pinnacle of the pyramid and the shadows broke. The storm abruptly quieted. The sand, no longer held up by the wind, fell back to the ground, revealing seven figures prone on the pyramid floor. Gently, the bodies faded, the pharaoh's body the last to disappear. The symbols of the Sennen eye on each golden item flashed briefly as all seven of the sacrificed souls were claimed in order to seal the Shadow Realm. The memory bleached white and faded. Yugi suddenly found himself staring at the dull gold of the memory door in Yami's soul room, still clutching the hand of his darker self.
"That. is how I died." Yami's voice was quiet, his crimson eyes closed. He waited until Yugi had controlled his muffled crying, then turned to his aibou, his eyes opening in a flash of sad red. Yugi dreaded the next words.
"Yugi, I love you as a friend, a son and a brother. You are my other half. I was brought here to help you but I am no longer needed." Seeing Yugi begin to protest, Yami held up his hand. "It is true. Yugi, aibou: I want to go home. But I am bound to the puzzle. I.I need you to set me free. Let my spirit go from your heart." Yami watched as Yugi put his head into his hands to stifle the sobs. It tore his hear to see his aibou crying, but he knew he had to suffer this pain. It was the last trial to prove that Yugi was ready to continue without Yami. The younger boy backed up slowly until he had reached the exit of the soul room. He left wordlessly.
Yugi had shut himself up in his room for an entire week. Anzu, Honda, Bakura, and Jounouchi had gone to visit him and he had explained Yami's decision. The game king had come out briefly to say goodbye to his friends while Yugi paced in the confines of his soul room. After the tearful farewell, Yugi re-emerged.
"I never thought he would leave," said a shocked Anzu, wiping tears from her eyes with a sleeve. The four other boys nodded.
"I.I don't want him to go," Yugi said softly.
"Yugi, we know." Anzu enveloped the boy into a comforting hug.
"Yug, we know it must be hard for ya. But ya have to understand, Yami's given so much to us already. It's time that we gave somethin' back to him. After all," Jou joked, "he's gotta be bored to death after five millennia stuck in a puzzle."
"I don't want to understand!" Yugi violently tore himself away from Anzu and slammed his hand into a wall, making his knuckles bleed. "He said he would always be there for me! But how can he if he's leaving me? Don't make me understand.please, I don't want to understand." He sank to the floor crying. Bakura timidly approached Yugi and placed an arm around his shoulders.
"Yugi, we understand this is hard for you. But Yami will never leave you. He is the other half of yourself. You might not be able to talk to him or feel his presence, but he is you and you are him. You will always remain hikari and yami." Bakura could almost feel his own yami's approval. Yami Bakura had left a while ago but the white-haired boy knew that he could never truly leave. Bakura still wandered his yami's empty soul room from time to time to taste the lingering touches of his yami's presence. He found life without a yami to be a bit lonely, but knew he had to move on, with the help of his friends. He hoped that Yugi would understand.
"But I need him. I can't be hikari without Yami. Without him. I'm nothing."
"That's not true!" Anzu exclaimed. "Yugi, you are in every way as great as Yami. You taught me the power of friendship. You taught Jou to have confidence in himself. You taught Tristan compassion. You gave Bakura strength to stand up to his fears. You don't need Yami anymore, Yugi, not in the way you think. He needs you, right now, to help him. It's time to let him go."
After his friends had left, Yugi spent the rest of the day sitting on his windowsill. The meals Sugouroku brought him remained untouched as the youth stared out the window, eyes lost in thought and Millennium puzzle resting in his hand.
How can I let him go? I need him.Yugi knew he had to face his own truth.
No, I don't need him. I just can't bear the thought of life without him. He was there when no one else was. We are two halves to a whole. But if he leaves, will I be whole without him and him whole without me?
Yami was sitting on the floor of his soul room, back leaning against the memory door, key in hand. His crimson eyes jumped open as he heard the door open and got up. Without a word, Yugi pulled his aibou into a tight hug. When they had separated, Yugi spoke.
"Yami, I'm sorry for being so selfish. I understand now that I.have to let you go." He brushed the tears from his eyes and continued. "I.I just want to say arigatou for everything. Most of all, for teaching me how to live."
"Aibou, it is you who has taught me how to live. Without you, I would have never had a second chance to learn to love." The two embraced again. "Arigatou, aibou. Ashiteru."
Yugi broke the hug first and struggled to remain composure. Taking a couple of deep breaths to calm his shakiness, he took the key from Yami's hand. He knew what to do, as if by instinct. Inserting the key into the memory door, he unlocked it. The door swung open to reveal a gentle radiance, the portal to the realm of souls.
"We will meet again, Yugi, in another life, in another time, in another form. But I'll always be with you, aibou." Smiling one last time at Yugi, Yami stepped through the door and melted into the light. I'll always be with you.
Yugi found himself on the floor of his bedroom, the key still in his hand and cheeks wet with tears. Curling around the now-cold Millennium Puzzle, he cried himself to sleep.
The late-afternoon sun reflected the gold of the puzzle into Yugi's eyes, causing him to wake up. His cheeks were puffy from crying and he felt empty. Yugi dragged himself up and sat with his back to his bed. Fresh tears were threatening to spill after he remembered last night's events. But, to his surprise, he found the strength to feel glad for Yami. He knew that Yami's soul was finally free of burden. Yugi felt that Yami had returned home.
On a burst of effort, he pushed himself off the floor and shuffled to the bathroom to splash cool water over his face. Looking up at the mirror, Yugi gasped as he saw Yami's crimson eyes staring at him in the mirror's reflection. The image smiled, then faded, leaving the reflection of a shocked violet-eyed boy.
I'll always be with you.
For the first time in a long while, Yugi smiled. He felt whole.