A cold breeze whispered across the dark glassy surface. Lights of red and white flared bright and powerful in the distance, but the gloom surrounding the solid darkness blocked all of it from ever touching the sleek glossiness. Slightly behind the ball of darkness, on its own plane, stood a sleek tower, it's clear black surface seeming to be transparent and solid at the same time. Loud voices from inside echoed softly before dying away.

"You are such a wimp!"

A man, standing six feet tall with slightly wavy black hair down to mid-neck looked up, black eyes inquiring. "Me?"

"Yes, you. I can't believe I ever spawned you!" A tall woman dressed in sleek black stood, glaring down. Her raven hair tumbled down past her bare shoulders. A slender finger was lifted, pointing across the room. "You can't control your lesser cousins as you should be able to…you can't even control your own followers—you're a failure!"

"I don't see you taking over the whole pantheon of the gods, O Queen of the Abyss—which I should add is no more that a very large, pink, and rather smelly litterbox. Five-headed dragon size, odd coincidence." Seeing Takhisis was speechless and spluttering, Nuitari continued smoothly.

"What do you mean unable to control my followers? Was I the one who won the 'largest number of converts to the opposite religion' award? No…I believe that was you. Five hundred followers all switching to Paladine. I should recommend you don't try to bake good-luck cupcakes for your armies again, Taky."

Small flames shot from Takhisis's eyes. "What about the mages who use dark magic without worshipping you? What of the black robes who go against you? I don't see you doing much to keep them in line."

Nuitari rolled his eyes, which had been liberally daubed with mascara and eyeshadow to give them a shadowed look. "The dark magic is all that matters. All that matters. The magic is my only love. It is. Yes." A glazed look began to spread over his face.

"Suure it is."

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

"Oh, just those rumors that have been swirling around." Takhisis made spirals in the air. "They say you're quite the mortal lover."

Nuitari chewed slightly on his lower lip. What? What is she talking about? Wait…could she know…No! I will not be distracted!. Remember, you are evil. Eeeevil. Must stay distant and scholarly and cruel and cold. The mantra, what was it?! Evil is my life, magic is my purpose, I control the magic, I am the most powerful god of magic, I magus…Wait! That's not me! Recovering his composure, Nuitari sniffed and stuck his nose in the air. "I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about."

Taky winked. "Don't worry. You know I totally approve of such dealings. As long as you don't make a mistake like…" Takhisis stopped, her lips twisting, smearing her black lipstick up her lip.

A sly smile. "Like Bast?"

"None of your business, brat!"

"Defeated by your own son, tsk tsk."

"At least I knew what I was doing when I fucked his father!"

Nuitari's eyes widened slightly. "Oh?"

The Queen of Darkness, pleased to have hit a nerve, continued, smiling smugly. " Oh yes. Quite in possession of my sanity. Now with Sargy…I believe I was drunk. Faerie wine. A bit dangerous, it makes the head spin. I believe your aunt got in trouble with that. Spiders and alcohol don't mix… So you see, son, you were a bit of an accident."

Nuitari, looking a teensy bit uncertain, asked, "But surely you would have done the same thing regardless of how drunk you were. " Alright, so it wasn't really a question.

"Weell, I don't think so. Why I would want to have a disgusting, insolent son like you? And the actual act was a bit hard. The feathers and beak…and those feet! Did you know condors pee on their feet?"

"No I didn't…disgusting? I'm not disgusting."

"Yes you are! You wear makeup!"

"So do you." Folded arms.

"It's not…I don't…you can't…" Finding herself once again at a loss of words, Takhisis settled for snapping, "Well, I wish I'd never had something like you!"

The effect was disturbing. Nuitari's eyes widened to an impossible size. Then they started shining, and a moment later a large, glistening, and highly dramatic tear slid down his cheek. The eye shadowing was not disturbed in the slightest. On the contrary, it appeared to cause parts of the tear to evaporate as it came down, sending a faint acid smell into the air.

"You…don't…love me?"

"I…" Taky was considering backing out of her disturbed son's moon and never coming back, but stuck to her normal, bitchy personality. "Of course I don't love you! I never have!"

Nuitari collapsed in tears, sniffling loudly. He sank slowly to the floor, head tilted back, with a recently appeared spotlight shining down on him. Then, to his mother's horror, he began to sing. "All alone in the daaarkness…All alone in the moooonlight…" His voice, while very appropriate for promising, lying, threatening, spellcasting, purring, and almost anything else, was not very appropriate for singing soppy songs. The notes came out soft and cold, and warbling horribly. It was somewhat equivalent to ice cubes put through a powerful suction.

Nuitari looked up through bleary eyes and stuck his hands out very slightly. Taky, growling and cursing under her breath, but willing to do anything to make him stop, stomped forward and hugged him. After her attempts to crush him failed, Takhisis stepped back, winced, and vanished to take a long, boiling-hot bath. Nuitari, still hiccupping a bit, went to bed with a glass of warm milk.