Disclaimer: I do not own said characters they belong to Toei/Bandai or whatever. The only thing I claim is my imagination.

AN: I am trying to make these chapters longer and more interesting. It's so hard when you're not used to writing this much. Sex takes place in this chapter, I'm sure some of you have been waiting for this. lol Any review and critique is appreciated. Enjoy!

Hate to Love You – Chapter 5

Kouji POV

The week could not go by any slower. Time always seems to go by much slower when people look forward to something and God makes it go by so slow on purpose. All I can think about is the weekend. Sure, Takuya and I have had sleep overs before, but this time is going to be different, because this time, we're a couple. Maybe not an official one though.

In the mornings, I meet up with Takuya about a block or two away from school and we usually walk together. Walks never usually mean anything, we're both tired and not looking forward to school, but that's just how it is. But now that we're going out, walks are different now. I get to spend time with him, and we talk, and it's just great. Except, like most couples do when they walk together, we don't hold hands. The morning after we met in the locker room, we met up as usual and began our march to hel- I mean school. I don't know what came over me, maybe it was a natural 'boyfriend instinct', but suddenly I had moved closer to him and grabbed his hand. I felt him tense up and he let my hand drop to my side. He looked at me, almost shamefully and said, "Not in public, okay?"

That totally didn't kill my day.

So now I'm trying to teach myself to not be affectionate when other people are around.

But really.

What the actual fuck.

Not being able to hold hands, or even peck him on the cheek when I want to is more wrong to me than how some people see homosexuals. Seriously, I should be allowed to hold him and love him how I want and when I want. But out of respect for him, I have to force myself to hold back. And for the one of the few times in my life, it really hurts. But what can you do, you know? He's not ready to 'come out' yet, I don't blame him, but at the same time, he shouldn't care. He wouldn't care, I don't know, I've noticed he's different with me. Usually he's not the kind of guy to care what other people think of him, but when he's with me, that changes, and he becomes slightly insecure.

The days pass by ever slowly, and it's getting really hard to contain my excitement. The last day of school finally comes and I decide to go over to Takuya's house tomorrow morning instead of walking home with him right after class. Today I'm walking home with Kouichi, I don't want him to get the idea that I'm ignoring him or anything. We decide to take a break at a little coffee shop before we head our separate ways. We sit in the corner booth, we both like our privacy. He and I are so much alike, yet we are so different.

"Say, how do you think you did on the English test?" he asks while he plays with the straw in his mouth.

"Well, the short answer section was kind of confusing. They should have reworded most of that, but to be honest, I feel that's the only thing on the whole test I might have missed. It was fairly easy. How 'bout you Nii-san?"

He stirs the ice in his cup and ponders for a few moments. "I actually thought that short answer was really easy! It stumped me at first, but I reread it about a thousand times before I finally understood. I'm sure I missed a few questions, but overall it should not have affected my score too much." He begins to nibble on some cookies, and looks at me wide eyed.

"Say, little brother, I've been meaning to ask you something." Crumbs fall onto his shirt.

"Eh what is it?" The question didn't really concern me much, so I didn't pay much attention and decided to look out the window at all the people walking around like there's no tomorrow.

"Forgive me if I'm wrong, but lately, I get this feeling like…you're hiding something from me?"

I freeze up.

I don't understand. I haven't made it that obvious have I? I haven't even talked to my brother or seen him that much lately because of all the work from class we've been getting. There's no way he could know about Takuya and I!

Gah Kouji, keep your cool!

I continue to stare outside, pretending like I'm focusing on what's out there, but I know I'm not thinking about the passersby. A let out a sigh and turn to him and put my elbow the table so I can rest my head on my arm.

"Huh? And what do you think I'm keeping from you?"

"Erhm…well I don't know, I just have this feeling you're not being completely honest with me Kouji."

I raise a brow and roll my eyes.

"You don't even know what you're talking about Kouichi, so why accuse me of something like that?"

"I never accused you, I just said I felt like y-"

"Kouichi, I'm not hiding or keeping anything from you okay? I don't know where you got that idea. You know I don't keep secrets from you."

He looked down at his lap and then back to me. He smiled, but it was a sad one.

"I know Kouji, I'm sorry….forget I asked! Ha ha, well let's just finish up. Kaa-san is expecting me home by now."

We finished eating what was left of the cookies, and threw our coffees out. I know I have hurt his feelings by snapping at him. I get he's only trying to look out for me, but there's so much he doesn't understand.

I'm sorry Kouichi.

We make our way out and continue to walk another block further where we say our good byes. Now I'm left to walk home by myself. That's alright, you probably know I don't mind being alone. But for once, I really do feel lonely. I look at the sun setting into the orange horizon trying to process all the thoughts running through my head.

xxx

Sunday comes faster than I expected. The sun shine peaks through my curtains and I roll over lazily. I'm so tired; I don't remember sleeping last night at all. I thought about Takuya and my conversation with Kouichi from the day before. I still feel bad, but I know he's probably over it. I know it may seem like a different story to you, but he really isn't one to hold grudges. Especially things like this. I sit up and look down at my phone on the night stand.

From: Kouichi Kimura 10:23AM

Hey Nii-chan! Just wanted to say we need to go back to that place for coffee again, their iced coffee is better than Starbucks. lol Anyway have fun with Takuya later, see you at school tomorrow!

I sighed with relief; it's good to see him in a good mood. I really do hope he's not upset with me. There's no time to sit around and feel bad, I said what I said. Oh well. It's not like I can take it back.

I take my time getting ready. I'm supposed to come over after lunch because Takuya has a lot of chores to do before we can hang out. I shower, get my overnight bag ready, eat a small breakfast, and make my way over to Takuya's. I'm really anxious. He said his parents will be out most of the day, and his little brother is going to a birthday party, so it's going to be just the two of us. I can't wait! We haven't had any time to ourselves in a long time, and now that we're dating, time together is definitely going to be…

different.

I get to Takuya's doorstep and take a big breath and knock on the door.

"COME IN!" I hear him yell.

I leave my shoes on the door and find him in the kitchen, cleaning after a huge mess on the counter.

"Uh you need any help there..?"

He's covered in powder and there's something dripping onto the floor.

"My mom is going to FREAK the fuck out if she comes home and sees this! Can you get the mop from the closet?!" He scurries to the sink and sponges up the mess on the counter top, and I come back with the ever important mop.

"So what happened? The Pillsbury dough boy wage war on you?"

"Ha ha, NO. Funny man, here I go out of my way to make you a cake, and you poke fun at me?" he says jokingly, "Just help me clean up. If my mom sees this, she's going to take my computer away. I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT MY INTERNET! I. CAN'T."

"Okay okay, geez, calm down, start over with the counters. Egg and shit is all over the floor now. I never figured you would be one to bake. So, where is that cake?" I was curious now, I didn't see it anywhere.

Takuya sighed and pointed with his eyes to the trash can.

"It didn't make it."

"Ouch. Sorry about that. Why didn't you just buy one from the store? It would've saved you the trouble."

"Because!" he whined as he wiped up the counter with a paper towel, "I wanted to make something for you, like it would be special cause…you know, I made it."

I looked away as I continued to mop. I could feel my face getting warm.

"B-baka…you shouldn't go out of your way to do things like that for me."

"But why not? I know you don't like that I get edgy about doing stuff in public. I wanted to make it up to ya!" he said and smiled cheekily. I shrug and finish mopping the floor from egg and bits and pieces of egg shell. He threw the soiled towels in the trash and walked over to me. I take a step back as he gets closer. He puts his hands on my shoulders and looks straight at me. I want to look away, but my eyes are locked with his.

"Kouji, I really love you, I hope you know that." His voices changes, it's softer and more lower in tone.

"Y-yeah I do know. I love you too Takuya."

He leans in and bumps his forehead against mine. By now I'm working up a sweat and I bet my face is beat red against my pale skin.

"I don't want you to ever think that you're not important. I hate seeing you depressed and I don't like when you shut me out. I really wish I could do more to make you happy."

"I-I am happy, I'm with you aren't I? We're together now. That's what makes me h-happy." Goddammit stop stuttering.

He nods and smiles. "I'm happy I'm with you too…let me show you how happy I am."

He inches closer and his lips brush against mine and he kisses me. Hard. My body tenses up, and my eyes close shut as we embrace each other with our mouths. He pulls away and takes my hand.

"C'mon! Let's go t-", before he could finish, he slipped over the wet floor I had just mopped, and falls backward, head first.

"Shit shit! Takuya! Oh my God! Takuya! I'm sorry! Takuya!"

He really took a hit to the head, and was out cold. I feel terrible! It's my fault he fell! I carefully pick him up, he's a bit heavy, and carry him over to the couch in the living room. I kiss his forehead and begin to finish cleaning the kitchen. It's the least I could do now…

About forty-five minutes later, I'm sitting on the couch watching TV, his head on my lap, and suddenly he wakes up.

"Ungh…geez…I really need to stop landing on my head…"

I look down and sigh with relief. I caress his cheek and he looks up at me innocently.

God he's adorable.

"Kou…ji…you're still here?"

"Of course I am you dork! You think I was going to leave?"

He sits up and rubs his head, looking into the kitchen.

"Awwh man! You didn't have to clean my house! I was going to finish up."

"It was just your kitchen."

"Yeah, but it was a war zone!"

I get up to pour him a glass of water and he follows.

"You really should lay down Taku-kun." I hand him a glass.

He blushes and sips while looking at me.

"Taku-kun?"

I look at the sink nervously. Uh..

"It just slipped it. I'll won't call you that if you-"

"No it's okay, it's kinda cute actually." He giggles and dumps the rest of the water in the sink and sits on the counter.

"You can be my Kou-chan then," he smirks.

"Ugh, Kou-chan? Can't you pick anything else?"

"Nope! You're going to have to deal with it Kou-chan!"

I punch his shoulder playfully, "You better not wear it out so fast!"

He winks at me and hopes off the counter and makes his way over to his room.

"C'mon then!"

I follow him and we sit on his bed and start playing video games. An hour or two in, he yawns and cracks his back and falls lazily back onto his bed. I pause the game and turn around, still sitting with my legs crossed. I can't help but yawn as well, it is contagious after all.

"Ahhhhh, shit, I'm tired. I don't wanna go to school tomorrowwwwww!" he whines.

I roll my eyes and get off the bed to go get a drink from the kitchen.

"Hey Kouji?"

"What?"

"Close the door."

I look at him confused and he is looking at me, with a serious face. So much for my drink. I'm thirsty, but from the looks of it, that's the last thing I should be worried about right now. When you want the door closed, that usually means something you're not supposed to be doing is going to happen. Right? I close the door and I'm about to turn around when he says, "Lock it too."

I lock the door anxiously and come back to him. He's sitting on the edge of his bed and smiles mischievously.

"Neh Kouji, I wanna play a different game now…" he smirks.

He unzips his jeans and waits for me to realize what he's getting at. I already had an idea when he wanted the door locked. I swallow nervously, and by instinct I kneel in front of him. I start to pull his jeans down, and he wiggles his way out of them. Now the bulge that was hiding in his pants is more visible and I can already feel my face getting hot again. My hands are shaking as I pull out his hardening cock out of his boxers. I really don't know what I'm doing to be honest. I've never done this before, but I guess it's just common sense what you're supposed to do. I start stroking his hardness slow and firmly. He lets out a low moan and he is looking down at me, watching me intently. My strokes begin to get faster, using both hands as I work his cock up and down.

"Unhh…Kouji…" he moans.

I decide to give my hands a break and I put his member in my mouth a little too eagerly. He moans my name again, closes his eyes and puts a hand on my head. I lick his shaft from the base of his cock all the way to his tip, and suck on the head that has already collected some pre cum. I try not to cringe at the taste; it's not very pleasant in my opinion, but whatever. I take his cock whole in my mouth and that really hits a spot. He moans louder and grabs my hair, pulling my head down onto his crotch. His cock goes farther into my throat and I try to hold back on choking. I fight against him and pull back, and I suckle on his tip. He continues to pull on my hair as I stroke and suck on him. My hard on below is desperate for attention, but I ignore it because I want Takuya to be impressed with how I can pleasure him. He still doesn't know I'm a virgin. I work with my mouth, swallowing him again and again, stroking him harder and faster.

"K-Kouji! I'm going to-"

Finally he grabs my hair tightly and lets out a loud moan and comes on my face before I can take him with my mouth one last time.

He pants as he tries to catch his breath, his hold on my hair becomes nonexistent. I'm a bit embarrassed with myself, I feel dirty and ashamed, but at the same time I'm very much aroused and I wanted to pleasure him more. I peer up at him, and he looks down at me with lust.

"Ready for round two?" he asks huskily as he wipes off the cum of the side of my mouth.

I get up, and remove my shirt and my pants and join him on the bed.

"I'm always ready."