And then Emily is kissing her, long and slow and careful, thumbs stroking over cheeks and arms tangling together. Their lips move slowly, savoring and caressing over fast and intense. Emily's arms slip around her neck and she can't help but release a content sigh into the contact because this was supposed to be a dream, not a reality. Paige tries to memorise the way Emily feels against her, to remember her touch incase she doesn't get the chance again.

"Are you okay?" Emily asks softly as they pull apart, and Paige laughs because of course she's okay. She's never been more okay in her life.

"I just…. wasn't expecting that," She laughs somewhat breathlessly, their hands still tangled together and their foreheads close.

"Well I hope it was a nice surprise," Emily jokes, her signature smile that Paige had always loved appearing on her face.

Paige only nods because she can't really think of anything else to say. Not when Emily is looking at her little breathlessly, with those big eyes almost sparkling against the light of the pool.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Emily asks and Paige resists the urge to kiss her again when she suddenly looks a little nervous and unsure of herself.

"I'm fine," she tells her with a smile. "I'm more than fine. That was…wow."

Emily laughs. "Wow...I like that."

"It was just a little unexpected," Paige blushes.

The other girl smiles warmly in response and Paige suddenly feels self-conscious under her gaze. She thinks she could live to one hundred and still never tire of Emily looking at her like that

"I missed you, Paige," Emily tells her.

The corners of Paige's mouth twitches up into a smile, hands shaking as she clings to few of the words from Emily's mouth. "You really missed me?"

Emily's eyes soften. "Is that so hard to believe?"

Paige shrugs, suddenly feeling smaller at Emily's concerned glare. "It's just…you're so perfect and I'm…." she pauses, unsure of how to correctly phrase awkward, clumsy, unfriendly, a coward so she settles for "…not."

"Nobody is perfect, Paige," Emily says.

"I know..." Paige starts before Emily can continue. "It's just…I keep messing everything up," she admits softly. "And everyday I regret everything I've done to you in the past," she explains purposely looking away from the other girl's stare. "You deserve better... You deserve so much because you've been through so much and you're so strong...You've been to hell and back and you deserve someone who is just as kind and brave and loving as you are."

"Paige," Emily says softly, and Paige looks up and suddenly feels silly under Emily's loving stare. "You're the bravest person I know."

Paige scoffs and looks away again. "No, please look at me," Emily tells her, taking her hands in her own. "You need to hear this."

"When I think about how far you've come…it makes me proud," she explains. "A year ago you were afraid to hold my hand and look at you now. And you did it alone…. because I walked away…"

"What? Emily, that's not what….

"Yes it is," Emily says, her voice tense and her eyes glistening with regret. "I never apologized. You were scared and alone and I walked away…I should've helped you the way Maya helped me. I'm so sorry I left you to deal with it all by yourself."

"Emily," Paige looks up and a shaky breath leaves her. Her heart was hammering in her chest as her voice cracks. "You don't ever have to apologize to me," she whispers softly.

"And you don't have to apologies to me," Emily says, holding Paige's hand so tight as if to convince her of the truth.

"Paige, you've made a few mistakes. It doesn't define you. What defines you is the person you are now. And personally, I think that person is pretty great."

Paige's smiles despite herself.

Emily grins. "That's better," she chuckles before she leans down and kisses her slowly. Everything feels more bearable, when she's holding onto Emily's hands. She squeezes them until her knuckles go white and she's panting, desperate to hold onto this moment.

"Okay so… I have an idea," Emily says with a smile when they break apart.

"Should I be scared?"

Emily doesn't respond. Instead, before Paige's very eyes the other girl pulls her t-shirt over her head and unzips her pants. "What…what are you doing!" Paige says while trying to avert her eyes.

"Going swimming." Emily says like it's the most obvious thing in the world. "Race you!"

Before she can respond, Emily dives head first into the water. She reaches the surface with a grin. "What are you waiting for, McCullers?" she teases urging the other girl into the pool.

Paige smiles, and wonders how she got so damn lucky. Her cheeks feel like they're a rosy warm pink and Emily is looking at her like she's the best thing in the world, and for a second, Paige almost believes her.