Disclaimer: I don't own Skins and all those things

Also, this is told from Franky's point of view. I just liked the who concept of not using names in this. I didn't edit it so I'm sorry.

"It just fucking hurts." I say to myself. I sit down against the wall. Breathe in, breathe out. In and out. I hide my face in my hands trying to collect my thoughts. Everything is pretty much screwed. At this point I really have no idea what I'm doing. She's doing this on purpose. I know she is. We both are so destructive to each other. All I can think of is her touch, her pulling me in close to her. She tried to comfort me. She knew what was wrong. She knew it was her. Everything has been about her.

I think back to yesterday, when I ended up at the club. I saw her dancing with some bloke. She was getting in to it, grinding up against him. I felt myself getting angry. I ran outside of the club, trying to calm down. When I get angry my throat closes and I can't breathe, it's more of a mixture of pain and anger. After a while of thinking about her I realized that I could never be what she needs. I could never be the one she would ever want to be with. There would always be someone better, someone who fits her better, someone who can get under her skin, someone not me. Thinking about it made tears swell up in my eyes. I was determined not to cry. I balled my fist hitting it against the wall softly. I never felt pain like this. I never knew someone could affect me this way.

She came out of the club. I could hear the distant thudding of the music as she closed the back door. Everyone sounded cheery and happy, way different than what I was feeling. She walked up to me.

"Hey what's wrong." She asked. I could tell by the look in her eyes that she was worried. She is always worrying.

"Nothing." I lied. I knew that she knew that I was into her. I was never really good at hiding my feelings. I don't show much emotion but when I have intense feelings I don't want to hide them. I would do little things and give off hints just to keep things interesting. She always noticed things like that. People don't realize how smart she can actually be. Most people think she is a cold-hearted bitch but she isn't. She is actually really sweet and protective when she wants to be. No one notices though. No one notices how much she cares for her friends. How she desperately tries to be accepted. How she goes through so much just to be anyone who isn't herself.

"I know you're lying." She said in her quiet tone of voice. She embraced my cheek and gave me a gentle smile. "You're always lying."

"I'm fine." I said not breaking our eye contact. She loves eye contact. It empowers her. It makes her seem way more confident in herself than she actually is.

"Come home with me." She said. It wasn't a question more like a plead. I nodded and she smiled pulling my hand into hers. We walked with silence between us towards her house. She opened the door and walked me up to her room. She took of her shoes and sat down on her bed. Her room was full of pink. On her walls were pictures of her and her friends. She and I weren't the best of friends when I got here. She was actually really bitchy to me. It didn't bother me that much though, to be honest. I could tell there was something more to her.

I sat down next to her. She pulled her back out of her face. "Now are you going to tell me what is actually wrong with you?"

"Nothing is wrong." I said once again. She sighed in response. I knew she got frustrated with me a lot. I knew that I annoyed the hell out of her sometimes. What was I supposed to say? I'm sorry I can't be around you because all I can think about is how much I need you. Then I think about how I'm not good enough for you. I know deep down that I'm probably not the one for her. That doesn't make the pain hurt any less. It makes it hurt more. I want to be everything for her so bad but I can't. When she was with Nick it hurt so badly sometimes. It was like all I was being chocked when I saw them kiss. I was being stabbed when I couldn't be the one to do that. Then Alo came in the picture. It hurts even more. They always know exactly what each one of them is talking about. They finish each other's sentences. They know each other more than anyone else could know them. I want that. If it's not supposed to be with her than who else? I'm not a patient person but my mates are all that I have. I wouldn't want to ruin anything I have with her right now, except she knows. The face that she knows makes everything that much harder. I try to watch what I say and I do. I don't want to give off the wrong impression. As long as she is happy I am happy for her.

"Fine." She said and laid down on her bed sliding underneath the covers. "Stay the night."

"Okay." I said making a bed on her floor.

"No, you silly, come lay up here with me." She said chuckling a little bit. I got up and laid besides her. I didn't want to get too close, knowing that it wouldn't help with getting over her. "Come closer." She whispered. I scooted closer. I could smell her hair. It always smelt like a mixture of strawberries and cinnamon. She grabbed my arm and wrapped it around her waist. This is what I don't get. She seemed to pushing me away and pulling me close at the same time. She was the most confusing person I have spent time with.

"You know you can trust me." She said quietly. She turned her body to face mine. Her hand found mine and she interlocked our fingers. "Don't be so worried that you're going to lose me, okay."

Was she trying to reassure me that even though I liked her we could still be friends? I really didn't know what she meant by this.

"Okay." Was all I said. She smiled and gave me kiss on my cheek.

"Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

Now I'm here sitting against the wall trying to make sense of everything. I just wish I could understand her more. I wish things didn't have to be so confusing.

You have to get over her. I tell myself. That's the only left to do. Get her out of my mind.

I did this before. I tried to get her out of my mind. I tried to push her away. That seemed to make her want to be closer to me. Everything is complicated.

I hear a noise to the right of me. I look over and see her. She is walking with Alo. They are holding hands and laughing. They're probably talking about some inside joke. She sees me and smiles. I stare back at her. I try to smile but nothing happens. I'm drawn back to the pain. The pain of knowing she'll never be mine.

I don't even know what this is about I was just bored.