Loki Laufeyson had a problem.

Well. Loki Laufeyson had several problems, most of them stemming from the fact that he was Laufeyson, not Odinson, but he had one particular problem: he needed a flatmate.

Loki shuddered to even think of his situation. Here he was, a god, stuck powerless on Midgard without the means to maintain a living space. And to be ... dependant on a human to help him out. A stranger. Because while Loki obviously knew several humans, none of them liked him. Apparently trying to liberate Earth from freedom didn't put you in anyone's good books.

Shame, really. He was only trying to help. Sort of.

Honestly, though, Loki knew he was lucky that SHIELD didn't track him down and stick him in a guillotine. They still had those, right? Guillotines? It was such a delightful method of murder, Loki couldn't imagine the humans rendering them obsolete.

Perhaps he would obtain one for himself. Yes, that would be a nice decoration for the main room of his shabby apartment. Except the he didn't have the means of procuring one ... which was his problem in the first place.

Loki needed a roommate. To help pay his rent. How terribly demeaning.

An ad was placed on the "list of Craig" via what the humans called the internet. For two and a half weeks, the ad sat there, lonely and unanswered, until an aspiring actor by the name of Tom volunteered himself.

Loki did not like the sound of Tom. But he had three days before rent was due and there were no other opotions.

And so it came to pass that Loki Laufeyson and Tom Hiddles became flatmates.

Loki had been sitting in the tiny Midgardian apartment for only half an hour before Mr. Hiddles opened the door with the key the landlord had given him. The sight of a great and (once) powerful Asgardian god must have been too much for his body, because Tom fell to the ground, his body shaking.

"... Mortal?" Loki asked, tentatively coming up to the fallen human. Tom wasn't in pain; he was laughing.

The human's bright blue eyes were watering, his grin spreading from ear to ear. And his laugh was ... well ...

"Ehehehehe! I wasn't expecting -" He had to gasp for air.

"I - I'm not quite sure I understand."

"I knew your name was Loki Laufeyson -" Tom paused for air again, "but I wasn't expecting - this!"

Loki simply stood for a moment, staring at the human before turning about with a swish of his long, green cape and plopping himself on the lawnchair in the center of the otherwise barren room with a sigh. "I do not possess any other clothing."

Tom was laying on his back, clutching his sides and gazing upside-down at the leather-and-metal-clad Asgardian.

"Well, we're going to have to change that," he said, propping himself up against the wall, "because," and he gasped for breath before breaking out, once more, into laughter, "you look ridiculous!"

Loki stood, befuddled. And a bit insulted. "This is the clothing of gods, you insolent toad."

Tom again fell to the ground. "Right - still need a new wardrobe. You're not ... you're not going to Comicon!"

Loki tilted his head slightly. "I - I do not understand. Comicon...?"

"Nothing," Tom waved it away with a swish of his hand. "So ... you're not - your accent, I mean - you're not from around here, are you?"

Loki simply shook his head.

"Neither am I!" Tom enthused before falling into an expectant silence. "Soooo," he continued when Loki did not say anything, "Where are you from?"

"I am - I am of Asgard," Loki admitted in a low voice.

Tom nodded in a "knowing" manner. "Yes. Asgard. Uhm ... remind me again, where is that? Norway?"

"I ..." Loki gave the human a condescending glance before conceding slowly. "Ye-es. In the northern reaches of the realm."

Nodding once again, Tom stood and walked to the lawnchair, extending a hand. "Well, Loki of Asgard, I am Tom of Britain. I suppose we'll be living together for a while. So. We really need some proper furniture."

He looked once again around the apartment. The living area, which connected directly to the hallway, was a small, simple, four-walled room. On the far side was a doorway with no door, which led to the kitchen, and two doors on one wall led to the single bedroom and dinky bathroom. It was clearly not built to house two people, but it would have to do.

Stuffing his hands into his pockets, Tom strolled over to the bedroom. "Bit of an undersized place. And let me guess ... judging by the lawnchair, I'm going to say you've been sleeping on a cot, haven't you?" He opened the door and peered into the room. "Yep. Nailed it. Well, it's lucky I have a sleeping bag, because that lawnchair doesn't look very inviting for the night."

Loki glanced at Tom then back to the floor. "You may sleep wherever you like. I don't care. I do not intend to spend any more time than necessary in these quarters. Please don't consider these arrangement to hold any amount of permanence."

Ooookay. I saw a post on tumblr and the cogs in my brain started turning and this happened. I don't know if I plan to continue with it or not, sooo ... tell me what you think? And maybe I'll write more?

Also disclaimer: Avengers, Loki, etc = not mine. No moneys