Fill for mass effect kink meme prompt:

"So, there are some fills about these two being the bestest warriors of their respective militaries and getting married for political reasons. Those fills mostly focus on their first time together though, and while there's nothing wrong with that, I'd like to see something a bit different.
I am curious how people who were recently nothing more than a couple of mortal enemies try to live together, how they deal with well, everything everyday life in such situation might throw them into."

...

Everyone in the car felt the tension. It hung above them like a big, dark raincloud and the asari driving was expecting lightning to strike any moment. Everything was her fault and she was paying the price now, begging the Goddess or any force in the galaxy, that the two in the backseat didn't know it. Liara shuddered. Maybe they did and would kill her the moment she stopped the car. Or maybe they would tie her up and torture her in the basement. She needed to stop thinking about it. "Protheans and artifacts," she counted in her head, trying to remember what made her happy, "big, deep pits full of treasures far, far away, where the two most dangerous soldiers in the galaxy wouldn't be able to find me."

Just a month ago, having a turian and human closer than 500 meters meant bloodshed. Then the asari and salarians stepped in, after ten long years of war, and made the peace terms to speed things up. Liara had been on the committee as her mother's substitute since she was unable to attend, though she had no idea what to say or why this was even allowed. One day she overheard two human women talking about an earth custom of marrying the heirs of two families in disagreement to bring them together. She had brought it up in one of the meetings and the committee thought it was a great idea, only instead of some politicians' children it would be the best soldiers of each species, showing their nations that it was possible to get along, despite war and differences. They even made her the head of the project. But when she had found the humans from before, they explained that they were discussing the plot of an old, stupid vid and it ended with the main characters burning down their mansion and killing each other. Liara had stood there mortified for a long time; it was already too late to change anything.

Her worst fears were confirmed when the news was told to Shepard and Vakarian. He had smashed every piece of furniture in the conference room with his bare hands, while Shepard simply put a few rounds from her pistol in the wall behind the asari delegate, millimeters from her head, and asked for the name of the one responsible for this.

Which brought Liara back to her current situation. Either no one really had said anything about her involvement or they were waiting for a chance to kill her in a slow, painful way without witnesses. Somehow there hadn't been a single incident with either of them since they were told; she hadn't seen them speak a word to each other, except for the marriage vows. She was pretty sure they hadn't even looked at each other since getting in the car. Not exactly happy newlyweds, but they should have a lot in common. She hoped that they would at least find a way to coexist. If not, the galaxy wouldsee hell.

When they arrived, she gave them quick tour around the house, never letting either out of sight and jumping at every noise. Furnishing the house had been a nightmare, both governments pouring money and sending big, expensive stuff, trying to outdo each other. Liara had to rent a storehouse for all the presents; Shepard and Vakarian could bring them here, if they felt like it. At the beginning she tried to make everyone happy, finding a place in the house for every gift, even managed to put a hot tub on the balcony, but soon gave up and did everything her way. She felt satisfied with her work, though the tub couldn't be moved again without half of the house.

"I'll come back in few days to see how you're doing. Hope you like the house," Liara said, preparing to leave.

"It's lovely, thank you," Shepard answered, giving her a small, tired smile.

When she was gone, Garrus picked up his bag and headed to the second floor. "You can take the bedroom," he said, halfway up. She didn't answer at all, but just took her own bag and followed.

Shepard didn't even look around, taking off her clothes and falling in the bed. It was soft and warm and smelled like freshly washed sheets. She felt so tired. The past month was a blur. One moment she was shouting at her superiors, that they have no rights to dictate who she marries, the next – she's standing in a white dress for a wedding photo. But the wedding was over, the war was over and her life as she knew it was over as well. Tomorrow she'll have to start everything from scratch, somehow not killing her husband or making a target of herself. Last thing she thought about was the conversation when she finally agreed to this. "Is your life alone more valuable than the thousands that will die if the war goes on?"

Shepard woke up next morning late. It was a strange feeling – to not have any plans for the day. Even when the war had ended, there were always meetings to attend or the wedding to prepare. She spent some time just lying in the huge bed, thinking about the mess she's gotten into this time. From all the crazy things she thought she might be forced to do, ending the war by marrying the enemy definitely wasn't on the list. And of all the turians, it had to be Vakarian. She had spent her whole career trying to bring him down. She always thought the highest point in her life will be putting bullet in his head after the fight of her life.

They were equally good on battlefield. All the missions she had failed, was because of him, and when she had managed to stop him, she celebrated it like her birthday. She respected, but hated him. How was she supposed to start loving and caring for him? She turned her head to look at the empty side of the bed, made for a turian to sleep. Shepard tried to imagine what it would be like to wake up and see his grey face with blue markings next to her. She'd probably slit his throat on instinct and he'd probably do the same. Good thing he went to sleep in the guest room.

Shepard left the second floor after a long, hot shower. She found her new husband in the kitchen, making food. He wasn't wearing a shirt, plates shining in the morning sun. She hadn't seen real turian without armor, only diagrams explaining where they were plated and their weak points. She didn't stare long, not sure how he would react to her curiosity.

"Good morning," she said, shifting her attention to an overly complicated coffee machine. He didn't even turn to look at her when he answered: "Good morning."

It took her five minutes to find a simple black coffee from the huge choice of drinks, sweeteners and syrups. There were even five different sorts of coffee beans. On ships, she was lucky if the instant coffee powder hadn't run out. When she finally got her drink, she turned to look at what the turian was doing next to her. He was cutting something blue and soft, but then she noticed he wasn't wearing any pants either.

"You're naked!" she said, shocked. She wasn't very shy or anything, but finding her mortal enemy naked in her kitchen, was not a good way to start a day, especially when the coffee machine had already used up her patience.

"Yeah, so?" he asked, finally turning to look at her. "It's not like turians have anything dangling aroundlike humans," he pointed at his plates.

"I can still see your ass," she said.

"I hope you like it," he answered, bending down to retrieve something from the lower shelf. She kicked his naked butt and heard his head hitting something metal, followed by swearing. Shepard quickly walked away. "Wear some pants at least," she shouted, leaving the kitchen.

...

Shepard spent the rest of the morning settling in and unpacking her stuff. She didn't own many things, but the job took more time because she was distracted by her thoughts of Vakarian. She actually felt bad about kicking him. He hadn't said anything to insult her. And she had forgotten that turians walk around naked in their homes – it's what she had read in one of the books on turian customs after getting to know about marriage. She didn't read it very carefully, more like skimmed over it as her personal little revenge for the deal. Now she felt like an idiot. She hoped she hadn't deleted them from her omnitool.

She finally left the bedroom a couple hours later. Somehow facing Vakarian to apologize required far more courage than fighting him one on one in an old storage room. She went down to the living room, but was distracted by the large amount of boxes next to the doors. She decided to take a closer look. They were wedding gifts. Most had Shepard & Vakarian written on them, but she noticed one big, red box with only her name on. She freed it and sat on the couch, putting it on the table before her. There was a message attached, that said: This should help you survive and have a little fun after the wedding. Love Alice and Mell

Shepard remembered these girls; they had served together on a ship for a year before Shepard got transferred. They quickly became friends and still called each other sometimes. She smiled to herself at the memories and wondered what they had sent, as she opened the box. Inside was nothing she expected. First thing she noticed was a big, pink vibrator lying in the middle of the box, surrounded by packages with pictures of naked men and women. She sat there for a moment stunned, till she heard footsteps behind her. She quickly put the lid back on and turned just in time to see Vakarian stopping next to her.

"What's in there?" he asked, pointing on the box. Good thing was – he didn't sound angry, the bad thing – his timing was the worst. But he was fully clothed this time.

"Nothing, just a joke. Some of my friends think they're very funny," she said, trying to act like she hadn't just opened a box full of sex toys.

"Oh, can I see?" he asked, reaching for the lid.

"No!" she panicked and tried to snatch the box away, but since the universe seemed to hate her lately, she spilled the contents on table and floor instead. There was a lot more stuff in there than she thought.

They both stood there awkwardly, not sure whether to run away or pick them up.

"I should probably go… do something," he said nervously, trying to look anywhere but on the toys or her. They weren't married even a full day, and it already was turning into a disaster. Now he'll probably think she's some kind of sexual deviant or nympho. Since she probably couldn't embarrass herself any further…

"Commander Vakarian," she said in much quieter voice than usually. Thankfully he stopped and turned to look at her.

"Please, just call me Garrus," he said.

She let out a heavy sigh. "Garrus, I wanted to apologize for this morning. I shouldn't have kicked you."

"It was my fault as well," he answered, "I didn't really read the materials they sent me about humans and acted like I was living alone."

"I didn't read them either," she admitted, then asked: "So, no hard feelings?"

"Yeah," he nodded, but didn't turn to leave, instead stepped closer a moment later. "I was thinking, Shepard - neither of us are in this out of free will, but that doesn't mean we have to be enemies. The war is over and we're both stuck here, so we might try to get along at least on some level, treat each other with respect."

Shepard smiled. It sounded so like the commander she knew – he always liked to plan ahead, prepare for everything. It was his strong point, just like hers was improvising. It was why defeating him felt so good – she beat him where he was the best. But Garrus was right – the war was over, there was no point in fighting, especially in this situation. And some certainty would be welcome.

"I've always respected you," she admitted.

"Respecting me as an enemy and as someone you share your home with are two different things," he pointed out. Shepard had to agree, but she wasn't sure she knew how to do it. She grew up on ships and had spent most of her life there. She hadn't really lived in a house for time period long enough to call it a home. Then again she hadn't been married before or tried to be friendly with a turian. It was new life indeed.

"Alright, I'll try to respect you as someone I live with," she said, extending her hand. He hesitated for a second, then shook it in a human way, looking her in the eyes: "As will I."

Somehow this little moment meant more to her than the whole previous day with paper signing and vows.