A/N: so, I've not written these characters before, but this is going to be a- hopefully humorous- attempt at a sort of 5 and 1 deal with the Avengers heading out for their all-important shawarma. Five times the Avengers go for shawarma and one time it comes to them.

…*…

The first time they go for shawarma is after Thor returns to the planet once again.

Well, the first time since their initial gathering, the, 'hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but save the planet, then shawarma maybe?' meal they had had following the Loki incident. That had been a silent affair, although completely companionable. All present were familiar with earth-saving adrenalin rushes and the huge pangs of hunger which followed. New York was put back together behind them as they chewed thoughtfully and shared their first insights into Thor's huge Asgardian appetite.

And now Thor and his bottomless stomach are back in town, only a few weeks later, so Tony thinks that it must be time for shawarma again. The timing of his invite is far better than his previous, and de facto Avengers leader Steve agrees that they could all do with a bit of team bonding, never knowing when they may next be called to act together.

'Déjà vu,' Tony quips as he takes the same seat as he had previously done. The table was free, so why not? 'Thor, big guy, you even brought your cape and everything. How's Mjolnir doing?'

'Mightily,' comes Thor's booming reply. He scowls down at the laminated menu in his hands. 'This is not a form of Midgardian dialect I have come across before.'

'It's Arabic,' Bruce explains.

'Don't worry about it, Shakes, we'll just order you one of everything, then you can eat it all and I can foot the bill. Boy, do I enjoy dinner and a show,' Tony tells the demi-god.

It is Tony who does most of the talking once they have placed their orders. Steve still isn't entirely sure just exactly what he has ordered but he reasons that it has to be better than most of what was sent down to the front lines. He hadn't eaten anything the last time they had visited the establishment, his super-soldier metabolism churning along happily without needing a refuel.

The Captain, from his position at the head of the table, looks down the length of it as Tony blathers on, taking up most of the oxygen and replacing it with hot air. Thor listens raptly, eager to see what Midgardian adventures he has been missing out on. Bruce pushes a foot against the leg of the table, easing his chair into a leaning position as he wipes his glasses against the bottom edge of his shirt. Natasha is eyeing Tony wryly as he speaks. Without looking away from the billionaire playboy philanthropist she reaches out and takes a butter knife from between Clint's fingers. He had been dragging it against the wood, bored, and not really paying Tony all that much attention. He reaches out and starts fiddling with a salt shaker instead.

Natasha set the knife back down as Tony was saying,

'Honestly though, this guy,' he claps a hand heartily against Bruce's shoulder, who stumbles forward as his four chair legs reach the ground again. Bruce's hands slam against the table as he catches his balance. If the table had not been surrounded by a super-solider, a demi-god and two assassins, there may have been an intake of breath as they waited to see whether the sudden shock launched the Hulk out of hiding.

'Whoops, sorry, Brucie,' Tony says, then continues, 'don't know what I did without him. My R&D people, some of the best in the world, are like snotty children- no, ants- no, plankton, - compared to Dr Banner here. I have gotten so much done since he joined up with me. I may even start paying him.'

'Aw, did little Tony find a friend?' Natasha mocks.

'Sounds like more than that,' Clint mutters. Natasha laughs at that, and Steve smiles.

'Birdbrain, scientists might not believe in soul mates but we definitely know a lot about chemistry,' Tony drawls. He gestures between himself and Bruce. 'And we… have chemistry.'

'If you say so, Tony,' Bruce says, as if this one phrase is a necessity within his daily life. It is.

'Only, you mustn't tell Pepper.'

'I get the feeling she knows.'

Tony gasps and holds a hand to his chest in a swoon. His arc reactor glows through his fingers. 'Sweetie, you told her about us?'

'She has spent almost as much time in the lab as we have. She knows. Apparently she's willing to share.'

Their shawarma dishes arrive and Tony's mouth is just full enough that he is unable to talk.

'Thor, what brings you back to earth- uh, I mean, Midguard?' Steve asks.

'My lady, Jane Foster,' Thor spews through a mouthful of mixed meats. 'I wish to return and speak with her.'

'Yeah, well, make sure you do it without food in your mouth, Hammer Time, the ladyfolk down here aren't so hot on that. Yeuch,' Tony comments. He picks a lump of beef from out of his hair and flicks it at Steve, who catches it, realises it has been in Thor's mouth, and instantly drops it once again.

'It's nice that you have someone here,' Steve says, wiping his hand along his jeans. Demi-god or not, he doesn't really want another man's saliva all over his palm while he's trying to eat.

'And you, of course, my Avenger friends!' Thor beams. 'Many happy times can be spent amongst you upon Midguard.'

'The Chitauri invasion was such a happy time,' Bruce says to this.

'Time of my life,' Natasha adds drily.

'Memories,' Tony sighs, as if he is a pre-pubescent girl reflecting upon the moment that dreamy guy in class looked over at her (or rather, out of the window past her). 'Who's going to bring the camera next time, huh, guys? Gotta get some snaps for our Avengers Christmas card.'

'I usually have a good vantage point, but my hands tend to be otherwise occupied,' Clint answers, 'it'd be pretty hard.'

'That's what she said.'

Clint rolls his eyes. Thor wonders who this mythical she is; the one who is omnipresent and often speaking, but never so that he notices.

Steve steers the conversation back on track.

'Fun or no, I think we did well. As a team. After Tony had managed to shove himself and his ego into his Iron Man suit, of course.'

'Wahey, GI Joe, does have a sense of humour. Knew you had it in you somewhere, Cap, underneath all that moral fibre.'

'I don't think you realise how hard it is to tell a joke when you're suddenly in another century, Stark.'

'Sure I do. I was halfway through a classic knock-knock joke as the ball dropped at the end of '99.'

'Not surprising, consider the amount you talk, Stark,' Natasha comes in to defend Steve's vintage honour.

'Children, children,' Bruce calms.

They chew in silence for a few minutes.

'If you don't mind me asking, Thor,' Steve starts, 'what happened to Loki when you got back to Asgard?'

Thor looks oddly solemn.

'I cannot possibly say.'

Clint, who had looked up sharply at the mention of Loki's name, suggested, 'An arrow to the knee? Eyes? Balls?'

'I cannot possibly say.'

'Do you have the death sentence on Asgard?' Tony asks bluntly.

'Death brings only the rewards of Valhalla to the departed,' Thor answers, not sensing any disrespect in Tony's impertinence. 'And a demi-god such as my brother- adopted brother- would not be so easy to destroy.'

'Not even the Other Guy managed that,' Bruce says.

'So what kind of punishment befits a minor god who has attempted genocide?' Tony ponders.

'Taking his magic away?' Bruce suggests.

'I cannot possibly say.'

'Isolation and imprisonment?' Steve adds.

'I cannot possibly say.'

'Knives pinning him down for a couple of hundred years?' It is Natasha this time.

'I cannot possibly say.'

'Having to muck out the eight-legged horse for the next century?' Tony muses.

'I- I cannot-,' Thor fumbles.

'What?'

'That's it?' Clint exclaims viciously, slamming his glass down. 'That's it?'

'It is a sufficient punishment,' Thor says sombrely. 'And only the beginning of many.'

'You never know, Barton, it may be worse than it sounds,' Tony says. 'It's got eight legs, maybe its got a few extra as-,'

'It is a sufficient punishment,' Thor repeats.

'I have a few other ideas…'

And so, their first official Avengers shawarma outing is spent coming up with more creative ways to punish Loki for all of his crimes. Despite some of Clint and Natasha's darker suggestions, Tony's apparent inability to take any of it seriously and Thor's constant repetition of himself, Steve thinks that it's nice that they at least have something to bond over.