Ok, so here we go with a new story! I'm really excited with this one! First we need to clear some technicalities!

1. Remus is 36, Tonks is 35

2. This is totally AU, no war, no Moldyshorts, just plain ol' drama!

3. That means...EVERYONE IS ALIVE! Lily, James, Sirius, all of them! I know exciting!

4. There will be Teddy, eventually, but I'm doing this my way!

and finally,

5. I do not own Harry Potter, I honestly don't, I wish I did. I would have done things way differently!

Now, Enjoy!

"Let's play friends with benefits & see who catches feelings first."

~Unknown

Tonks P.O.V.

This relationship between Remus and I has been going on for quite some time. He comes over, we eat or talk or whatever mindless friend things, then, well, we fuck. It's just the way we've worked. He didn't want a relationship, mainly because of his "problem", and I didn't want any other guy. So I pretended I was in it for the sex, and we kept a strong friendship for the last twenty years. It worked, sort of. I suppose I knew when we started that I was screwing myself over, but I wanted it so bad.

December 31, 1976

New Year's Eve

James Potter's House

"Hey Prongs, pour us another, that's it" Sirius slurred as he fell on the couch next to Lily. Lily sent James a death glare, clearly stating that if he gave Sirius one more drink, she'd kill him. Of course we all knew she wouldn't, she'd been threatening him since they were eleven, and they still remained the best of friends. James smiled bashfully and shrugged his shoulders, pouring Sirius another glass of firewhiskey. Lily huffed and sipped lightly on her drink.

" So, Dora," I looked up at Remus who was now perched on the arm of the chair I was occupying, "You're related to Sirius, tell me, do you feel the need to get unnecessarily drunk and do- what is he doing?" I looked up to see Sirius dry humping the air and spinning his shirt above his head. Only my idiot cousin could have this much fun by himself. Lily finished her drink and aimed her glass at Sirius's head, just missing. She let out an irritated sigh and turned bidding us all goodnight. James stared after her, a slight smile on his face. That fool had it so damn bad. Even if he didn't know it yet. I turned to look at Remus,

"To answer your question, no, I do not feel the urge to do that." I tilted my head towards Sirius who was now slow dancing with James's broom. Remus laughed.

"Well I'm going to bed," I stood placing my empty glass on the table. Remus stood up as well

"I suppose I'll go too. Avoid that." He laughed, picking up a nearly empty bottle of firewhiskey and finishing it off. We walked in silence towards our room, I could feel my heart racing. Only Lily knew, but I really liked Remus, and this "alone time" was making me sort of nervous. We finally reached my room, I opened the door and turned to tell Remus goodnight. However, he cut me off,

"You know, it's bad luck to ring in the New Year alone."

"Really?"

"Yea, or well, at least that's what my mum always says." I giggled. Dammit Tonks, control yourself! "And it's only about ten minutes away, we could sit and talk till then. I'm just not tired yet!" He laughed. I nodded leading him into my room. He plopped down on my bed, patting the spot next to him. I sat, monitoring my breathing.

"It's so weird," He said suddenly

"What?"

"I only have one more year of school. It's strange."

"Technically you have one and a half more years of school." He shoved me lightly.

"You know what I mean!" I laughed.

"Yea, but that means you can start making a difference in the world." He snorted.

"Me? Hello, werewolf! Might as well stamp a big red X on my forehead." I frowned.

"Don't say that." He didn't respond, but I knew he was probably rolling his eyes. We sat in silence after that. I could hear him breathing lightly, compared to my breathing. I wonder if he can hear me. I take deep breaths trying to stay calm.

"Dora," I looked up, Remus's face was incredibly close,

"Hmm," I managed to squeak out,

"Happy New Year's." He whispered before pressing his lips to mine. I felt my eyes widen. This was not happening, I only dreamed of this happening! I felt him pull away, and something in me snapped. My hands shot up and wrapped around his neck pulling him back in. When his lips meet mine again, I'm ready. We move in tandem, I feel his tongue run across my bottom lip; I open my mouth to give him access. This was amazing. I'd only kissed one other boy in my life, and that barely counted as it was for a maximum of two seconds. I shivered as I felt a cool hand touch my stomach, the butterflies in my stomach going rampant. His hand slipped upward stopping below my bra. I pulled back, gently kissing him on the lips. I looked in his eyes and made split decision. In a swift movement I pulled my shirt over my head, I saw his eyes widened before he leaned in to kiss me again, unbuckling my bra at the same time. I reached for his shirt, thankful that he tended to wear button ups and began to undo them. He shrugged his arms out of the sleeves, and pulled back to take off his undershirt. I stared at his chest in wonder. Remus was not as skinny as most people thought he was, and he was definitely part wolf, the hair on his chest could vouch for him. Yet, I found it extremely attractive and manly. I leaned forward pulling him back to me. I felt his hands reach for my zipper, shuddering as his hand slipped into my jeans. It was then I knew there was no turning back.

I awoke the next morning to arms wrapped firmly around my waist. I lifted the covers to make sure last night wasn't a dream. Nope, stark naked. I couldn't believe that had happened. It was, amazing, painful, but amazing. I felt Remus shift, his grip on me slackened. I rolled over to meet his sleepy eyes.

"Good morning."

"Did we?" I lifted the covers in response, "Shit, I'm so sorry Dora."

"Don't be, I wanted it, too." He opened his mouth to say something, but closed it. Finally he sat up and slid out of the bed. I watched him put his clothes back on and turn to leave.

"Hey Remus," He turned around. I stood up, not caring that I was totally nude and pressed my lips against his, "Thanks." He smiled and nodded, then left me alone. I sighed and fell on my bed. God, I hope this doesn't make us awkward. Stupid, stupid Tonks! I grabbed my nightshirt and throwing it on, before heading to the shower. When I finally came downstairs I found my friends all sitting around the table eating breakfast.

"There you are slowpoke! Come get a pancake before Sirius and Remus eat them all!" Lily yelled. I sat down in the only available seat between Remus and Sirius, taking two pancakes for myself.

"You want any bacon?" Remus asked me, smiling. I nodded, laughing as he pouted. Ok, so no awkwardness, good, good, this is good.

Present Day

And that is how I ended up here, twenty years later, lying naked next to my best friend as he hogs the entire bed. I won't say I regret it, I don't. It was and is the best thing that happened to me, but it hurts. It really fucking hurts. And he'll be waking up soon and he'll be leaving soon, and he'll be back soon. It's a cycle, one that I don't want to break, but I'm going to have to. It's not healthy for me, and it's certainly not healthy for a kid.

SO that's numero uno! Well, what is in store for our dear Nymphadora? Hmmm? Let's find out shall we? See you next chapter!

-Demi