Chapter 1: Always Check your Rituals

If one thing could be said about the Fourth, is that he always had backup plans. If one thing could be said about the Shinigami, is that it always kept its deal. And if one thing could be said about Uzumaki Naruto, is that anything that dealt with him as the centerpiece was unpredictable. Akatsuki learned that first hand.

The Fourth always had a back up plan, as was the case when he made the seal for Naruto, it was to filter and expand Naruto's own chakra with that which was caged in with the Shinigami's help. And while Naruto could let the Nine-Tailed Fox free, it was in the contract that was made. Only the key or Naruto himself could let the Kyuubi go, and nothing short of the Death of the host could let him leave otherwise.

The contract itself was simple as far as the seal was prescribed. Naruto would contain the power of the Kyuubi. If the Kyuubi got free, the Shinigami would let the Fourth Hokage leave his stomach, as well as the Kyuubi's power itself. That was simply it, except for drastic complications that came from the letter of the contract and one Naruto and the Akatsuki extraction ritual.

The problem lay in how the ritual was done. It extracted the 'soul' of the fox before the chakra. Naruto, being an Uzumaki, had massive reserves naturally which was engorged by Kyuubi's chakra influx. He had so much chakra due to the seal that he was equal to the Ichibi in terms of chakra amount. That and the healing factor of the Uzumaki's and the nature of how the seal exactly worked meant that they had to fight off Naruto's natural chakra to get to the Kyuubi's.

The same Kyuubi's chakra that was split in half and had regrown or regenerated itself. It took twelve years plus for it to happen, but it did. The thing was, the Kyuubi's other half had done the same thing in the Shinigami's stomach as a bored Minato watched on as he fought the insentient chakra construct in yet another battle, this one a staring contest. Being dead for sixteen years got old fast. With no one to talk to for the first twelve other than himself, he learned to make due. And by watching it, Minato had come up with a theory on what exactly the tails meant.

Each tail wasn't, as some thought an additional level of power. No, it was much more than that, as he watched on. Yes, they were another level of power, but it was exponential. Each additional tail meant an exponential gain by a factor of two. The second tail was as strong as two of the first. So nine tails of power wasn't simply nine times as strong as the first but an agonizingly large five hundred and eleven times stronger. That being the case, then the legendary Juubi was over twice as strong as the Kyuubi, and over one thousand times as strong as the Ichibi in pure chakra capacity.

And that was where the ritual blew up in their faces, as the Kyuubi was free of Naruto by an unnatural means, which broke the contract of the Shinigami. Which in turn free Minato (who was winning his poker game, though Orochimaru's hands were doing well for themselves) and let the Kyuubi's chakra free from the stomach of the Shinigami. Now, this might not have been a problem with things if they had happened naturally, but Naruto was still the container for the Kyuubi's chakra until he died. And as he was still alive, this in turn meant he was containing the Kyuubi's chakra.

The chakra that had now just doubled, and since the primary seal was to cage the Kyuubi, its chakra had no intent or will. And the Kyuubi was now trapped in a statue that was in reality yet another 'dimension' away. So, since there was no soul for it to trap, and the seal wasn't made for holding that much chakra, it instantly flushed and converted the excess chakra.

Right into the system of the young boy, whose body now housed his own power on par with the Ichibi, but two Kyuubi's. And his seal and body had made that chakra his own. His coils had burst, his chakra network had been torn to shreds and back by the force of a sun. Everything, in fact, should have meant he died, but the seal still held and did its job, along with the natural predilection of the chakra to regenerate wounds. If Naruto hadn't been an Uzumaki, he would have died. If he hadn't had the seal, he would have died. If Naruto hadn't have had the power of the Ichibi as a baseline, he might have just died. Sure, the amount of chakra now entering his system dwarfed his own. By orders of magnitude, the chakra was one thousand twenty-two times as much as his own. But that was a grand total of one thousand twenty-three of those first tails of power.

Or, in other words, Tobi had his wish to reform the Juubi. Alas, the rest of that didn't go to his plans, as the new 'Juubi' was now one Naruto, one Uzumaki Naruto. A being so astronomically strong that the mere fact that there was that much chakra concentrated on one being was absurd. Of course, Tobi was blindsided as he had half a living second to realize that before the power erupted from Naruto's body and wiped out everything and everyone in the sealing room except for the statue. The count of which was Tobi, Kakuza, and Nagato, as Yahiko's body and Konan were in Ame. And disrupted the sealing ritual.

An earth-shaking roar literally tore the place apart, as the image of a giant beast was reflected off the moon. Before Naruto slipped into a deep coma. And Konan came along and used whatever knowledge she had in sealing along with a contingent of Ame shinobi. And so writings of a demon was passed down that was so powerful it was sealed while asleep and an altar was placed over it to keep it from awaking as it was impossible to defeat.

Of course the sealing ritual backfired as the statue opened a rift and actually connected a new dimension. The process would be slow and gradual over thousands of years, but a plane to a realm of beings that were closely related to humans and of course, were called demons. So it was no wonder, millenia later that someone would want to have access to a demon so powerful it was locked away.

The night hadn't been going so well for Negi. After talking to Konoka's father, he had learned about his father's house here in Japan. That was about the only good thing to have happened, as Konoka was kidnapped right out from under them and people were petrified except for Asuna, who was stripped. Then they had gotten into a running battle with Konoka's kidnappers and then Konoka was used in a ritual to summon a demon. A demon Negi couldn't have beaten.

A resounding groan of the earth itself had caught their attention, and even the demon looked around baffled before a giant slab of rock erupted out from underneath him and hit him in the groin hard enough to clench his legs in pain. Setsuna twisted in the air to avoid the rebounding rock

"What the hell was that," The demon bellowed in a humorously high-pitched voice before noticing the latent energy of the area had somehow sky-rocketed.

One giant energy attack that was luckily for the surrounding land (i.e. Kyoto) pointed upwards and slammed into the demon. Unluckily for the demon it was hitting it and vaporized whatever barrier it had before continuing on and doing the same to its upper body.

A bestial roar shook the area before the fog cleared, leaving a blond-haired man whose dignity was protected by only the fact he collapsed forward onto the ground, rather than on his side or back.

"What the hell was that," was the echoed response of Asuna. By the looks on everyone's face, including Fate and Evangeline, that was the shared thought.

"It looks like I am at a disadvantage," Fate said as he disappeared.

"Running away, hmm," Evangeline muttered before laughing, "Haha, even he knows the power of the Undying Mage."

"Evangeline-san," Negi got out as he collapsed due to his petrified side.

"Aniki's a mess, his entire right side has turned to stone," one terrified Chamo yelled.

"Negi-sensei's high magic resistance has slowed the petrification process down. But soon the petrification shall reach his neck and be unable to breathe, leading to death," Chachamaru stated.

"Eva-chan, can't you do something to heal him," Asuna panicked as she head Chachamaru's statement.

"I. . . I'm no got at healing magic." Eva responded slightly despondent. A unsettling silence took over the group as they went deep in thought.

"I'll do it, I'll kiss Negi. I'll make a pactio with him," Konoka broke out, "It's the least I can do." The group looked at eachother and nodded as Chamo set up the circle.

"Pactio," he yelled as they kissed and the area was awash in magical light. And the group looked on in worry as the waited for Negi to awaken.

"Nnn. . . Konoka-san," Negi groaned out, "Thank goodness your okay." The group celebrated as Negi was alright, and would have continued except for another large groan.

"So, what are we going to do with him," Asuna said as she pointed to the naked male.

"Let Eishun take care of the new brat," Evangeline laughed.

"So glad you volunteered to carry him Eva-chan," Asuna replied in a sickly sweet voice. 'Ha, that'll teach the showoff,' Asuna thought. Before grabbing Negi and walking towards the Konoka's father's complex. Everyone but Chachamaru and Evangeline glanced at the body, Evangeline and Asuna before following, though quite a few of the girls got a little red.

"H-hey, you can't order me to take the body. Get back here," Evangeline yelled before turning to Chachamaru, "Chachamaru, you take him back." Chachamaru nodded before grabbing picking up the blond bridal style. Evangeline flushed red, "And cover him." Chachamaru looked confused, before looking down at her burden.

"Ahh, I believe I am overheating slightly, Master," Chachamaru said in her monotone, her cheeks slightly pink. 'All systems indicate nominal baseline readings except for heat and increased energy consumption that only my battle settings run at. I will need to check in with Hakase,' Chachamaru concluded. "Master, the Energy Signature readings from that attack correspond to the male I am carrying. I cannot with one hundred percent certainty tell you if that is due to the latent energy that the attack left being higher because he was near the launch or a number of other reasons other than him being the origin."

"Bwahaha, seems like this little trip just got more interesting, wouldn't you say, Chachamaru," Evangeline laughed, regaining her good, or in her opinion, evil cheer.

"I do not know Master, but I will take your word for it," Chachamaru replied before taking off her apron to use as a makeshift cover over the male's groin.

"Let's go," Evangeline sighed.

The blond haired man found himself in a bed, and to his relief, not in a hospital. He hated blacking out and waking up in a hospital. 'Of course, this might be the one time I might have preferred to, getting a Bijuu ripped out of you isn't healthy, even for me.' It was an old home, reminding him of Toki's palace, and Hinata's clan complex. And a few other odd homes he saw.

He heard voices coming from the hall, as his thoughts wandered. Concentrating a little harder, he tried to focus in on exactly they were saying. "*(#& ) #(&%$ ( )(*$*&, ›!" He blinked, and tried again, "(#)# -*&^%$-sama was (*# )$ &&^%," a masculine sounding voice said.

"* glad * !* ^$# ($# saved her," a feminine voice replied. He wondered why he was picking up words slowly. Why couldn't he understand them, as he was sure everyone in the elemental nations spoke the same language. And he was sure they weren't speaking it.

"Yes, but the $&%# they ($%# * up is odd, a #$%# ," a new deep voice spoke in what he was sure was an inquisitive tone. "A Yankee?"

"No, his hair down there was the same color with blue eyes, probably has *%&^# blood," The first feminine voice replied.

"Or Demon blood," the first man replied.

"Possibly, as his 'whiskers' are either scars or birth marks, as they are not tattoos," the girl agreed.

"So many monsters here," the second man spoke, before he choked out, "Not that I mean anything bad about them, as Setsuna-san is alright, just odd to have so many no-pure humans around here. Well, other than the charms."

"Yeah, it has been years since either Konoka-oujo-sama or Setsuna-san was here. Add to that the half-blooded dog boy and the Dark Evangel herself along with two combat dolls? I don't think anyone was expecting her here," the first voice said hastily.

"Hitomi-chan, Hitomi-chan, how is he," a light airy female voice called out.

"The stranger that Konoka-oujo-sama saw is fine, Reiko. I expect he will need food and drink soon after he wakes up," the first female voice named Hitomi said.

"Hitomi-chan, you know I meant how big he is. . . I know he wasn't dressed when he arrived," The new girl known as Reiko replied with what he imagined was a pout.

"Patient confidentiality Reiko, but I will state he is more of a 'Monster' than Honda here asleep. Well, I need to check up on him, you can follow me in if you want Reiko" Hitomi stated, leaving a most likely flustered Honda in her wake as she turned.

'More of a Monster. . .' His thoughts trailed off before his face took on a shade of red more familiar with apples than people as the door slid open.

Footsteps came to a halt as a woman in a loose blue kimono followed by someone in a suit jacket with a short skirt opened the spied the blond haired occupant of the room. The kimono wearing woman had long black hair tied into a hasty bun that spilled out some locks. She had deep brown eyes the color of mahogany wood, with a button nose, and from what could be told that wasn't hid by the kimono, a slim figure. The suit girl had chestnut brown hair cut short, with mirthful forest green eyes over a playful smile. She had a notable bust hugged tight to her trimmed suit, with a sword on her hips and long legs.

"Reiko! Get Eishun-sama," Hitomi ordered as she heard mumblings that couldn't possibly be the same language. "Sir, if you can understand me, how much did you hear?" The blond turned to nod before his face took a deeper crimson hue.

'Oh dear, he heard didn't he? If Reiko hears about this,' Hitomi thought before shuddering internally. "Sir, you just have to nod yes or no to any questions before Eishun-Sama arrives." Hitomi smiled as he nodded, "Alright, did you hear me talk to Reiko, the woman who came in after me?" His nod brought a blush to her face. "Please forget about that!" Hitomi nearly yelled in panic. A questioning look was brought to his face.

"You won't because you don't understand why," Hitomi eked out. A nod of confirmation. Her blush got even more intense. "Do you need me to explain it?" Another nod. 'I hope he isn't making fun of me. Oh, how do I even explain it.' "Is it because I called it a 'Monster'?" A slow shake of his head brought her blush to incandescent levels.

"I mean, when I had to bandage you up, I saw your body. I've seen other bodies as well, and. . . you are bigger flaccid then most men erect," Hitomi slowly got out, happy with herself for not stuttering. And then she saw the confused look on the man's face. 'I had to get a virgin, didn't I? Did I insult some god or something for this to happen?' "Your p-p-penis is huge!"

"His what is huge Hitomi," the door slid open to reveal a rather amused man. With a rather severe face, the grin was slightly unsettling to see on him. "Reiko is getting some water now, but should I have sent for a three glasses?"

"Eishun-sama," Hitomi squeaked, slightly scandalized by the whole thing, "Why would we need three?" 'Oh dear, I forgot to tell her to get some before sending her out for Eishun-Sama.'

"Well, you might need two, one to cool you off, and the other to allow you to talk," Eishun replied, "Ah, here is Reiko now."

"See Hitomi-chan, with you acting like this, even the normally kind Eishun-sama can't help but tease you," Reiko cheerfully replied before setting the water by the blond-haired man, before turning her direction to him, "Now drink the water up so we can have a nice conversation, 'kay?" The blue-eyes looked at her as he nodded. He slowly grabbed the glass, his hand slightly shaking before he willed it still and brought it to his lips. The cool liquid quenched his parched tongue, allowing some lubrication to return.

"Can you speak," Eishun deliberately said slowly, carefully enunciating each syllable.

"Yes," came his reply with a slight creak, as though using his voice recently was a rare occurance.

"As you probably know now, my name is Konoe Eishun, and this is Mikado Hitomi and Mitsuhide Reiko. If you can recall yours, please tell us," Konoe spoke, his hands making gestures to Hitomi and Reiko.

"U zu ma ki . . . Uzumaki Naruto," came Naruto's response, his tongue tasting over every syllable.

"Uzumaki-san, your name is Fishcake," Eishun's questioned, eyebrow slightly raised.

"Maelstrom, why does everyone go to Fishcake, I might like Ramen, but I'm not named after it," Naruto pouted slightly, causing Reiko to giggle, "And no Uzumaki, call me Naruto."

"Be that as it may, Naruto-san, but can you tell us what you were doing at the shrine," Eishun glanced at the women before waiting on Naruto's reply.

"Where what now," Naruto elegantly responded.

"There was a shrine there, with a ritual going on," Eishun prompted.

"Ehh, sure there was, but it wasn't a shrine last I remember. And the ritual failed, otherwise I wouldn't be alive," Naruto pondered, "Meh, they deserve it, bastards." 'What does he mean there wasn't a shrine there? The altars been there for a longer time then anyone really remembers. Maybe it is one of those religion things?' was the summation thought between the three of them as they shared a glance. "And I was there because I was taken there. Oi! Before I forget, what language are we speaking?" That single question brought a look of shock and confusion on their faces.

"You don't know what language you are speaking," Eishun decided to ask, putting his next question he had about the events that took place yesterday night aside.

"No? I mean I just picked it up from when your people outside where yapping. This isn't my language, so I have no idea how I even got here. Everyone spoke a different language from where I was from," Naruto replied.

"This is Japanese, and where did you come from, if I may ask," Eishun ventured.

"The Elemental Countries. Hi no Kuni. Konohagakure. Though I was in Ame near Amegakure last I knew," Naruto shrugged, "So where am I now?"

"Kyoto on the island of Honshu in Japan. You are currently at the Konoe compound," Eishun replied, "Though I've never heard of the Elemental Countries. Though from the sounds of it, you've never heard of Japan either."

"Nope, never heard of the place. We didn't even know there was really a place outside the Elemental Countries," Naruto nodded, "Or at least I don't think we did. Meh, never was one to pay attention to that sort of thing anyway."

"Well, rest up and we'll talk later. Later tonight, as today I'm showing my daughter and her friends to a special house," Eishun lightly replied, ignoring the giggling from Reiko.

"Oi, can I walk around, I was never one to sit in bed all day," Naruto grinned, his voice cheery.

"Yes, just don't leave the walls of the compound, and if you need help getting back, just tell any member here that you are Hitomi's patient," Eishun replied back, before exiting what he thought was Naruto's hearing with Reiko, "As for you Reiko, I need you to check on any information about the area that the ritual was held, and see if you can find anything that might be from these 'Elemental Countries'.'

"Hai, Eishun-sama, do you mind if I draft some help from the librarians," Reiko pleaded. Eishun's silent reply was a simple nod. "Yes, time to torture. . . I mean get some librarians to help. Bwahahaha."

"Reiko, I need a report of any new information you gather by the end of the day today," Eishun commanded before waving her off as he went about his own business. Reiko grinned mischievously as she ran and grabbed Hitomi and dragged her off.

"Hitomi, I never knew you would talk to a man about his size in a non-medical manner," Reiko's teasing voice drifted down to Naruto before the conversation was lost on his ears.

Naruto blinked as he steadied himself to get out of bed. He frowned slightly, as he felt weak. Not physically, though if you pressed Naruto, he might say he feels odd. Like his body is a bit taller than it remembered being, though that feeling quickly passed. Studying his body, he noticed that sadly there was no orange on his person, just a plain gray robe. Which was a tragedy as far as he was concerned, but he'd rather be clothed than naked, and it was given to him freely. Those were things to change at a later date, anyway.

And as Naruto started to walk, his gait felt off as well, as if his muscles were unused to movement, though considering how long he might have been out of it, that was no surprise. His strides became firmer, but he still felt something was off. And it had to do with his chakra reserves. They didn't feel full. Which boggled his mind, as he was always full of chakra. And this lead him to check his chakra levels, and he felt like he should be overburdened with as much chakra as he had on his old coils.

Heck, in comparison to earlier, his chakra was mind-numbingly large. It was like comparing his usual chakra before this had happened to Sakura's as a fresh genin. It dwarfed his own by an order of magnitude. He wondered if that was what the Kyuubi's chakra felt like. And yet, he didn't even feel halfway full. If his chakra was monstrous before, this new chakra amount was simply reality warping. He felt like the Kyuubi might, like he couldn't possibly use it all at once so easily.

"You know, this might be why fuzzbutt was so arrogant," Naruto casually thought out loud. He looked around sheepishly as two people passed him. Both in Kimono's with a sword at their side. They nodded and continued on course.

Naruto felt like he was walking in that hallway for an hour before he finally found the door to the outside. He smiled as he felt the fresh air and could see the compound better. He turned around and confirmed his earlier thought was off. The compound wasn't like the Hyuuga's, it was what the Hyuuga's aspired their compound to be. It was a massive sprawl inclosed by the wall. It just seemed so natural for Naruto to walk around it, that he decided to follow it in one direction.

He was rather taken in by the pines, that he almost didn't hear the voice at first. The girls voice was trying to sound stoic, "I. . .It's the law of my people. . . once you've seen my true form. . . I have no choice but to. . ." but to him, honestly, the girl sounded in distress. And one thing Naruto couldn't stand was someone in distress.

"I've fulfilled my vow to protect Ojuo-sama, and I've repaid. . ." she yelled as she ran before slamming into one blond-haired stranger from the night before.

"Oi, Oi, whats the matter with you? You look like you are about to run away," Naruto said, causing Negi and company to bite their tongues. After all, they didn't know if he was aware or not. And Negi did not want to become an ermine.

"So-sorry, but I must get going, a monster like me can't. . . no, won't be able to serve Ojou-sama," The girl with the black-hair and pony-tail yelled out, trying to run again before a hand grasped her wrist.

"Don't call yourself a monster! I've seen monsters before, and you aren't one of them. You obviously care about someone so much to runaway to stop hurting her. And no monster would do that. I don't care if people call you a monster or a demon, because you are not one. Running away will just make things worse, and if your Ojou-sama that you respect so much cares for you, you'll just hurt her. And if she hates you, she doesn't deserve you," Naruto yelled back.

"Don't insult Konoka-Ojou-sama! She wouldn't dream of hurting anyone. She is a kind and gentle girl," girl retorted, anger twisting her face.

"Ahh, sorry, I just can't stand to see people get called or call themselves monsters," Naruto replied, before chuckling, "Though from what you said, I think you know how this Konoka would respond to you running away. And you obviously care for her. So as Kakashi-Sensei always said, 'Those who don't follow the rules are scum, but those who abandon their comrades are worse then scum.' So screw the rules."

Setsuna and company stood stock still as they stared at the man. Blinking slowly as they tried to figure out what happened.

"Was it something I said?"

Author's note of noteworthiness: I tried to get this chapter out on June 12th as a birthday gift. Everyone not on Eastern Timezone in the US and to the East got this on the correct date. Quite a few delays slowed me down, not limited to my muse refusing to do anything, getting called to do things in the middle of writing, and my personal 'favorite' computer turning off and losing work. I hope this first chapter peaks your interest. I do need the help of the audience to prove how much potential this has to go on.

This is like a personal project for me to increase my writing ability after I laid it down for about 6 months. My speed has decreased, and I really have some difficulty writing scenes that I didn't used to. My dialogue has hopefully not gotten to rusty though. So feel free to critique. I won't ask for you not to flame, because frankly it won't matter if I do.

That being said, this is a harem fic. And the only one I'm confirming for the Harem is going to be Zazie (and maybe Poyo later on) Rainyday. Maybe even the one scene wonder and Paio II much later on is possible, but I'd prefer you to discuss amongst yourselves who you want in. I won't accept either Nodoka or Yue though. To much Negi love so far. Everyone else is fair game, though I will only do Setsuna and Konoka as a set. I can't split them up. Just remember to give me a reason for some of them. And as much as I like, because she is hot as a reason, it doesn't work. Makie is obviously going for the dog-boy Kotaro latter on.

Naruto is going to be powerful, but the problem is he has no control. Ninjutsu for him is going to be nearly impossible at first, except for three techniques (not that he use any but those three anyway). And the Rasengan is going to be overpowered as well. He has no chakra control. If he tried the tree exercise, he would blow up the tree. So don't worry about him destroying people right now. His collateral damage is sky-high. You don't use an atom bomb to kill a single normal person. And that is what most of his techniques do. Plus Naruto doesn't like to kill if he can help it at all.

Tl;dr;

Send in votes for harem members. Nodoka, Yue, and Makie are out of the running for Naruto. Setsuna and Konoka must be together. Zazie is confirmed for Naruto, Poyo is a possibility, and anyone from anywhere else can be chosen. Even that one scene wonder. And Paio II.