"We're through the hard part, they're in." Dick said with a tone of uncertainty, the words were uttered only to assure himself as he knew what Wally would say, what Wally was feeling.

"Who are you kidding?" The redhead spoke hushed and with a sense of anger that Dick had been afraid of all along… "It only gets more dangerous from here." Dick looked away not wanting to admit Wally was right. Of course he was…Dick saw the mission as just that, it was a task at hand and those involved were the members with their own duties to perform. The four of them were a team…a secret team going under and taking down the bad guys in ways far more dangerous than any of them was comfortable with.

Wally saw it as the woman he loved risking her life for something he wanted her to leave behind.

It was that thought that annoyed Dick; Artemis wanted to stay a hero, she wanted to be the fighter, to protect the innocent, to make her life worthwhile. She gave it up for Wally…at Wally's request and the two faded out of his life, at least in that aspect, that of a hero.

"She wants this." Dick said without thinking, instantly regretting his words. He backed off from the edge of the building and started to turn out, to jump down, to run away before Wally could do anything. He felt Wally's hand pulling at his collar, snapping him back. He started falling to the ground. Normally he would have swerved and used his momentum to move upward but in the midst of falling he saw Wally's face, his eyes red and watery and he knew he should have kept his mouth shut.

"Does she?" Wally came closer to his friend, fists clenched and paled from the lack of blood.

"Wally…" Dick didn't have the words, the mental focus, or even the calmness to explain himself…to take back what he said…to prevent what was about to happen. He knew what Wally's was thinking, all his feelings over Artemis' near death the last mission, with Tula, finding her bleeding, broken behind the ice block Tula had placed to keep her body protected from the explosion.

"Did you hold her," Wally began, "all those nights she woke up screaming, screaming Tula's name, begging her not to go?" Wally's fist went up for a brief moment, hanging there in the air, in the night, ready to strike but the expression of Dick's face made him pull it down and turn over to look at the water where she had disappeared, into the depths of the ocean.

"She saw it all Dick. We could feel Tula fade but Artemis…she felt it, lived it. That ice…she could see through it all and…she watched Tula…burn." He pushed his hands into his pockets; his eyes seemed to be diving into the water, following a signal no one but he could hear, following it to her, trying to reach her…to be with her.

"I know." Dick finally managed to speak. Tula's last thoughts were with them all, M'gann link…but it was Artemis who witnessed it, Artemis who nearly died…and…

"I know you care." Wally said as if trying to comfort his friend but his voice betrayed him, it came out unpleasant, unforgiving…he could only stay as calm as the feeling of her hand in his…holding him…without it he could easily become reckless.

"I do." Dick knew what Wally really meant and he was ashamed. They hadn't spoken of it in a long time. It came as no surprise that Wally brought it up now, now that Artemis was so far away from him. Everyone from the original team was well aware that Wally had been equally traumatized as Artemis had been by the events leading to Tula's death, but unlike Artemis, he had never fully recovered from it. Kaldur pressed on after his loss being the Atlas, that figure of the group that continued on his virtuous ways and it was that ideology of hope and faith….of belief…it spread to Artemis who healed from it. She and Kaldur grew close in their way and she could move on from that horrible day because of Kaldur. Wally however, could not.

The image of Artemis, twisted, distorted, a corpse for all intensive purposes…it was an image that seemed to stay with him every moment he wasn't with her, and only because having her with him he could see the image was a lie, a memory…

Then there was Dick, in all that had happened, when the link was finally broken it was too late. His thoughts of Artemis as he tried to reach her were felt by them all, although overlooked by most. It seemed as though they were buried under everything, all the screaming, crying, begging of that day, but it wasn't. Wally remembered, remembered feeling Dick's pain that matched Wally's…he knew…

"I'm going home now." Wally seemed to say to the sea, and entirely without emotion. He patted his friend's shoulder, a touch he hoped would wash away all the residual anger he had as he remembered his friend, his best friend cared. He knew he did not want to put her in danger as much as he had not wanted her to go. It soothed him in a twisted way known to a lover fearing for his love.

"Wally…are we okay?"

"We're best friends, we always will be...in the end." He let go of his friend and started down the stairs of the building, he could hear Dick behind him saying "I'll keep her safe."

Wally whispered, "I know."

…

He didn't want to head back to the cave, he didn't want to explain Wally's reaction because it was an account of lies, a form of imagination in it's darkest sense. He could parade the emotions, torture his teammates feelings with Wally's accusatory yells, Wally falling to his knees…Wally devastated.

He knew it would break their hearts so he had resolved to take only one motion. To shake his head and be done with it, they knew that Dick was close with Artemis and Wally and the idea of telling of the other's death had it's own brand of torture to it. That would be enough, one movement, shaking his head and it would be done, they'd leave him alone. But not Wally…he had to add the words "Give him space."

But what of the others? The shaking, the disbelief that she was really gone…

How could he explain that to M'gann, Conner…Tim who saw her as a sister now as he did, or…

"Damn it." He couldn't be contemplating his feelings for her now. Those had been feelings he'd battled for the last two years having grown up with her, having walked the halls of Gotham academy with his arm slung over her shoulder, pulling at her ponytail, teasing her…at first she'd push him away, then she grew to enjoy the little troll and the friendship that became after that, a bond, a trust. Had she known who he was? Of course there was always the possibility, the sense she had with each cackle he let out, she had to have known.

"She's my best friend." One of many Dick had told himself, it was only natural. Two teens having chosen the life of a hero, both living in Gotham, going to the same school, on the same team, without reservation, what could stop them from becoming so close?

Like brother and sister. That in itself was the team…a family. One night had changed that, one night, one fight, and she was at his door, the door of Wayne manor that is. She was a regular there after the first few years, as was Babs and Bette, all the Batkids, eventually Tim and now Stephanie…what was once Jason.

The fight…that's what it had been about Jason. Dick was angry at Bruce for reasons he couldn't understand. Jason, the boy who took the mantle for such a brief time, at it angered him…not to be replaced…no, the idea that Bruce would always require a robin. At first it made sense, he would always need a Robin, that whimsy only the songbird could give to a brooding Bat…but Jason was a different character, a broken boy in a way very unlike Dick. His death reminded Dick of life choices, what it meant to be a hero…

"That's why I screamed her name." He tried to convince himself…the screaming could easily be explained by an act, but he knew there was more to it. He found himself rationalizing it as repressed emotions over Jason, Jason's death…Artemis lying there…that's where the emotion had come from. Right?

But no, he knew better, and recalled that night when Bruce had stormed out of the manor and Dick was alone with Alfred who could not console him. He soon found the blonde waiting at his doorstep with box of sourpatch kids.

He eagerly welcomed her in; she passed him the candy with a throw that hit his head, intentionally making him laugh. They'd sat down to talk, she'd patted his head, made a few quips, had him smiling again. Why hadn't he called Wally? Or Babs? They were his best friends too, they could be here just as easily as Artemis could and still…he called her first. That's when he should have known, that's when he should have realized he'd fallen for her…or maybe…

"Damn it." He hated the word "fallen" and it made him cringe and shake. He looked back up at the stars and sighed. It took a few hours more for him to get it, to understand. It wasn't until she was fast asleep on his couch, it wasn't until his head leaned into her, staring at her lops, touching her face, wondering what it felt like to have the petal like lips upon his own…that he knew…and still he allowed himself to touch hers, a sleep beauty who only twitched at the touch, the kiss…unaware of his actions.

He's kissed his best friend's girlfriend and seconds later he regretted it. Why did he always make things hard for himself? There was no love like that of Artemis and Wally, they were like his own parents, perfect in everywhere together, two pieces fitting brilliantly, the couple that made skeptics believe in soul-mates…and still…here he was…kissing her.

"Damn it." All he did was ruin things, ruin his own little family as he had accused Bruce of not caring enough, of not worrying about his wards and the life he brought them into…he'd hit a nerve with Bruce and that had sent him off. Thank God Artemis was asleep, thank God he hadn't tried while she was awake…he wouldn't have been able to…to look into her eyes and kiss his best friend? His best friend dating his other best friend and to betray a third best friend in that, Babs who he didn't know what to feel…his life came down to lines crossing one another.

Now, here he was looking over the water, worrying for both her and Kaldur, Kaldur the valiant, the brave, Artemis…he knew…he loved her that much was true. But was he in love with her? Or the idea, the notion of love…being in love with love more so than the actual person…

"Damn it."

…

Kent nestled on his owner's lap, saddened in way as he absorbed all the depression Wally felt. Wally patted the dog and smiled. He had always wanted a dog but his mother was allergic. Artemis picked Kent out, she named him after the first man to propose the two of them, Wally and Artemis…the speedster and the archer, were meant to be.

"I owe you." He said aloud. Although he did not believe in the afterlife, he did belief Kent Nelson could hear him, could know and…and maybe even have his spirit watch over her somehow…

"Love makes you stupid," Wally said as he pulled his dog up to look into his eyes, "You start believing in things you would never believe in…like angels…" He wanted her to have an angel, an angel to watch over her, protect her; he wanted to be that angel. At a younger age the thought was laughable, now…it broke his heart…and he was never that guy…that is until Artemis came along.

"I'm a sap." He meant to make himself laugh but his voice cracked and he held the dog close to him, it was their baby, this dog…he didn't want to let him go. He walked over to their bedroom and laid down on their bed, keeping their puppy close and pushing his head into the pillow for a long needed sleep. He opened his eyes and grabbed her pillow, pushed it to his face and inhaled her scent. There's a power with smell, a sense often taken for granted…but if anything it was the strongest of all senses, it was the memory inducer…and if one were to close their eyes, they could smell the memory to the point of seeing it.

He could see her now, wearing her black cami, with her red Stanford sweatpants, her hair in a messy bun, eyes showing all the signs of intense sleep deprivation and her hands typing furiously on the computer.

"She's beautiful." He said into the pillow. The muffled sound of his voice reminded him he was not living this…it was just a memory. He left the pillow go, and tucked it under his head wanting to smell her for the rest of the night.

He didn't want to think of what tomorrow would bring, all the mourners giving him condolences…he hoped Dick would tell them he wanted space, to keep them away from all the people that loved her, who would say her name and make him believe she was gone. Only four people knew she wasn't. Two were away and one would never say, if he wasn't careful he might give in to the illusion that she was really gone.

"But I'd feel it." He rolled his eyes as he said it but he knew it was true. If Artemis were to…die…he'd know before anyone else, he'd know because that's what it means to be soul-mates. It means being the one person one's soul can connect with a level untouched by others, a level where one can feel things, see things others miss. Like a mother and a child, two people connected…if one holds that connection it lasts forever…but it make that connection with someone who is not of one's blood, there…soul-mates…

"In a nutshell." He laughed quietly as he wasn't a poet and to get in depth with all his feelings of her would be a long headache, a very long headache. He wanted to keep it simple. She's the one and everyone one else who disagreed could go to hell.

He rolled over on his back, Kent already asleep at his side, big surprise. Now all he needed was to sleep, sleep for hours and prepare himself for tomorrow, or technically today. Maybe if he called Dick, went over a plan…but he hadn't, he was too upset…and…he knew. He knew how Dick felt…or at least how unsure he was over…her. He wanted to be possessive about it, keep her under his guard, punch Dick…punch him over and over and keep him away from her but those were passing thoughts that grew more so out of his anger for Dick asking her to help him than his own jealous. Dick was his brother, he knew his past, he knew loving others always brought confusion for him. Artemis was practically his sister and he wanted to hold onto that. The poor kid thought the only way was romantically, of course he wouldn't act on it…but still.

"He loves her." Wally rubbed his temples trying to clear his mind, trying to think through his own confusion about how he felt. He wanted Dick's feelings for Artemis to go away yet he knew Dick needed her, needed him, needed anyone who came close by the very fact he pushed them away…mostly the females. Artemis, Babs, Zatanna, Kory and Artemis. Dick was afraid of feeling love for someone because he was afraid it would lead to marrying, a family and that family breaking as his had. He was happy with his team, they were his family but of course romantic feelings would always arise, Wally knew that better than anyone.

"He can't have her." He blurted out. He smacked his head against his forehead, cursing himself. Artemis wasn't a thing to be had, she was a human with feelings, emotions and for some reason she had feelings for Wally, she was in love with him and he with her.

All the ache of her departure came back to him and his jealousy faded. He missed her; he wanted her here. He wanted to live out here in California, to be the lab rat, and for her to be the badass lawyer or whatever it was she was going to end up doing with her law degree and together things would be perfect…kids running around safe, perfectly safe, forever. He knew that was a lie, there were heroes for a reason; because things aren't safe, life is dangerous and he had the rose colored glasses on too long…or he pretended to have them on. Life came to the edge of things, always…and he couldn't believe she'd lasted so long with him always worrying about her to the point of annoyance.

"Because she loves me." He turned into the pillow again, clutching it, feeling the fabric of the pillowcase and sighing heavily, so heavily he started choking on his own salvia. He started coughing violently, closing his eyes and holding onto the pillow, feeling every bit of it as if she were really here. The pillow became wet soon enough with the touch and eventual soaking of his tears. He didn't know what to make of himself, he could hear her bones cracking, he could see the blood pouring, he could see her gray eyes, like the moon…his moon archer…he could imagine it all over again and…

How did Kaldur do it, how did he go on with Tula gone? Artemis was away in the ocean, hidden, dangerously close to be killed but still as of yet she was untouched. How did Kaldur keep going?

"He's a damn saint." Wally's voice shook, he was too emotional at the moment to think of anything but of all the ways things could go wrong. She was so human, more so the he…a metahuman she was not. She was, however, a trained assassin…technically, that is what she was, trained to kill, she could keep herself safe…but still…there's only so much her body could take.

The pillow grew increasing wet as the tears increased, streaming off his skin onto the floral pattern of her pillow. He pulled himself up afraid his salty tears would overpower her scent.

Her clothes…He got off their bed and opened their closet, sitting down on her side, where she kept all her shirts, some covered with coffee stains she hadn't managed to get out, her pants sprinkled with grass stains from her time on the soccer field, her rarely worn dresses that took his breath away...she had one for each anniversary they had. He sat there feeling pathetic, pathetic for hiding here and crying, pathetic for missing her and feeling weak over a woman but pathetic…being pathetic…it didn't last long because he knew this is what love meant, missing someone so much and desperate to hold on to them.

"Holding." He grabbed one of her dresses and held it against his chest. His eyes were steady, serious, the whole scene was closest to a prayer he had ever come, not since Tula's death when he found himself praying to every god he knew to protect her…and here he was, practically praying to a God he didn't believe in to watch over her.

"Send in all the angels." He whispered as his head leaned against the wall, "All of them."

…

For now, no one else was on the ship. It was her and Kaldur, deep under the water. She had questioned him earlier about his father wondering where he had gone, Kaldur simply replied that these were the hours he was expected to sleep and thus his father did not concern himself with his actions during this time so long as the tracker said where he was suppose to be. Dick had reprogrammed the signal to hit whichever tower Kaldur wished; they were safe.

"Aren't you tired?" She asked as she felt a chill go down her spin. Water terrified her for reason she would never understand. Perhaps nearly drowning so many times was the reason…

Kaldur caught sight of her distress and ignored her question, he stayed awake for as long as he did because he didn't think about sleep, he refused to acknowledge the word existed otherwise he'd crash down on the floor and never wake up.

"You're still afraid of the water?" He asked, placing his hand kindly on her shoulder. Years earlier, during an ocean mission, she had been hesitate to go down with the others, he had thought it was because of her near drownings on previous missions, but there was something more, something in the terror she felt in the water.

"You're wondering why he chose me over M'gann?" Artemis smiled at her old friend, her words already with doubt. M'gann would be a better choice, she could turn into a mermaid for God's sake, Artemis' aversion to large bodies of water made her the worst choice, and still she agreed to go because…well because she was given the chance to go back, to be the hero, to feel the rush, to be someone…and…that in itself was a relief.

"He trusts you more." Kaldur turned to stare out of a window, the sea was black, not even fish floated by them, unsettling for someone unaccustomed to the darkness but he grew up in it, living in Atlantis…of course there were lights there, here it was like the night's sky…

"M'gann's changed…" She moved to stand next to him, forcing herself to look out the window and face her fears, she started to tremble. He placed his arm over her shoulder and gave her a hug, smiling at her. As she stared out into the water she felt someone looking for her, she felt it for quite some time before it faded and she knew Wally had gone home; their home.

"Do not worry, you are safe here." Kaldur spoke after a long silence. The two friends were close, as with most of the team, they were brother and sister. When Kaldur discovered his true bloodline, they had only grown closer. It was very much like Artemis and Conner. They were indifferent to each other for quite some time before they realized how similar they were, both having the blood of evil running in their veins, cleansing themselves by saving the innocent and making their own fate. Kaldur soon joined their club…although now Conner and the rest of the team would make Kaldur their enemy for what they believed he had done. It wasn't fair for Kaldur, so virtuous and so broken; he had lost the love of his life and now this...

"How do you do it?" He knew what she meant, he knew just about everything she meant by now. It came with the understanding between two equals who shared similar histories, at least where they're parents were involved.

"I miss her…but her memory, I can't let her death go in vain, I can't…rage is not the answer, blame is not the answer, justice is." She looked up at him, staring at his eyes, she knew he was seeing Tula, the slight smile on his lips told her it was a good memory, perhaps the one of the two chasing dolphins, she hoped it was.

"You don't deserve the crap you're getting."

"All will be well." He said in that soothing manner only Kaldur could deliver. She gently punched his shoulder; he always had a level head.

"You should be a blue lantern or something Kal." He chuckled and patted her head, she punched him again and he pretended to scoff. They were making light of a dangerous situation, they had to or else the pressure would get to them, or else the feelings of their loved ones would sink in. Tula was gone, Wally was far away, it was too much to think about. For now, they could at least enjoy the ride…but soon they would be back into the battle, both pretending to be people they weren't.