First story in a while and my first Big Bang story. I own nothing
Chapter 1: Fear is Only in Our Minds
Penny was always a hit with the boys.
Ever since she started developing she noticed their heads would turn as they watched her strut her stuff down the hallway as if she were on the catwalk. Truth be told, she loved the attention she received and the boys that did get a chance with her also enjoyed her hard shell. She may look like a Barbie doll on the outside but on the inside she was not all sugar, spice and everything nice. The problem with Penny is when she figured out what she wanted, she went for it no matter what the cost and most of the time she got what she strived for. So when she decided to pursue an acting career instead of remain at a community college in Omaha, she went ahead and moved to Pasadena. That was where she met Kurt.
He was every woman's fantasy. Large muscles, a body sculpted to perfection, and a charm that could make anyone putty in his hands with the snap of his fingers. When Penny realized that Kurt pursued her over other women she eagerly entered a relationship with him, feeling as if she had just won the lottery. All she needed was the Hollywood career and life would be sweet. Unfortunately her semi-charmed life came to a crashing halt when she bombed her first audition and Kurt started becoming possessive.
At first it wasn't too bad. A phone call or text during the day asking what she was up to and that he missed her. She found it endearing, falling even deeper in love with him. Then one phone call became four, then five, six, seven, at one point she missed twelve calls from Kurt. He left voicemails feeling hurt and angry that she hadn't answered him and by the last call she could tell he had been drinking heavily since his message was barely comprehensible. When she arrived home he was waiting for her on the couch wanting to talk. Still depressed by the failed audition she told him the talk can wait and headed for the bedroom. Kurt got up and grabbed her by the arm telling her they needed to talk now. She made the mistake of pushing him off her which ended up with him shoving her to the floor, hitting her head on the leg of a hallway table.
He was yelling at her. Telling her something but she just couldn't concentrate. Her head hurt so badly. Finally he went back to the couch and continued to watch whatever was on the television. After a little bit she stood up feeling a little dizzy and made her way to the bathroom. She felt a bump on the back of her head but thankfully no blood. Kurt had never done anything like this to her before and she passed it off as him being drunk. She was pleased that when he woke her up the next morning he showered her with kisses and delightful lovemaking before taking her out to breakfast. Kurt apologized for his behavior. He explained work was stressful and wanted to spend more time with her. She forgave him and promised to try and make time for him. And she did.
That is until one day she decided to go out shopping with a girlfriend. Kurt grew angry, thinking she had ditched him to go hang out with other people because she liked her friends more than him. That's completely ridiculous she told him. He called her a liar and smacked her across the face. She started crying and asked him to stop. He hit her again. She lay on the floor of the apartment unable to stop her sobs from spilling out of her body. Her stomach hurt, her face stung and she started to feel resentment bubble up inside. The beatings became more frequent after that night and she no longer looked forward to his brief honeymoon stage where he would shower her with affection and promises of never hurting her again; Penny would rather he stay angry all the time that way she would be better prepared for his next episode. She rarely went anywhere other than auditions but soon she began to find her desire of acting dwindle. There were days where she rarely wanted to get out of bed and her friends had tried to contact her but she knew if she spoke a syllable to them Kurt would blow his stack.
She hated feeling isolated from the world. She wanted to be a part of it, she wanted to matter to people; it was the reason why she wanted to become famous but now that the dream was gone, what else was there to chase? Kurt worked most of the time which left her home alone wallowing in self-pity. No, she wouldn't do that. She had to do something with her time. Perhaps get a job and add to the income. She was sure Kurt wouldn't mind if she made a little money. Penny brought up the subject and was surprised he said he was okay with it. The next day she applied everywhere and anywhere and fortunately the Cheesecake Factory was hiring. Her relief of getting a job not only stemmed from the fact she was doing something productive but now she could forget about Kurt just for a few hours and not be stuck in the apartment, scared to death about who was coming home to her.
Four years passed quickly and she was still at her job but now her money no longer went to her account. Instead Kurt gathered up as much as he could for himself and would blow it on booze or some prostitute. Penny knew he started becoming unfaithful to her and she dare not confront him unless she wanted another broken rib. However it was starting to become too much to deal with and Penny knew she had to leave sooner rather than later. But where would she go? Kurt watched over her money, she didn't have friends anymore, and what if he found out where she was? She had a feeling if it came down to it, Kurt would kill her. She nearly broke down at work, emotionally and physically tired from all the hurt her boyfriend had caused her. She wished it would all go away.
"Are you alright Penny?" The tall blonde looked up and saw her friend Bernadette standing beside her with worry in her eyes.
"Yeah I'm alright, just really tired is all." Penny stood up and straightened out her uniform. She took a step forward and winced. Her beating was worse than others she had received and her rib had not completely healed since her last trip to the doctor. The worst thing was the bruise that came along with it. It was nearly the size of Texas and hadn't gotten much better.
Suck it up she told herself. With a deep breath she walked over to her next table.
"Hello my name is Penny and I'll be your server this evening. What can I start you off with?" she spoke in her friendliest voice.
"We don't usually eat here, I don't know what's good." said the first voice. Penny looked and saw the voice belonged to the tallest man in the group.
"Just get a hamburger, you like hamburgers." This came from the man with the glasses who looked like he was stuck babysitting his five year old brother.
"I like the hamburgers at Big Boy and you cannot make the assumption that I'll like the hamburgers here. Besides they have more than one hamburger here while Big Boy just makes it simple has one." Penny was not in the mood for this back and forth nonsense.
"Our barbeque burger is like the Big Boy." She explained. Maybe this will assuage him to finally order. "Excuse me but in a world where there is already a Big Boy, why would I settle for something that is like a Big Boy?" his sassy attitude was the last straw for her.
"Because you are not at Big Boy!" he looked astonished at her and ordered the barbeque burger. His friend next to him ordered the same thing not looking at her. After she wrote down their orders she went back to the kitchen before heading outside for air.
Now her job was being affected by her tumultuous relationship. She knew it was wrong of her to snap at the man but at the same time she couldn't control her emotions anymore. Finally she let the tears fall. It had to end she told herself. She couldn't continue this any longer and quite frankly she didn't deserve it. Penny thought about what she needed to pack and how to make sure Kurt wouldn't find her. Pasadena was a decent sized city but she would have to go off the radar. She continued through her shift thinking of ways to execute her plan. However she knew she would need help pulling this off. Fortunately she knew the person who would be willing to lend a helping hand.
"Bernadette, can I talk to you for a few minutes?" The smaller woman turned away from her car and looked at Penny. "I-uh…I have this…friend and..uh.." God this was harder than she thought. Come on Penny she thought to herself, you can do this just tell her.
"Penny, are you sure you're alright?" Bernadette placed a hand on Penny's arm and that is when she crumbled.
"Kurt hits me!" she sobbed. "It's been going on for years now and I can't take it anymore Bernadette, I just can't!" Bernadette embraced the taller woman in a hug and let her cry it out until she was ready to speak again.
"I want to leave him but I have nowhere to go, he takes all the money I make and I wouldn't know how to get rid of him completely." She explained as she wiped her tears on her jacket.
"You can always crash at my place until you find your own. And why not get a restraining order?" said Bernadette.
Penny had thought of filing a complaint but was too afraid to have to admit what she allowed herself to succumb to and have other people butt into her personal life. Asking her to relive the pain of each bruise, each broken bone, and then the dreaded question of why she let it happen. She blamed herself for allowing it to continue. She could have left after the first hit but she stayed and now this situation was her fault. That was what frightened her about going to the police. She didn't want to be judged by them because she felt they would side with Kurt on her deserving her punishment.
No. She would not let herself think that. The police could help her; they would help her. Perhaps a restraining order was best.
She thanked Bernadette for the comfort and offer and headed back to her apartment where Kurt was passed out on the couch, beer cans spread out in front of him. Penny changed out of her uniform and crawled into bed. She closed her eyes and thought about what it would be like to be away from Kurt. Like all other little girls she wanted to find her Prince Charming. At first she thought Kurt was it but now she knew better. Still she clung to the hope of him being out there and hopefully finding her in the predicament she was in and taking her away where she would be protected. Of course that only happens in fairytales and Penny had to rely on herself only to get out of her messy life.
Maybe if she changed her name. Dyed her hair a different color and moved across town. It seemed a bit of a stretch but it was worth a shot. She would have to tell the restaurant her predicament so money could be transferred to another account and she was not looking forward to that conversation. But she would not give up her job just because her meathead of a boyfriend scared her. She got that job on her own and she'll be damned if anyone took it away from her.
Tomorrow she would go to the police station during her break and see about the restraining order and pick up her paycheck herself so she could have some money. As Penny thought about it more, she became confident that it would happen; a feeling she hadn't experienced in quite a long time. She jumped when a heavy snore came from the living room, followed by incoherent mumbling until silence finally took over the entire apartment.
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