This is pure crack for the lady I love. Only warning? Bad puns lay ahead. Rated for Zack being an inappropriate puppy.

Thanks for being awesome, ShadesofImagination!

Zack unceremoniously slammed the can he was holding onto the table across from Angeal. "This," he stated, "is the best thing ever."

Bemused, Angeal looked at the can. Sweating with condensation, the unusually tall black can, striped with neon green in a vibrant 'M', didn't look particularly special; it certainly didn't look like "the best thing ever." Then again, this was Zack... He resisted the urge to examine the can further and merely looked up at his student with a brow quirked. "What is it?"

"Monster," Zack said simply.

Angeal had to keep his face schooled away from any twinge of shock or surprise. "Monster," he repeated, voice flat.

A succinct nod, followed by the pop and hiss of the pull tab. Zack downed the can in several quick gulps, exhaling on the finish. "It's a new energy drink. Really works, too." He tossed the empty can into a nearby trash can and waltzed off. "You should try one! Monster is delicious!"

Angeal later tried a sip of his own. He wasn't sure what was so great about carbonated-cough-syrup flavored sugar water.

. . .

"Sephiroth is a what?"

"He's a monster. In bed. I swear."

"Zack, I don't need to hear thi—"

"No, you do. Oh gods, like, his cock is like ei—"

"Zack."

"It is a monster cock, Angeal. A monster cock."

"What is it with you and that word?"

"Monster? It's a good word. And a good thing!"

"...I'll take your word for it."

. . .

The music was deafening. Angeal had no idea how Zack and Genesis hadn't lost their hearing by now, considering their enhancements. The stereo was valiantly blasting at maximum volume, vibrating on the coffee table and inching ever so much closer to the edge with every obnoxious bass beat. Hands clamped over his ears, Angeal tried not to scream in frustration.

Zack was in the midst of shouting the chorus line, adolescent vocal cords straining with the effort. "THAT BOY IS A MONSTER!"

"HE ATE MY HEART, HE ATE MY HEART!" Genesis warbled after him, gyrating his hips in a purely obscene manner.

Angeal stomped over to the stereo and sent his fist through it, effectively destroying the (supposedly?) female singer's electronically-enhanced voice mid-lyric. The two "singers," as it were, continued to scream along to nonexistent music before stopping abruptly when they realized the music had in fact stopped.

"Angeal!" Genesis cried, voice cracking before he cleared his throat. "You're interrupting my Lady Gaga!"

"Yeah, what the hell, Angeal?" Zack frowned deeply, still jittering a little.

"Your what?" Angeal began before pressing his fingers to his forehead. "Never mind, don't tell me. Monsters again?"

"We're monsters," Genesis proclaimed happily, grabbing Zack around the middle. Zack nodded as Genesis elaborated. "Little monsters. Lady Gaga fans."

"I don't care." Angeal put his hand up. "I'm leaving."

"But Angeal, she's... she's awesome!" Figurative stars alit in Zack's eyes. "You have to borrow her CD at least."

Angeal bit his lip and closed his eyes, preparing for the worst.

"It's called The Fame Monster."

...He left anyway.

. . .

When things came down to what they were, Angeal couldn't help but recall the ways Zack had used the word. Every time he used it... it was light, it was fun... something to be enjoyed. Angeal had thought of the word as the kind one uses to describe the awful things, the demonic things. That was, until now.

Now, he just kind of looked at his reflection, at the shimmering white over his shoulder, and figured there had to be another word for it. Maybe it didn't matter.

After all, in Zack's world, "monster" is a good thing.