Author's Note:

Jesus Christ. I'm such a terrible person for not posting a new chapter since last year. Honestly, uni work is HARDCORE and ongoing and I haven't had time to write anything to my original novel and fml. Just...forgive me? :(

I don't know when the next chapter will be up, but hopefully this will sort of make up for lost time?

SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY I LOVE YOU

Though Tony despises his new clothing, he can't help but enjoy how Loki keeps glancing at him and sweeping his eyes up and down his body. As they walk up to the roof, Tony tucks his arms behind his back and clasps his hands together before leaning in towards Loki's ear.

"I bet you couldn't wait to get me into these clothes," he whispers, hot breath hitting Loki's neck and ear, making him shudder.

"Yes, but now I can't wait to get you out of them."

"Please," Bruce says with a heavy sigh from behind them. Tony and Loki hadn't realised just how close the scientist had been. Tony chuckles to himself. Loki frowns.

When they reach the roof, Thor calls upon Heimdall, and the Bifrost opens ready to take them to Asgard. Before they depart, Tony swiftly locates Pepper and rushes towards her as best he can with the (damned) cape fluttering around behind him.

"Pep."

"Tony."

"I'm going to freaking Asgard."

"I know you are." She repositions his helmet. "Be polite and bow to Odin. Remember your pleases and your thank yous and don't you dare drink too much. Just…try to stay out of trouble."

Tony feels a warmth wrap around his heart. "God, I love you. What would I be without you?"

Her head tilts to the side as she calculates an answer. "A mess." Tony nods in agreement. "Now go. They're waiting."

He kisses her on the cheek. When he looks up at the others, Clint is absolutely most definitely staring directly at Pepper's ass. He glances up at Tony's own hard stare and winks. It's a wink that says "I've totally screwed her and therefore I can stare at her ass all I want."

Now, it's not because Tony is a genius that he knows this: Pepper had told him what they had done and Tony had whooped for her, proud that she had finally gotten laid.

"That's the first time in what…ages?" he had said.

Pepper had rolled her eyes. "Of course not." Her red face had given her away nonetheless.

In the present, Loki has his hand out and Tony places his own in it.

"Are you ready?" Loki asks softly. Tony tears his eyes away from the smug archer, looking his god in the eyes and forgetting everything but that very moment and what was in store for him no matter what his reply is going to be.

"No," Tony replies with certainty as he's consumed by a blinding light, and then everything goes dark.

When Tony comes around, he's being held up on his feet by Loki, and before him stands a giant, terrifying black guy in a giant, terrifying, golden horned helmet with a giant, terrifying, long golden sceptre in his giant black hand.

"Well hello," Tony slurs, still slightly dazed. "You're very big, aren't you?"

"At least he is dressed appropriately," the giant says with no hint of amusement, ignoring the swaying human. "From what I've seen of human fashion, it would not have been fit to be worn before Odin."

"Precisely," Loki replies, squeezing Tony's arm just a little tighter. Tony blinks hard and snaps out of his daze. The giant black god man looks down at him with warning eyes and suddenly Tony can empathise with an ant that doesn't know whether the oncoming boot will land on its face or not.

"Please don't land on my face," Tony voices aloud, caught up in yet another daze. When the giant looks almost confused, Loki pushes the small of Tony's back to usher him along.

"You'll have to excuse him, Heimdall. He's…acclimatising."

Heimdall does not look impressed.

"Well I never," Steve gawps, stepping around Heimdall with Thor. Tony and Loki follow soon after, as Tony finds it hard to tear his eyes from the giant.

"Really Steve? No one says 'well I never' anymore." Tony's jab at Steve barely makes it out of his mouth before he too drops his jaw at the sight that greets him. A vast, golden city stretches out across the visible horizon, and below them is never-ending space filled with innumerable stars and distant galaxies. "Well I never," Tony breathes.

Loki grins, wrapping his arm around his waist. Thor places an arm around Steve's shoulder. The two humans remain motionless, the only movements being the constant dart of their gaze from one surreal reality to another.

"Welcome to Asgard, friends."

"Loki, I can't – oh my god. This is…" Steve can't even finish his sentence. Thor waves to the citizens in the street who part to allow them passage on the horses that Loki has managed to finally get Tony astride. A few people offer them gifts of free food, and acknowledge the humans with curiosity and wonder. Small children run alongside the horses, giggling and asking who Tony and Steve are.

"Special guests," Loki whispers to a particularly small boy whose round eyes are a little too large for his head.

A girl hands Tony a bag of fresh peaches in a burlap sack, and he looks at Loki as he raises one to his mouth.

"Yes, it's safe to eat," Loki chuckles. Biting into the peach, Tony is met with an extremely un-peachy flavour. That isn't to say it isn't delicious and far more so than the peaches of Midgard. Tony doesn't ask questions as to what they are. He just eats.

"Steve, haff you tred this fwuit? Oh mah gohd." Tony loses a bit of fruit from his mouth and it slips down his chin. "Cwrap."

"Yah know, I acshully haff?!" Ahead of him, Steve turns and also has a mouthful of fruit. "This is thuh bescht fwuit like, evah."

Tony takes another bite. "Oh mah gohd."

Luckily for both Tony and Steve's dignity, they have finished their fruit by the time they get to Gladsheim.

"Don't we need to just go straight to this Eir lady? Because I mean she did say sunset tomorrow and it's getting late and then you'll only have like a third of a day or so and - "

"Odin expressed wishes to meet you before we continue our journey, Tony," Loki sighs. "You're not getting out of meeting him."

"But. it's. Odin."

"And I'm Loki and that's Thor."

"Yeah but - "

"And I'm Captain America," Steve interjects.

"No one cares, Steve. Shut up. But seriously, this is Odin. We're talking the bearded, omniscient god of gods who has been around for I don't know how many millennia. How is that your father. I mean of all the dad's you could have had."

"Don't I know that," Loki snaps, suddenly seething. "You shut up, Tony Stark. I'm well aware of who he is and don't really want to be taking you in there for him to rip me apart for taking on a human as a partner. You are far beneath me in his eyes and I would not wish the judgment of Odin upon anyone after feeling it so heavily upon my own already weighted shoulders."

Tony recoils slightly. Then he feels terrible. "I'm…I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking…I…"

Sighing, Loki rolls his eyes and his face softens. "It's fine. I shouldn't have…Look. Let's just…get this over and done with."

"And you are sure they will both pass as suitable witnesses?" Frigga asks.

Odin sits in his throne, the other seats of the court of Gladsheim empty upon Frigga's adamant request. His expression is unreadable to Tony, who remains to kneel beside Steve. When they entered Gladsheim, Tony heard his heartbeat pounding in his ears and his footsteps were – to him – thunderclaps that bounced from the walls and echoed around the hallowed halls. He looked at Loki, but the god was fixed on the white-haired ancient sitting in the throne at the top of the steps. Odin's gaze was slowly shifting between Tony and Steve. He looked intrigued.

"I am certain," Loki says.

"And this man, Tony Stark," Odin booms. A shudder runs down Tony's spine as his name is spoken and he freezes. "You love him?"

"With all my heart," Loki replies with no hesitation. At this, a heat grips Tony's heart and unfreezes his entire being. He smiles.

"Then I condone their presence in Asgard, and declare it acceptable for them to travel with you to seek audience with Eir. Good luck."

Just as Tony thinks it's all over: "Tony Stark?" Frigga steps down from her place beside the throne and approaches him.

Don't flip your shit stay calm it's only Frigga wife of Odin calm Tony calm jesus lord oh god. "…Yes?"

"Rise." He stands. Her eyes are full of kindness and love. Tony is all at once at ease, as though it is only he and she in the echoing hall. "You saved my son. Asgard owes you a debt of gratitude."

"It was nothing. Really. I mean, I love the guy so - " He's silenced by her arms around him in an embrace. After a moment's shock, he returns it, drinking in her scent of honey and wild flowers.

"You saved my son from death and from himself. You are welcome to Asgard whenever you wish. We are very glad that Loki has found you."

"You sure he's okay with that arrangement?" Tony jerks his thumb towards Odin. Frigga smiles.

"If I was making the wrong choices, my husband would have made that clear by now. He trusts me." She turns to Odin and meets his gaze. The ancient god's eyes crinkle as he replicates the grin on her face.

"My wife is correct."

From the corner of his eye, Tony sees Loki's eyes widen in disbelief.

"Your folks adore me," Tony says with a smirk as they leave Gladsheim.

"I cannot….believe it to be so….but it is," Loki mutters, almost to himself alone. He looks at Tony. "You persist in astounding me."

"Kinda comes as part of the package deal of loving an inventor. We tend to astound, and do indeed sometimes persist in doing so."

Steve yawns loudly. Night has fallen on Asgard, making any attempt at travel impossible.

"We will leave just before sunrise," Thor says decidedly. "Mount Lyfia is less than half a day's journey. We will make it there before sundown. For now, we must sleep."

Tony grins, exhausted, and slithers his arm over Loki's chest, holding him close. A moon of some kind that definitely isn't the one that Tony's seen all of his life on Earth shines through the windows and shimmers on the beads of sweat that trickle down his forehead, and he places a kiss on the god's shoulder.

"I love you," he coos, giving him another kiss. Loki shifts onto his side so that their eyes are on the same level.

"I love you too," Loki replies with a smile, pressing his lips against Tony's. "That was good for you, yes?"

Tony lets out a short laugh of disbelief. "You heard the noises I was making right? Of course it was good. Why'd you say that? Wasn't it good for you?"

"No no! I just…" Loki bites his lip.

"What?"

"I just worry that I may hurt you. Because I have strength far beyond yours and I fear I may not realise whether or not the noises you make are that of pain or pleasure."

"Look, I'd let you know if you were hurting me. But just for the record, you never have. Does that clear your conscience?"

Loki smiles again. "Indeed." He kisses Tony again, and this time doesn't stop until he's removed most of the breath from Tony's lungs.

"Sleep well?" Steve asks with a yawn the following morning. The sun is not yet up but both are dressed in their Asgardian clothing ready to leave for Mount Lyfia. Tony beams at him, sporting the widest smile he can muster.

"Nope."

"I…I should never have even asked..."

Thor looks truly worried. "Tony, I will ask for chamomile tea to be brought to Loki's chambers next time you stay here in Asgard. It aided my sleep as a boy, so I'm sure it will aid yours."

Tony lets out a laugh, and even Steve can't help but cackle.

"The horses are ready, your greatness," a servant says in a small voice from the doorway. He darts off as soon as he's spoken.

Thor claps his hands together. "Then we must leave at once!"

Loki walks in with Frigga, their hands linked. "Are we to leave?" he asks.

He sounds incredibly nervous. Tony notices the tight grip he has on Frigga's hand.

"The horses are ready, brother. Are you?"

Loki sighs heavily. "I just want my magic back. So yes. I am ready."

Author's Note:

If you want to know, I have a radio show every Wednesday from 5 till 7 GMT on /smuc radio and I'd love if you could give me a listen tonight! :'D There'll be links to it on my tumblr (loki-dokey) so you can access it from there too! :D