The Lily and the Spaceship

"I…I-I love…l-love…"

"Arggh! Cut! Cut! Lan, what are you doing?"

Flustered, Lan turned her face away towards the ocean. "I'm sorry. I'll…do better, next time."

The film club president clapped her bullhorn against her chair. "This is the fifth time we've run this, Lan. What's so hard about saying 'I love you?' There, I just said! It's just a movie, just acting. If we don't finish this by tomorrow – "

"Why don't we take a break?" Madoka said. She unclasped Lan's hands from her own and turned towards the director. "We've been filming for over an hour. I'm sure she's just tired."

The director glanced at her watch. "Well, alright," she said. A chorus of cheers followed her words and she turned her head to glare at the girls standing next to her. "But don't slack off, club members! The completed film is due tomorrow. I expect everyone to be back here in ten minutes!"

Tugging at Lan's sleeve, Madoka led her away from the rest of the film club. Barefoot, trailing damp footsteps in the sand, the two of them made their down the narrow strip of beach. The waves lapped gently at their feet. It had only been three days since the flower of Rin-ne bloomed and already Kamogawa looked as pristine as it ever had. The sky was clear and cloudless. The blue-haired girl gave a heavy sigh.

"I'm sorry, Madoka," Lan said. "Maybe I'm just not cut out to be an actor."

"That's nonsense." Madoka girl gave her friend a clap on the back that sent her reeling into the water. "You're a terrific actor. Those last five scenes went by perfectly, right? It's just this one that's giving you trouble."

"I don't know why it's so difficult. I just can't seem to find the words."

"I'm sure you'll get it soon. It's like the director said. All actors have some scenes that don't come as easily, right?"

"I suppose…" Lan tilted her head. Curiously, she peered at her friend. "And what's yours, Madoka?"

The brown-haired girl took two steps back. Her eyebrow twitched. "Uh…I don't know…Kissing scenes, maybe?"

Lan burst out into laughter. "Kissing scenes? Really? Have you done something like that?"

"W-Well, no. Never." Blushing, Madoka rubbed the back of her head. "But just because I haven't done it doesn't mean I won't struggle with it! And I'll probably struggle with it. I guess."

"Y-You – kissing scenes!"

With a final giggle, Lan fell on her back into the sand, clutching her sides. She felt Madoka's irate glare on her back as distinctly as the sunlight. It shouldn't have been so funny – but Lan laughed anyway, if only to disguise the wrench in her heart at the thought.

The two of them were alone now, the rest of the film club only specks on the horizon. Lan stared up at the sky. She had never wanted to star in the film. The thought of hundreds of people watching her on screen made her cheeks burn. But the Jersey Club was the Jersey Club and Madoka was Madoka, and before she knew it she was in front of the camera, clutching Madoka's hands and struggling to say I love you. It was all an act, all false – but that was precisely why she hadn't wanted to say it. She had wanted it to be real.

"I'm really going to miss you, Madoka."

Lan listened to the sound of the waves as the water lapped tenderly at her feet. She had never liked Earthen beaches, those uncomfortable things. The ocean wind carried with it the stench of salt and somehow grains of sand always managed to worm their way into the most hard-to-reach crevices of her body, but today she didn't mind. Even those annoying seagulls sounded almost relaxing. She raised her arm, splaying her hand against the sky. Peering through her fingers, she could see the black ships of Le Garite suspended against crystal-blue backdrop of the sky.

With a plop, Madoka fell down beside her. Their hands were almost close enough to touch. Kusha, kusha, the waves came up to their thighs now, threatening to wet their skirts. Idly, Lan began to trace lines in the sand. Madoka, she wrote – and the waves lapped ashore and all that was left was bare, smooth sand.

"I almost wish – " Lan's breath caught in her throat. "I'll think of you every moment on Le Garite."

Madoka punched her on the shoulder. "Don't be so gloomy. It's your last day, right? We still have to make some good memories before you leave. And if you're ever feeling lonely you can always just watch this movie, starring the both of us! We could win an Academy Award together, I bet – er, they do have DVD players where you're from, right?"

"No, I'm afraid not," Lan said. "But I can just bring a DVD player along with me."

"Ah, right…I forgot about that."

Madoka's embarrassed chuckle drifted over the water. It was close to here when they first met, Lan remembered, all those months ago. On a narrow strip of sand she saw a brown-haired school girl strip off her clothes and dive into the ocean to save a drowning boy. Her school uniform had floated away in the wind. Lan had stumbled after it, picking at the tattered clothes fluttering in the air, but when she finally retrieved the uniform and looked back the brown-haired girl was already gone.

The call of gulls rose and fell with the crests of the waves. Lan turned her head, staring straight at Madoka's face. The other girl was grinning, blushing slightly, her face framed by soft brown hair waving in the ocean wind. The yellow bow she used to keep her hair out of her eyes swung haphazardly. In the clear summer sunlight the faded gold of Madoka's irises shone like stars.

Fiercely, Lan clasped Madoka's hands in her own. It was like clasping a little piece of the sun.

"I love you."

The impulse had grabbed her as suddenly as summer rain, but after Lan had said it she realized the moment was as perfect as it would've ever been. I love you. Madoka's hands, as cold as ice, clenched tightly beneath her own. Lan caught a glimpse of her pink tongue peeking out behind her teeth. The other girl's body was completely rigid. Her brown eyes were as wide as lantern orbs – and then, slowly, it was gone, the tension bleeding out of the air like ink from paper. Madoka's mouth stretched into a broad grin.

"I knew you could do it, Lan! That wasn't so hard, was it? Now you just need to say it in front of the camera!"

"That's…That's not…"

Lan unclasped her hand and turned her face away, ashamed of herself. The sand was coarse against her cheek. It was better this way, she tried to tell herself. She would be leaving tomorrow and this way none of them would get hurt. But to leave it all at this…Those long dark nights spent on a planet light years away beckoned, and she knew she would regret it if she left it at this. So Lan steeled her cowering heart. She balled her fists at her sides. Biting her lip, she turned once again towards her friend.

"Madoka…"

Her voice trembled with longing so naked that even Madoka could sense it now. Instinctively, the brown-haired girl shrank back, her eyes wide with fear and a little bit of anticipation. Lan brought her hand to Madoka's face. The other girl flinched and uttered a soft oh when their skin touched. Lan's fingers traced the delicate ridge of Madoka's cheekbones, curving around the arch of her nose, gliding down towards the gentle contours of her lips before finally stopping at her chin, and, cupping it with four fingers, she tilted Madoka's face forward.

The wind stopped, the sun darkened, the call of seagulls fell to nothing and the ocean stood still. Their lips touched for only the briefest of moments. Lan would have gladly made it last longer but the heat rising up her face was almost unbearable and in another second the embarrassment would've lit her hair on fire. But that one moment was enough – she tasted ginger and cinnamon and peppercorn and, inevitably, a little bit of sand.

They broke off and immediately Lan stood up and dusted the sand off her uniform. She turned her back on Madoka and stared at her feet. In the water she saw her own reflection: hair tangled, face flushed, eyes trembling, mouth pressed in the portent of a pout. The only sounds were the crash of waves, the screech of seagulls. Tightly, she clenched the folds of her skirt and waited.

"I…I guess I'm not so bad with kissing scenes after all, huh?"

It was a lame joke but Lan laughed anyway. Her laughter rang clear into the air, disguising the sobs of relief shaking her body. Behind her she could hear Madoka also getting up. Brushing away her tears with the back of her hand, Lan turned around. Madoka had on the widest grin she had ever seen and her face was as flushed as a setting sun. Her own face must have looked exactly the same way.

In the distance, past Madoka's shoulder, Lan could see the tiny silhouettes of the film club jumping up and down, waving for them to come back. Above them the black hulls of the spaceships gleamed brightly. They were almost out of time. This would be her last chance, then. She had always wanted to try it and this, she thought, was as good a time as any. Smiling, staring straight at Madoka with the entire ocean and sky in between them, Lan extended her right hand and twirled a perfect circle in the air.