Well it's finally here and I can only apologise for the long wait, especially since this chapter has been sitting on my laptop since August, requiring only a fine tune-up before publication. Sighs.
Mira SeverusSirius Black-SnapeThanks. :)
AemryAvalonTony and Hela will have some bonding soon enough, especially since he is a man-child himself. But I like the idea of Loki being occupied with Thor to notice his daughter's needs and feeling bad about it later.
Hellsleprechaun I guarantee Tony will make an effort… eventually. Or more accurately in the next chapter!
GuestIt's here now! Ta-da!
foxlinThanks for the comment.
Again, thanks to all commenters, favouriters and watchers!
Chapter 5
Hela frequently had bad dreams and at importuned times no less.
Tony Stark did not believe in coincidences.
Upon invading their couple-time three nights in a row, Loki suggested remaining with Hela in the guest bedroom just as Tony considered locking their door. In response he simply nodded and gave an encouraging smile and all-rounded tried to appear the supportive partner.
"I'm certain it will pass," Loki spoke gingerly. "Hela is not accustomed to sleep. In Hel one does not sleep, one has no need, much like eating. Once she has adapted to Midgard, I wager she'll be impossible to wake!"
Tony didn't feel like pointing out that nightmares were slightly different to insomnia. And even one night without Loki had touched a nerve. It felt like a victory for the other side.
I've got to stop thinking like that. She's just some dumb kid. Tony reprimanded himself. He knew he was being selfish, immature and even at times a little cruel, but damnit it all, Loki was still his!
Lying on his stomach, arms offering support from underneath the pillows, Tony bathed in his approaching-waking-state for as long as possible. At the very least he had had a decent night's sleep. Hela was a fidgety sleeper and occasionally stuck out her bony limps. Small, gentle strikes to be sure, but unlike her father, Hela possessed no magical control over her body temperature while unconscious and each time Tony awoke with a jarringly cold start.
It was then that Loki stormed into the room.
The icy atmosphere made Tony cautious. He shifted his weight into an upright position and leant against the head rest. Bambi brown eyes popped open and for a moment Tony stared unblinking. Loki clicked his tongue, a sign of his annoyance. Tony grinned unwittingly.
"Is something the matter, honeybun?"
With great effort Loki suppressed his clear vexation and through tightly pursed lips he hissed. "I am Loki, the first of his name. The first son of Laufey, Ruler of Jotunheimr, adopted brother of Thor, God of Thunder and heir-apparent to the Æsir throne. The consort of Angrboða, Witch of the Iron Woods and of the stallion Svaðilfari, I am the father and mother to kin both terrible and monstrousness. I am trickster, shape-shifter, the silver-tongued who yelps about wicked things, the disgrace of all gods and men and scourge of all the nine realms. I am neither a God to be trifled with nor openly mocked, Antony Edward Stark!" He gave Tony a dreadfully accusing look.
"The audacity, the sheer impedance by which you would address me, am I some hapless maiden? Shall I blush like one? Would that please you? You… you… pathetic mortal man! You will rue your deeds, mark my works Tony!" With that Loki turned sharply on his heels and sped away.
Tony sat motionless, gazing at the empty doorframe while only managing to fumble out a "Huh?"
"I think I missed something honey. Honey?" He called out to no prevail.
With a small yawn, Tony rubbed his eyes and slid onto the edge of the bed. Getting to his feet, Tony figured he had better have a private chat with the trickster and see if he could get to the bottom of the matter. If Diva-Loki resurfaced, there would be a line of people queuing up to tell him 'I told you so!'
Padding bare foot down the corridor, Tony entered unnoticed into his own spacious living room. The widescreen was blaring in the background, something bright and chipper, a vaguely reminisce kids show. Hela was plonked upon the cream couch with her white ribbon baby blanket covering her lap. Loki knelt down beside her holding a plate of toast. He lifted a slice to her lips and tried to tempt her into taking a bite. Instead Hela pressed her tiny body back into the cushions as if Loki was holding out a scorpion. When he moved closer, she raised her blanket firmly over her mouth and shook her head.
Loki sighed gently and placed the plate on the coffee table in front of her. It was then that he noticed Tony and turned away in a huff. Feeling more and more perplexed Tony shuffled pass the seated Hela whilst stifling another yawn. Hela seemed transfixed with the cartoon playing, three cute little bug-eyed girls fighting a green monkey with multi-coloured lasers. Weird.
Hey how come Iron Man didn't have his own show?
Wait…
Oh. He just got it.
Awkwardly he embraced the trickster from behind and planted a wet kiss on the back of his neck. "Good morning, Buttercup,"
Loki reined back his head and pushed Tony aside. "How dare you continue to mock me mortal,"
"Okay, calm down, calm down. I mean at least give me a chance to explain before you turn me into a toad," Tony smirked. Loki simply crossed his arms neatly across his chest, tightened his lips and maintained his glare.
"Buttercup is the name of a powerpuff girl but it's also a type of flower-"
"So you confess you find me akin to a flower? Is that an appropriate title for the God of Mischief?"
"More or less appropriate than a powerpuff girl?" The muted glare told him to move on. Quickly.
"It's just what couples do, dear. They adopt pet names,"
"Pet? Pet! You think me your pet?!" Loki grounded his teeth.
With every sentence Tony was digging himself deeper. "Pet names are considered terms of affection between partners. Darling, sweetheart, cupcake, honeybun, buttercup, is just how we mere mortals show our fondness," Tony shuffled forward and tugged at Loki's hips. "If you find buttercup belittlingly, I promise not to use it again snookum's,"
They briefly shared a much needed kiss. When they parted, Loki had curled his lips upwards. "I think you mortals have a pre-occupation with sweet things,"
"Must be why I'm so addicted to you,"
Loki chuckled lightly. "I've been called many things in my time. Sweet is certainly not one of them,"
"Must be an acquired sweetness then,"
Loki paused and looked thoughtful. "I suppose buttercup is not a bad name, if it's meant with affection,"
"That's the spirit!"
"I think I shall adopt a pet name for you," Tony arched his eyebrows.
"Yes I shall name you Narfi,"
Bemused Tony shook his head. "I don't think you quite get it. A pet name is not a new name entirely. There existing things like treats, flowers, fluffy baby animals and the like,"
"I think I prefer Narfi,"
Tony grinned and quickly stolen another kiss. "Whatever pleases you sugarlips,"
"You're just putting random words together now, aren't you?"
"You look dignified," Loki stood loftily balanced on one leg. "I've grown rather accustomed to your usual scruffy attire. Special occasion is it?"
"I'll have you know, I've been known to put on a shirt and tie from time to time," Tony finished buttoning up his shirt and then reached down for his shiny purple tie. "Have to meet with the board of directors today. Have to make a good impression or Pepper will be displeased," He turned and caught Loki mid-leer. "Hey, don't objectify me!"
Loki wrinkled his nose. "Surely these directors answer to you? Does the company not bare your name?"
Tony made a tiny wince. He really didn't have the time to go into the excruciatingly boring details of how corporations are run, especially to Loki. Though it might be more fun than actually attending his meeting, Tony had inkling that Loki would suggest blowing the board to smithereens. Or worse he might actually do it. For all Loki's seemingly good behaviour, Tony could detect a subtle edge of boredom. Even fatherhood would not keep him content forever. Tony rubbed his chin and considered what could be done to break up the humdrum life at the tower.
Where was a supervillian when you needed one?
But his concerns would have to wait. There was still the inevitable meeting to attend. Typically Pepper would have gone on his behalf, as she handled most of the business these days. But this time his presence was required. The board consisted of twelve stuffy old men, old friends of his father that were just as disapproving. The last time they had demanded his attendance was to lecture Tony on his Iron Man antics. For a heartbeat Tony wondered if they had gotten wind of his relationship with Loki.
Loki seemed to have read his mind. "No one outside Fury and the Avengers knows of our arrangement,"
"How can you be so certain?"
Loki smirked mischievously. "Because I'm magic darling,"
Uh huh how reassuring.
Tony slipped his shoes on and stopped. Removing his right foot and lifting up his shoe, Tony pulled a face. How did a jammy piece of toast get there?
"You're late, Tony," Pepper breathed low as she met him at the reception.
"I know, I know. Let's just get this over with," Tony spoke with a mark of annoyance. Loki had only laughed at Hela's prank and waved it off.
In the conference room Tony arrived to an ominous silence. Slumping his briefcase on the table, the object immediately sprang open and several large brown toads proceeded to leap out.
In the midst of screams and shouts, Tony flopped into his chair, head clasping into his hand
Irritated and thoroughly wet through thanks to a freak and unpredicted downpour, Tony arrived home and headed directly to the living space. Loki sat neatly crossed legged, flipping through a gossip magazine with an impish expression across his face.
"Do you actually read these Tony? They're so very droll!" He glanced over his shoulder. "Why are so wet? Have you not heard of an um-brell-la?" Loki liked to sing-song mortal words he found amusing.
"Loki, we need to talk,"
"Not so loud. Hela is taking a nap," He indicated to the opposing sofa where a tiny Hela lay curled in a ball, covered by her blanket, sucking her thumb. In sleep she seemed so peaceful, so helpless. Tony sighed and motioned for Loki to follow him into the kitchen.
After he had finished explaining his humiliation at the hands of Loki's pint-size daughter, Tony realised he wasn't going to get the desired response. It figured. Hela's daddy was the God of Mischief after all.
"I had no idea Hela was so competent with her magic, what a clever little girl she is. Tony dear, can't you take a simple joke? I was up too much worse at her age," Loki chuckled.
Exasperated Tony threw up his arms
"C'mon Tony," Steve finished his shot and accepted another. "Admit it, if it hadn't been on you, you would have found it hilarious,"
"Hey Stephen, aren't you supposed to be on my side by default!" Tony felt the familiar alcoholic buzz hitting him. "The kid is ruining my life!"
"Don't you think that's a bit of a stretch?"
"Well she's ruining my sex life that's for sure!"
"Umm, too much information-"
"I think this is the longest period in my life I've gone without sex,"
Steve sighed and gazed down at his drink. Being the only sober person at the party was never any fun.
It was late or early depending on your point of view when Tony stumbled back into Stark Tower. Loki was already asleep with Hela tucked up beside him in the guest bedroom. Feeling dejected, Tony mooched onto the couch with a beer bottle and a classic action flick. The next thing he knew, he was being harshly shaken awake. Eyelids cracked open, an incoherent grunt was give and Tony attempt to roll onto his stomach.
"Wake up you wretched man!" the trickster whispered. "Is it here? Have you seen it? You're not lying on it are you?"
"What?" Was all Tony could manage.
There was a hint of desperation as Loki spoke. "Oh Hela's blanket, that white one she is so fond of. I can't find it anywhere!"
Oh crap.
Tony clambered to his feet as Loki moved to check behind him. "Yeah I've seen it. I popped it into the wash before I when out last night,"
"Blankie?" Hela stood in hearing range and her eyes were as wide as dishes. Quickly she began to snivel.
Without a word Loki disappeared and shortly emerged with the freshly washed and pressed white blanket and immediately placed within his daughter's arms. Hela screwed up her tiny face and wailed harder.
"It's not the same! It's not the same! It's different! It's different forever!" The child howled and tossed it onto the floor.
Unsympathetic to a bawling eight year old and nursing a colossal hangover, Tony decided to let Loki handle the situation while he showered. Hela's shrieking pursued him down the hall.
"Daddy no! Blankie's no the same, it's not fair! He did it on purpose!"
Things had just gone from bad to worse.
Hela 2 – Tony 0
Next time: Tony remembers that he is a billionaire. Also featuring Hawkeye.