So, apparently it's been a year since I've updated this story and I feel really really bad. Seriously I could sit here and apologize a thousand times over even though it wouldn't make a bit of a difference but instead of doing that I'm just gonna give you all this new chapter and hope you don't completely hate me.

Anyway the Wind Blows

The first time Kensi has to leave the house without Allison is a nightmare.

Deeks was almost certain his wife was going to lose her mind, cradling their daughter against her chest as she paced back and forth in the sitting room, drawing out her goodbye until he finally had to step in and carefully take the baby from Kensi's arms.

"It's alright," he whispered, pressing a kiss to her hairline. "The two of us are gonna have fun and you're going to get through today like the completely badass agent I know you are."

He watched her eyes narrow at his choice of language but it didn't take long for her frown to melt into a smile before she kissed Allison's soft hair and grabbed her bag, hurrying out the door before she changed her mind.

The majority of the day was spent doing paperwork as Kensi checked her phone for the umpteenth time and resisted the urge to call Deeks and demand an update. She knew he was completely capable of taking care of Allison and there was no one she trusted more with their daughter but the emptiness she felt as a result of being away was nearly too much to bear.

Thankfully Eric called them up nearly half an hour later and her mind was occupied with crime scene photos and watching Callen and Sam interrogate the suspect they managed to grab just as he was preparing to skip town. By the time they managed to close the case it was late in the evening and Hetty was relieving them for the day.

Kensi nearly bowled Sam over as she hurried for the door.

It amazed her how quickly her nerves seemed to calm as she walked through her front door and set her bag down, eyes roaming the sitting room for any sign of Deeks or their daughter. Though it wasn't much of a surprise she couldn't help the pang of worry that shot through her when she didn't catch sight of them or hear the soft murmurs of her husband nor the cries of her baby and Kensi immediately set off down the hall.

She glanced into the nursery first but found it empty, turning on her heel and heading towards the bedroom instead. Carefully and quietly she nudged the door open and she couldn't help the smile that pulled at her lips when she caught sight of the scene in front of her.

Deeks was sprawled across the bed sound asleep; Allison curled on his chest as his large hand rested on her back. As quietly as she could Kensi slipped into the room and tiptoed towards the bed, reaching out and gently collecting Allison in her arms.

The infant let out a low whine but once she realized it was her mother who had disturbed her nap she immediately snuggled into Kensi's chest and quieted down. At the loss of body heat Deeks began to stir, frantically sitting up and looking for the baby that was just on his chest before he saw Kensi and immediately relaxed.

"Hey," he whispered, leaning up to catch Kensi's lips in a kiss before ushering her onto the bed, letting her curl into his side as she kept Allison close.

"Did you have a good day?" he asked, running a finger over Allison's tiny fist.

Kensi shrugged and stroked the downy soft hair on her daughters head, looking up at Deeks with tired eyes.

"It was alright, Sam and G did most of the work. I was pretty useless."

Her cheeks flush with slight embarrassment but Deeks just grins and shakes his head.

"C'mon, you're not useless. You were just distracted. I know if I had left my gorgeous husband at home I wouldn't be able to focus on work either."

With a roll of her eyes Kensi resisted the urge to elbow him, not wanting to wake the sleeping baby in her arms and instead gave a wry smile before it melted away and the seriousness overtook her.

"I'm serious, I don't know I'm supposed to leave her at home every day and focus on work when all I want to do is sit here and just…watch her. It's like I spend all my time protecting other people but what's gonna happen if I'm not here to protect her?"

She heard Deeks sigh but she couldn't make herself look at him and instead she let her head rest on his chest as he moved his fingers through her hair.

"Kens, you are an amazing mother and an amazing agent and sometimes things are going to clash and one will need you more than the other but don't ever think that just because you're not around twenty four seven that you're doing something wrong."

He pressed a kiss to her hair and Kensi felt the panic and uncertainty that had been haunting her all morning melt away. While she knew that work and family were going to clash Deeks' reassurance that she was always going to be a good mother seemed to give her the peace of mind she had been searching for since she found out she was bringing another life into the world.

And while it might take some time to adjust to her new situation she knew as long as Deeks was by her side they would be alright.