Author's note: This story takes place at some indefinite point in the future, when Red John will be finally - and conveniently - out of picture. Established Jane/Lisbon. Just a piece of fluff written for the Paint It Red Ficathon - prompt: "It's me or the couch".

Of couches, girlfriends and other things

As he wandered around the dimly lit bullpen – an empty cup of tea in his hands – Jane peeped briefly into Lisbon's office. She was still dealing with an almost unending stack of paperwork, part of which he had undoubtedly contributed to create.

With a sigh he went back to his couch. Sinking into its voluptuous softness, he vaguely fancied that the old piece of furniture was actually embracing him – just as a lover was wont to do.

...

It was half past midnight when Lisbon finally emerged from her office.

First thing she saw was Jane dozing on his brown leather couch – a Cheshire cat grin still lingering on his lips. Jane himself resembled a satisfied cat taking a nap in his favorite spot by the fire.

Her eyes twinkled mischievously as she tiptoed to his side. Then she kicked the cushion he was resting his head on.

"Take it easy, woman", he murmured without bothering to open his eyes. "You're hurting my poor couch".

Lisbon crossed her arms. "Jane, you know that you spend a ridiculous amount of time on that horrible-looking thing? Much more than you spend with your own girlfriend, as a matter of fact".

"Meh. Didn't know my girlfriend was actually jealous of a piece of furniture. Which, by the way, is far from horrible – this is just about you being mean, and you know it".

"Come on. You're more jealous of your couch than of me".

"Technicalities. You're perfectly capable of putting any unwanted admirer in his place. While my couch can't defend himself if some random stranger decides to sit on him".

"What if they're not entirely unwanted? What if I chose not to dismiss them? Perhaps one of them would be more willing to give me his undivided attention".

"You'd never do that".

"How can you be so sure?"

Jane decided to play along with her. "Are you going to cheat on me, you little minx?"

"You'll never know. After all, sooner or later a woman grows tired of settling for second best".

"Well, at least the couch would never betray me".

She pinched his arm. "It's me or the couch, Jane. You have to choose".

"That's definitely not fair. You're a cruel, vicious woman, you know?"

"I know. What's you answer?"

Without notice Jane grabbed her arm and made her tumble just on his lap.

"Let's reach a compromise. What about you on the couch?"

Lisbon hummed appreciatively as he started trailing kisses along her neck. "Not too bad a thing, maybe. You'll just need to be a little more… convincing".

"As you wish, ma'am", he agreed easily – a moment before his mouth finally joined hers.