It was your first time. It was strange really, more of an awkward shuffling of limbs in a pleasureful movement. You're not going to lie, it felt really really good! Karkat always made you feel safe, special, handsome…

You both exchanged favors. Fingers wandered and body parts licked and sucked red. Words spoken in breathless hushed whispers. It was everything you ever dreamed of and more. The night you turned 18 you decided you where ready. You two had talked about it for a long time before you actually took affirmative to say it's okay. You let him touch you down there for the first time that night. Right before you took the next step and… yeah.

You barely touched him as much as you wanted to, his main focus was on you and you alone.

He made you feel really special. But, still you feel weird about it.

Today you saw him and you had no desire to talk to him, or even look at him. You didn't want to touch him when you walked to town together. You pulled away first whenever you kissed. You felt wrong. Weird. You didn't want to be alone with him.

But even later on with your group of friends. He would scowl and joke around like usual, wrapping his arms around you. Still, you felt uncomfortable. You tried to move away. He noticed.

He soon got worried, he constantly asked if you where okay and you would nod. But you weren't. You where sick to your stomach. Every time you looked at him your stomach would churn and your heart would skip a beat.

You had to call your dad to come and get you.

"D-dad" you hiccup softly and hold your stomach tightly with one hand. "D-dad can you c-come and get me… I-I don't feel so good…must h-have been something I ate… o-okay see you soon…" Karkat sits concerned next to you as you bend over the toilet of the restaurant and lose your lunch. He rubs your back carefully and it just makes your stomach clench tighter. "P-please don't touch me…" you shake as you speak the words, and he nods. "Understandable. Do you want me to get your stuff ready for you?" he mumbles and stands up carefully. You nod and cough a bit, dry heaving as he walks out of the bathroom.

The second he's gone you feel relief. And slowly you flush the toilet and begin to cry. You don't even want to look your own boyfriend in the eyes…

You close your eyes for a minute, thinking about that night with him. His hands on your hips, eyes locked. Lips close enough to touch, but don't, not yet. He smiles those kind of smiles he only smiles for you and holds your naked body close to his. You are absolutely in love. His skin feels so smooth so good against you. Then how come when he touches you now it's so….strange. You open your eyes and clench your teeth together to keep from vomiting again, letting tears fall gently down your face.

"John, your dad's here… wait are you crying?" Karkat bends down and lifts your bangs out of your face a bit. You shake your head and cough away tears. "N-no my stomach just hurts really bad. I'm sorry I ruined the night. I'm just pretty sick is all." You stand shakily and give him a fake smile. He smiles back and kisses your cheek.

Your stomach flips and churns roughly.

"I love you." He whispers.

You nod and wipe your face franticly, taking your bags.

"Thank you, Karkat. Goodnight." He nods and watches you walk out and into your dad's car.

"You okay bud?" your dad automatically puts a hand to your forehead. "Yeah dad I'm fine can we just go home…"

(A/n- Well this is chapter one. I don't know where the idea really came from but I just went with the writing mood. I really hope you enjoy it. It won't be too long I hope… Please review? It would be nice to have some outlook on this.)

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