This fanfic was based off of a video on YouTube I found called 'the story that only I know'. Both the song and the video put to it are soo cute and sweet. It inspired me along with another Fanfiction I read called "Filled to the brim" by RukawaGF. If you've never heard of it, I seriously recommend it to you, it's just so good ;_; (must warn you though it has A LOT of smut scenes and starts off with shikizaya). Aaanywayy, I hope you enjoy reading this story and please review, will make my day ~ :3

The sight out of the window was relaxing and calm. A backdrop of a setting sun with the slowing city made Orihara Izaya feel content…and sleepy. He leaned back on his chair, facing the window, and closed his eyes.

Earlier on that day the group were sitting on the roof of the school, enjoying their lunch. As usual, Shinra was chatting away, practically to himself, going on about all his scientific experiments and theories. However today was also one of those rare days in which Izaya and Shizuo Heiwajima were not fighting. These days would only come once, or if you were lucky, twice a month. Instead of fighting, they sat on opposite ends of a bench, eating lunch with Shinra and Kadota in between them, keeping the two away from each other as much as they could.

"Shinra, please pipe down…no one is really listening to you..." Kadota spoke to his friend firmly. Shinra pouted as he turned back to his lunch, silence coming upon the four people yet again. This was how it would usually be when both Izaya and Shizuo hung around with the other two. Kadota and Shinra both too scared to say something that would get the other men fighting.

A few more minutes passed before the silence was broken by Shizuo's voice. "Oi, guys. Tonight...Tonight do you wanna go star gazing with me?"

They all turned and looked at him as he just continued to stare out over the busy city.

"I will!" Shinra said, his childish excitement coming out in his voice.

"Hmm…me too" Kadota added.

Izaya smiled slightly to himself, turning a bit away from the others. He was sure he wasn't invited.

"And the louse? What does he say?"

For a few seconds Izaya's face showed his surprise at these words before his usual grinning mask came back.

"Why, it would be a pleasure."

That's how they got to where they are now. Sitting up on the grass, staring in awe at those stars, shining above the pitch black park.

"Look, there it is. Altair, Deneb and Vega, the summer triangle." Shizuo's finger traced the shape in the air as he spoke, a slight smile playing on his lips.

"Yeah...It's so-"

"Romantic!"

Kadota was stopped from his thoughts as Shinra cut across him, yelping his opinion instead.

"It's just romantic! You've all heard the story of the summer triangle right? Ahhh! If only I brought Celty with me! I could have told her my feelings for her and we could have held hands while we gaze at the stars before we kissed! Wait, forget the kissing, we can't do that but… hey! What are you guys pulling those faces for!"

Both Kadota and Shizuo were looking at each other from behind the now kneeling Shinra, eyebrows raised with an amused grin. They burst out laughing as Shinra stopped voicing his childish and clichéd romantic dreams of him and his roommate, also the urban legend of Ikebukuro.

"H-hey! What are you laughing at! Is it because I love Celty? Or that I do have these sort of fantasies about us? Ne! It's not nice to laugh at people!"

Shinra whined, sitting back down and pouting, looking back up to the stars in an attempt to ignore his two friends who were still laughing at him.

All the while, Izaya had been sitting next to Shizuo, looking up at the stars with his knees tucked up to his chin. He could still see in his mind Shizuo, pointing up to the skies with such a gentle smile on his face. A smile Izaya had never really seen before on this man. It seemed to affect Izaya more then he wished it to, making his heart beat a bit faster and his perfected mask to falter and let his true emotions show through.

The laughter made Izaya turn his head to see what was going on… he had really spaced out more then he should have. But yet again, the look of content upon Shizuo's face made his heart flutter… No. this isn't what he wanted. He didn't want to fall for such a monster like Shizu-chan. He didn't want to fall for anyone. Emotions got in the way of things, they could easily take control of someone and make them do things out of 'love' or 'care' or 'kindness'. Izaya Orihara was above those emotions. He could live without them, his only love being that towards his precious humans.

And yet, why did it affect him so much to see this blonde smiling so happily? Off all people, why was it him who could create the tight feeling in Izaya's chest, set those butterflies free in his stomach and make his heart pound against his chest? Since when?

Actually… Izaya had realised what these feelings were some time ago. He just didn't want to admit it but he was also tired from running. Tired of hiding from these feelings yet wanting to be with Shizuo and confess… he wanted to end his confusion but he couldn't find the right moment to do it.

Maybe this was his chance…Shinra had mentioned confessing to Celty under these stars...Maybe, just maybe…if he confessed now…

Izaya looked down and saw the edge of Shizuo's untucked shirt poking out to the side, within his reach. Looking down at the tops of his knees, he took hold of it. It was now or never…

Shizuo felt a tug on his shirt. It was gentle and accidental but it took his attention from his two friends, one trying to reason why Celty would and does love him as the other playfully teased him and listed of the reasons why she wouldn't.

To be truthful, Izaya had been quiet all the time they had been here…that was either something to worry about or be grateful towards but more likely it meant he was planning something. His plans almost always spelled trouble for the people around Izaya, Shizuo usually being the main victim. That's why when Shizuo turned his head, his cheery smile was replaced with a scowl. But even that was wiped off his face as the raven haired teen he was now looking at almost seemed to be hiding himself. In any case, his hair covered his eyes as his head faced down at his knees which were still up next to his chin.

Something was off with him. For better or for worse though…

Orihara Izaya was a hard person to understand and his true emotions barely ever showed through so seeing him like this, almost trying to hide himself and looking uncertain, maybe even scared, surprised Shizuo.

The grip on his shirt tightened and Izaya lifted his head a bit, still keeping it turned away.

"Shizu-chan..."

This is it…

"Listen to me, just for a while…"

Somehow…

"Please..."

Don't be surprised…

"Just hear me out…"

These feelings, I can't hide them anymore.

Izaya turned his head further away and took a shaky and slow deep breath. He had to do this. He was fed up of going round in circles with these damned emotions.

"Shizu-chan, I need to tell you something important… I..I –"

"Whaaats up?"

In surprise Izaya let go of Shizuo's shirt, his head turning quickly to look into the innocent and curious face of Shinra which now appeared right next to Shizuo's shoulder.

The surprise quickly vanished from Izaya's face as his trademark grin slipped back on. But this grin was just a mask. It was a mask to hide the mixed emotions which now swirled around in his head.

Annoyed, upset, irritated but mostly, he was hurt.

Izaya sighed over dramatically, his feelings now secured behind that same, perfected mask. "Shinra, you know curiosity killed the cat right?" he said as he locked his crimson eyes with the plain brown ones, sending the other man a warning glare.

He felt slightly satisfied when the other man shrank back as a result of just a glare, making Shinra realise that he had somehow annoyed this man greatly.

"Your one to talk." Shinra replied, almost hiding behind Shizuo's shoulder now as Izaya intensified his glare, silently telling this man that he is in dangerous waters at the moment.

Izaya turned his eyes back to the stars, still grinning and chuckling slightly. He forced himself to appear relaxed, lowering his legs from up next to his chin, stretching one out in front of him and keeping the other half bent as he rested his arm on that knee. "Hehe, I guess that's true…"

He watched the others from the corner of his eye as he pretended to be intently gazing at the winking stars above. Shinra had thought it was best to slink back to his place in the grass, next to Kadota who was now watching the scene curiously, instantly talking in a hushed voice to Shinra as soon as he sat back down.

Izaya turned his attention back to Shizuo.

His expression always gave away his emotions and this time was no different. He looked confused and curious and Izaya could have sworn he could see a hint of anxiety in those hazel eyes.

'What in the world was that about?' That's all Shizuo could think as he continued to stare at this confusing and indecipherable teen whose attention was now directed at the stars which had brought all four people here in the first place.

He looked at Izaya, searching for answers in his body language or his expression. But as usual, Izaya wore his sly grin and seemed to be relaxed and calm, unlike how he was before Shinra interrupted him. His hair had fallen over his eyes again but it's not like those crimson orbs would give anything away, they had always (and probably will always) give the same cold hard stare which only would change when Izaya was amused or wanted you to feel intimidated.

'What was that about? What where you going to say?' Shizuo asked himself for at least the 5th time already.

As if Izaya had heard him, he turned his grinning face back to Shizuo just a small breeze blew, making Izaya's hair fly back across his eyes.

"What is Shizu-chan staring at me for, ne?" Izaya questioned before letting out a fake gasp. "Maybe he is my secret admirer!"

Shizuo clenched his fists and scowled. Just the idea made him angry and sick.

"In your fucking dreams flea!" He growled, raising his fist slightly.

The wind dropped again and Izaya's hair settled back down, no longer covering his eyes.

Shizuo stared slightly, he could have sworn that mocking grin faltered at his words and deep within Izaya's eyes there seemed to be a hint of emotion…

Hurt.

Izaya felt like someone had just pierced his heart with a knife and twisted it. He couldn't tell why those words stung like mad but they did. The expression of irritation and annoyance on Shizuo's face added to the pain and hurt he now strongly felt.

He could have laughed at himself. This was a stupid idea. Even if Shinra hadn't interrupted him would Shizuo still have believed him? And if he did, weren't those words he spoke an obvious sign that Izaya would have been rejected almost immediately?

Izaya was now struggling in order to keep a flawless mask hiding this pain and sadness which made his chest ache. He needed to be alone.

He sighed and stood, looking down at the other three. All eyes were on him. "I'm sorry people. Mairu and Kururi are home alone and I told them I'd be back around about this time." He smiled the best he could and hoped his voice wouldn't betray him in these last few words "Therefore it is time for me to say goodnight and goodbye!" he mock saluted and turned on his heel, walking away as quickly as he could down the path lined with trees.

As soon as he was out of sight, he dropped his cheery act and let his swinging arms rest by his sides as he stopped walking altogether.

This pain…why won't it go? It was a stupid crush he had, that's all it was. Yes, was. He wasn't going to cling onto a hopeless case like some love struck maiden desperate for some attention.

Absentmindedly he reached a hand up and gripped his red t-shirt above his heart. Izaya turned and raised his head, staring up at those same stars which he knew Shizuo could see from his position on the grass.

A single tear rolled down Izaya's cheek and he made no move to wipe it away.

Izaya hadn't said what he wanted to.

He couldn't say it…and he wouldn't say it.

A slam of files on the desk awoke Izaya, his eyes snapping open and he blinked a few times at the black screen with multicoloured dots and flashes on it. Wait… that was the night sky over the city..

Izaya sighed as he realised he had fallen asleep in his desk chair and swivelled it around to face the brewing storm which now stood pretty annoyed behind his desk with a hand on a rather large pile of files. Izaya smirked at her as his greeting, hiding the fact that he still felt sleepy and was slightly troubled by what he had just dreamt. "Ahh Namie-san~ what may you want?"

However, instead of glaring back or just staying emotionless, Namie's face showed slight shock upon seeing Izaya's face. Confused, Izaya touched his cheek with his fingertips and was surprised as well to find dampness there. He brought his hand back down and stared at the single tear which had escaped from his eye and dreams.

Sorry for such a long chapter… I didn't expect it to be this long…anyway I just wanted to say, I know you probably won't be able to see the stars from Ikebukuro as it is close to Tokyo and the air pollution blady dah, but for the sake of this story, pretend you can Also, please forgive me if throughout the story I get my facts wrong about the summer triangle and the story behind it etc. etc. If I do get it wrong, feel free to correct me ^^ now I shall shut up after asking you to REVIEW IT PEOPLE PLEASE!