Author's Note: Holy crap on a cracker! Never realized how long it's been since I updated this… O.O …I apologise *drops to knees and begs for forgiveness*

First off, I would like to say a MASSIVE thanks to all you lovely people that have reviewed and gave the time to let me know what you think, it means a lot. I feel guilty over the fact that I've left this chapter go for so long and so I want to make it up to ye by giving ye this. This chapter has also been written to brighten up my dear friend, My Secret Valentine, who has been nagging me about this for weeks. But alas, we're here now (finally) and without further ado it's time to crack on with this story.

Oh well, to the rest of my readers enjoy!

Tifa cringed apologetically as Vincent shoved two bewildered men out of the way. He quickened his pace, zipping through the crowd as she struggled to keep up. Within seconds she had lost sight of him and glanced around to try to see the tall red-clad figure. Occasionally she would spot Yuffie's head bopping up and down between a few shoulders. How are we supposed to get him to agree to what we need to do next…? Tifa knew what Yuffie would suggest and she had no intention on aggravating the man any more than he already is.

She spotted a stack of crates by one of the makeshift shops and climbed on top of them giving her a better view. She could now see Yuffie a lot better, waving her arms and not caring about the few whom she whacked on the head in her efforts to be noticed. However she did see Vincent slink off towards the materia shop. Hopping off, Tifa grabbed the young ninja by the wrist and pulled her along as they broke into a brisk walk. Upon entering, Tifa's eyes rested upon all the materia shining in various colours; the softness of pink, the harsh and unforgiving glow of the blue and yellow and the calming green. All were neatly aligned in their respective categories and strengths, with labels attached to them. Vincent was leaning against some boxes, his eyes giving off a peculiar gleam as the materia's radiance reflected off of them. Tifa shivered when he glared at her. "Vin-"

"I'm not going through with this!" he barked, his mouth hidden by his collar.

"Ah c'mon Vince." Yuffie laced her fingers together behind her head. "How were we supposed to know that something like that was going to happen? Besides the worst is over. All we need now is a large pair of knockers."

He stared at her incredulously and Tifa wondered if his mouth was open as well. "It's just one day," Tifa reminded him gently. "Neither myself or Yuffie," she shot a quick look at the younger girl, "are going to say anything to anyone."

There was silence for a brief moment and she was beginning to worry what he might say next. He grunted, "Fine."

Yuffie fist pumped the air as Tifa stood there surprised. "Thank you," she breathed, giving him a broad smile. He only grunted in response and stood up.

"Let's get this over with," he said flatly, leaving the shop as well as a few confused customers.

"Too small, make 'em bigger. Hey what size are you again?"

Tifa's cheeks flushed red. "36DD," she said, almost a whisper, her eyes downcast as Yuffie grinned. Vincent was waiting near the exit, eyeing them suspiciously. The plump clerk nodded his head and headed off into the back. Two minutes passed until he came back with a large box in hand and put it into a plastic bag.

At least no one will know what's inside, Vincent thought glumly. After they paid, the two girls came over. "I can't believe they cost two grand - each!" Yuffie exclaimed. "Who buys one boob?"

Tifa shook her head as Vincent's body stiffened. "Beats me but at least we got them." She turned to him. "Next stop: shoes." Yuffie giggled as Vincent narrowed his eyes. "High heels…" She winced, as if in pain. "Do…you know how to walk in them…?"

His eyes widened and his nostrils flared. "Does it look like I wear them?!" he growled.

Tifa sighed. "We'll show you."

Vincent thought shoe shopping would never end, for a while he wondered if they were shopping for him of for themselves.

"Look at these!"

"These would go well with that dress I have back home."

"Dear God look at the price on these!"

He cleared his throat getting their attention. They smiled sheepishly at him and asked the girl behind the counter if they had larger sizes. "Nothing fancy," he warned stiffly. "At least get something comfortable." They picked a nice plain black pair, his size.

Vincent let out a sigh of relief as they got back to the Tifa's van. "Don't get too relaxed," she said, turning on the ignition. "We'll be coming back again." A chill went down his spine; the last time that that happened was when facing Omega on his own. They headed back to Seventh Heaven, where they went upstairs into the loft and helped him practice his new walk. At first he struggled with balance and his ankles shook violently. Without realizing, he grabbed Tifa's shoulder with his claw hand by accident. She shrieked and moments later he found himself sprawled on the ground with a sore cheek and he knew this time it wasn't the shoes that made him fall. She apologized vehemently, rubbing her shoulder as Vincent glowered at her getting up on all fours, his feet wobbling beneath him like a new born foal.

Both girls have never heard the ex-Turk curse so much in the years they had known him. The usually composed man that was now gripping onto their arms for dear life; was spewing out profanities every few seconds that would even make Cid Highwind blush. Eventually, he found a way to steady himself while walking and his steps became more confident and fluid. Tifa had to hold back a laugh as she looked at his face; his expression was that of determination. Almost the exact same determination that she had seen when facing Sephiroth, except this time he wasn't fighting a crazed man with some god complex, he was struggling with a pair of high heeled shoes.

Kicking off the shoes, Vincent bent down and rubbed his sore feet. "Who is the sadistic person responsible for these things…?" he groaned.

"Well now ya know what we ladies have to go through just to impress guys like you," Yuffie laughed.

"When have you ever worn heels?" Tifa asked. She grinned and raised an eyebrow. "And since when were you a lady?"

Yuffie gave her a haughty expression. "The single White Rose of Wutai is the most graceful woman that has ever graced the Planet."

Tifa rolled her eyes as Vincent looked up. "What next…?" he asked sullenly. She bit her lip, he wasn't going to be pleased with what they were about to do to him next.

"Um…" She scratched the back of her head. "We…need to use…" She didn't want to finish the sentence.

Yuffie swung an arm around Vincent's neck, grinning like a fool. "Never thought I'd see the day when I'd have to put make-up on the great Vincent Valentine." What started off as a laugh quickly turned into a cackle as he shot the two of them a death glare.

Author's Note: Again, thank you all for reading. The next chapter will be much, much funnier I can assure you. Don't forget to review, they brighten up my day. xxx