I came up with this as a spur of the moment type thing and felt like I had to go with it and thought it'd be interesting to play around with.

Thank you so much for reading.

Dean was breathing deeply beside her on his side of the bed. His face set in peaceful lines as his chest rose with every heavy breathe; one arm thrown languidly over the top of the pillows.

She wanted to reach out, too gently caress the delicate lines that were starting to crease around his eyes, but she didn't. She kept her hand locked in a tight fist at her side as she struggled not to give into the temptation.

When Dean had finally came walking through the door of their home she could see immediately how exhausted he was. But when Colton and Wyatt came barreling towards him all that exhaustion seamed to dissipate as he took them both in his arms, planting small kisses on their cheeks, and when Sam walked in behind him…the kids all but lost it.

Alice could only watch on in amusement as Sam suddenly became a living jungle gym. Both boys giggling as he lifted them up into the air and flipping them around long enough to distract them away from their father.

His face still beaming with pride Dean had made his way over to her. She'd felt frozen in place. Not by fear or anxiety but of excitement, passion, and love. Her heart was pounding like crazy when his large calloused hands slide knowingly across her hips, snaking their way under the back of her shirt. Alice had inhaled sharply at the sudden contact of heat from his hands on her skin, quickly her body responded by wrapping her arms around his neck, and pulling him closer.

She loved the way he always smelt when he first came home. The smell of diesel fuel, cheap greasy food, oil, and the Impala's engine, and of whiskey but underneath all of that was the unmistakable sent that was him. The whiskey was nothing new to her but ever since Castiel and Bobby's deaths, especially Bobby's, it had become more of a desperate act to dull the pain he wouldn't let her try and fix.

As he closed the remanding inches between them she felt that thrum of what she could only describe as electricity spark between them. For that brief second, before he crashed his lips down on hers, she could read the hunger in his olive green eyes, but also the heavy weight of loss he couldn't shake. All thought was washed away as his lips took hers with that hunger she'd first seen and as her body let out a sigh of bliss she raised herself on tip toe to try and make themselves even.

She didn't know how long they had stood there nor did she care. She'd missed him; missed just being in his presence and she'd be damned if she wasn't going to show it. Apparently, he had missed her just as much as he'd pulled her closer to him, grinding her lower half into his own.

Sam's throat clearing had startled them both out of their hormonal craze long enough for both of them too look back at him and the boys.

"Uh, guys…get a room," Sam said, voice light with teasing.

"Get your own house," Dean had shot back.

Reluctantly he had pulled away from her; leaving a small trail of fresh kisses down her face before he completely removed himself from her.

He'd clapped his hands enthusiastically as he moved forward:

"Now, who wants some late night ice cream?"

As if on cue the boys went ballistic; raising their arms in frantic waves as Dean swooped his arms down to grab a hold of their youngest, two-year old Wyatt.

"It's almost eleven o'clock."

Dean just gave her a wink as he made his way towards the kitchen.

"I'll grab the sprinkles," Sam shouted as he lifted Colton into a fireman's carry, gave her a small wave for an apology, and darted in behind his older brother.

The abrupt movement of the bed shot her out of her memory, her heart thundering in her chest as she watched him adjust into a more comfortable position. Once she knew he wasn't going to wake up, she risked stroking a light touch down the side of his face, and ending with her fingers brushing through his hair. He'd only stirred a bit with his facing seeming to search for the comforting touch she'd just given.

He needed her just like she knew she had always needed him. It's what made nights like these almost unbearable.

Soon she felt the familiar sting as her guilt began to stir in her stomach and her hatred towards herself found its way out through her tears. Angrily, she brushed the tears away, and removed herself from their bed.

Alice wanted to go to their sons' room; to see the perfect beings that they had created together. And their boys were perfect in every way. But tonight-tonight Alice didn't feel worthy of being allowed to take even one step inside the boys room. Instead she just found herself backed up against the wall not even noticing when her legs collapsed from underneath her.

A sharp pain resonated through her knees as they collided violently with the wood of the floor. She didn't care. She deserved pain at this moment; she deserved so much more than just a few bruised knees.

For over 5 years she had been so careful; always so careful.

She could still remember the wicked pleasure she'd felt at finally being released from the pit. Lucifer had kissed her one last time and sent her out into the world to not only do his bidding, but to also do it as covertly as possible.

How was Alice supposed to know that she would end up falling in love with one of the very people she was supposed to kill? Sure, no one was supposed to touch Dean Winchester since he was supposed to be Michael's vessel. Lucifer had specifically stated that he was no to be killed; brought to unbearable pain, sure, but death, oh no.

So Alice had started off her plan without a hitch. It had been easy to set up traps and fake "cases" to lure them in. Hell, the minute she had informed them she was a Hunter, all suspicion seemed to go out the window; not to mention the vessel she'd picked was easy on the eyes. But all of her resolve had completely disappeared when she had been stuck in a car with the boys.

At first, they had driven her crazy. Human this, human that, but somewhere along the line she had stopped finding Dean's singing like gargling glass, and more like something she'd found cute. Adorable even. What had done her in though was seeing the insanely strong bond that both the boys had shared. Alice had never seen a love so strong that it would sacrifice itself, time and time again, just to be able to keep each other around.

Dean had given up his soul to keep his brother alive. Sam had tried to do unethical things, things that had surprised Alice herself, to give Dean more time; to keep him around.

Somewhere, near the end, the lines of friend and foe had ended up becoming blurred. Near the end, Alice herself had tried her hardest to keep Dean alive and to keep that stupid bitch Lilith away from him. But it hadn't worked; at the last minute she'd taken him from her. And with her betrayal still lingering on the air Lilith had informed their boss what she'd tried to do.

Alice was no longer Lucifer's number one. She'd become his new enemy and immediately he wanted her sent back to the pit so he could remind her who she worked for.

For months she'd dodged everything they had thrown at her. A few times there had been close calls but she'd evaded them nonetheless. She and Sam had even started doing jobs together just to keep each other company. The crushing weight in her chest would probably never compare to the overwhelming pain that seemed to consume every fiber of Sam's being those months Dean had been gone, and when he slowly stopped calling, she didn't try to press it.

But the day Bobby had called to tell her Dean had come back…nothing came close to what she had felt. Strangely, she'd felt like she'd come alive again; as if his death had taken apart of her soul with him. That was just stupid to think, however. Demons didn't have souls or soul mates.

Alice had risked blinking, not caring who saw, just to make sure that Bobby wasn't playing a cruel joke. Which, she should've known better. Those were the kind of heartless tricks Bobby would ever play.

Sure enough when she walked through the door she saw him.

Her heart instantly picking up speed as she remembered him turning around to face her with his hair still wet from the shower he'd just taken. His jaw had clenched before a small smile spread across his lips. He had attempted to speak to her but he had never got any of it out. She had flung herself on him so fast she'd startled him.

When his arms had wrapped around her, his hand running soothing circles along her back, did she realize that she was shaking as she sobbed wordlessly into his chest.

A demon… crying over a human.

Who would've thought? She laughed bitterly into her hands as she stared mindlessly forward.

Soon after Alice had been introduced to Castiel and for the life of her she could never understand why he had never ratted her out. Cas had never liked her or spoke of her fondly but he had trusted her. A few times he had threatened to smite her if she tried anything funny but that had been all. And after Colton had been born he seemed to lighten up towards her enough to where she didn't always wonder if he still hated her.

And now…now he was gone too just like Bobby.

Resting her head back on the bedroom wall she tried to slow the quivering of her shoulders, her hand clamped over her mouth, as she tried to stop the wailing that was building inside of her chest.

Everyone she had ever grown to care about was dying in front of her just like Lucifer had promised.

How long do you think Dean will love you when he finds out what you really are, hmmm? You can't possibly think he'd still love you, do you? I have always loved you, Alice, and yet, you just turn your back on me like I never meant anything to you.

Remember this Alice: I'm your real family. We are always permanent. Those boys? They will be dust long before you will ever be allowed to die.

Lucifer's threats left tortures what if's in the back of her mind. Alice only allowed herself to go there when she was too weak to fight them off making her feel like she could never save her family.

Dean had even mentioned in his last phone call how Sammy wasn't holding up too good. The dam that had been put in place by Death had been ruptured by Cas and no amount of research could be found to help him. Death never seemed to answer, even though she had promised Dean she wouldn't call on him.

She could even see it when Sam had walked in. His large shoulders hunched forward in defeat; looking like the only thing holding him upright was sheer willpower. The boy was exhausted and so was Dean.

It had taken no small amount of coaxing to try and get him to bed. At first, when his strong hands had gripped her hips tight, and pulled her towards him she'd wanted to fight him. To tell him what he needed was rest and not anything physical but all that had been washed away when his lips claimed hers, parting her lips with a forceful tongue she knew all too well, and moving himself to rest between her legs.

He wore himself out soon enough but sleep wouldn't claim her.

No easing of her conscience was possible tonight.

Their lives had been built around betrayals and secrets and as her legs wobbly lifted her off the floor she couldn't bear to bring herself to rest beside him.

She was Alice Winchester.

Demon.

Lucifer's Infiltrator.

Wife, lover, friend, and mother.

And the demon who killed John Winchester.

Hope you guys enjoyed!

Love to know what you guys thought of the prologue!

:)