"A rolling girl is always far away
In her dream world she longs to stay
So much noise buzzing round inside her head
All the worries never end, all the worries never end..."

~Drink the poison lightly~

Anxiety washed over her,

Smothering her like a cloud of smoke.

She could feel eyes on her, the unappreciative glances, and sharp glares.

Would they really accept her?

Surely not.

And did he really think she could be good?

No, he probably didn't.

But where would she go now?

Nowhere.

Because she was nothing, just like she'd always been told.

So when steel met skin, it came as no surprise when no one came to her aid.

A knife, pressed to her throat threateningly.

And no one cared, never sparing her a second glance.

Except him.

He'd been in the attackers place in a moment, holding him back and knocking him unconscious in a second.

And the look in his eyes?

It was one of pure terror and tenderness. Emotions she was not familiar with.

He paid attention to the angry red mark on her neck, and then the scars that lined her wrists.

He'd seemed so concerned.

But was he really concerned?

No, because no one could be concerned for her.

She was a failure.

But these unfamiliar emotions, why would they not cease?

She could feel her stomach twist each time he looked at her, and it felt as if a bird were caged in her chest each time he touched her.

There had been a moment when she'd considered that he might be 'the one', as they always portray him.

But that moment was short lived.

He'd introduced her to his uncle and aunt, and they'd been so nice.

Until the subject of her past came up.

She could sense it, the stress in the air tugged her chest in two different directions, inflating her fear and anxiety.

They looked at her with these strange looks.

Looks filled with contempt and sneers full of haughtiness.

But had she cracked?

No.

She'd just wallowed, allowing her eyes to water in frustration, but never letting them spill over.

Why wasn't she good enough for anyone?

Why did they all just sneer and mock her?

Maybe, just maybe, she should stop breathing.

"Are you okay? Yes it's okay..
You must be sick of all this, so let's go and
I will now stop myself from breathing."