I basically wanted an excuse to write about Avengers in a cupboard :) Enjoy!

Tony was more than happily sauntering along through the corridors of Stark Tower's executive floor, off to collect his wonderful girlfriend and drag her out for lunch, only to be accosted on the way and dragged into a cupboard by Agent Romanoff.

'Oi!' he exclaimed indignantly as she slapped her hand over his mouth and pushed him up against the wall so a mop dug painfully into his back.
Tony was both frightened and turned on at the same time, it was a surprisingly odd experience.

'I'm hiding from Coulson,' she hissed in his ear.

'Why are you doing it in a cupboard?' Tony asked through her hand. Except, of course, it came out as an incomprehensible mumble, so Natasha removed her hand and allowed him to repeat the question.

'I saw him coming this way,' she replied, trying to peak out through the slit in the door.

'Fun though it is being in a cupboard with you, I'm going for lunch with Pepper,' Tony said, trying to push past her only to get slammed back against the wall.
'Nat!' he argued, glaring at her.

'I'm saving you from a world of hurt here,' his teammate informed him, pointing a finger. 'Coulson wants to debrief us about the mission last Friday.'

'He's already done that!' Tony protested.

'Well apparently someone needs to work on their paperwork,' she said, raising an eyebrow.

'Pepper is the one with my balls in a vice,' Tony informed her. 'Coulson lost all right to them when he made the love of my life cry when I told her he was dead.'

'I'm sure he'll be sad to hear he no longer has possession of your balls,' Natasha nodded in agreement.

Tony's phone trilled and he pulled it out and thrust it in Natasha's face.

'Pepper wants to know where I am and now I have to tell her that I'm hiding in a cupboard with Black Widow!' He exclaimed.

'You don't HAVE to tell her you're in a cupboard,' Natasha protested.

'Oh please like I could lie to Pepper,' Tony told her, eyebrow raised as he typed out a response. 'She can always tell when I'm lying even on the phone!'

'She knows things,' Natasha agreed. 'By the way, I think Pepper may be pregnant.'

It was to this scene that Agent Coulson, accompanied by Pepper, walked in on barely a second later, two Avengers in a closet with Iron Man gawping at Black Widow looking shocked.

'Occupied,' Tony informed Coulson in Russian then grabbed Pepper and pulled her into the cupboard as well, ignoring her squeak and her protest of 'Tony!'

'Before you say something you might regret...' Natasha said, 'I totally lied about what I just told you, I heard Coulson coming and wanted to see what your reaction would be.'

'Not funny,' Tony informed her, tightening his hold on Pepper and glaring at his teammate.

'What's not funny?' Pepper asked, then to Natasha: 'what did you just tell him? He has a very minimal grasp on reality.'

'Pepper!' Tony protested.

Coulson knocked on the door and asked through the wood if they may consider coming out, to which all three occupants of said cupboard yelled out 'occupied!' in Russian.

'Why are you in a cupboard?' Pepper asked, totally un-phased by the whole situation, one of the many reasons the Avengers adore her.

'We WERE hiding from Coulson,' Tony said glaring at Natasha. 'But apparently I was dragged in here for no reason.'

'Team-bonding,' Natasha said.

'Is better done in a bar with drinks,' Tony shot back.

'Unless you're a recovering alcoholic.'

'I was never that bad!'

'You came close.'

'Oh please you've only known me for two years, barely.'

'And yet it feels like I've known you a lifetime.'

'CHILDREN,' Pepper intervened. 'That is enough, thank you.'

Both Avengers looked to the floor, suddenly looking rather sheepish.

'Agent Romanoff, have you finished with Tony?' Pepper asked.

'Yes, Ms Potts,' came the response.

'Good. I am going to lunch, stop hiding from Coulson.'

Natasha made a face at that one and Pepper exited the cupboard dragging Tony along with her, who shot a glare at Coulson on the way past.

'So can I debrief you later?' Coulson asked, only to realise that both Avengers and Ms Potts had vacated the floor and he was talking to himself.

'Even my team aren't this bad,' he muttered and stalked off down the corridor.