Oneshot for raevyn93~
Our Dance
"I'm going to kill him … kill him dead." Lovino hissed, watching his brother share the first married dance with his new husband, Ludwig. The song ended and the newlyweds shared a sickening kiss. And the crowds clapped and cheered as new music started, something more upbeat. People poured onto the huge dance floor and began moving.
"Lovi, please dance with me?" he heard an annoying voice broke through to his thoughts.
"No. Go away." he must have said for the hundredth time in the passed hour. He didn't want to dance with Antonio, nor did he want to 'go get punch' or 'talk' or anything else Antonio offered in between propositions of dancing.
"Now?" the Italian decided to ignore him and locate his brother again in the crowds.
Lovino watched in anger as his little brother was hanging off the potato with such a sickening lovesick look in his eyes. They kissed again and again and Lovino growled. He was going to slaughter Ludwig. He was going so castrate him and shove it down his throat before-
"Ve~ Lovi!" Lovino was ripped from his lovely day dream by his brother.
"What do you want, Feli?" the older brother growled, trying to be polite. He would rather be thinking of the thousands of ways to get away with murdering the potato-in-law.
Feliciano pulled his brother up from the chair and dragged him to the dance floor to dance, "I want to share a dance with my brother! Come on! Please? It's my big day and I want you to be happy!"
Lovino hugged his brother tightly as they began dancing, ignoring odd looks they got from some of the people, "I'll be happy when Ludwig dies."
The younger Italian began pouting, "Be nice, Lovi … Luddy is my husband now, and your brother … please try to like him more … oh! Better yet! Maybe you should settle down now! Find someone to love~" Feliciano ignored his brother digging his nails into his brother's shoulders, "Marriage to the same sex is legal here now, it that's what you're into~ I honestly don't know your preference too well … though I do have an inkling!"
"Just shut up, Feli, before I shove your face into your cake." he blushed darkly, wishing his brother would just shut up. Feliciano kissed his brother's cheeks, "I'm going to find Luddy~ you," he grabbed his brother's tux shirt and pushed him into someone, "go enjoy the night, too~" he ran off. Lovino wanted to strangle the brat, but first he needed to yell at the person holding him up.
"You okay?" Lovino looked up to the familiar voice. Antonio smiled. Antonio was an old college friend of the Italian's. They'd attended UCLA for a semester together. He'd become a close family friend, much to Lovino's chagrin.
"I'm fine, bastard." Lovino hissed, straightening himself up, "Stupid brother shoved me …"
Antonio laughed lightly, "Oh come on … don't be so hard on Feli … it's his wedding day~ he's just excited~!"
The Italian rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, "That's no excuse, besides … I can't stand that potato loving freak-in-law and I'd love to see Feli's day ruined if that man is gone."
"You're not even making much sense Lovi … just get your mind off of it and look," he pointed, "your brother has never been happier~ take a tip from him and just enjoy the day! This day marks the first of many happy ones in your brother's lifetime …"
Lovino rolled his eyes, but looked at how his brother smiled. Ludwig's smile was more reserved, but showed just how happy he was to be holding his husband in his arms.
"Come on, Lovi … dance with me now?" Antonio smiled.
"Hell no." Lovino growled, turning his attention to the Spanish man.
Antonio grabbed Lovino's arms and pulled Lovino to his chest. He placed his hand on the smaller man's waist and gripped his hand tightly, "Just relax, Lovi~ have some fun and get your mind of Feli and Ludwig and this day in general."
"Fine. Jerk …" Lovino waited for the next song to start but as it started up, he groaned. Of course it would be the slowest, sweetest song known to man. The song drifted around the many couples at the reception. Every one began dancing, wrapped up tightly against each other. Even the flower girl, Lily and the ring bearer, Vash, were dancing together. Antonio cooed over how cute the two children looked, with Vash being overprotective of the smaller girl.
"So cute!" he turned his head to meet Lovino's eyes. Those hazel eyes bore deeply into his own and he bit his lips remembering the first moment he met Lovino. It had been a gloriously horrible day.
Antonio looked around, confused. The map he'd been given wasn't helping much and he wasn't the best at reading English, yet, anyways.
"Um, excuse me?" he asked a passing person. She ignored him and walked on toward her boyfriend. He frowned and bit his lip. No one was helping him and he didn't know where his first class was.
He turned around and bumped into someone, both of their bags falling to the ground and books and paper scattering everywhere.
"Oh! I'm so sorry! I'll clean it!" Antonio shouted, trying desperately to pick up the pages and books before the person got angry.
However, he hadn't known the man he'd bumped into was always angry, "Stupid bastard! Watch where you're going!" Antonio looked up at the man before him, glad for the accent he heard.
"Your accent … where are you from?" the Spaniard asked, handing the man a sheet of paper he was holding.
"Italy, now just go fucking die in a pit of fire." he snatched up his books and stormed passed Antonio.
"Wait!" Antonio chased after him, "can you help me find this class room?" he held up a small piece of paper with the information on it.
The Italian looked at it and sighed, "I should leave you here, but I'm already on my way there … follow me, jerk."
Antonio smiled brightly, "Thank you! I'm Antonio, by the way, I moved here a month ago from Spain!"
"Who gives a shit?" he looked at the man and sighed, "Lovino."
Another twirl and Antonio bit his lips, squeezing Lovino closer. They were best friends after that, having most of the same classes and Antonio's major was Lovino's minor.
"Damn it, jerk. I'm a guy!" Lovino hissed, "Stop leading and let me lead! I'm not a damn woman!" he blushed.
He held Lovino close and smiled down at the blushing Italian, ignoring his pleas. They had been room mates after college, along with Feliciano. Antonio absolutely adored getting the friday movie nights with Lovino and Feliciano, but the nights were much more fun after Feli began dating Ludwig, staying out late, sometimes not even coming home at all. One night in particular stood out in Antonio's mind the most.
Feliciano had left an hour before, planing on staying at his boyfriend's flat. Antonio sat down on the couch, after having shoved the disk in the DVD player. He knew his best friend was in the kitchen making some popcorn for them.
"This movie better be worth it, jerk." Lovino plopped down on the couch beside Antonio and grabbed a handful of the buttered popcorn, popping a few kernels in his mouth.
"Of course~!" Antonio smiled brightly, hitting the play button.
Half way through the movie, Lovino seemed to have grown tired and had dozed of, leaning on Antonio's shoulder to sleep. Antonio smiled and let him sleep there all night.
"Don't squeeze so tightly, bastard!" Lovino hissed, blushing during another turn.
Antonio blushed as well and smiled, "Sorry~ I was just thinking about stuff."
"Well think happier thoughts, jerk … that hurt!"
"They are happy thoughts …" he whispered, remembering the best memory of all.
Lovino slammed the door behind him and tried his hardest to hold back the tears that were obviously threatening to fall. Antonio looked up and frowned as he slammed the door to his room behind him.
"Lovi?" Antonio asked, knocking on the door lightly.
"Go away, bastard!" his voice sounded strained, possibly from trying to sound like he wasn't crying when he was. Antonio felt his heart throb painfully, wanting nothing more than to break down the door and grab Lovino into his arms.
"Not until you tell me what's wrong!" the Spaniard countered sternly.
"You want to know?" the door swung open to reveal the red faced Italian, "You really want to fucking know?" he glared, pain filling his eyes, "No one will ever fucking like me! Oh no, not unless they're trying to get to Feliciano!" the Italian man yelled, "No one wants Lovino for Lovino! They just know he's close to his brother and they can get to Feli through him! I will never be able to fucking find someone to love me for me! Never!"
Antonio said nothing as he pulled Lovino into his arms and refused to let him go, "I care about you." he finally said after what seemed like hours, "I think you're far better than your little brother … yes, Feli is cute. Yes, he's talented with art, but no, he's not better than you. No, he can't sing as beautifully as you can. No, he could never take your place in my heart. Because …" he froze, just holding Lovino closely, 'because I love you …' he finished in his head, not having the courage to tell his good friend.
"What?" Lovino growled, suddenly pushing out of Antonio's arms as hard as he could. His face was bright red and his glare was cold.
Antonio looked confused until it dawned on him. In the midst of such a wonderful memory, of getting Lovino to open up to his comforting and problems and what not, he'd accidentally said aloud the secret he'd been holding for the passed two years. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. He could play it off like he hadn't said anything, but each passing second made that more and more impossible. Maybe if he told Lovino that he was imagining being in the arms of his crush. Well … while true, Lovino didn't take well to other people pretending he was some one he wasn't. That would only anger him further.
"What the fuck did you say, Antonio?" the man growled, his anger rising quickly at being ignored.
"I … I love you … I always have … I didn't mean to say it out lo-" Lovino turned away from him and stormed off, leaving a hurt and broken Antonio behind, alone in the midst of such cute and happy couples dancing the night away. Over the ending slow dance song, he could hear his heart shattering.
Lovino's mind raced. What the hell was that about? He wondered to himself. Antonio loved him? Yeah, right! It was probably something he'd slipped up saying while thinking of his real lover, someone he'd rather be dancing with rather than his ex-room mate.
This thought only burned Lovino in the heart. He hated everyone! He wished to see Antonio suffer for hurting him like that. Who did he think he was, spouting random bullshit like he loved Lovino like that? He wondered if Francis put him up to it, or perhaps Feliciano …
He glared at the possible culprits and sat down at a random table in the back of the room, not caring of the guests already sitting down. His mind now wondered how he could accommodate another body in his quest to kill and get away with it. Perhaps the ocean? That seemed good. Wasn't there a TV show about a guy who dumped his victims into the ocean?
"What's got your knickers in a twist?" he heard a voice beside him. Lovino turned to chew the person out and yell at them to mind their own business, but he stopped, seeing it was Arthur, a guy they'd known in college.
"Nothing." the Italian said curtly.
Arthur frowned and folded his arms over his chest, "I see, but just for conversation's sake, you can give me a proper bloody answer."
Lovino glared, "That tomato bastard … he said something that pissed me off. Now drop it before I drop you … off the edge of a four hundred foot cliff."
"A bit touchy, are we? Look you blasted Italian, I was just trying to be polite while my stupid American went to get us something to drink." the British man glared.
Hazel eyes men that sunny grass green … so unlike Antonio's deep emerald ones- … and they glared at each other for a moment before Lovino shrugged, "Yeah, a bit touchy. How would you feel if the man you thought was your best friend suddenly admits he's in love with you? I mean, how could that bastard even say something like that? I'd have slit his throat there if I hadn't been so mad!" Lovino began ranting, "Feliciano probably put him up to it! That, or he was thinking about some stupid slut he's sleeping with … he did say he was having good memories …"
Arthur raised his brow, his unusually large brow, and smirked, "What would I do? Well … for starters, I'd probably be shocked … deny it … then realise that after everything we'd been through, I'd know he meant it … then that stupid burger eating loon would realise I loved him, too and he'd finally make the proper first move … after he did, we'd both be happy …" his face heated up, "Hypothetically, of course!" he shouted.
"You speak like you've had experience …" Lovino frowned.
"No! Of course not! What kind of ma-"
"Iggy! I brought the tea you wanted!" a loud mouthed blonde scooted into the seat, unusually close to Arthur's, and set down the tea, "I made it just the way you like it!" Alfred kissed the Briton's cheek. Arthur blushed a deep red and glared, "Damn it, you wanker! Not in public!"
Lovino decided to leave the two sickening blondes behind, but Arthur's words stuck in his head well. Apparently, Alfred had blurted his feelings, leaving Arthur just as confused and angry.
The key difference, though, was that Arthur returned the feelings for Alfred … Lovino did not! … right? Sure, he liked the guy. He was tolerable and occasionally decent to be around, but he didn't love him! He couldn't!
Lovino turned back to see Arthur leaning against Alfred, seemingly happy beneath his annoyed scowl. The two reminded him of himself and Antonio … if … if Antonio had meant what he said about loving Lovino … then … did that mean …
The Italian blushed, leaning against a wall. He could fall in love with Antonio, if he allowed himself to … or perhaps … like in Arthur's case … he was already in love with him?
How did one determine if they were in love? With his brother, it seemed he was in love from moment one, already willing to do anything to please that German potato-in-law. Was that an indication? Would Lovino do anything to make Antonio happy?
Not all the time, no … but … most of the time, if Antonio was sad … his smiles were infectious and Lovino did know that he secretly loved Antonio's warm sunny smiles.
He looked back at Arthur and Alfred, the two down talking quietly to each other while enjoying their refreshments. People in love seemed to enjoy each other's company.
Lovino wouldn't admit it to the Spaniard, but he rather enjoyed spending a lot of time with him. He missed movie night and just hanging out.
The man blushed. That was already two for two … what else? Touchy-feely, right? Antonio already hugged Lovino all the time, especially when they saw each other after ages. Pet names … it was all a bit over whelming for Lovino …
Could he actually me in love with Antonio? He bit his lip and found his heart always sped up at the mere thought of seeing him. When the Spaniard touched his arms or hugged him, it sent Lovino's blood to his face to create the most embarrassing blushes.
"I'm in love with him … maybe …" he bit his lip, still unsure. What ever this was, maybe the source of the problem would know.
He pushed off the wall and decided he needed to confront Antonio about it. Lovino stormed through the dancing people, now that the song had picked up and was less romantic, it was much harder to slip through them without angering anyone … not that Lovino truly fucking cared. He shoved everyone here and there, receiving more than his share of glares and curses. However, he couldn't bring himself to care, nor turn to finish the fighting. He had to locate Antonio and ask him that question that was now echoing through his head.
Yet … when Lovino spotted the Spaniard, sitting in the window sill of the huge room, tears drying on his cheeks, those words faded and he just stood, watching him. Antonio bit his lip softly, looking rather guilty and upset. His tongue caressed the bite, only to do it all over again. He squeezed his legs to his chest tighter and gripped the sleeves of his button up shirt, since his blazer jacket was tossed aside.
More tears spilled onto the man's cheeks and he squeezed his eyes shut tightly, trying to hold back his sobs. Lovino slowly walked over to the window and sat down. He didn't know what to say, or what to do. Honestly, it made him feel guilty for what he saw. He tried to feign anger, somehow making Antonio the bad guy or maybe find a way to blame Antonio for everything … but he couldn't.
Was the man upset because of the way Lovino ran off, basically rejecting him … that is, if the confession was true!
Lovino's heart skipped a beat as Antonio mumbled something to himself.
"Stupid … stupid … stupid!" he chastised himself, "I shouldn't have slipped … now he hates me!" Antonio looked up and jumped, his face becoming red, "Lovi? I'm sorry … I didn't know anyone was sitting here! I'll just-"
"Dumbass," he grabbed Antonio's sleeve, pulling him back to sit, "I sat down long after you did. Seriously, were you dropped on your head?" he sighed, his own cheeks heating up.
"Oh … um …"
"Don't say a fucking word, bastard. I'm still … mad at you for saying what you did to me …" he saw Antonio visibly tense up with guilt, "but only if you didn't fucking mean it. I'm tired of people using me to get to Feliciano and I'm tired of Feliciano always trying to meddle in my life. I don't want pity love and I don't fucking want someone to pretend they love me just to appease that airhead!"
Silence fell over the two for a few moments and Antonio reached forward, pulling Lovino into his arms, "I'm sorry …" he muttered, holding Lovino tightly, "I can't change the way I feel … no one told me what to say and I'm not doing it for you or Feli … I'm not loving you for anyone … not even myself since it hurts so much to love someone so much and know they will never feel the same way.
"I love you because you are beautiful, both inside and out. Those late nights watching movies, those days of talking when you weren't feeling well or were upset are all precious to me. I would never lie about how much I love you and even if you want nothing more to do with me because of the way I'll feel, I'll let this hug be that last one I give you. Just let me have this moment and you'll never have to see me again."
Lovino let his eyes fall closed and he breathed in Antonio's scent. Antonio really did love him.
"Listen, jerk … I'm not sure what I feels like to be in love, nor do I think I want the stupid feeling, but …" he blushed darkly, "whatever I feel for you, love or annoyance … I know the eyebrows bastard is happy with his obnoxious, loud lover … so maybe I could be too …"
Antonio looked at Lovino with wide eyes, "Y-you mean it, Lovi?"
"Don't make me have to say anything, jerk." Lovino muttered softly, enjoying the warmth of Antonio's arms, "Like I said … that loud American confessed like you did … and they say they are happy …" Lovino sat back and looked at Antonio, "Turns out … eyebrows bastard loved him, too … so maybe … just maybe, bastard … this feeling I feel is … l-love …" he looked away. Antonio smiled and pulled Lovino tightly against his chest.
"I love you so much, Lovi~" he kissed his cheek sweetly, but Lovino frowned, "If we're together now, you have to fucking kiss me right, jerk." he glued their lips together in an awkward first kiss.
The Spaniard grinned into the kiss and tilted his head to deepen the kiss and pull Lovino closer. Loud cheering broke the two apart and Lovino's face lit up like a beacon when he saw his brother had spotted them and initiated cheering.
"To the new couple and the newly weds!" Gilbert, Antonio's best friend and Ludwig's best man rose onto a table with his glass of champagne.
"To the couples!" the rest of the room cheered.
Lovino buried his face into Antonio's chest and Antonio smiled, rubbing his back as the rest of the room returned to their dancing and eating.
"Want to get out of here, bastard?" Lovino asked, his annoyance clear and obvious.
Antonio laughed lightly, "Sure … anything for you~" he pulled Lovino up to stand, "How about a movie night?"
"I'd like that, bas-Antonio … but the movie better not suck, or I'll have to kick your ass." their fingers laced together and they bid good bye to Feliciano before heading back to Lovino's apartment for their movie night.
I hope you enjoyed~
~Lady Pyrien