A/N: 'Ello all! Here's another little one-shot that you might enjoy.

And before you poke my eyes out with sporks and pour salt in my empty eye sockets, yes, I am working on the revamped 'A Vampire's Lullaby' (And I just got an idea for how I'm going to kill off Sakura… =) Just not in this story.)

Warnings: Yaoi (boyxbox), hard lemon (Viewer discretion is advised), bad language, crack humor, Bitchy!Sakura(What else is new?), crack humor, and maybe more.

Pairings: SasuNaru

Disclaimer: No…. Just no… -sniffle-

Sasuke sat at his desk, wanting nothing more then to start banging his forehead on it.

Why? One word.

Fangirls.

Honestly. Couldn't they find another hot, super rich guy to stalk?

The voice of one Haruno Sakura pulled him from his little reprieve. "Sasuke, if you don't marry me I swear…!"

"Sakura, if you don't get out of my sight right this moment I swear I will fire you." Sasuke snapped.

Sakura stuttered, tears in her eyes as she walked out of his office.

"And send Naruto in after you!" He called to her retreating form.

He really needed to blow off some steam.

A small smile formed on his lips as he watched his blonde enter the office. "Yes, Uchiha-sama?" The blonde secretary murmured.

"Lock the door, then come here." Sasuke instructed, a predatory gleam in his coal-colored eyes.

Naruto huffed, cute secretary mask dropped, and put his hands on his hips. "Teme, I need to go back to work. Can't you wait until we get home?"

"Hn. Just do as you are told, Dobe." Sasuke replied.

Naruto locked the door and prowled toward Sasuke, slowly undoing the buttons on his shirt. "Might I remind you, S'uke, that Uchiha Corp. is one of the biggest, richest companies in the world. Every minute we slack off, we lose money. If we keep doing this, next thing you know you will be living on the street, in a cardboard box, having to sell your body to your fangirls just to get by, and- mmh!"

The poor blonde didn't get to finish his rant as he was slammed back onto Sasuke's hard desk, mouth being attacked by the raven's and feverish hands quickly ridding him of his clothes.

"Mmm. It's so hot when you try to sound smart, Dobe." Sasuke groaned before returning to the blonde's mouth, probing it with his tongue. His hands slowly moved to Naruto's chest, pinching and teasing his perked nipples.

The little blonde squirmed and whimpered under the Uchiha, rant long forgotten in favor of mindblowing pleasure.

Sasuke began reaching to his drawer where h kept his stash of flavored lube, then thought better of it and pulled the blonde off his desk and pushed him to his knees. "Suck me off, Dobe." He commanded, voice thick with arousal and lust.

Naruto made quick work of Sasuke's pants before gripping the engorged cock that now hung in his face. He gave the tip an experimental lick and smirked when the raven above him gave a low moan.

He gave it a few more licks before taking the tip into his mouth and running his tongue over the slit. Taking more into his mouth he tongued the throbbing vein and hollowed out his cheeks, sucking hard.

Sasuke growled, pulling the blonde's hair hard before cumming.

Naruto swallowed as much as he could before looking up at Sasuke, cum dribbling down his chin.

The raven pulled the little fox up and slammed him back down on the desk before leaning over him and licking his cum off Naruto's face. He shivered at the taste and reclaimed the blonde's mouth, tasting more of himself on Naruto's tongue.

"Mmm. S'uke.. Please… More…" Came the little blonde's wanton moan.

Sasuke smirked into the other's mouth as he reached into the drawer of his desk and pulled out his tomato-flavored lube. He slicked up his fingers with it before putting two into the blonde's tight little hole and began to stretch him.

Naruto hissed in pain as a third finger entered, then screamed in pleasure as thos teasing fingers stabbed at his prostate. "Aah! Mmmm. Quit- ah!- teasing!" He moaned out.

Sasuke removed his fingers- smirking when the blonde whined in protest- and quickly coated his hard prick before entering Naruto with one strong thrust.

The smaller male screamed as his prostate was rammed. "Ah! More! Sasuke!"

Sasuke sped up his thrusts until the blonde was a moaning, screaming pile of pleasurable goo. "Ah. Naru…to…" He moaned quietly, licking the shell of Naruto's ear before biting it softly.

"Ah! Sasuke I'm- Aaah!" Naruto's screams got louder as he came violently, Sasuke following not far behind as the blonde's walls clamped down on him.

Sasuke slid out before falling back into his chair to catch his breath. "Oh, Kami that was good." He murmured, getting up and walking to the bathroom of his office. He returned a moment later, cleaned and bearing a wet towel to clean the other off with.

Once they were presentable, the duo walked out of the office.. Only to freeze.

'Fuck. I forgot that the other representatives from the company were coming today…' Sasuke thought, looking over the assembled group.

Tsunade, Faguku, Makoto, Itachi, Kakashi, Iruka, Haku, and Orochimaru were all there.

Faguku looked scandalized, Itachi was smirking evilly, Orochimaru was blushing, and everyone else had passed out from nosebleeds.

Naruto turned bright red before hiding behind Sasuke. "Never again." He murmured, hiding his face in the back of the other's shirt.

Sasuke nodded slowly before realizing something. "Where's Jiraiya?" He asked.

Orochimaru cracked up laughing before Itachi replied with. "He said something about a new story idea and took off. Kukuku."

A/N: And there you have it. So what did you think? Did you hate it? Die from a nosebleed? Laugh your ass off? Review and tell me!

See you all soon!

Ja ne

Shayde-Sensei