A/N: And here we are at the end. Thank you to everyone who has been following this story, despite the sometimes very long breaks between chapters. This has been a year-long labor of love for what should have been a beautiful romance. I hope I've done it justice. Please let me know what you think of it!

When I wake, I hear and feel my surroundings before I am able to see. Machines emit a faint, familiar hum. Oxygen flows into my mask with a hiss, feeding my thin and labored breathing. My chest feels compressed, each breath burning in my lungs. I feel bandages binding my abdomen, covering the wound that pulses with dull pain. Opening my eyes is a struggle. My eyelids flutter before opening, and the pale light makes my eyes ache.

"Father?"

I turn my head towards my son's voice; my vision takes a moment to focus. I lie in my hospital bed, tubes connecting me to life-saving machines. Kolyat sits beside me and peers at my face with an expression filled with sorrow. "Kolyat…" I say. My voice is strained, rough.

"How do you feel?"

Not well, if I am to be truthful. "Weak," I reply. "What has happened?"

Kolyat settles back in his chair, resting his hand on my arm. "You had to have surgery to repair your injury. You lost a lot of blood." He pulls up the sleeve of his jacket. There is a bandage on his arm. "There wasn't enough drell blood, so I donated some of mine."

"Thank you."

He gives a short nod. "Of course, Father." He attempts to smile, but I can see his heart is not in it.

"Kolyat. The prognosis…" I cough several times. Pain ripples through my chest, my stomach. "The prognosis isn't good, I take it."

He shakes his head. "No. The Citadel was in chaos. The hospital could not send anyone until C-Sec was able to give them the all-clear. The blood I gave… It wasn't enough, and the other drell on the station are so scattered." He swallows a few times before continuing. His voice is soft and small when he speaks. "The doctors say… They say that because of the severe blood loss, and because your lungs are over-taxed from all the running and fighting today… Your lungs aren't getting enough oxygen. And… they cannot recover, Father. The disease has progressed." He sighs before continuing, his voice breaking. "There's nothing more they can do. It… it will be soon."

I hold my arms out to him. There is only a moment of hesitation before he stands and leans over the bed so I can embrace him. I hold him for a time – longer than I ever have in over a decade. I find I am still afraid of what lies ahead, but my fear is now more for Kolyat than it is for me. I am leaving him in the midst of a terrible war, where the stakes are not honor or glory or power, but survival. I will cross the sea and find rest there. I fear he is soon to follow.

I release him after a time, the position awkward and difficult to maintain. Kolyat straightens, taking a deep breath. "I… I wanted to be the one to tell you," Kolyat says, his voice still hoarse. His cheeks are wet with tears I did not see him shed. My hospital gown is damp at the shoulder. "I figured you've had enough of doctors."

I give him a small smile. "I have. Thank you." A fresh bout of coughing takes me. It seems to go on interminably, until finally it begins to calm. The look on my son's face is heartbreaking, and I will my breath to steady itself, if only to ease his suffering.

"Are you in a lot of pain?" he asks, his voice small. "Should I get a nurse? Maybe they can give you something."

I shake my head. The movement makes me dizzy. "No, anything… anything they give me will make me sleep." I take his hand and squeeze it gently. "If these are to be my final moments, I wish to face them with my eyes open."

He nods and sits back into his chair, our hands still linked.

"Kolyat, listen…" I take a few breaths, as deep as I can make them, in hopes I will have enough breath for what I have to say. "I have… written you a letter. I recorded a vid as well. You will find them in my files. But it is vital… that you hear some of the words in person."

I cough again, though it is not so severe. "I have not been a good father to you. Perhaps… perhaps I never have been. I have left you… in the care of others far too often. You deserved more than what I have given you."

Kolyat shakes his head, but says nothing.

"I have many regrets, Kolyat. I should have… been there for you, for your mother. Despite it all… you have grown into an exceptional person. I have had little part… in raising you to be the person you are now." I smile, my heart swelling with feeling for him. "Still, I am so proud."

He does not speak; I do not think he can. Instead, he lays his head against my shoulder. We remain like this for a long time. I lie awake, relishing this rare and final moment of closeness with my son. He is so still that I wonder whether he has fallen asleep, until I hear him whisper. "I forgive you, Father."

I close my eyes, thanking the gods for this moment. Worried that I might fall asleep if my eyes are closed too long, I open them and rest my head against his.

ooo

I do not know how much time has passed – an hour, or perhaps two – when I hear shouting coming from the corridor. The tirade grows louder with each passing second. It sounds panicked and scared more than truly angry. I do not understand the words, but I know the voice. "Siha…"

Kolyat lifts his head from my shoulder and looks out through the glass door behind him. "Yes, it's her. She's yelling at one of the doctors." He turns back to me and frowns. "I think they're breaking the news to her," he says in a low tone.

"Please bring her in," I say. I worry for the doctor. Biotics can become unstable when emotions run high, and I do not want Siha to do something she might regret.

Kolyat leaves the room. I watch him walk toward the end of the corridor, but lose sight of him once he moves past the glass. Minutes pass. Finally, he returns with Siha close behind him.

"Thane…" She is at my side in an instant.

"Siha," I greet her. "I'm afraid I've picked a bad time to leave."

She bends so our heads are close. She takes my hand, caressing it in slow, even strokes. Her hands are warm to the touch, soothing to my cold skin. "You couldn't disappoint me, Thane. Not even now."

"Such pleasant things from your lips." Another fit of coughing takes me. When it ends, I must take a gasping breath before I am able to speak. "Excuse me. Breathing is difficult."

"It's all right," she says, taking a seat beside me. "Do you need anything?"

I give a slight shake of my head; I cannot manage more than that. "No. I have all I need now." More coughing, more gasping breaths. "But tell me. The Council… did they survive?"

It is Kolyat who answers. "Yes, Father. Three are alive, thanks to you and Shepard. Udina… he instigated it. He is dead." He says the last sentence with a note of satisfaction.

"That assassin should be embarrassed," I say in a similar tone. "A terminally ill drell managed to stop him from reaching his target."

"You did more than that." Siha smiles, but I can see that it is forced. "I hear you really kicked his ass."

I manage a smile of my own. "Perhaps a little."

A heavy silence falls over us. After a moment, Kolyat touches my arm. "Maybe you and Shepard would like a moment alone?"

"Yes, thank you, Kolyat."

Siha nods. "Yeah, thanks. I'll come get you if he starts to get worse."

"I'll be right outside," he says. He darkens the glass, making it opaque to give us some privacy, then leaves.

Neither Siha nor I say anything at first. In truth, I do not know where to begin.

She glances at the small bedside table. The half-empty tin of tea sits beside my used cup from this morning, what seems a lifetime ago. "You didn't finish your tea," she says softly.

Tears pour from her eyes all at once, and she bites back a sob. She turns her face away, wiping at her eyes furiously with the heel of her hand. "Shit. Of all things to make me cry…"

"Siha…" I reach up, pulling her back to face me. "You needn't… hide from me." It occurs to me that I have never seen her cry. Her emotions, usually so well-guarded, are raw and naked on her face. She is so beautiful. Perhaps one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. How strange that – even now, when I am so close to the end – there can still be new things, first things. We are still forming new memories together. I brush tears from her cheeks with my thumb. I begin coughing again, but do not remove my hand.

She covers my hand with one of hers, pressing into the touch. "I thought I was ready," she says through her ever-flowing tears. "I thought I was prepared. You told me you were dying. I knew it was going to happen. But I'm so stupid. How could I prepare for this? How could I ever be ready for this? Somewhere in the back of my mind, I always thought we'd have more time."

I pull her closer until our foreheads touch. "Then… we are fools together," I tell her. "For I… I thought the same."

"I love you, Thane," she says in a fierce whisper. "My memory may not be like yours, but I could never forget you. Not ever."

"And… I love you, my siha." I lower my oxygen mask and kiss her, as long and as deeply as I dare. When our lips part, my breath is thin and reedy. I struggle to keep from coughing, but I cannot control the spasm that ripples through my chest. "You have… gifted me with so many… fond memories," I say when I have caught a bit of breath. "Thank you."

She kisses my cheeks, her hands caressing the ridges as if to memorize them. Her tears spill onto my skin. A flash of memory flickers across my vision for just a moment. It rains. It always rains on Kahje. When she straightens, her crying has at last seemed to have found its end.

"Siha, I have one final thing… to ask of you," I say.

She nods. "Kolyat?"

"Yes," I agree. Still more coughing. "Please… look after him. He has no one now."

She nods again. Her eyes turn steely, resolute. "I will, I promise. No matter what happens, I will protect him, Thane."

I kiss her hand. It seems that I will be giving him over to another's care for the last time. "Thank you."

Another fit of coughing takes me, longer than the last. When it finally ends, I am shaking and lightheaded. Siha tries to put the oxygen mask back on, but I shake my head. "No, leave it off. It won't… it won't be long now. Please call… for Kolyat."

Siha lets go of my hands slowly, reluctant to pull away. She opens the door and wordlessly motions for my son to come inside. When they are both at my bedside, I take one of their hands in each of mine.

"There is something I must do before it gets worse. I must…" I gasp for breath, abandoning the sentence. I give a short nod to Kolyat; I had arranged with him the prayers I wished to be said upon my passing. I wait until my breath steadies before I begin, closing my eyes. "Kalahira, Mistress of Inscrutable Depths, I ask forgiveness. Kalahira, whose waves wear down stone and sand –" I cannot continue. Try as I might to control the coughs, they keep coming.

"Kalahira," Kolyat continues, "wash the sins from this one and set him on the distant shore of the infinite spirit."

I open my eyes in surprise and smile. His tone, his cadence… He does not read from a book, but recites from memory. "Kolyat… You speak as the priests do. You have been spending time with them."

Kolyat gives a slight nod, his face grave. His folded hands tremble. He pulls a book from his pocket, and goes to stand closer to Siha. "I brought a prayer book," he says to her. "Shepard, would you care to join me?"

Siha says nothing, but leans to read from the book.

My eyes feel heavy. My limbs as well. It is strange how calm my breathing has become, and so suddenly.

"Kalahira…" I hear Kolyat's voice, but no longer see his face. My eyes are open, but cannot focus. I cannot see Siha either. They are lost in an ocean fog. "This one's heart is pure, but beset with wickedness and contention."

Siha's voice takes up the prayer. "Guide this one to where the traveler never tires, the lover never leaves, the hungry never starve."

As she speaks, her voice begins to fade. The sound of waves rises in a crescendo, until Siha's voice is little more than a whisper in the wind.

"Guide this one, Kalahira, and she will be a companion to you as she was to me."

I slip beneath the water's surface. The roar of the waves consumes me. I am weightless, carried ever forward by the tide. A distant shore calls for me beyond the light of a rising sun.

I carry nothing but my memories – a stream of people and voices and emotions that flit past my vision a thousand times over. A thousand times I live, begging forgiveness at Irikah's feet, weeping with joy at Kolyat's birth, numb with rage and helplessness at my wife's death. Innumerable lifetimes pass, where I fall into despair, only to be pulled back up by Siha's boundless devotion.

I am weightless, driftwood carried to familiar sands. Contentment washes over me; I am finally able to rest. There is much that awaits me in the land beyond, but here I remain for now.

I wait, until she too becomes weightless. One day, the waves will surely carry her back to me. And when that day comes, I will be here to welcome her home.

~end~