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Chapter One Rolling in the Deep

The agents had just returned from a grueling four day artifact hunt that ended dismally unresolved. It was supposed to be a quick snag and bag but planes were delayed, car rentals weren't ready and phone chargers were lost. It messed up their schedule and the contact point wasn't met. No one was to blame but Artie wasn't happy because the artifact was well on its way to Canada and they had no idea where. They had to come back home and wait for a ping. It was rare that Myka Bering did not get her artifact and she was especially upset. She thought that if you planned ahead, anything could be a compensated for. But her fool proof plans were fooled when the domino effect took place. It seemed the agents couldn't catch a break in the case. Pete chalked it up to the events that caused the delays. Claudia was frustrated being back at the Warehouse but continued to monitor the computer for possible activities. It was the one benefit to being stuck there. Helena had accompanied Myka and Pete and took the back seat in the case as she as still learning the ropes in her reentry to the Warehouse. She was learning as much about her fellow agents as she was about how things were done. She could tell the difference among them; Artie's black and white approach versus Pete's go with the flow attitude. And there in the middle was Myka; also not happy with the result but taking more of the blame onto herself. That intrigued the Brit.

The car ride back from the airport was quiet. Artie knew Myka was already beating herself up inside. He wished Pete and Helena would be half as upset as Myka. He knew they cared but he was frustrated and wanted results. Pete just wanted a hot shower and food. He was getting really cranky having missed his only opportunity for cheese fries at the airport. Helena was quiet because her mind was elsewhere. No one was in the mood for what greeted when they got to the B&B.

"Eh, Artie…," Leena said hesitantly as the group made their way into the mail hallway.
"There are two IRS Agents in the dining room."

"Someone forget to pay their taxes?" he asked looking at the group but it was actually his attempt at a joke.

"Maybe they heard about us using their line of work to explain the Warehouse," Pete said.

"They want to see Helena," Leena said and everyone turned to the Brit.

"There must be some mistake," HG said.

"Yeah, well we've hit nothing but mistakes," Artie said revealing his true thoughts about the retrieval ordeal. Myka tuned right into his words and she was the only one they really bothered.

"Well, let's see what they want with you," Artie said and HG didn't care for his tone – as if she was already guilty of something.

The two men stood up as soon as Artie and HG entered the room. They introduced themselves as Agents Mallory and Keane. They apologized for coming but said that their letters and phone calls had been ignored. Artie looked at Helena but she looked surprised to hear that.

"We've sent out several letters, some of them registered to Ms. Wells so we know they arrived," Agent Mallory said and produced the signed receipts. There was Leena's signature on many of them.

"What exactly is this about?" Artie asked.

"Well, it would seem Ms. Wells has not responded to our inquiries into her estate. She has not filed the necessary papers on her estate since becoming a citizen," he explained.

As part of her reentry to the Warehouse, the Regents took care of setting up HG with dual citizenship and the people who were in charge of her estate had been contacted since her rejoining. Now that everything was over here with her, Uncle Sam was calling.

Artie knew the Brit had paid her fair share of taxes because someone had been sent to set her up on everything. Becoming a citizen is one thing; becoming a dual one in another century is quite another.

"There must be some misunderstanding. Agent Wells has been assisted in all of her tax returns due to her dual citizenship," Artie said coming to her rescue.

"Oh, it is not her personal taxes, Agent Nielsen. It's her foundation. There are certain forms you need to complete in addition to your own taxes, sir when you head up a charitable foundation," the IRS agent explained.

"A what?" HG asked not quite sure what he was talking about.

"The HG Wells Charitable Foundation, ma'am," Agent Keane explained but noted the look of surprise on Helena's face.

"Ma'am…," the young agent started but Helena had heard enough.

"It's Agent Wells, sir," she informed him curtly.

"I'm sorry, Agent Wells there are certain forms that need to be completed for your …. wait … you're an agent with your own foundation?" he couldn't help but ask.

"It's complicated," Artie said nervously not wanting to divulge too much information. "Tell you what, why don't you leave the papers here and we'll have Agent Wells complete them," he suggested.

"Agent Nielsen, this would be the fifth time we're providing those forms to Ms.…. I mean Agent Wells. Can you assure us that the forms will be completed this time?" Agent Keane asked.

Artie turned to look at his charge. "I can guarantee you both that Agent Wells will not do anything but complete those forms," Artie said to them but looked directly at HG.

The two IRS agents hesitated and Artie took this to mean that they were probably told to come back with the forms or someone in handcuffs.

"I'd be willing to call your supervisor if you think this is an issue," Artie offered and both declined.

"We can give Agent Wells some time. We'll come back in a couple of days. If you have any questions, Agent Wells..," Agent Mallory said handing her his card.

"I'm sure I will have none," Helena said taking the card and shoving in her back pocket.

"Well, ok then. Here are the forms," the other IRS agent said and dropped the heavy packet onto the table. Its weight made a loud noise.

Artie looked at the size of the packet. "Fifth time you're giving her these, eh?" he asked because he couldn't wait to find out where the other four deliveries were.

"Yes sir," Mallory confirmed.

"Believe me, sir. We don't like to make these visits to fellow agents if we can avoid it but this time, we had no choice," Keane said letting Artie know he was giving HG the maximum amount of professional courtesy that they could.

"I am sure of that," Artie said looked again at HG who didn't quite grasp the severity of the visit.

They walked the agents out and Artie thanked them for coming. HG was polite but didn't. She did know that as soon as they left, she would have to answer where the other four deliveries were.

"Now where did I put those forms?" she asked as if really concerned before Artie had a chance.

"You threw them in the closet," Pete said because he was there each time she tossed the special delivery packages into the hallway closet and Helena cringed.

Artie opened the hallway closet and there on the floor were in fact the four packages. On top of them were six registered letters all from the IRS. Artie took them out.

"Did you think they were fans?" he asked but the phrase was lost on HG.

"Let me take a look at them, " Myka offered because she picked up on the tension before anyone did.

"Agent Wells, what exactly is this foundation?" Artie asked.

"Well, I would imagine it's the foundation I left instructions for before joining Warehouse 12. I wanted some of my estate to go to fund causes. I had no idea if there would be money in the foundation because I wasn't quite sure about residuals from the books. And of course, I never gave thought to movie rights," HG said.

"Well, perhaps we could have someone take a look at it for you," Artie said since he did not want an IRS issue with any of his agents.

Myka took one look at the papers in the envelope and knew it was complicated. "Helena, it says that they are sending you checks on a monthly basis. Have you been receiving them?"

"Yes and then I give them away," HG said.

"You what?" Pete asked wondering what that meant.

"She gives the money away," Claudia said.

"How do you know this?" Artie said.

"Well, I've seen her give the cash out to people," Claudia said proud of her friend's generosity.

"What?" Artie asked knowing this was a problem on so many levels.

"She hands cash out to those in need," Claudia said a little slower.

Myka looked curiously at her partner. She had been out with Helena when she would stop if there were people asking for money or if there were fund raising tables. She had noticed the looks of surprise on the face of some people. But she always stood back, giving Helena her privacy. Now Myka looked down at the papers with the monthly amounts.

"HG, how much do you give to out?" Pete asked.

"Well,…" HG started to answer but wasn't quite sure of the number.

"She's literally opened her wallet and emptied it!" Claudia attested to. She was really taken with HG's kindness. That wasn't the word Artie was thinking of.

"Agent Wells am I to understand that you simply hand over fistfuls of cash to the locals?" he asked cringing at what the answer might be.

"No, don't be ridiculous Artie," HG said and he breathed a sigh of relief.

"Why would I make a fist? Then they couldn't take the money," she asked confused by the expression.

"Oh God, please tell me all of Univille does not know that you're handing out money on the streets?" Artie asked.

"No, sometimes she buys things," Claudia offered not getting what the big deal was.

"We are supposed to be keeping a low profile, remember that?" Artie asked but this was the first time HG remembered that.

"Where exactly was that in the manual?" HG asked sincerely. She had read the manuals but mostly because Myka was the one Artie put in charge of that. So Myka would quiz her on the contents. She never enjoyed testing as much as she did when Myka was the one asking the questions.

"No, Agent Wells it's not in the manual. It's what I say at almost all of my meetings," Artie said and then HG understood why she didn't remember it. She was selective in her listening especially at Artie's meetings.

"Alright, Myka if you could look over these papers with HG and see what you think is involved. I'll ask Mrs. Frederic if we have someone on staff that could assist us. In the meantime Agent Wells, no more doling out money! We do not want to make a spectacle of ourselves or raise any suspicion," Artie said.

Pete looked over at the papers since no one said he couldn't. His eyes popped open and his eyebrows were raised. "Holy moly, HG - $15,000 a month? You're rolling in it deep, aren't you?" he said without thinking.

Myka poked him but it was too late. She could see the blush on Helena's face. The very over confident Brit seemed to be uncomfortable with all of this.

"Agent Wells, we do not want to cause a lot of attention to our operation, is that understood?" Artie asked.

"Yes Artie," HG said.

"The last thing we need is for the people of Univille to think we're running a charity group out of the B&B," he added.

"Of course," HG agreed.

Just then the doorbell rang and Artie opened the door. He looked down at the group of young girls on the porch. They were dressed in similar uniforms.

"Mom, they're home!" cried one of the girls to the woman standing by the white SUV.

"Can I help you?" Artie asked wondering what the group was doing there.

"We're here with your cookies," one of them answered and now Artie saw what the uniforms were.

"I think there's some mistake. We didn't order any ….," Artie attempted but the girls were scattering except for the littlest among them. Artie stood there unsure of what to do but wanted to explain they had made a mistake. He finally bent down to the young Girl Scout.

"Please tell your mother that we didn't buy any cookies," he said to her but she just looked up at him. In some ways, it was the same look he got from HG when he talked to her.

The mother opened the back of the van and took out a carton of cookies. Now everyone was at the door waiting to see what was going on. Everyone except HG.

"Oh my God, Girl Scout cookies? Artie, can we keep them, please? Maybe Mrs. Frederic bought them for us. Thin mints? Are there Thin Mints?" Pete asked in anticipation of devouring one of his favorite snacks. He rushed down the stairs and helped the mother carry the carton up.

"Hi, is this the residence of Helena Wells?" the mother asked out of breath. The five troop members were gathered around her.

"Yes it is!" Pete said.

"Excuse me, madam. I believe there is some mistake. I don't think we ordered these cookies," Artie said and then turned to Myka and instructed her to 'get HG immediately!'.

Myka went back into the hallway where HG was pacing. "Helena? Did you order these cookies?" Myka asked and already knew the answer.

"Not really. But I did give those girls some money and they insisted that I get some cookies for the money and I didn't want them but they said I had to so I told them one box, I would take one box ….," HG said out of breath.

"It's OK, Helena. It's just a carton of cookies. Pete will eat them. That was very nice of you. Let's go thank them for bringing them out," Myka said and HG noticed how calming Myka made everything. Helena followed Myka out to the porch.

"Oh here, Ms. Wells," Artie said not wanting to use official titles. "I was just telling everyone how nice it was that they drove – all-the-way-to-the-B&B - to give you your carton of cookies," Artie said emphasizing the part he was most upset about.

"Yes thank you," Helena said smiling at the young girls. "You shouldn't have gone to so much trouble."

"No trouble at all, Ms. Wells, the Scout Leader said.

And with that the mother waived down the driveway. Only then did the agents notice that she had not come alone. Driving up the driveway was a large van.

"Wait, what is that?" Artie asked.

"That's the rest of her cookies," said one of the young girls.

Pete put the carton down on the porch and went down to help the mother with the second carton. Artie heard the back of the van open.

"Agent Wells!" he said forgetting that he didn't want titles. "Could you please tell me just how many boxes of cookies you ordered?"

Myka made sure to stand right next to HG. "Well, Artie I cannot be certain because I didn't actually order any…," she tried.

The mother was on the steps now. "OK, so at three dollars and fifty cents a box, your total order comes to one thousand boxes," she said looking down at the paper.

"We sold the most in the whole county!" one of the decorated Girl Scouts yelled.

"Did you?" asked Artie as he turned to look at HG. "Didn't order any?" he growled.

"Well, technically Ms. Wells is correct," the mother said. "She just plunked down the money on the table and we did the rest. I mean, it's not every day when someone makes a three thousand five hundred dollar donation!" the woman added.

The driver of the van had placed several cartons on a hand cart and was pushing them to the porch.

"Oh yes! Samoas, Savannah Smiles. Shortbread. Peanut Butter Tagalongs. Do-Si-Dos! Dulce De Leche," Pete said as he rubbed the boxes and almost salivated.

"Madam, please! We cannot accept all these cookies!" Artie pleaded but it was to no avail.

The donation had been made and so the cookies had to be delivered. Stack after stack was hauled to the porch until fifty cartons were arranged in rows. Artie held his tongue but only because there were five young Girl Scouts there. He could not wait for the troop to get back in their SUV.

Helena had no idea what to do. She had given them the money but partly out of desperation. It was almost the end of the month and she had not distributed all of the money from the foundation. So she took what was left after leaving some in a church and bus station and gave it to the young girls seated at the table outside the diner in Univille. She wanted to just leave but one of the scouts apprehended her and insisted that she fill out an order form. Helena did not want to cause a commotion so she told the girl to fill out whatever she liked. Then they insisted Helena give them her address. Again, she did so reluctantly but only so she wouldn't cause a scene.

"They can be very pushy," she said to Myka trying to explain what happened.

"HG, you let a group of Girl Scouts push you around?" Claudia asked incredulously.

"I had gone to town with Artie that day and he was due back any minute," HG explained.

"Well, there you go Ms. Wells. All of your cookies. What do we say girls?" the mother prompted and in unison the five girls shouted, "Thank you Miss Wells for buying our Girl Scout cookies!"

With that, the five reasons Artie wasn't already ripping into HG left and got in their car. Everyone waved to the little fingers that were waving to them out the windows. Through the fake smile on Artie's face came the warning.

"Agent Wells, I want to see you inside immediately!" he said not softening the broad smile as he waved.

He walked back into the hallway and HG and Myka followed.

"Artie, please remember that this was done out of charity," Myka said and drew his stare.

"Yeah, don't be so grumpy, Artie," Claudia said. "No one gets cranky over Girl Scout cookies," she reminded him.

Their words did soften him a bit. But mostly because he had enough for one day. He wanted to go home and forget about all of this.

"I can't wait to hear what solution you come up with for all those cookies tomorrow morning, Agent Wells," he said.

"We'll just let Pete eat them," Claudia offered because he was still out on the porch fawning over the different kinds of cookies. "Sa-mo-as" they could hear him saying with great affection.

"Get rid of them!" Artie barked before he left and then had to make his way past the boxes to get to the steps.

"We are set for life!" Pete announced when he came back in.

"Pete, I don't think the shelf life of cookies is a lifetime so we need to come up with an alternate solution," Myka said already trying to address Helena's problem.

"We'll eat fast. Three meals a day, plus three snacks times seven days times fifty two weeks. HG, what's that number?" he said.

"Two thousand one hundred and eight four," HG answered.

"Times four cookies each time?" he asked.

"Eight thousand, seven hundred and thirty six," the math brain answered.

"See? And that's per person!" Pete declared as if this was the complete solution. "You worry too much, Mykes."

But while HG and Claudia gave pause to his impractical solution, Myka stared out at the porch. She knew the bigger issue was that now the town would be abuzz with talk about the one thousand cartons delivered to the B&B. She grew up in a small town – and small talk was the lifeblood of its residents. This was not going to go unnoticed. It was only a matter of time before rumors started.

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