Now this is my first ever FF so go easy on me, and please review. It is set during season 2 episode 15: Origins. It picks up from where Nikita is trying to get Carla to put down the tablet...

"Carla, what are you doing?" asked a nervous Nikita walking closer to Carla. "Something I should have done a long time ago. I'm going to destroy Amanda" Carla's finger moved closer to the button on the tablet and Nikita moved closer to her. "Whoa whoa whoa wait!" pleaded Nikita. "Put the tablet down, lady!" ordered Birkhoff as he pointed his gun at her.

"Is that what you want Nikita? You want to kill me to save Amanda?" Nikita slowly kept advancing on Carla. "Birkhoff, just put the gun down, I can handle her." Birkhoff shook his head "I hate to tell you this but your friend, is cuckoo for a certain cereal" Nikita turned to face him. "Just put the gun down and disable the tablet" pleaded Nikita. "I can't do that, the audio file has already been uploaded to the hotel system" cried Birkhoff in frustration.

"You see, it's our only chance while he's in that hotel" grinned Carla. "If you do this, Alex loses her support; she could die!" said Nikita with the pain in her eyes of the thought of a world without Alex.

"You've already blinded the cameras, Michael's on his way with support and from what I can see she is already capable of handling herself" said Carla confidently. "Wait, just wait until we find out she's Ok" pleaded Nikita once again with a tear coming to her eye. "We can't wait that long. With Amanda, you never know when you're going to get another shot. She always finds a way out, which means we have to take her down, NOW!"

"Which brings us back to: Put my hardware down, Bitch!" said Birkhoff still pointing his gun at Carla.

"Carla, you have my word. We will get, Amanda" Nikita wasn't able to hold strong, her voice was quivering now.

"You said it yourself, she's losing her funding. If she hooks up with the Russians, then there's no way for me to save the program!" shouted Carla, losing her cool. Nikita realised that she couldn't save Carla now, it was too late.

"Carla, I'm going to ask you one last time to put, the tablet, down" ordered Nikita. You could hear the click from Birkhoff's gun as he took the safety off. "So you are choosing Amanda over me? What have you become?"

Nikita couldn't hold it in any longer, the tears started running down her cheeks. "I'm not choosing Amanda! I'm choosing Alex! No matter what, I will always choose Alex!" shouted Nikita with the tears streaming now.

Birkhoff had never seen Nikita cry before. He was concerned and also scared. What did this mean? Why did this make her cry? Out of all the situations they had been in, why was this, the one that made her break?

"Do it" said Nikita looking directly at Carla, "but don't say I didn't warn you". There was a few seconds of dead silence before Carla put down the tablet and stepped away. "It makes me sick, what you've become" spat Carla as Birkhoff ran over to retrieve the tablet.

"Well at least I'm not deranged into thinking there's still a chance of saving Division" Nikita grabbed her gun off the table and hid it under her shirt. "Will you be able to manage here? Because I'm going to help Michael with Alex" Birkhoff nodded. "As long as I can lock her in the spare room" he smiled. "Whatever you need to do, do it; I don't care as long as she doesn't pull another stunt like that". And with that, she left.

"Michael, where are you?" asked Nikita through her earwig. "I'm parked outside the exit to the car park. There's no sign of Alex yet".

Nikita got out of her car and headed straight for the car park. "What are you doing?" asked Michael. "I'm going to find Alex. If I need you, I'll let you know" Michael rolled his eyes "I don't think that's wise".

Nikita didn't answer. Just as Michael was about to repeat his sentence, he heard gunshots. He rolled down the window, set up his rifle and waited.

"Alex!" shouted Nikita running over to the girl. "Nikita? What are you doing here?" asked a confused Alex. "Getting you out of here, that's what" Alex smiled to her-self before jumping up and shooting one of the Gogol henchmen.

"So what's you escape plan?" asked Alex ducking down again. "Well, I don't really have one" laughed Nikita.

"What? You don't have a plan? Now that's a new one" joked Alex. "I suppose we should get these guys off our backs" said Nikita as she peered out around the corner of the wall and taking three shots at another henchman.

"I'll cover you" Alex nodded. "On three: One. Two...Three!" shouted Nikita as they both got to their feet and ran. Alex shot one of the men in the shoulder, causing him to drop his weapon and fall to the ground in agony.

Nikita took out two more Gogol agents before she followed on after Alex.

Michael heard the gunshots and readied his gun. Then they came running out with three agents perusing them. Michael picked them off, one by one. Nikita led Alex to her car and started driving.

"We're OK. Thanks for the support. We'll meet you back at the house". "I'll see you there" said Michael happily.

"So why did you come to 'rescue' me?" asked Alex smiling. Nikita shrugged her shoulders "Because you're my partner and was in need of assistance." Alex looked out the window and smiled, then looked back to Nikita and asked "But how did you know I was in need of assistance?" and raised her eyebrow.

Nikita shrugged her shoulders again. "Don't shrug your shoulders! C'mon, tell me, how did you know?" Nikita decided not to tell Alex about Carla, and instead just told her "I had an inkling."

"Thanks" said Alex as she put her hand on Nikita's arm. "I don't know what I'd do without you".

A warm feeling ran through Nikita as Alex's hand rested on her arm. She felt so happy to know that Alex was safe with her, to know that she could protect her.

"Where's Nikita?" asked Birkhoff when Michael walked in. "She's said she'd meet us back here. Where's Carla?" asked Michael looking around. "You mean Britney Spears?" Michael looked at Birkhoff raising a brow. "What?" Birkhoff stood up and walked over to the fridge and took out a bear. "She completely lost it and hijacked my tablet. She was going to play the recording of Ari over the hotel com system. She wanted to get Ari killed to cut off Amanda's funding."

"What did Nikita do?" asked Michael walking over to Birkhoff. "She gave her an ultimatum. Put down the tablet, or let me shoot her" Michael shook his head "Wait, she was going to let you shoot her? No way, no way would Nikita do that."

"That's what I thought, but then she got all fired up and started crying..." Michael cut him off before he could finish "She started crying!" Birkhoff nodded his head, "I know, freaked me out too!"

Michael started pacing back and forth. "What made her cry?" "Carla accused her of choosing Amanda over her, and Nikita just lost it saying, and I quote: 'I'm not choosing Amanda! I'm choosing Alex! No matter what, I will always choose Alex!' then she started crying".

Michael stopped pacing. "Has this happened before? Like, maybe when I was in London?" Birkhoff put down his beer to think. "No. I've never seen her like this...Actually, wait. Remember when you first started sponging off me?" "You mean, when we became allies?" Michael corrected "Yeah. Well one of those nights, Nikita came home and she looked like she had been crying, but that's the only other time I can remember" stated Birkhoff.

Michael started to think back "I remember that night. I asked her what was wrong, and she told me that she did something bad that she'd live to regret for the rest of her life. But she wouldn't tell me what she did."

Just then Nikita and Alex walked in. "I think you should find out what's going on" whispered Birkhoff to Michael.

"Everything Ok?" asked Birkhoff. "Yeah fine, thanks, but tired. I'm gunna try and get some sleep. I'll see you in the morning" smiled Alex as she disappeared up the stairs.

"Would you look at the time, NCIS is on. I'm just gunna go watch that, um, in my room" said Birkhoff grabbing a bag of chips and leaving them alone.

"Why do I get the feeling he was trying to give us some 'alone time'?" asked Nikita laughing. "Because he is, I need to ask you something" said Michael walking closer to Nikita. "What do you want to ask me?" "Why were you crying earlier on?" Nikita stiffened. "So that's why Birkhoff left the room. He was scared that I was going to kill him" said Nikita trying to lighten the mood.

"At least tell me what you did that you'll regret for the rest of your life?" asked Michael seriously. Nikita looked walked away from Michael. "Why are you asking me this now?" Michael looked concerned. "Because I think it's linked with something that happened tonight".

Nikita felt a pang of guilt shoot through her, and she didn't know why. Michael was right, why she was crying tonight was the same reason why she was crying back then. Alex. She shot Alex so Amanda wouldn't ask any questions as to why Alex hadn't retrieved the Black box. She still regretted it to this day. There must have been something else she could have done. Alex must have hated her, how did she ever forgive her?

"Nikita? Are you going to answer my question?" asked Michael walking over to Nikita now. "I was just worried about Alex" replied Nikita. Michael wasn't satisfied with this answer.

"What about the regret?" Nikita shook her head "I'd rather keep that in the past. I don't want to talk about it". "Just tell me, because I'm not going to stop until I get an answer" stated Michael.

Alex woke up thirsty and walked out to the stairs where she could hear Nikita and Michael talking. Just as she was about to walk down, she heard her name being mentioned, so she sat down and listened.

"I told you, I was just worried about Alex" said Nikita dismissively. "Birkhoff said you were crying. Why would you be crying over Alex?" Nikita started walking away. "Nikita! Why were you crying over Alex?" "Because I didn't want her to get hurt!" shouted Nikita.

"Neither do I, none of us do. This situation was just like all of the other messes we get into, what made you cry at this one?"

"Because it would have been my fault! I was the one that told Birkhoff to record the conversation. So if Carla uploaded it, it would have been my fault, and I couldn't betray Alex again, not after what I did to her back then".

Michael took Nikita's hand "What happened? What did you do to her?"

Alex was listening intently to the conversation. She heard everything that was said. She didn't feel angry or betrayed, she only felt guilty, guilty for causing Nikita so much pain and emotional grief. She had the urge to go down and hug Nikita, let her know that everything's all right, that she doesn't have to feel bad about what she did, that she understands.

"I shot Alex" said Nikita with tears beginning to roll down her face. "And I'll never forgive myself for that".

Michael stood there, holding Nikita's hands, confused once again. "You shot Alex? But why?" asked Michael.

"So Amanda wouldn't ask her why she hadn't retrieved the Black box from me. I should never have shot her, there must have been another way" cried Nikita.

Michael pulled her in close to him and wrapped his arms around her. "You did what you had to, to keep her safe from Amanda and she forgave you for it. She's upstairs right now, safe and sound".

Alex was beginning to tear up her-self, listening to how Nikita was feeling. She decided to go and tell Nikita that everything was Ok when Carla came out.

"I hope you're crying over betraying me. Thanks to you, Amanda's probably plotting her next strike on us as we speak" said Carla with anger in her tone.

"How did you get out of your room?" asked Michael. "Out of her room?" asked Nikita wiping her eyes. "Um, Birkhoff said he locked her in the spare room" stated Michael. "I picked up a few tricks while I was in Division" laughed Carla.

"What are you doing here anyway, what do you want?" asked Michael. "I just want to see the girl that would make the great Nikita screw over the one person who took her in when no one else would" grinned Carla.

"I think it's about time you leave, don't you think?" said Michael as he approached her. Carla ran to the stairs and saw Alex at the top. "Well there she is in the flesh" smiled Carla. "You must be Alex".

Nikita walked over to the stairs and saw Alex standing at the top. They made eye contact and Nikita could still see the water in Alex's eyes from the unshed tears.

"You must be something quiet special to make Nikita threaten to kill me" sneered Carla. "That's enough" shouted Michael grabbing her by the arm. "I'm taking you back to where we found you, it's where you belong".

"Guys could you keep it down, Gibbs is just about to get a conf...What's going on out here? How did she get out?" asked Birkhoff appearing from his room. "We're taking her back to the city. We no longer need her here" said Michael.

"Oh that's right, use me up and throw me away when you're done. Such nice people you all are" said Carla. "What do you expect, lady. Don't mess with the lions, because you'll get eaten" teased Birkhoff.

"I hope you rot in hell for what you've become Nikita" spat Carla as Michael dragged her out. "I'll go help him" said Birkhoff following Michael out to the car.

When they left, Alex finally walked down to Nikita. "Are you Ok?" asked Alex placing her hand on Nikita's shoulder. Once again, a rush of warmth ran through Nikita at the feel of Alex's hand on her.

"How long were you there for?" asked Nikita. "Long enough" replied Alex. Nikita's head dropped. "I thought this was obvious, but I'll say it again: I forgive you. I don't want you to feel guilty or sad about what happened. I understand why you did what you did".

Nikita was trying her best to hold back the tears. Alex took a deep breath. "I care about you. I care about you a lot more than I thought I did. I don't want to see you in pain because of me. So please, forgive your-self" said Alex as her hand slid from Nikita's shoulder to her face.

She tried her best, but a tear escaped. Alex saw this, and gently wiped it away with her thumb. There was so much racing through Nikita's mind, but somehow, Alex seemed to calm her, make her feel safe.

"I care about you too" said Nikita looking into Alex's eyes. "I know" smiled Alex warmly. Nikita turned her whole body to face Alex and she hugged her. "I care about you so much" she whispered, hoping that Alex wouldn't hear, but she did.

Alex pulled out, with one hand still on Nikita's face, gently caressing her cheek with her thumb, and the other hand holding her close. Nikita was not used to not being in control. She didn't like this, but yet, she did.

She looked into Alex's blue eyes and felt another surge run through her. She slowly leaned in to kiss her. She could feel her warm breath against her skin and only centimetres away from her lips, the door opened. There was a slight delay before they let go of one another. A familiar voice called out. "Hello? Alex? Nikita?"

It was Sean.

So what did you think of the first chapter? If there's any mistakes, just ignore them, it's kinda late (or early in the morning) to proof read it. So please review and let me know what you think, or let me know if you have any requests. They will all be read and taken in to account. Thank you!