The first time he sees her, he doesn't even notice her. It's not his fault, or hers. Mini and Liv are having a screaming match on the first day of college. Mini's hair is full of yellow feathers and she's shouting on the top of her lungs. Liv is crying angry tears and wiping them off her face with her multicolored sweatshirt. They're both so visually and audiology loud, it's not that strange that he doesn't notice the tiny girl who tries to make peace between them.
"Take your clothes off!" some guy calls.
Mini stops screaming, stares the guy down (it was probably Rider) and stalks off.
…
The first time he notices her, he's supposed to notice Mini. Alo parks his car outside her house and refuses to leave. Rich leans back against the passenger seat.
"She's like a goddess" Alo breathes loudly as he spots Mini through a window.
"She's fake" Rich says.
Alo punches his arm hard.
"Shut up! You're talking about the mother of my future children!"
Rich curses his best friend's obsession with bitchy girls as the three of them finally come out of the door. They're laughing, hands clamped tightly together, singing some song loudly.
"She's heavenly" Alo whispers, almost in awe.
The girls pass the car, too close for Rich's liking but neither of them seem to realize that a skinny ginger boy is staring imploringly at their tits.
"Stalking is a crime, y'know" Rich drawls.
But he too watches as the girls leave. Grace is in the middle, one girl in each hand, skipping with glee on the pavement. Her singing voice is the loudest, her laughter the clearest. That's it. That's the first time he notices her.
…
The first time she speaks to him is also the first time she touches him.
"I like your hair" she says.
"What?"
"I like your hair" she repeats, a polite smile on her face.
"Are you shitting me?"
"No" she says, an affronted look on her face.
"Whatever" he mutters.
"That's thank you in Rich's language" Alo interjects in an attempt to bond with a girl (a girl).
"I'm Grace" she tells them and holds out her hand formally.
Alo and Rich share a look before they shake it. Her skin is soft and warm. Her hand feels tiny in his.
"I'm new" she explains.
"We're old" Alo jokes and Rich sighs loudly.
"Actually, we're late" he reminds them.
He pulls Alo away from her. She calls something after them. Probably good-bye but Rich had already put his headphones on.
..
The first time he speaks about her, Alo brings her up.
"Grace is nice" he says over and over again. "If we become friends with her, she might introduce me to Mini."
"She spoke to you once" Rich sighs.
"No, she spoke to you, but you were too much of an asshole to answer her like a human being."
"I thought she was messing with me."
"Maybe she just likes long hair."
"I swear that she doesn't even know what metal is."
Alo grins.
"Who the fuck does?"
Rich huffs and turns the music up. In contrast to Alo, he has no longing to become friends with girls who wear broaches and pink nail varnish.
…
The first time they're alone is after the Franky kidnap. Alo and Franky are playing some drunken game of arm wrestling at the other end of the swimming pool area. Rich tries to dry his underpants without taking them off.
"She's a nice girl, Franky is" Grace says.
She's huddled in a towel, her underwear and bra is hanging on a deck chair.
"Sure" Rich agrees.
"I wish… I wish Mini would see that."
"Mini's a bitch."
She frowns at him.
"She's my best friend."
"Sorry."
She smiles.
"You're right, though. She is a bitch."
…
The first time he thinks about her, he feels sick. Not from thinking about her exactly. Probably from the beer he downed too quickly. (Having a weak stomach isn't very metal). He feels sick and thinks about Grace. The stern look in her eyes when he accused of being a pushover. The exposed skin between her shirt and her jeans. The way he wanted to touch it. Touch her. The way she looked away when he left her on that street. He thinks about it some more. Then he throws up. Not very metal.
…
The first time she takes his hand, he stares at it, not sure what to do.
"I'm not going to hurt you" she jokes.
"I've never held anyone's hand before" he says.
"Not ever? Not even when you were a kid?"
He shrugs
"Yeah, well, probably when I was a kid."
She takes his other hand too. Her hands are dark next to his pale skin.
"You're the not the handholding type, eh? " she asks.
"No."
She drops his hands. They fall to his sides. Empty. Cold.
"Baby steps" she whispers.
"Yeah" he exhales.
She nudges his arm.
"I still like you, even if you're too bad ass for your own good."
He smiles
"I'm just bad ass enough."
…
The first time she says that she's loves him, it's no big deal to her. At least Rich thinks so. She bites her lips and just says it.
"I love you quite a bit, Rich" she says and smiles.
Grace loves everyone. He shouldn't feel special, but he can't help it.
"Euw" he answers and she giggles.
She runs away from him but he can still smell her scent on him. I love you quite a bit. That shouldn't make him feel anything, it's just words. But he can't help it. It's a big deal to him.
…
The first time he makes love to her, they are both so nervous it's ridiculous. His parents are downstairs and he doesn't know if he's hurting her or not.
"You can kiss me harder than that" she whispers against his skin. "I won't break."
He presses himself closer to her, to her skin, to her warmth. She is soft and hard at the same time. She looks at him like no one has ever looked at him before. Maybe it's desire. Maybe it's love. I love you quite a bit.
"You love everyone, don't you?" he asks.
She giggles.
"Yes. But not like I love you."
…
The first time he admits to himself that he loves her back, he watches her sleep. That's it. Nothing exciting or romantic happens. But he watches her sleep. Rich has never watched another person sleep before. He watches her chest rise and fall. He sees how her eyelashes rest against her skin. He hears her mumble random things into the night. He watches her sleep and that is it. That's how he knows that he loves her back because why else would you enjoy watching someone else sleep?
…
The first time he has doubts about marrying her, he calls her.
"This is a stupid idea" he informs her.
"Richard" she sighs. "You are the one who asked me!"
He can picture her sitting at her desk. He wonders what she's wearing (no, not that like you perv), what she's doing.
"I know" he mumbles. "But it's still a stupid idea."
She laughs and he can't help but smile. And that's when the doubt vanishes. All he needed was to hear her voice, her laughter. If he could smell her right now, he might marry her right now.
"You can't take it back" she teases. "Franky already made me a dress."
"Yes, that right. We shouldn't doubt the most important decision of our lives because that would be a waste of fabric" he says sarcastically.
She giggles silently.
"See you in the morning" she says. "Don't get too drunk tonight."
"You still wanna marry me? Even if I'm a cynical asshole?"
"You might be an asshole occasionally, but you're not cynical. I'm not the one who climbed up the wall and recited Shakespeare."
He hangs up before he says something rude.
…
The first time Grace meets his parents (officially) is the day after the wedding. Or not wedding. Whatever. She's still wearing the wedding dress, his hair is still short.
"Oh my god" his mother cries at the sight of him and reaches out to pat his head. "Finally."
"Cheers, mum" he mutters.
"I'm Grace" Grace interrupts the cries about his hair and extends her hand. "Rich's girlfriend."
Anita blinks at Grace and her polite gesture.
"Girlfriend?"
"Is she the girl who's been sleeping over a lot?" Kevin calls from the kitchen.
"What girl?" his mother asks.
"Yes" Grace says happily. "That's me."
"Is this a serious thing?" Anita asks, still switching between staring at Grace and Rich's hair.
"Fairly" Grace smiles. "We almost got married today."
"Changed our minds though" Rich yawns.
Then he takes Grace's hand and leads her up the stairs.
"Thank you!" Anita calls up the stairs. "For making him cut his hair!"
"Oh no" Grace calls back. "That wasn't me. I loved his hair."
…
The first time they fight, for real, like a serious fight, is because they are both bored. It's raining and she's reading and he's just fucking bored.
"Can't we just do something?" he whines.
"Fine" she snaps. "Come up with something then."
That's not fair. He's not the imaginative one of them. She is.
"We could… We could…"
She peers over her book.
"Yes?"
"Fuck it. I'm bored" he sighs.
"Stop bitching about it."
"I'm sick of this fucking town. Everyone's away. Time's standing still."
"You sick of me too?" she asks.
"Nah, come on."
She rolls her eyes and stares back into her book.
"Grace, you can't honestly think this is fun. Isn't summers supposed to be fun?"
"I like being here, because you are here."
"Yeah, but all we ever do is hang out."
She gets up, grabs her bag and goes out into the rain. He watches her leave, doesn't run after her, and doesn't apologize. (Why should he apologize? He was only telling the truth.)
…
The first time he says he's sorry to her (and like, ever), she forgives him without blinking an eye.
"I'm sorry too" she says.
She slips a hand into his and squeezes. Rich used to think he wasn't the type of guy that would hold his girlfriend's hand, but he squeezes back.
"I'd rather be with you, bored, than alone" he says even though it's terribly cheesy.
She smiles.
"I know."
She stands on tiptoe when they kiss, their hands are still clamped together.
"I'd rather be with you than with anyone else, ever" she whispers and for some reason it doesn't sound cheesy at all when she says it.
He kisses her cheeks and her forehead and end s with her lips. He knows her face so well but can't ever get used to looking at it.
"Don't make me blush" he murmurs.
"Impossible" she whispers back. "For that, you would need to have feelings."
He shuts her up with another kiss.
…
The last time he speaks to her, he can barely hear her. The music is so loud and the ocean waves are crashing. She presses her soft mouth against his ear and screams something about Matty. He nods and shrugs to show that he doesn't hear. She takes a step away from him and he pulls her back.
"Don't go" he shouts.
He's a bit drunk and loves her more than ever. It's sunny and hot and she is the most beautiful person in the entire world.
"I'll be back soon" she promises.
...
The last thing she ever says to him is a lie.