Chapter 1

I sit in my room the whole weekend ignoring all the phone calls especially the ones from Kelly. How dare she call me worried about me she's the reason I'm miserable. Brandon's stuck his head in a few times and I bit it off literally and he never bothered me again. I just sit listening to losing my religion over and over again remembering the first time me and Dylan broke up. It's Sunday night and I no everyone's wondering what's going to happen tomorrow but I honestly don't know all I know is that I am so angry.

"Hey, Brenda could you catch a ride with Dad to school tomorrow I've got to be there early" Brandon says sticking his head in nervously.

"Okay whatever" I say going back to listening and cutting up pictures.

"Brenda some people were asking about you at the peach Pit" Brandon says nervously.

"Like who" I ask.

"Donna, Andrea, Dylan, and Kelly" Brandon says.

"Tell, Andrea, Donna, and Dylan I said hi" I reply back.

Brandon leaves the room and I go back to moping. I mean I knew he would chose eventually I just never really thought he would chose her over me I guess I didn't mean as much to Dylan as I thought I did. Now I understand what he meant when he says love hurts because nothing hurts worst than seeing the man you love with someone else and that's what I'm going to have to face tomorrow. The next morning Dad drops me off at school I put on a brave face as I head inside to my locker. I look up to see Dylan and Kelly kissing. I turn back around and shut my locker knowing that I have to walk past them to get to class.

"Hey, Bren how are you" Dylan says as I walk past them I ignore him and keep walking.

I head to my Spanish class and take a seat in the back I just remembered I have this class with Kelly and Dylan. The two walk into the classroom and take their seats. I listen to the lesson and leave as soon as class is over trying to avoid them.

"Brenda please talk to me don't shut me out like this" Kelly says behind me.

I turn and glare at her not believing her nerve how dare she the little boyfriend stealing bitch.

"What more do you want Kelly you have Dylan did you really think we would be friends after this?" I say before walking away.

I continue through school and I'm fine Kelly and Dylan both leave me alone then I head to lunch. I walk over to our usual table and sit down. Soon the others join us. Everything's cool until Kelly decides she wants to molest Dylan in front of my face.

"I'm going to sit somewhere else" I say stomping off to another table.

I hear the raised voices from the table I left as I walk away but I don't care it's taking everything in me not to cry. I knew it was going to be hard and I knew it was going to hurt but I never thought it would hurt this much. I say as I finally sit at an empty table far away from my old one.

Meanwhile back at the other table everyone is glaring at Kelly and Dylan.

"How could you do that it was hard enough getting her to come to school today" Brandon says angrily.

"I didn't do anything I just kissed my boyfriend" Kelly defends angrily.

"Oh please Kelly everyone knows you're rubbing it in Brenda's face that you won" Steve says angrily.

"I am not" Kelly defends.

"Then why did you kiss Dylan knowing that Brenda was sitting right here" Donna says.

"Come on guys she's going to have to get use to seeing me and Dylan kiss eventually" Kelly says.

"You know what Kel you really are a bitch" Brandon says before grabbing his tray and walking over to join his sister.

"God I don't know what his problem is" Kelly says.

"You're his problem and the fact that you enjoy hurting his sister" Andrea says getting up and going over to the table with Brenda and Brandon.

"Okay well at least that's over" Kelly says.

"You know what Kelly I thought you would at least care about you ex-best friends feelings but I guess the only thing you care about is Dylan" Donna says getting up and leaving the table.

"So are you going to call me names and leave too Steve and David" Kelly asks angrily.

"Kelly I've always stood by you and I always will I'm your brother" David says.

"Hey, Kel I'll be honest what you did a few minutes ago was cruel and heartless but you know I'd never abandon you no matter what you do" Steve says.

"Thanks guys" Kelly says.

Then Kelly realizes that Dylan hasn't said anything this whole time.

"Dylan are you okay" Kelly asks.

"Don't do that again around Brenda Kelly this is hard enough for her as it is" Dylan says before getting up and walking back into the school.

Kelly looks over to the table where Brandon, Brenda, Donna, and Andrea are sitting and feels guilty as she sees Brandon wrap his arm around Brenda.

I can't do this as soon as lunch is over I head to the office to go home. As I am waiting outside for my Mom to come and get me I hear a voice that I would recognize anywhere.

"Bren what are you doing out here shouldn't you be in class" Dylan says sitting beside me.

I turn away trying to ignore him.

"Bren don't be like this" Dylan says in a pleading voice.

"What do you want from me huh Dylan you choice and I'm living with it but don't expect things to be like they used to because they're not so please just leave me alone talking to you hurts, looking at you hurts, being around you hurts and God I wish I didn't still love you but I do and that hurts because it kills me to see you with Kelly. I scream just as my mom pulls up.

I rush to the car leaving Dylan sitting on the front steps of West Beverly Hills High. I know I shouldn't have said that but I'm tired of holding in my feelings I need to be honest I need to let people know how I feel.

"Brenda honey are you okay" Mom asks me.

"No, I'm not okay" I finally admit breaking down into tears.

Mom drives me home as I cry she walks me upstairs to my room and sits down with me.

"You want to talk about it sweetie" Mom asks.

"Mom it hurts so much how do I stop loving him please help me stop loving him" I plead with my mother as more tears falls.

"Sweetheart I wish I could take away your pain I really do and I wish I could make you stop loving him but I can't" Mom says sadly.

"It's okay Mom I'm feeling a lot better now" I say wiping my tears away.

"Brenda don't ever hide your feelings from us sweetie tell us how you're feeling we might not be able to fix it but we can listen okay" Mom says.

"Thanks Mom I will I promise" I say before lying down and falling asleep.

I awake to auguring downstairs.

"You are the last person she wants to see right now haven't you hurt my daughter enough huh Dylan" Jim yells angrily.

"Jim I'm sorry but I need to talk to Bren" Dylan says.