A/N: I know some lucky people are already playing ME3 and have already seen the interaction between Shepard and Alenko but I had some thoughts on how they could come together. Please let me know what you think and I hope you enjoy it.

Bioware owns all - I'm just playing in their universe.

EDI was worried; at least that's what she thought it was. According to every definition she could find that was exactly what she was feeling. This was all new, these strange sensations that she'd had since Joker had freed her from the imposed restraints. Even thinking of him as Joker was new, it was always Mr Moreau before.

But that wasn't what was worrying her. Commander Shepard was the problem. After her last assignment, one she did alone which was also worrying, she had locked herself in her quarters and sobbed herself to sleep. EDI observed her now, curled in a foetal position, holding the picture of Kaidan Alenko tightly to her chest. She was asleep but it wasn't a gentle or quiet sleep. Shepard was obviously dreaming.

Unsure of what to do, whether she should do anything EDI recalled everything she had seen, heard and been involved in since Shepard had taken over the Normandy. She read and reread mission records, messages, conversations and any other information pertaining to Shepard and the crew of the Normandy.

In the space of seconds EDI realised that this last mission was different, Admiral Hackett had put Shepard in a position of having to make heartbreaking decisions that were now tearing her apart, he had sent her into a situation where she could have died - again. The fact that a complete solar system had been destroyed and thousands of Batarians had died didn't concern EDI as much as what it had done to Shepard.

Hackett had sent her out there, in fact Hackett had sent her on several assignments where she had nearly been killed or lost her ground crew. EDI found herself disliking Admiral Hackett. She had been listening during the conversation in medbay after the assignment and she knew Shepard would go to Earth to face the consequences of what Hackett had forced her to do. It was who she was and Hackett knew it.

'Jeff,' EDI's holographic orb appeared on the bridge.

'Yes EDI,' Joker was carrying out final checks before the order to head somewhere came through.

'Is it wrong to expel someone out an airlock if they hurt someone you care about?'

Whoa, Joker was a little taken aback. He knew EDI was still coming to terms with the new sensations, feelings of sorts that she had been opened up to. She was like a child learning morals and ethics so careful wording was a must.

'What's wrong EDI,' He stopped what he was doing and turned to look at her. Was she a darker colour than normal?

An image flicked up on his terminal of Commander Shepard in her quarters. Joker stared at the woman lying curled up on the bed, her eyes red and swollen, hugging what he knew was an image of Kaidan. It scared him. Shepard was always the strong warrior with broad shoulders ready to face anything. This was not her. This woman was broken and desolate. He could see from the way she shivered and jerked that she was dreaming.

'EDI, I'm going to ask you something that I shouldn't,' Jeff looked long and hard at the image before him then flicked it off. 'What happened on her last assignment?"

Shepard's last assignment had been top secret, no-one knew why she had gone only that she had been ordered to, and gone alone. It was an Alliance mission – strange considering they condemned her for working for Cerberus, even when she wasn't. She had been a mess when she came back on board, physically and emotionally. It had been even stranger when Admiral Hackett came on board and spent some time in the medbay with Shepard before leaving again.

EDI didn't hesitate, she played the conversation from the medbay through Joker's console, softly so only he could hear it. He went white as he listened and his hands started to shake, whether that was from anger or fear he couldn't say. He had been an Alliance soldier for most of his life, until Shepard died and they accused him and others of lying, blamed Shepard for spreading rumours, trying to frighten people. He had never trusted the Alliance since and now he had a reason to hate them. He could understand EDI wanting to expel Hackett out the airlock.

'EDI this stays between us,' he glanced at the orb glowing to his left.

'Of course, Jeff,' EDI said softly. 'Can you answer my question now?'

He sighed and spoke slowly, 'No it is not wrong to want to throw someone out the airlock but it is wrong to actually do it. Can you understand that?'

'Yes Jeff,' EDI went quiet for a moment. 'Who is Kaidan?' EDI knew he was someone from Shepard's past but understanding relationships was still confusing for her.

'Shepard loved, still loves Kaidan,' Joker smiled as he remembered them trying to hide what they felt, not very successfully. 'If Shepard hadn't died they may well have married.'

'But she is alive now, why did he not come back with her from Horizon? Does he still love her?'

Damn this was hard, Joker wanted to make sure EDI understood the dynamics of human relationships. How did you explain the loss you feel when someone dies to a child, it was hard enough as an adult, especially when you felt responsible for that death. He still blamed himself sometimes even though Shepard had made it quite clear she didn't.

'When she died so did he, not physically but emotionally he closed off, shut down. He blamed himself for leaving her, for her dying.' Joker took a deep breath, he knew that feeling well. 'He went on missions that could have seen him killed, I think that might have been what he wanted so he didn't have to live without her.

When he found out she was alive he couldn't believe that she had died, it wasn't possible for someone to come back to life. He couldn't accept it so he accused her of things he knew deep down weren't true but he was hurting all over again. And the fact that she was working with Cerberus was hard to come to terms with. It opened up all the emotions he had closed off. He lashed out because he obviously still loves her.'

'So the message he sent her was an apology,' EDI seemed to be thinking out loud.

'He sent her a message?' Joker frowned. Before he could continue the message appeared on his screen – 'Re Horizon'. Joker knew he shouldn't but he read it anyway. 'Yes I guess it is an apology of sorts. A way out as Kaidan used to say, always leave a way out.' Joker couldn't stop the tears that formed behind his eyes. Kaidan had been his friend, he had never blamed him for Shepard's death either even though Joker had tried his best to make him yell and shout at Joker for being so stubborn, for being responsible. They both knew that Shepard would not have done anything differently – she would have died for any of her crew, it was just bad luck that she died for him.

'Jeff, are you alright?' EDI sounded genuinely concerned.

'Just memories EDI,' He sighed and pulled himself up in his seat. 'She went looking for him when she came back, before Horizon, but Anderson stonewalled her. The Illusive Man told her he couldn't find him but I doubt he even tried. He didn't want her looking for her past when he'd brought her back to protect the future.'

Someone else to throw out an airlock, they both thought at the same time. Joker hadn't thought about it much until now but if she had found him earlier and been able to explain would things have been different. He liked to believe they would have been. Two people in love like they were could have worked through everything, if they'd been given the chance.

'I'm curious EDI,' Joker was pushing the boundaries but he needed to know, 'Did she respond?"

'She wrote several messages and recorded several vids but never sent them.'

'Maybe she should have,' Joker sighed. 'Is she still asleep?'

The image of Shepard tossing on her bed and crying out broke Joker's heart. 'EDI, take the helm and unlock her door.'

'Yes Jeff.'

Joker climbed out of his chair and made his way to Shepard's quarters. He knew he had no right to do it but she needed to not be alone. He found her sobbing in her sleep, fighting someone or something. As risky as it was he lay down on the bed beside her and pulled her into his arms, covering them both with a blanket. He held her tight as she struggled with whatever demons haunted her and eventually she stopped fighting and simply sobbed into his chest. After a while she seemed to drop into a more relaxed sleep and Joker held her softly while she slept.

EDI had other ideas, while Joker dealt with the physical side of Shepard EDI did something that had she been human would have been completely unethical.