Disclaimer: I am not victorious in owning Victorious. Go sue someone else.

"How you doin'?"

".. Did you just pull a Joey on me?"

"Maybe.. It's on my next list of pick up lines."

"Jaaaadddeeee."

"Fine, if you don't want to hear them, I can always go ask some other girl."

"Sit down. And wipe that smirk off your face."

"Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

"Just start before I change my mind."

"..."

"Jade!"

"Fine. Your body is a wonderland and I want to be Alice."

"Get in line."

"You better be kidding, Vega."

"Okay, okay, you can cut to the front of the line."

"Better. Life without you would be like a broken pencil...pointless."

"You could always sharpen it?"

"What?"

"The pencil.. If it's pointless, sharpen it."

"I think you missed the whole point of that pick up line."

"No, I got it. My heart just goes out to that poor pencil, whose user is too stupid to sharpen it when it snaps."

"You've been hanging around Cat too much. I know I'm not a grocery item but I can tell when you're checking me out."

"Well I hardly do it secretly, do I?"

"Good point. You're so hot when I look at you I get a tan."

"Ha."

"What?"

"I'm imagining you with a tan. Hahahaha."

"You done?"

"Sure."

"Thank you. You look so sweet you're giving me a toothache."

"Go to the dentist then. Next?"

"You've got something on your ass; my eyes."

"Take a picture, it'd last longer."

"I already have."

"Good. Wait, what?"

".. Are your pants on discount? 'Cause if you were at my house they would be a 100% off."

"Why do I believe that?"

"Because it's what usually happens."

"True."

"The word of the day is legs, let's go home and spread the word."

"Whose house?"

"Tooorrrrriiiii. Don't tempt me."

"Fiiinnnee. Go on, then."

"I'm no Flintstone, but I can make your Bed Rock."

"Now who's tempting who?"

"I'm a hands on learner and I want to learn about you."

"You should be an expert on the subject by now."

"Oh, I am."

"Don't do that!"

"Do what?"

"Smirk at me, all seductive like!"

"Hey baby, want to play lion? You go on all fours and I'll throw you my meat."

"Pretty sure you don't have the right equipment to play lion with."

"I'm no gyno but I'll take a look."

"I'm sure you would. You're just ever so helpful."

"You're just ever so helpful!"

"I don't talk like that!"

"Wanna play carnival? You sit on my face and I guess how much you weigh."

"That game could seriously hurt someones feelings."

"Kiss me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name pineapple? MMMPPHH!"

"What? You said 'kiss me if I'm wrong', and you were."

"Sex is a killer.. Want to die happy?"

"I don't want to die anytime soon, maybe we shouldn't have sex for a while."

"You better be kidding."

"You know I am."

"Damn straight."

"There's nothing straight about you."

"Shut up. Wanna play train? I can sit on your face and you can chew chew.. Vega?.. Say something!"

"I thought you wanted me to shut up?"

"Smart ass. Are you a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you."

"Next, before I think too much about it and become offended that you're implying I'm a prostitute."

"Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour."

"Just an hour?"

"Now you need to stop smirking."

"You never do, why should I?"

"Hmph. Please tell your boobs to quit staring at my eyes."

"Boobs, quit staring at Jade's eyes!"

"Ha-ha, you're such a comedian."

"Thanks."

"If you were a president, you'd be Babe-raham Lincoln."

"Haha, that one's actually kind of funny."

"Really?"

"Eh."

"Your shirt has to go, but you can stay."

"How about my shirt stays, and I go?"

"Don't make threats you can't keep."

"How do you know I wouldn't? Okay, I wouldn't! Just stop looking at me like that!"

"Ha. You're like a candy bar, half sweet and half nuts."

"I must be nuts if I love a psychopath like you."

"Aww, I love you too. If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer."

"That would get annoying. Y'know, if a stop light turned red everytime you drove through it."

"Stop being so technical."

"I'd say sorry, but I'm not."

"Your lips look so lonely.. Would they like to meet mine?"

"Depends how long you're going to keep this bullshit up."

"Not much longer. Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I'll owe you one."

"That's happened before. You STILL owe me, Jadelyn."

"If you were a Dementor, I'd become a criminal just to get your kiss."

"A Harry Potter reference? Seriously?"

"What? Harry Potter's awesome."

"You're only saying that because you're in love with Bellatrix."

"Pshc. The best part of me is covered up."

"I know."

"Wanna see a trick I learned in prison?"

"Huh.."

"What now?"

"Well I don't really know if I can just take that as a joke, since we've actually BEEN to prison."

"Good old Yerba."

"Yeah.. Let's never go back."

"Not even for a million bucks."

"..."

"..."

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?"

"I don't know, what am I doing in your mind?"

"Temptress."

"What can I say, I learnt from the best."

"I know you did."

"Yeah, Cat's great like that. Oh don't scowl, you know I'm kidding."

"I hope you know CPR, 'cause you take my breath away."

"Any excuse to try and get my lips on yours."

"Are you complaining?"

"God, no."

"I bet my tongue can beat up your tongue."

"Hmm, challenge accepted.."

A/N: Look what I did! Actually, if you're down here, you should have already seen what I did. So never mind?

Review, because my hands are numbly cold. We've skipped Autumn here this year, I swear. Reviews will make warmth sweep through my fingertips and down to my palms. If that's not a good enough reason, SCREW YOU GUYS, I'M GOING HOME.