I still don't own anything to do with Criminal Minds, and whatever – that's cool.

And, here we are, finally at the end… because I can TOO finish things.

Part fourteen: And Then… The End

In the immortal words of her step-father… OH GODDAMN FUCKING HILLBILLY HOOKER SHIT.

Penelope winced and waited for the contraction to pass before she rejoined Fran in the living room. "We have a problem," she commented as calmly as she could. "My water broke upstairs and my contractions are about six minutes apart – which is as long as it took me to clean up and put on dry clothes."

"Well, then," Fran said with a smile, "we should probably call the hospital and get your bag –"

"And try to call Derek," Penelope reminded her. "God," she sighed, putting her hands on her belly, "why didn't you wait till they finished the case, Lydia?"

"Because that little girl is ready to meet everybody," Fran replied. "And no amount of talking her down will make a difference – she's ready to get out into the world." She got out her phone and dialed Derek – it was an old mom-proof phone, so it even had buttons to push. "Hey, Baby Boy – don't freak out or anything, but your daughter is on the way. Penelope is fine. Yes, I promise, I will – your girls are in good hands." She hung up and appraised Penelope, who had taken the chance to fall into her comfy chair and relax quietly for a moment. "He said, and I quote, 'Are you fucking kidding me?'"

Penelope cracked a wry smile. "Of course he did," she murmured. "I'm saying about the same thing right now… but it's not like I have a choice. They're all the way out in California and he probably won't make it home in time."

"Right," Fran agreed. "Which is why he put me in charge. So I'm going to get your bag and call the hospital and you're going to be fine."

She woke up at three in the morning to the sound of Derek's rubber soles squeaking as he slid to a stop by her bed. "You're late," Penelope accused, stifling a yawn. "All the excitement is over."

He smiled and leaned down to kiss her. "Baby Girl, the excitement is just beginning…"

"Mmm, yeah, late night feedings and no time for sex and –" she teased with a small smile.

"How're you feeling?"

"Tired, sore – exactly how I'm supposed to feel after pushing a watermelon out of a hole the size of a whatever," she replied. "Have you gone by the nursery yet?"

He nodded and his smile grew. "She's gorgeous, just like her Mama –"

"Lydia Darlene Morgan," Penelope murmured, fighting another yawn. "And she eats like her daddy – she packs it away like no-one's business."

"I'm proud of you, Baby Girl," Derek said softly. "But go ahead and get some sleep. We have time to talk and figure things out," he promised.

"Did you catch the unsub?" she mumbled.

"Shot him myself – I had to get back to my girls," he said proudly.

"Good daddy," she whispered, falling asleep again.

"Hey, you two – get back from the water," Penelope scolded. "You don't go that close to the water in the dark."

Lydia and Jerome ran back to them, giggling. "Mommy, Daddy, we found shells!" Jerome shouted, holding up a handful of wet sand.

Derek snickered and winked at Penelope. "They're your kids," he reminded her.

She smiled and scooped her son up into her arms. "Are they pretty shells, my little man?" she asked the three year old. He beamed at her and lay his head on her shoulder. "Well, good job, then," she said proudly. "What about you, Lyddie?"

"I just found sand," the four year old Lydia replied with a soul-heaving sigh. "Maybe tomorrow, right, Mommy? Isn't that why we came to the beach?"

Penelope and Derek shared a glance and a smile. Not exactly, but their kids didn't need to know they'd both been conceived on this very beach…

Fin