Waiting

She couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't take waiting, not knowing where he was or even if he was alive. Robin slid to the floor of the apartment he had sent her to a month ago. Her heart ached, her throat grew hot and dry. She couldn't tell if she would throw up and break out into tears.

She remembered his touch, how he pulled her to safety in all that chaos. Robin knew that she hadn't been kidding herself. She knew that when her heart beat a little faster when she was alone with him and that after speaking with him she would smile more and feel giddy for the rest of the day, she knew that it meant something. Robin knew there was something there for him too. In that one moment, his touch and his eyes told her he hadn't wanted to let go.

After seeing her old friend earlier that day it became painfully clear that he might never come back.

Robin felt like she couldn't breathe. She closed her eyes, trying to shut out the thought that he was gone.

Amon was the only person who made her feel so at home. He made her feel accepted. He fought for her. He might have died for her.

But why? What was the point? Why would he give his life for her? When she…might even be a witch. When she didn't have one thing going for her except her powers, when all she knew was how to hunt or kill!

She clutched her chest gasping for air she felt she didn't deserve. No. Not when he had so much, not when he had been so strong.

Robin knew Nagira could hear. She knew that he was probably at her door, wishing he could say something to cheer her up. She knew that he always heard.

She felt like she was losing her mind. Constantly doubting herself, always seeing him around the corner, she grew exhausted and empty.

All she wanted to do was cry. Just to cry everything out and then she could wake up with everything back to normal again. Robin knew that wasn't going to happen, that it was impossible. Still, she wished. Sometimes she pretended, telling herself things were just fine.

The problem with being a sort-of detective, was that she was far to skeptical to believe her own lies.

Robin felt warm tears slip down her cheeks. She bowed forward, forehead touching the cool floor. There had to be something she could do to not feel that way.

Somehow, he had become everything. It surprised her and yet felt so natural. Amon had slipped into her life and became the driving force of her being. It wasn't fair. How could she fell like this so young? And for such a man? He was so much older. He was a hunter and a killer too.

Was this really the path she was supposed to take? Or was she going down the wrong road? Worry, anger and sadness bubbled in her stomach, trying to break out of her and explode.

She had to be a fool. The biggest fool in the world, that was her. Robin laid on her side, pretending she could see him sitting next to her. Are you a hunter or a child? Stop throwing a tantrum and get ready.

She imagined him scolding her. Perhaps he was also scolding himself for feeling such a way for someone he shouldn't. Maybe it was harder for him. Maybe he…

"Stupid!" She hissed. Why did she insist he felt something for her? Why did it matter when he was gone? "I'm so stupid!"

Robin remembered his hand holding hers for just a moment. She remembered his face close to hers, whispering directions. She remembered the desperate look on her face when he pushed her back into the hidden stairwell. The sounds of gunshots filled her ears.

She tried to block out the sound that came from within her head by covering her ears.

Amon hadn't even liked her. In fact, he probably hated her at first. But they became partners, and that meant more to her than the world, and that meant enough to him to risk everything for her.

He believed in her.

I must, Robin thought as she watched the night sky from outside her window, believe in him.

A/N:
My kinda/sorta valentine's Day update! I think I'll write fluff next year. Anyway, takes place after Robin meets with Dojima the first time after the attack on SYN-J.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!