Christmas eve aim: Update as many stories as I can on fan fiction . net

Merry Christmas! x

I carried on walking towards the gate, with Potter hot on my heels.

"This is how you get to Hogsmeade? You just walk through the gate, no secret passages or anything? I thought you said you were going to be subtle!" He shouted.

"I am being subtle." I told him. "I'm acting natural, if I look like an idiot then people will take notice"

I mumbled the spell that I had learnt in my second year here, to stroll through the gate with ease. Being Potter, he just continued to follow me.

"You know it's pretty weird having you stalking me like that! And besides, we were supposed to act natural and not draw attention to ourselves, which is pretty hard to do when you're walking as if we're in an argument!"

"Well what do you want me to do about it?"

"Walk next to me you idiot, and act natural" I warned him as we arrived in the main village. He walked right by my side and wrapped his arm around my waist.

"What the fuck do you think you are doing" I asked him, throwing it off quickly.

"I am trying to act natural!"

"By putting your hand on my ass?"

"I thought we already clarified that you had a nice ass!"

"Stand next to me but do not touch me!" I hissed.

"Now look who's not being subtle"

"Fine"

"What's fine?"

"Put your arm around my waist but if it goes any lower than that you will lose it and that is a promise"

He did as I said, his arm comfortably wrapped around my petite waist. We walked through the darkening streets of Hogsmeade until we arrived at my favorite pub: The Three Broomsticks.

"This is where you want to go? It seems a little mainstream for you" Potter said as I lead him into the building. "The Hogs Head is good..."

"Well this is my trip and you are just tagging along like a dog" I reminded him taking a seat in the corner.

"Woof" He said sarcastically, causing me to let out a little chuckle.

"Did I just make you laugh?" He asked. "Did I James Sirius Potter make Blake Wood laugh?"

"Don't flatter yourself you big-headed idiot" I smirked.

"Whatever" He said, looking at the menu.

"Blake! Shouldn't you be at school?" Madame Rosmerta asked me. If Madame Rosmerta was old before she was ancient now, with white hair and more wrinkles than an Elephants scrotum.

"But Rosmerta, if I was at school I wouldn't get to come here and see you!" I reminded her sweetly.

"Oh, alright young lady, I'll get you your usual on our secret, but this is the last time!" She warned me, before realizing that today there was another person at the table. "And Blake who is this handsome young man who has accompanied you today?"

"He's my...Quidditch captain?" I said, unable to think what title I was to give him.

"James Potter" He said, shaking Rosmerta's bony hand.

"James Potter? Well, you are the spitting image of your grandfather! I used to serve him years ago. What can I get you to drink James Potter the Second?"

"Red current rum please, no ice" He asked, seeming to lean into the corner as he did so.

"Red current run no ice? Well, that is exactly your grandfather's drink as well" She exclaimed heading to the bar, but managed to turn around and mouth "He's cute, good one". I rolled my eyes and leaned as far as possible away from Potter, who now had reduced himself to almost part of the wall.

"You alright?" I asked.

"What? Oh yeah, I'm fine" He said, returning from the small child to his arrogant self.

"You sure? You went really odd just then" I told him.

"I am fine" he stated, emphasizing each word.

"If you're sure" I said. The drinks quickly came, me with my fire whiskey and Potter with his rum.

"So, what happens now?" Potter asked, whilst I was midway through my first gulp.

"You leave and I get to enjoy the night the way that I had planned" I suggested.

"No because if you think you are showing up to Quidditch practice hungover tomorrow you are wrong"

"Well I'm not heading back to the Castle just yet"

"Alright, but I am asking, hypothetically of course, what do you do next?"

"Well, I have another fire-whiskey and then find a guy to pay for it all"

"You find a guy to pay for it all"

"Yep, all my drinks for that night"

"Well, who do you pick?" He asked me. "If I wasn't here who would you pick tonight?"

I scanned the room looking for the perfect person for the job.

"That guy!" I told him, pointing to a brunette in the corner.

"Why him?"

"Well, number one he's not bad looking, if there was a photographer I wouldn't be embarrassed. Number two look at his left hand, no ring! Number three his appearance is clean and neat, emphasizing that he has been raised in a proper way and thus he has the money needed to pay for my drinks and my presence"

"Well, number one that is stupid, number two you sound like a whore and number three you are stupid, emphasizing that that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard" He mocked me.

"Really? Because your cousin is almost a pro at it" I teased, causing his face to tense up.

"She does this to?" He asked.

"Yep, Roxy, Lyndsey and I do this all the time!" I told him, the final drop of fire-whiskey going down my throat whilst I signaled to Rosmerta for another one.

"Fine, well how do you do it?" He asked, "Get them to pay for the drinks I mean"

"Well looking like this helps a hell of a lot" I pointed out.

"Wood, you are in your Quidditch uniform and haven't showered since practice, in which you ran four laps."

"Well neither have you! And besides we are talking hypothetically. Tonight my dear old Quidditch captain, you are paying for my drinks"

"I am?" He asked.

"Yep"

"Well, then I expect to be treated like any of your other sponsors. Treat me the way you would the guy at the bar"

"I don't want to do that" I stated.

"And why not?"

"Because it is a simple step-by-step process which I am not prepared to follow with you, even I have standards"

"Well, good luck finding someone to pay for your drinks dressed like that" He reminded me, making me again realize that I had no other choice.

"So, the first thing we do is make sure that we are in his radar, walk up to nearby him look him strait in the eye and smile" I told him, doing exactly what I was saying. "Our smile is encouraging and it means come to us, rule one is never go to them."

"Should I be taking notes?" Potter asked sarcastically. I let out a giggle.

"That is the other thing, laugh at everything he says. Rosmerta will soon come up and offer you a drink" I said as Rosmerta dropped off our second round of Fire-whiskey and rum "To which you politely decline, but he insists yes. You go on to chat with him throughout the evening, let him ramble on and on about himself, have a code name that you use rather than your real name and give as little detail about yourself as possible. Touch him in a seductive manner, but nothing too inappropriate."

I carried on teaching Potter the methods I had been using for the last couple of years, demonstrating them as I did so.

"And by the end of the night, when he is walking you out you turn to him and lean in and give him just a little peck on the lips"

"Do you now?" He asked. The evening had ended and I was now walking outside, slightly drunk and slightly closer to Potter than would normally be expected.

"Yep!" I announced, stumbling and holding on to him. Change that slightly to a lot.

"Well then where is my kiss? I believe I played along and payed for your drinks!"

"Oh I'm sorry my dear, here it is" I told him leaning in preparation and anticipation for the kiss.

Our eyes were closed and our lips almost joined when a flash of light interrupted us from our moment. Behind a large camera was a lady as old as Rosmerta with fake nails and a crocodile skin bag.

In short terms, we were screwed.