After.

Chapter Thirty: End game

Shepard lay beside him, eyes closed. Her auburn hair covered one eye, as her nostrils flared every few breaths. Steve lay within her arms – tail thrashing slightly in excitement as Joker watched them. The pilot took a deep breath, before lightly petting the cat – his mind running in circles. In a few hours, he was to report to the Normandy SR-2. Apparently EDI – hiding as a VI – had decided to 'lock' herself and was asking for 'administrator privileges,' or something. In short, she locked herself down and was asking for Joker without breaking the cover of being an advanced VI. However, Shepard was still on house arrest. She wasn't even allowed to go shopping without a guard. Recently, however, Joker had become well enough to go on his own. He had been recovering for a few months now. The physical therapy had restored most of his muscles, and the modifications Cerberus had made on his bones was still holding fast. Meanwhile, Shepard had managed to read hundreds of books and teach Steve more commands than he thought a cat could learn. Domestic house-life did not suit her.

Gaz's eyes opened slightly as the cat started to bat at Joker.

"Hey," she greeted in a sleepy tone, "Can't sleep?"

"Nervous."

"You'll be fine," she assured, her voice still clouded by a morning haze.

"I wish I could take you with me."

"I'll be fine. I'm glad they're bringing you in to help them out," she sat up slightly, placing a hand on his shoulder and squeezing it slightly. Joker leaned forward and kissed her deeply. Gaz opened her eyes when he pulled back, smiling brightly at the man.

"Gaz?"

"Yeah?" she ran her hand along his arm.

"I love you."

There was a beat of silence with an expression on Gaz's face that he couldn't identify. It actually scared him a bit. Then, she was close to him. Her mouth hungrily kissing his. Then she was on top of him, pulling at his clothing. Even though they had been 'together' for several months, they were yet to be fully intimate. When they were both aboard the Normandy – the occasion just never struck. Then Joker was out for a month and spent most of the time up until this point, recovering. Physical therapy was a big part. Chakwas didn't want him to strain himself – so Gaz had mostly been babying him. Sure, they kissed, and Shepard had given him a blow-job whenever the mood had struck her – and he repaid the favor whenever he felt physically okay to do so. But this...this felt different. She was down to a bra now, and he was fairly certain that neither one of them was wearing more than their underwear. When he had said the words only moments ago, he hadn't expected this response. At all. He simply wished for her to respond maybe. This, though? He was okay with this. Joker just wished she would say something. Her silence made him a bit uneasy.

Gaz continued kissing him, encouraging his hands to explore her body. His heart was pounding in his chest as she kicked back the covers with one foot to give herself more room. Or that's what he assumed. She crouched over him in an almost predatory fashion. It was somehow both frightening, as well as hot. Joker seriously contemplated whether he had ever been more turned on than he was in this exact moment. Feeling the need to interact more with the creature above him, he slid his fingers down the front of her underwear. She gasped at his touch, as smile crossing her freckled features.

It was strange to see Gaz in a normal set of underwear. Since the start of this relationship with Gaz, he had seen her 'down to her skivvies' several times. The woman tended to opt for even more N7 gear – with boycut underwear with the appropriate emblem and a sports bra. Always ready for combat. However, since Earth, she had slowly shifted away from her constant N7 gear. It was a bit sad to watch – but at this moment, he valued the power of panties.

Gaz's own fingers slid down his manhood, causing his eyes to slam shut at her touch. He forced them open to watch her expression. Joker wanted her so badly in the way he had only had Kelly in the past.

Joker carefully undid her bra-strap, as Shepard leaned forward and continued kissing him, her hips pressing against Joker's hardness. She managed to kick off her own panties and remove his Jurassic Park boxers with him hardly noticing – until she pressed herself against him, and it felt really different. She smiled down at him.

"Have a favorite position?" her voice low and sultry. It was the voice he had fantasized about in the past. It was everything he had ever hoped for.

"I...I don't care," he stuttered, attempting to play along with her sexy game, but just finding himself highly aware of his hands and suddenly forgetting how they normally sit without looking awkward.

"We can mix it up then..." and she slid on.

Joker grunted without meaning to – suddenly feeling like his entire life was leading up to this point. It was fantastic. It was glorious. It felt better than anything he had ever felt before. Including eating when hungry. Unlike Kelly, inside Shepard seemed to form around him...tighter. He had heard things about how slutty girls grew 'big' down there, but never really noticed until this point.

"Hahaha...enjoying this?" Gaz teased, noticing Joker's shuttering breaths.

Joker made an incoherent sound in response, causing Shepard to speed up slightly, before rolling Joker on top. The action was a bit violent for his taste – causing him to worry about his left arm slightly. His attention was immediately distracted as Shepard used her arms to pull him into a humping motion. Again, a bit violent – but he rolled with it. If he kept up, then she wouldn't paw at him and he'd be fine. The movement quickly distracted him from her violent nature, causing his mind to be lost of a land of bliss once more. Suddenly, Gaz was moving again – placing herself in a position that Joker knew as 'doggy' position, from porn. He adjusted and continued, not enjoying all the thinking. But, again, the sensation made up for anything that was bothering him. Especially since Gaz started to react. Or that's what he assumed from the sound she was making. He really wished he could see her face.

Then suddenly she was on top again, hurting the same arm in the process. She was vocal now, her expression beautiful. Gaz leaned forward and kissed him, keeping the motion up. Joker quickly caught up, starting to feel the pressure start to build inside him. Then she was loud. Really loud. Borderline uncomfortable loud. So loud he wondered how the entire SSV Normandy didn't hear her fuck Kaidan.

He quickly had to recover his mind to force himself to stay hard and not think about Kaidan. Her increased speed hurt his hips slightly. She was going too hard. But, again, the sensation overruled all things, causing his end to come quickly. He grunted and thrust upwards, before relaxing. Gaz smiled down at him, before she pushed off his body a bit too hard, and lay down next to him. Joker turned away to wince.

"I love you too," she whispered, missing his pained reaction, before kissing his cheek.

As she lay beside him, he tested a few of his bones, fairly certain the endorphins were protecting him from a few fractures. This, however, is when Gaz noticed something was wrong.

"Are...you okay...?" her voice panicked, as Joker winced after squeezing his left arm.

"Gaz...I'm...yeah I'll be fine."

"Tell me," her voice begged.

"I can tell you're used to sex with a non-handicapped biotic," he stated a bit harsher than he meant, "Fuck, Gaz, I think you broke like three bones. Did you even remember about my Vrolik's?"

He glanced over at her – feeling his endorphins lose to the natural sting of bones that haven't held together. Joker naturally grew snappy when he broke something. It was a defense mechanism he got as a child who often got broken by his friends. It was better than crying.

"I'm...I'm so sorry. I..."

"What? Forgot?"

Her expression was hurt, "I'm sorry Joker. I...yes I forgot. With your improvements from Cerberus, I sometimes forget how fragile you are. Yes, I'm used to rough sex with Kaidan. I'm used to being bioticly tossed around. I'm...sorry."

Joker looked at the time, "I'd better get going to I can go to the clinic before the Normandy."

"Joker, wait-"

"Gaz...I'm fine. I just...hate breaking things and I'm annoyed you forgot. It hurts in both senses. I wish we talked about this before diving in. We like different things in bed. I hate constantly moving. I like seeing your face – not your back. You can't just slam into my hips like that – they will break."

Gaz was silent. He hadn't seen that expression on her face since Ashley's death. Distant. Dark. It's how Shepard normally cried.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, covering herself with a blanket.

Joker disappeared into the bathroom, leaving Gaz to discover that Steve had been sitting on the pillows the entire time. Sliding her clothing back on, she lifted the cat into her arms. Steve purred happily, as she toyed with his red-and-white stripped collar.

"I'm the worst girlfriend ever," she informed the cat, holding him so he could see her, "I nearly just shattered Joker because I forgot he's breakable," her voice cracked, "Fuck..." she shook her head, as the bathroom door opened – Joker sliding into Alliance-blues. The original Normandy hat present on his wet hair. He limped slightly and was favoring his right arm.

"Fast shower?"

"Yeah," his voice flat, "I'll be back later."

"Message me?"

Joker paused as he turned for the door – his hat shadowing his expression. He turned back to Gaz and limped over to her, kissing her lightly on the mouth.

"Sorry I'm so...grrr," he whispered, still close to her, "I just...don't like being broken."

"I understand that."

"I still mean what I said," his lips curled into a smile, "Even if I did just have a tantrum of a three year old."

"Really?"

"Of course, Gaz," he cupped her face in one hand – petting her cheek with his thumb, "I love you. Even if our first time sexing ended a bit in disaster, that's not gonna change anything. We can work on that. Sex isn't a relationship. It's an added bonus."

Gaz gently pulled him into a deep kiss, "Have fun today, Joker. Tell EDI I say hi."

"See ya Gaz," he waved, backing carefully towards the door.

–

"Major Alenko?"

"Yes, Admiral?"

"We need you on Earth."

Kaidan narrowed his eyes at the holographic display of Anderson who was now wearing Alliance-blues after his resignation from the Council, "Of course, sir. What has come up?"

"We've lost all communication with the batarians."

"Chance of war?"

"Not sure. That hasn't been ruled out – but we've also lost view of their ships."

"Why does this require me, sir?"

"Because there's a very large chance that this...is the Reapers, Major."

Kaidan stared at the holo before him, feeling a lump in the back of his throat, "Reapers?"

"Minus Shepard exploding a Star System, when do they go dark like this Kaidan? Never. We're having a meeting in a few hours and would like your experience with Reapers to come into play."

"What about Shepard?"

"We're going to bring her in too. Only one Reaper witness at a time though. We want every opinion to be uncontaminated."

"I'll be on my way asap, sir."

"See you soon, Major."

–

"How the hell did you get all these fractures, Jeff?" Chakwas asked, tending to his wounds.

"I'm a professional, what can I say?"

"Jeff, I need to know."

"No you don't."

"Was it Kaidan?"

Joker froze.

"I heard he was to arrive on Earth as some point today from Anderson."

"I...uh...no, not him. Haven't seen him."

"Does his presence make you uneasy, Jeff?"

"He nearly killed me, Doc. What do you think?"

Chakwas frowned, "If it wasn't him, then what caused this?"

"I...slipped in the shower?"

"No you didn't."

"I...tripped?"

"Knees would have been destroyed."

"I..."

"Jeff, as a medical professional I need to know."

"This morning Gaz and I had sex and she's used to banging a biotic instead of a cripple and nearly shattered me in the process," the words fell out of his mouth as quickly as he could shape them. Joker's bright green eyes stared intently at his shoes.

"She did this to you?"

Joker slowly nodded, "It's fine, though."

"Not really. These are all hairline fractures and will be healed in about a day...but don't let this happen again."

"Believe me, I won't," Joker shook his head.

"I love the idea of you two together, Jeff, but if she can't handle your bone disorder...perhaps it's time to move on."

Joker glared up at Chakwas, "No."

"I'm just looking out for you, Jeff."

"I need to get going," Joker slid off of the examination table and disappeared through the door.

Chakwas folded her arms, and shook her head, before receiving a message telling her to find a flight to the Citadel.

"Huh..." her brows furrowed, "Being transferred. Thought this would come sooner."

–

Kaidan stepped out of the ship, surprised to see Anderson standing right outside the door, "This way, Major. Welcome back to Earth."

Alenko nodded in response, silently following the man to the meeting room. Anderson fiddled with his omni-tool the entire way, before waving Kaidan inside.

"Welcome, Major."

Kaidan bowed his head.

"We have now lost contact with several planets and systems. Earth's comm buoy has gone offline," Anderson began, his grand voice filling the room.

–

Gaz's omni-tool buzzed. Expecting it to be Joker, she frowned when she saw Anderson's name.

"Morning, Shepard. Get your ass over to Alliance headquarters. We have some Blues set-out for you. You have a meeting in a few hours. A man named Vega will brief you. See you then.

-Admiral Anderson"

Shepard frowned at the message, feeling as if something was off. She had heard he had resigned from the Council – leaving Udina in charge. But why the meeting now? Was she up for trial again? Sliding out of bed, she headed for the shower – her mind dancing with thoughts.

–

Joker settled into the seat of the Normandy, feeling a sense of right he hadn't felt in about six months.

"Oh I missed you, baby," he said quietly to the Normandy, petting the controls, as guards stepped just outside the door of the new bridge.

"I missed you too, Jeff."

"EDI!" a smile broke across his features, "It is amazing to hear your oddly sexy computer voice."

"I have no concept of 'sexy', but it is pleasant to be able to relax my processors around a pilot I already know the mannerisms of."

Joker couldn't hide the smile on his face, as he shook his head, "Have they been kind to you?"

"They all believe me to be a VI."

"You did good, EDI."

–

"With the evidence presented, Major, what is your opinion on the matter?"

Kaidan stared at the faces of the members of the board. They had all laughed Shepard out of rank with her claims – then decided to accuse her of being indoctrinated.

"From my experience with the Reapers, this could easily be the attack that Shepard and both crews of the Normandy have been warning the galaxy about for years."

–

Gaz slid into the new Alliance uniforms, feeling her heart flutter, before a rather muscled man approached the door.

"Commander," he saluted.

"I'm not a Commander anymore, remember?" she half-barked, "Why am I here?"

"There have been some issues that the board would like to see you about."

"That's vague. They tell you to say that?"

"That's all I know, ma'am."

"What's with the formalities? I was dishonorably discharged. I'm basically lower than a civilian now."

"You're still a Commander in my eyes," the man smiled, "I've read about you. They have no right."

"Tell them that."

–

"So why did you bring me on board?"

"I requested your presence, Jeff, because the Normandy will be needing you today."

"Wait...what?"

"The Alliance is ignoring readings which prove Shepard was not lying."

"What are you saying, EDI?"

"The Reapers are coming, Jeff."

–

AN: THE END. INSERT ALL OF MASS EFFECT 3 HERE. I didn't want to directly quote the beginning of Mass Effect 3, because I hate typing something you've already heard. That's why I cut around so much at the end. I was avoiding canon as hard as I could. For instance, the Vega/Shepard part is their first meeting of the day. In my head he comes back in an hour or two and that's where Mass Effect 3 basically starts. I know in the game EDI calls Joker back sooner, but I like my version better. There's something haunting about EDI saying that last too. It creeped me out. Also – SHEPARD JOKER SEX. Not every first sexy-time with a person is going to be perfect – especially if one is used to sexing a biotic – which I have to imagine is somewhat more blue and aggressive. Not as blue as asari sex, but more glowy. I've put too much thought into this. ANYWAY. That was the longest fan fiction I've ever written and I hope you enjoyed. I plan to write more Mass Effect stuff soon – so keep an eye out. For those of you who have read all these words – damn you're awesome. You're all so awesome.

Rated M for: Language, sexual situations, violence, and so I can have freedom without fear of scarring a teen for life.

Oh – and I don't own anything ever.