A/N: This is the final chapter and we are back with Klink's POV. I have added additional material to the end of the episode (you'll see when you get there!).

Top Hat, White Tie, and Bomb Sights – 7

We arrived late back at camp, after the evening of drinking and dancing. I had seen my hopes for a future with Gretchen burn into ashes before my eyes. When I dropped her off at her house, I knew that I would never see her again. Her behavior with Hogan had been intolerable!

I was disappointed, but not as angry as I had thought I would be. I nursed one tiny spark of hope in my heart from the evening. I had seen Gretchen kiss Hogan. Instead of kissing her back he had glanced nervously in my direction, and then looked disgusted as she walked away. I interpreted it to mean that Hogan also felt her behavior was inappropriate, even though he had seemed to encourage it.

So, instead of mourning the loss of Gretchen's affections, I spent the ride back to Stalag 13 wondering about the man beside me. By this time I was thoroughly confused. Did he like women or men? I had evidence to argue in favor of both. There had been the fellow prisoner he had passionately kissed, but then he seemed to flirt with every woman that crossed his path. If he was acting, he did it very well.

I was no nearer solving the puzzle of Hogan by the time we had settled into my office to listen to Hogan's information on the Norden. He had changed back into his American uniform, and General Burkhalter had collected Major Klopfer to take pictures and ask technical questions.

I pushed all thoughts of Gretchen and the question of Hogan's bed partners to focus on Hogan's discussion. I was warmed by the idea that I had managed to win his confidence, and that tonight would be the start of a whole new chapter in our relationship. We would now be comrades in arms, if not friends as well. In addition, General Burkhalter would be in my debt, and my career would surely receive an important, long overdue boost.

In a few moments, Hogan managed to destroy that dream as well.

As Hogan finished his drawing of the Norden, Klopfer exclaimed, "General! This man is describing a vacuum cleaner, not a bomb sight!"

"What?" thundered Burkhalter in extreme displeasure.

"Vacuum cleaner?" I heard myself repeat in a horrified tone.

"Norden makes one of the greatest vacuum cleaners in the world!" exclaimed Hogan cheerfully.

Burkhalter rose from his chair and towered over me.

"Congratulations Klink, you've done it again!"

I saluted him in terrified bewilderment. He didn't return my salute, only turned and stormed out of the office, followed by Major Klopfer.

I got up and confronted Hogan face to face, temporarily forgetting that my hidden microphones in his quarters were supposed to be a secret.

"But you said you tested the Norden," I insisted.

"I had one in my room at the base where I trained," he shrugged.

"We wined you and dined you and now you're describing a vacuum cleaner," I protested.

"You asked me, remember?" he threw back.

I made one last appeal, "You're going to get me into a lot of trouble for this."

I regretted it immediately; Hogan didn't need to know how precarious my position might be. It would only give him more power to manipulate me.

"Besides that, you owe me 500 marks for the champagne alone."

Great, now I'd told him the state of my finances.

"Forget it," Hogan said dismissively.

"Forget it, he says," I said throwing up my arms in disgust.

"Of course. What good is money going to do you at the Russian front?" he asked.

I took out my monocle and stared at him in horror. I simply didn't know what to say.

After a second Hogan's smile faded and he gave a sigh.

"Kommandant, don't you think you should have a word with Burkhalter before he leaves?"

I shook myself, "Yes. You are dismissed to your quarters."

I paused, and then added angrily, "Enjoy yourself tonight because it's the last night you'll be spending in my bed."

As I hurried in pursuit of the general, I fretted that my final comment to Hogan sounded petty and spiteful, rather than full of the offended dignity I had intended to project. Somehow, nothing I did in front of Hogan came out as I intended.

I managed to catch General Burkhalter just as he was getting into his car.

"General," I began, "I am terribly sorry for this misunderstanding, but you heard the tape yourself – "

"Shut up, Klink," Burkhalter snapped, sounding a bit tired.

"Yes sir," I replied.

"Klink, I am instructing both you and Major Klopfer to forget that this ever happened. We will never mention this event again, ever."

"Very good, sir," I agreed.

With that, the General sighed heavily as he lowered himself into the car. His driver slammed the door shut and I stood at attention as the car drove away.

The next morning I made good on my promise and sent Schultz to collect all my belongings from Hogan's quarters. The old bunk was to be put back, but I said that the travel posters could stay if Hogan wanted them.

I paced my office as my orders were carried out. Eventually, I made my way over to Barracks 2. I wanted to see if Hogan showed any sign of regret over the consequences of his little joke.

Schultz apparently heard me approaching because he announced loudly, "All done Herr Kommandant," before I entered the room.

"Very good Schultz!" I responded as I marched into Hogan's room. Oddly, he and Hogan looked slightly surprised to see me.

"Now Hogan," I began firmly, before giving him a chance to try and charm or befuddle me, "General Burkhalter was kind enough to forget the whole matter, but I am going to teach you – "

"Just one minute, Kommandant," Hogan interrupted me, "one more THING." He reached up and yanked a microphone out of the lamp above his table.

"This," he continued, handing it to me, "and these," he picked up a pile of wires and listening devices from the table and placed them in my hands.

"You'd better take them along. I wouldn't want to hurt your feelings," he ended with a wicked smile.

"Hurt my feelings?" I repeated in shock.

"I may talk about Gretchen in my sleep."

I swallowed a sudden wave of nausea.

"Schultz," I said, hating how weak I sounded.

"Yes, Kommandant?"

"Take these," I said, shoving the microphones in his hands, "dismissed."

"Jawohl, Herr Kommandant."

Schultz hurried from the room and I closed the door behind him. I turned and leaned against it as Hogan gave me one of his calculating stares.

"You knew all along," I said.

Hogan said nothing, but inclined his head to indicate agreement.

"All this business…about the Norden…was, what? An elaborate prank to humiliate me?"

Hogan paused a moment before answering, still studying me carefully, "I was angry, Kommandant. How would you feel if you found listening devices in your bedroom?"

I felt my face flush, but couldn't think of anything to say.

After a moment of silence, Hogan started toward me slowly, almost prowling.

"Kommandant? I asked you a question: How would you feel – if you knew someone was listening to you in bed? Would you be offended? Angry? Maybe terrified?"

Hogan had approached me slowly, never taking his eyes from mine. I was near panic, my heart pounding and sweat trickling down my back, in spite of the chill. Any moment, Hogan was going to be against me. What did he want? Was he going to attack me? Was he insinuating that he knew about me? My mouth was dry and my throat seemed to have closed up. I'm not sure I would have been able to speak, had I known what to say.

"We all have secrets, Kommandant. Secrets we share only in our most private moments, at our most vulnerable – with our lovers, or in our dreams – or in the dreams we have of our lovers. I don't think you want to hear my dreams, Kommandant, so I strongly suggest that you never bug my quarters again."

He was pressed against me now, just lightly, but enough for me to feel the physical threat of his presence, the suggestion of the weight and power of his body. I had never been so frightened, and yet, I found to my horror that it was also arousing. If he pressed just a bit closer, I was convinced he would feel my heart thundering with the strange mixture of excitement and terror coursing through my body.

"Hogan," I managed to croak, "please…"

I really didn't even know how to finish that thought.

He immediately stepped back, still studying me carefully, staring at me as if he'd never seen me before.

I closed my eyes and rested my head against the door, taking a few deep breaths to regain some semblance of composure.

When I opened my eyes again, Hogan was still looking at me, although now his expression was thoughtful, rather than penetrating.

"Hogan," I said, in a slightly more normal tone of voice, "don't ever threaten me again or I will put you in the cooler."

"It wasn't a threat, sir, just a suggestion."

"Well, I suggest that you maintain an attitude of respect while making suggestions," I snapped.

"Respect goes both ways Kommandant."

"It does," I acknowledged after a few seconds, "but let me ask you, Hogan, between the two of us, who do you think truly respects the other more?"

Hogan's eyes widened in surprise; it was enough. I turned and left.

END

A/N: *whew* Well…what do you think?