Agatha took off with the disclaimer that I don't own any X-Men Evolution characters. You got it, another pointless fic. Don't you just love 'em?
Brotherhood Breakfast
"Why do I have to be the one to get breakfast?" Mystique grumbled.
"Well the children do need to be fed," Agatha told her. "Do you really want any of them to cook?"
"You're right," Mystique groaned. "The last thing I need is another hole in my house!" Grumbling under her breath she got out cereal, toast, oatmeal and made eggs and bacon. "I hope that's enough," she sighed as she looked at the fifty-three fried eggs and several rashers of bacon. "Back to cooking breakfast for the Blob! A dream come true!"
She went to their rooms and kicked the doors in. "WAKE UP YOU LOSERS!" She shouted. "RISE AND SHINE! TIME TO GET UP!"
"I'm up! I'm up already," Wanda snapped. "Who wouldn't be up with the noise you make?"
"Get up Pietro!" Mystique shouted.
"Tell morning to come back later," Pietro groaned in his bed.
"Wanda, you wanna wake up your brother?" Mystique asked.
"I'mupI'mup!" He jumped out of his bed.
"Lance wake up!" She snapped, standing over his bed.
"Okay Tabby, I'll get up. Man I had this nightmare that Mystique came back and…" Lance mumbled as he wiped the sleep from his eyes. "Uh oh…"
"This isn't exactly a dream come true for me either mister!" She snapped. "Get up!" She went to Todd's room. She dreaded going in there. "Toad! Get up!" She pounded on the door. No response. She went inside and saw a lump in the bed. "Toad get up!" She said again. Once again there was no response.
"TOAD GET YOUR LAZY BUTT…" She pulled back the covers only to find a heap of clothes. "Toad? AGGGHHH!" She screamed when she saw a fully dressed Todd behind her. "What are you doing up? I thought you were still in bed?"
"I woke up early and I couldn't get back to sleep," Todd told her. "I thought I might as well get an early jump on the bathroom. See my hands?" He presented them to her. "Clean!"
"They are clean," She blinked. "Don't tell me you actually used soap?"
"Uh…" Todd fidgeted nervously.
"Hey how did all this toothpaste get on all the walls?" Pietro shouted from the bathroom. "Oh gross! Toad did you take slime bath again?"
"Oh wonderful," Mystique rolled her eyes. "Things to never ask Toad to do, Number 33: Don't ask him to clean up."
"OKAY WHO TOOK MY CLEAR NAIL POLISH?" Wanda screamed.
Mystique glared at Todd. "Don't look at me," He told her. "I didn't do it!"
"PIETRO!" Wanda pounded on the door.
"See?" Todd told her.
"Why am I not shocked?" Mystique groaned as she went back into the halls. She kicked in Fred's door. "WAKE UP BLOB!"
Fred lay there, oblivious to the world, snoring peacefully. "Oh Freddy," Mystique said in a semi sweet voice. She then shouted in his ear. "GET UP YOU LAZY BUM!"
Fred merely rolled over, still unconscious. "WAKE UP!" She screamed, kicking his backside. Immediately she realized that probably wasn't the smartest thing to do to someone with invulnerable skin. "YEOWWW!"
"What, Fred still out?" Todd came in and saw Mystique hopping on one foot. "You try waking him up?"
"No Toad I thought I'd wait for Mr. Sun to come down and sing him a little wake up song!" She snarled. "Of course I tried waking him up you idiot!"
"You want me to wake him?" Todd asked.
"What I'd really like you to do is something that is not appropriate at this time of the morning," She snapped. "Let's just say it involves a firecracker, a shoehorn and your backside! OF COURSE I WANT YOU TO WAKE HIM UP!"
"Okay, Okay," Todd said. "Uh…you might want to move away from him first."
"Just get him up!"
"But…"
"DO IT!"
"Okay," Todd said. Then he said in a normal voice. "Hey yo Freddy, breakfast!"
"BREAKFAST!" Fred shot up out of the bed. "GOODY!" He jumped out of bed and knocked Mystique down to the floor.
Todd stood over her. "I told you to move."
"I hate my life," She groaned before she passed out. "I hate my life."
By the time she managed to get on her feet and downstairs, breakfast was in full swing. "Oh god I'd forgotten how atrocious your eating habits were," She moaned. "Toad stop using your tongue to grab food from other people's plates! Blob chew your food! Don't swallow your food whole! Pietro don't draw those kinds of pictures with the ketchup! Lance stop playing with your oatmeal!"
"Is that what this is?" Lance asked.
"Fred leave enough food for the rest of us!" Mystique snapped.
"Can't you make any more?" Fred pouted.
"There's already enough food to feed the entire nation of Bolivia on the table," Lance snickered.
"Wanda stop attacking your brother with toast!" Mystique shouted.
"Hey at least I'm not using silverware," She said.
"That's because you broke almost all of it yesterday!" Pietro snapped. "Yikes!" He dodged another piece of toast. He threw an egg back at her but Wanda hexed it and it hit Lance.
"HEY!" He snapped. "What's the big idea?"
"I was aiming for him!" Wanda snapped as Pietro snickered.
Lance threw his oatmeal at him but it hit Fred. "Cut it out!" Fred roared. "EEWW! TOAD!" Todd used his tongue to lick it off him. "You wanna start another food fight?"
"Another one?" Mystique looked at the spattered cereal all over the walls and floor. "What happened?"
"He started it!" Wanda pointed to Pietro.
"Did not!" Pietro said.
"Did too!" Wanda stuck her tongue out at him.
"Did not!" Pietro protested.
"Actually Pietro you did start it," Fred said. "You were saying some stuff about well, uh…You Know Who…You know the 'M' word and…"
"Never mind!" Mystique sat down and grabbed some toast. "Let's try to have some peace this morning, shall we? Where's Agatha?"
"I dunno," Lance munched on an apple. "She said she had to get something during the food fight. She left you a note on the fridge." He pointed.
Mystique got up and took the note off the fridge. "Okay everybody listen," She said. "In the future when we leave notes on the fridge we do not use an iron stake! Use a magnet like everyone else!"
"Agatha did it!" Pietro snapped. "Not us!"
"Dear Raven," Mystique read the note. "Went out to get some milk. Won't be back for several years. Agatha." She calmly crumpled the note. "Excuse me," She walked up stairs and screamed.
"Is she always this uptight?" Wanda asked.
"Are you kidding?" Lance told her. "She's really mellowed out since we last saw her."
"She must have really missed us!" Fred smiled as he ate Mystique's toast.