A/n Soooo, this is my first Brittana fanfiction. I've written other stories but no fanfiction yet. So please be kind.

A few days ago i was listening to a Kelly Clarkson song called save you and then another song by the same artist (yes, i love Kelly Clarkson) calles if no one will listen.. And this story just popped into my head. So you have to wait patiently for me to interpret the songs into the story. maybe i'll add more. But i'm not sure yet.

Enjoy

Confessions

It's been 2 weeks since that horror moment in the hallway. 2 of the most terrible weeks of her life. She thought by telling her best friend that she was in love with her would make things better. Less confusing. She even had hope that maybe she'd feel the same and they could be together. The only thing that Brittany had to do was drop wheeler-boy. But she didn't, apparently she loves him too. Even after 2 weeks the words still cut through her like a knife.

How could she be so stupid to let those words just seep out of her? She kept them hidden for so long. Years and years. Why couldn't she have kept them hidden for another year and then high school would be over. But the words just burst out of her. Expressing her feelings, like Brittany had wanted her too. It all started with those stupid, useless feelings. Santana fucking Lopez didn't do feelings, right? She was the HBIC at McKinley. She didn't fall in love with her best friend. But now it's all ruined. Everyone's gonna know now because of the stupid webcast Brittany put on the internet.

''I heard a rumor that Santana plays for another team, and I can confirm that rumor. It's a 100% true.''

She was furious when she first watched it. Furious at Brittany for laying her feelings out in the open for anyone to see. She knew Brittany wasn't stupid or slow like everyone thinks. She's actually really smart, but people just don't understand what she's about sometimes. That's why she can't understand how Brittany could do that to her. She knew how bad it hurt. But after the initial shock and anger came facing the truth. Everyone was going to know now. The whole school, hell the whole freaking world. Her body was shaking heavily and the first sob bubbles up from the back of her throat. Tears began to cascade down her cheeks and soon enough her legs won't carry her anymore and she stumbles over to the bed. She falls face first into her pillows and curls herself up into a ball. Through her blurry vision she still sees the paused video on the screen of her laptop. She falls asleep watching a still image of Brittany licking some cheese of her fingers.

Santana wakes up to a soft hand stroking her hair.
''Brittany..'' she croaks out and slowly opens her eyes. She looks around her room and notices that it's dark. She must have slept for hours. The only light in her room is her bedside lamp. Then she realizes that someone is still stroking her hair and it wasn't just a dream. She looks up and squints her eyes. Her mother is lying next to her. A new wave of tears hits her at the soft gesture. She can't help but think that Brittany used to do that when she slept over. She always woke up before Santana did and then she just watched her sleep. Some may find it creepy but she just found in adorable. Now her mother is in the same position.

''Mija, what's wrong? Why have you been crying?'' Her mother's eyes are filled with concern.

Santana curls up into a ball again and lays her head in her mother lap. A safe feeling washes over her as tears force their way out of her eyes again.

''You're gonna hate me.'' She mumbles between sobs. After a few minutes of silent crying she looks up and sees her mother's hurt expression.

''How could you think that Santana. I could never hate you! You're my daughter, my own flesh and blood. My love for you is unconditional.''

Santana feels the love wash over her and attacks her mom with a hug. Her mother holds her tight as the last of her tears subside. Her mother gently squeezes her shoulders and pushes her back.

''Now mija, tell what's wrong.''

Santana feels the fear gathering in her stomach. It presses the air out of her longs and it's hard for her to breathe. She takes a few short breaths and then looks up to her mom. It's now or never she thinks.

''Mom, I'm gay..'' Her voice is so soft that she's convinced that her mother hasn't heard her. So she gathers her courage and says it again. This time it's much louder and she feels the fear subsiding from her stomach and she can breathe again. A strong feeling of relieve washes over her, but it disappears quickly when she realizes that her mother hasn't said anything yet. She looks up and sees tears in her mother's eyes. She is hit by panic as she stands up off the bed and starts pacing her room.

''I knew you were going to hate me, I knew it.'' Tears start streaming down her face again as she mumbles the words more to herself then to her mother. The panic starts to make her body tremble and her mind runs wild.

''You probably want me to leave the house, I understand. I'm a disgrace to the family, I hate myself for being such a bad daughter. I'll start packing..''

As soon as she reaches for a Cheerio duffle bag, the one she stole from Sue Sylvester when she quit the Cheerios, her mother rushes of her bed and envelopes her in a bear hug. Santana stiffens in her mother's hold, confused by her reaction. She had tears in her eyes, right? She was a disgrace to the family, an outcast. Why is her mother hugging her.

Her thoughts come to a halt when her mother answers the questions in her mind.

''Mija, I'm not crying because I hate you or because you're a disgrace. Because neither of those things are true. You being gay doesn't change the way I look at you. You're still my daughter and I still love you. I know our family is conservative but they will come around even if they don't like it at the beginning. You're still part of the family. And I'm going to help you get through this. I know it's hard, but please don't forget that I love you, and you're father love. Even if he isn't around that much. Please don't forget that.''

Santana and her mother are both crying and hang on to each other.

''I love you, mom. This is so hard, why does it have to be so hard..''

''I know, baby, I know. I'm gonna help you in any way I can.''